Phoenix Rising
by Dramamama5
Summary: For over four years the team has been fractured and their team lead left on his own. During this course of time they have seen what being alone has done to their former team mate. The journey isn't quite over but now they fight to bring home their lost brother. Will they succeed? Or will the dark path he's on completely destroy him once and for all? Only one way to find out…
1. Chapter 1

Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Green Day

I walk a lonely road

The only one that I have ever known

Don't know where it goes

But it's only me, and I walk alone

I walk this empty street

On the boulevard of broken dreams

Where the city sleeps

And I'm the only one, and I walk alone

I walk alone, I walk alone

I walk alone and I walk a

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me

My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me

Till then I walk alone

Ah ah ah ah ah

Ah ah ah ah ah

I'm walking down the line

That divides me somewhere in my mind

On the border line of the edge

And where I walk alone

Read between the lines

What's fucked up and every thing's all right

Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive

And I walk alone

I walk alone, I walk alone

I walk…

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE:** **Hi there! This has been a long time in the making… almost a year. I will tell you, I am almost as nervous about this one as I was my first. Please, drop me a quick line to let me know what you think. While this story is actually completely finished and ready for posting, that's not to say I wouldn't possibly alter things a bit in the process if the idea enhanced the story. I only ask that reviews remain positively constructive. I have also decided to add kind of a theme song for each chapter… just for fun. I listened to these songs while writing this. They just SCREAMED "CALLEN!" LOL Well, let's get started, shall we?**

 **DISCLAIMER:** **I am afraid I do not own the character's of NCIS LA... I wish... but for now, I just get to play around with their lives for a little while.**

The holidays were behind them and the team had returned to the OSP from their vacations. Though he remained in contact with the team, Sam had made no move to return to his job as lead field agent… and while Callen had made it known that he was back in LA, there had been no further contact since their Christmas sighting.

Eric had even agreed to do a search for him but Callen remained as elusive as ever.

"What's he playing at?" Sam asked Hetty during a regular check-in he had agreed to prior to taking his leave.

"Your guess is as good as mine, Sam… but he wanted us to know he was back and if I were to hazard a guess, it wasn't simply to reconnect. Suffice it to say, we will know no sooner than he decides to share with us." Hetty replied with an ache in her heart. There was a storm brewing and she was at the center of it… of that she had no doubt.

For years she had avoided Callen's queries into his past by saying it was for his own safety and indeed it was but it was an excuse that held little weight now. She had told blatant lies. Now, though, she feared the day was fast approaching when she would be forced to reveal the truth because, as it turned out, she wasn't the only one who had a, "to be opened upon my death" envelope. Owen Granger had beaten her to the draw.

Hetty sighed as she poured another cup of Licorice Mint tea. The only question was, when would he come demanding those answers? When he did, would she lose the one person who meant the world to her, forever?

After leaving the OSP that night, Callen had found himself a room to rent. He wouldn't stay long. It was just a place to stay for the holidays. They knew he was back and all bets were off the moment he stepped through those doors of the OSP. He had no doubt Hetty was all over Eric to find him. Let them play their games. Right now, he needed to figure a few things out. He needed to get to the bottom of Granger's letter.

In the meantime, Gibbs was more than frustrated with his lack of communication. Vance was pushing for an answer regarding his return and Blackguard was calling him daily, wanting him to resume his missions for them.

Deciding he only had answers to please one of the three, he made the call.

"So, where the hell have you been, Callen?" Gibbs growled upon answering the phone.

"Missed you too, Gibbs." Callen smirked knowing it would just anger his friend more than he already was.

"Damn it, Callen! People have been worried about you!"

He thought a moment before answering this time. "People? Can't be that many. Vance and Blackguard merely want my services. That doesn't much leave many others… besides you and Abby and for that, I do apologize. I took the scenic route back in an attempt to clear my head and figure a few things out."

"Scenic route… clear your head. What, exactly, have you been doing for the past three months if you weren't clearing your head and figuring things out?!" Gibbs threw back, thoroughly frustrated with his friend.

"Complicated" Callen replied.

"What's complicated? What have you been into now?" Gibbs asked. Upon hearing the release of a frustrated sigh on the other end of the call, he lowered his voice in response, "What's going on Callen?"

"I'm trying to figure out my next move. I found out a few things that have made the decision that much more difficult. As I said, complicated."

"What things?" Gibbs knew if it sent Callen packing, it wasn't good and most likely involved Henrietta Lange, "I had hoped maybe the issues with your team had begun to resolve."

"Not my team, Gibbs" Callen retorted. He could almost see his friend's eyeroll, "I still don't trust them but they are the least of my problems."

"Callen… what the hell is going on there?" Gibbs repeated.

He debated just cutting the call short but he knew that would not sit well with the man. He would be on the first plane out with Leon Vance's blessing. With a sigh, he made the decision to share with Gibbs what he knew…

"So, they have known who you were all along? Your name?!"

"Yes, as well as the fact that they'd all known each other. All this time… pretending. They lied to me! They looked me in the eye, they worked with me all these years… they made me believe in their friendship and all the while they were lying to me!" Callen growled, "the sad thing is, I didn't see it. She had me so distracted with the team and the job that I completely missed it!"

"Why though?" Gibbs asked, completely taken back.

"Why does Hetty do anything?" Callen stated.

Gibbs could hear the hurt and disappointment in his voice. He could understand the anger and resentment that he knew Callen had to be battling with. Perhaps he and Hetty needed to have another chat.

For as long as he had known Callen, the kid had never seemed to catch a break. Every partner he had either turned out bad and burned him or asked for a new partner because they weren't able to connect with him. The Blackguard always seemed to be after him. There wasn't an agency out there that didn't want him for his undercover abilities and he got burned every time. One jaunt with the CIA was about his undoing. Finally, he landed with NCIS and that all seemed to change. He thought maybe this was it. When he had come to LA to work a case with Lara Macy and Callen, he had been pleased to find Callen somewhat settled and in his own words, 'borderline content'. Shortly after that conversation, Callen was nearly killed by five bullets in a drive by shooting on the streets of Venice Beach.

It all started a slow decline. A decline that placed them where they were today. His friend was so far removed from the happy, almost content, individual of that day in the park.

"So, what do you plan to do about it?"

"Undecided. How can I trust anything she says or any of them for that matter?" Callen asked.

"Well, you better figure it out. Time is ticking. None of us are getting any younger. You planning on going back to work any time soon?"

"Haven't decided. Blackguard has several cases they want me to handle." Callen stated blandly.

"Are you kidding me? Callen, you nearly died on their watch!" Gibbs yelled into the phone.

"I've nearly died on the watch of every agency I've worked for. It goes with the territory." Callen replied calmly.

"Some more than others…" Gibbs said with a chuckle before growing serious once more. "I don't like it, Callen. Look, you want answers then you need to stick around there."

"Let me get this straight, you're suggesting I go back to work there? Jethro, how do I work with people I don't trust?"

"You don't trust anyone, Callen."

Everything went silent… neither sure what to say when Callen finally answered softly, "Exactly."


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER** **: No, I do not own anything pertaining to NCIS LA! It bums me to say it... but there it is...**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, how about that. For whatever reason, I can't seem to get anything to post without doing a take two. cheesh! OKAY... so here we go... again. Thank you to everyone who took the time to read, review, favorite, and/or follow this story... I feel so very blessed. I love reading your reviews and I listen. So... in that spirit... it has come to my attention that perhaps some of you are new to my stories. I do not have this marked as being in a series... mainly because ALL of my stories are connected by little facts what not... but the last THREE stories are intricately connected... this is really not a stand alone story. Should you be interested in going back and reading ALL my stories, I would love to hear from you as you read them. If you are interested in reading or rereading the stories from this specific story line... they are in order as follows: "On the Other Side of Fear Lies Freedom", "The G Callen Job", and "A Time to Remember" … Now... for those maybe thinking about reading these stories but don't want to wait... here's the answer to Blackguard... well, not ALLLLLLL the answers... Blackguard is a highly trained Black Ops group intricately connected with the CIA (which we know Callen dabbled in previously). One particularly deadly faction of Blackguard is the Renegades. They are specifically trained in government sanctioned assassinations and interrogations. Scattered throughout my previous stories, it is mentioned that there was a particular agency that was very interested in Callen but he kept refusing their offers... However, as we learn in "On the Other Side of Fear Lies Freedom"... things happen and your world can change in an instant... leaving you doing things you never thought you would find yourself doing... Now, without further adieu... OHHHHH, sorry, no theme song today... this chapter is more introductory in a way... a calm moment, if you will. We have a lot to look forward. Hopefully you will stick with me and enjoy the ride... every wild ride needs music! Go! Read! Review...pllllllleeeeeeaaaaaasssseeee…. positively constructive preferable... HA**

Callen finally answered softly, "Exactly."

"Fine… and I'm not saying you don't have good reason. Hell, if anyone had reason for trust issues, it would be you, hands down. But Callen, it's time you stop running and get back to the business of living. You can't do that working for the Guard. The life of a Renegade is not conducive to living…" Gibbs stated before yelling to someone in the background, "yeah, be there in a minute! Duty calls, kid."

"Later," he replied.

"Hey! Think about what I said. You had a good thing going there once. You said so yourself. You were happy, bordering on content. You know you miss it… them… and that includes Hetty. They made a mistake… several, actually. Maybe it's time to forgive and give them a chance to right it." With that, Gibbs disconnected the call.

Callen sat looking at his phone. Try though he might, he didn't have an argument left.

Tucking his phone into his pocket, he abandoned the idea of sleep for a walk on the beach in search of peace.

The next morning Sam called the office looking for Kensi or Deeks. He figured if Callen was going to contact anyone, it would be them.

"Sorry, big guy, no one has seen or heard from him since Christmas. Think he skipped town again?" Deeks asked.

"No, he's here. He's not happy about something and he's stewing… not a good thing, Deeks," Sam replied.

"I was afraid you'd say that. Any ideas where he might be?"

"I don't have a clue. He's back to his old ways. Back when we first met, no one knew where he was until they needed to know. It drove Macy crazy." Sam chuckled.

"Then I guess we wait." Deeks stated.

"Yeah, I guess."

"So, the kids back to school?" Deeks asked, hoping to distract Sam from his frustration.

"Yeah, it's too quiet around here without them." Sam replied solemnly.

"Bet they were upset at Callen not showing up."

"No, actually. I think they just accepted the reality that Callen… No… damn it!" Sam growled at the end.

"Sam, what's wrong?" Deeks asked.

"The kids…"

"What about them?" Deeks asked, confused.

"They weren't upset, Deeks. They weren't anything!" Sam explained.

"Okay… so maybe after all this time they've accepted that he isn't coming back and they are ready to move on." Deeks offered.

"No, Marty. They haven't moved on. They didn't react because they'd already been in contact with him." Sam stated gruffly, "I'll call you back." Sam didn't wait for a reply but hung up and immediately dialed his son's number.

"Hey dad," Aiden answered, "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Have a question for you, son." Sam stated.

"Okay," Aiden replied, picking up on the tension in his father's voice.

"Have either you or your sister been in contact with G?"

Silence followed.

"Aiden, I asked you a question."

With a sigh, Aiden finally answered, "Yes."

"When? How?" Sam demanded.

"When he came back to town. He wanted to wish us a Merry Christmas. Back when he left here a few months ago, he had given Kamran and myself each an untraceable phone to keep us all safe."

"And you didn't think to share this information with me?" Sam inquired.

"No, Dad. Uncle G said not to. He said whatever happened between you two needed to stay that way. He made a promise to mom to always be there for Kam and myself and he intended to keep that promise." Aiden explained.

"He had NO right to ask you to keep secrets from me," Sam remarked, not hiding his anger.

"Even if he told us to tell you, I wouldn't have. Kamran needed this dad… so did I… and I knew if we told you, then you would have taken them." Aiden stood firm.

Sam couldn't help but admire his son. He stood his ground in the face of his father's wrath. He also couldn't argue with him. He would have done just that. "Fine. You're right, I probably would have. Look, I don't want to be the reason you lose touch with him again."

"We cool?" Aiden asked.

"Yeah, son, we're cool." Sam replied reassuringly.

"You need to fix this for Kamran's sake, if not your own. He cared about mom too and he misses her almost as much as we do… and Kamran misses him." Aiden daringly pushed.

"I know, Aiden. She's not the only one who misses him. Hard to fix this when I don't know where he's hiding." Sam replied.

"He's coming back just as soon as he figures a few things out." Aiden tried to reassure his father. He didn't know what caused the rift but he knew his dad missed their Uncle Callen and he knew enough to know Callen needed them… all.

"Figure what out? Did he say?" Sam asked feeling the knot in his stomach tighten.

"No, not really. Job maybe? He said he may have to go away again and we wouldn't always be able to contact him. Kamran was NOT happy."

"Damn" was his only reply.

"Dad?" Aiden asked, immediately concerned.

"Sorry, it's all good. You best be getting back to your studies. I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Yes, sir."

Sam disconnected the call and immediately rang Deeks back.

"Hey Sam. Everything okay? You hung up rather quickly when you called earlier." Deeks greeted.

"No. Callen gave my kids each an untraceable burner in order to stay in contact… with the understanding they not tell me." Sam explained.

"What? That's crazy," Deeks replied.

"I was upset at first… still am… but I guess I understand his reasoning." Sam explained.

"Which was?"

"Michelle… keeping a promise."

"Oh, wow… you okay with this?" Deeks asked.

"Yeah. We have bigger issues." Sam warned.

"Crap. What now?" Deeks groaned, putting the call on speaker.

"Hey Sam." Kensi called out.

"Hey, Kens… Look, I think Callen is heading back to Blackguard." Sam explained.

"What? No, he can't!" Kensi cried out, followed by Deeks, "Why? Why would he do that?"

"I don't know. Something is going on and my guess is, it has everything to do with Hetty." Sam replied.

"Hetty? Why? What makes you think that? Seems to me he's got issues with the lot of us." Deeks explained.

"That's true, but he was able to see past that to at least work with us… but Hetty?"

"He's right, he never gave Hetty an inch", Kensi agreed, "but Sam, he didn't work with you either. If we're going to look at the reasons, he isn't coming back… you and Hetty are maybe his biggest.

"She has a point, man… whatever was the problem then is still a problem now."

"Callen didn't forgive us. He tolerated us in order to save Kamran." Kensi added.

"I don't know. What I do know is, it's time to bring his stubborn ass home… I've just no clue where to find him." Sam replied.


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER** **: As if to rub salt in the wound… NO, I do NOT own any part of the NCIS LA characters or otherwise. Do I wish? Of course, as the saying goes. 'If wishes were horses then beggars would ride'…. Sigh.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Okay, chapter three. I hope you are getting a sense of what is to come. I promised in the beginning that our boy would find his way home… I NEVER said it was going to be easy…**

 **Thank you to everyone who is reading, and a very special thank you to those who take time to review, favorite and follow! It is such a boost to the writer when you stop by to just say 'hey, good story' or whatever.**

 **This is another one of those chapters that isn't calling out for a specific song. Bums me.**

 **Okay, enjoy!**

"I don't know. What I do know is, it's time to bring his stubborn ass home… I've just no clue where to find him." Sam replied.

"The same could be said about you, Mr. Hanna" Hetty stated, taking them all by surprise with her entrance into the conversation.

"Hetty." Sam started.

"Sam." Hetty returned in a similar tone, "It is time to make some decisions. Either you are coming back or you are not. This team has been fractured long enough in your absence."

"In my absence, Hetty? I think we all know it's been fractured a lot longer than that… ever since G…" Sam couldn't force himself to finish, "The fractured state of this team is certainly my fault but not because of taking this leave…" Sam admitted honestly.

"You aren't alone in that blame. We all played a part." Kensi stated.

"I didn't" Deeks shrugged at the looks he received," What? I'm just saying…"

"Be that as it may, Mr. Hanna. Agent Callen is a big boy and he made his choices… and now you need to make yours. I need to know, do I or do I not need to begin searching for a replacement?" Hetty asked.

Kensi and Deeks looked at each other, their breaths held as they waited…

Anna, who had been listening quietly from her desk couldn't believe this was where they were at. Callen threatening to jump back into the dark abyss that was the Blackguard… and Sam… would he even come back? If he didn't, would Kensi and Deeks be next? Her own future was up in the air as she awaited word on a job with ATF.

"I don't know, Hetty." Sam answered, "I need more time. I need to speak to G."

"Soon, Agent Hanna, before I am forced to make that decision for you." came her reply.

"Soon, I will let you know soon." Sam assured her.

"Very well. Until then, we have work to do people. I believe Eric has a case for you in Ops." Hetty pointed toward the stairs as she turned to leave.

Just as they started for the steps, having said their good byes to Sam, they met a confused Eric who was standing on the stairs landing prepared to whistle.

"Hetty" Kensi said, patting his shoulder, sympathetically, as they passed.

"Of course," he muttered dejectedly.

NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA

The last few days had found Callen doing some soul searching. He was forced to consider Gibbs's words. He did miss something about his time at the OSP. He just wasn't sure what THAT was. Was it having the added technology at his fingertips? Was it because it was a job he actually liked or was it this team? A team that was put together for him to lead… the idea that he was wanted. Oh, he'd always been wanted, but mostly for his abilities and not himself, as a person… just the agent... always the agent. This time… this time it had been different. They wanted both… the agent and the man. They created a team built around strengths that he would enhance through his leadership. A team that would, in return, treat him like family. It had scared him at first because no one ever wanted him, not really. Nothing ever came easily for him. He knew it was too good to be true… yet still, he accepted the offer… if not hesitantly. Over time he had begun to relax… to believe. Though he never truly let his guard down, he found himself almost trusting these people who called themselves his family… when in truth, he had none.

Shaking his thoughts free of the memories, Callen stared out at the horizon. He knew it was too good to be true and he had been right.

"Well, well, look who is here."

Callen spun to face the intruder, gun raised and ready, "What the hell are you doing here, Arkady."

"It is a public beach." Arkady chuckled as he ordered his guards to lower their weapons, "Come now, we are all friends here… no need for guns today."

"You sure about that, Arkady?" Callen replied causing the Russian to quirk an eyebrow in question.

"Now, now… my doctor, he says I need to walk more. Says it's good for the heart. I say not so good for knees, yeah? So, I remember my good friend, G Callen, always liked the beach. So here we are and look who I find? It is a good thing! It has been a long time, my friend. You look well… tired, but well. Retirement agrees with you."

"I'm not retired…" Callen returned his gun to its holster and his sites to the horizon.

"You have not returned to your Renegades, surely…" when Callen shot him a look of warning, Arkady raised his hands in surrender and slowly blew air out between his tongue and teeth. The sound always annoyed Callen and he knew it.

"What? Why are you still here? I thought the doctor told you to walk." Callen bit out. He seethed inside. The last thing he wanted to do right now was deal with Arkady and the information Owen Granger had given him…

"Whaaaaat, I can't take a moment to chat with friend from the old days?" Arkady replied watching Callen carefully. When Callen jammed his hands in his jacket pockets, refusing to acknowledge him, he changed tactics.

"I was little surprised when you hadn't stopped by for a visit before leaving town. I had heard Assistant Director Granger left you a going away gift…"

"Going away gift? He didn't go on a cruise, Arkady… the man was dying… speaking of, heard from Garrison lately?" Callen asked.

Arkady stepped up next to Callen, "No, I have not. My contacts have been looking but have found nothing. I am sorry, old friend."

"Don't be. You can stop looking on my account. I don't care."

"Harsh words which I do not think you mean. Your father cares for you and your sister, Alexandra. He wants only to keep you both safe." Arkady explained.

Callen looked to the sand at his feet in an attempt to buy time as he tried to bottle up the emotion that surfaced any time the subject of discussion was his father. "Yeah, well when you find him? Tell him to just stay away. We're better off without him."

"Callen…"

"And you! Why don't you call me by my given name? After all, you've known it far longer than I have." Callen threw back.

"Very well, Grisha."

"No, you know what? Don't bother. That's not who I am… not since I was five years old. You all robbed me of that! How many other secrets have you kept… you, Hetty, Garrison, and Granger! How many, Arkady!" Callen yelled, no longer able to hold back.

"It was for your safety…. Only for your safety." Arkady offered.

"And Amy? Why did you allow her to keep her name? What, she wasn't important enough to save?" he accused.

"You had stopped speaking after your mother's death." Arkady began, unprepared for the wrath of the man in front of him.

"Murder, you mean! Right? My mother was murdered!" Callen growled.

"Yes, yeeeesssss… murdered. We were unaware that you had blocked not only the events of that day but also your past in its entirety. Once it became known, it was decided it was for the best."

"Who decided? Who, Arkady?" Callen demanded.

"It served no purpose to remind you. Your life was difficult enough and our contact with you was… limited."

"Who! Who decided I should be kept in the dark about MY past?" Callen demanded yet again.

"It was a decision made… collectively." Arkady answered.

"You had NO RIGHT!" Callen spat. "You know what? You should follow your doctor's orders… get walking. It's the best thing for your health right now."

Arkady shook his head, "I am sorry, old friend… for the pain you suffer not knowing your past, but I will not apologize for keeping you safe all these years. We made promise to your parents to keep you safe. Not unlike the promise you made Michelle Hanna, no? We failed your sister, Amy, and you will never know how sorry I am. It is a regret I will take to my grave. My only regrets on that day will be over you, Grisha Aleksandrovich Nicolaev Callen." With that he waved his men ahead and began walking away before stopping briefly to turn back, "For someone with no family history, you certainly have a lot of people who worry about you, fight for you, who have died for you… You are alone… only because you CHOOSE to be." Shaking his head, Arkady turned to leave.

"This conversation isn't over, Kolchek!" he yelled before lowering his voice to a mere hiss, "Not by a LONG SHOT!"

"You know where to find me and you know how to get in… yes?" the old Russian threw back over his shoulder, chuckling with a wave of his hand.

Callen watched the man for only a moment before taking a deep breath of the salty air and letting it back out slowly. He returned his attention to the waves in an effort to control his breathing and slow his heart.

His attention was quickly and grudgingly drawn to his phone.

"Kamran… everything okay?" Callen asked guardedly.

"Hi, Uncle Callen. I'm fine. I just miss you."

"I miss you too… you back at school?"

"Yep, a few weeks now… How come you didn't come see us?" Kamran asked sadly.

"Sorry kiddo… just thought it was a bad idea over the holidays. I didn't want to upset everyone and ruin your Christmas break."

"Really, Uncle Callen? All they did was talk about the old days and how they wished you were there."

"They did", Callen stated skeptically.

"Yeah. They didn't know, but Aiden and I were listening."

"Do they not pay any attention to what you two are up to?" Callen asked.

"We aren't babies." She answered sharply, making Callen chuckle.

"No, no you are not babies."

"Dad won't go back to work…" she continued.

"He's decided not to go back then?" Callen was kind of surprised by this piece of information. He had always figured that Sam would pull himself back together and go back to leading the team the way he knew he could.

"Not exactly. Please go back to work for Miss Hetty…"

"Kamran…" Callen struggled… he hated disappointing her. He just didn't know if he could do what she asked.

"If you go back, then maybe dad will. He liked working with you. Didn't you?" she asked.

"At one time, yes, I guess." He answered carefully.

"Don't you like my dad anymore?" she pushed.

"It's not that simple, Kam."

"Daddy needs you! They all do!" Kamran cried desperately, "You promised you'd help him if he needed it."

"I said, if I could. I'm not sure I can. It's more complicated than you realize." Callen tried to explain to the young girl.

"No, it's not. The only one still mad is you, Uncle Callen. I have to go…"

Before Callen could respond, Kamran had disconnected the call, leaving him more conflicted than ever.

She put her phone back in her pocket and turned around, "Well?"


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER** **: Sigh! Nope, they aren't mine. Never have been... never will be... I merely borrow them for just a fraction of time before handing them back... unharmed... just as I found them.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTES** **: Thank you once again for taking the time to read and for the view that do... review. I appreciate it more than you realize. I love that you feel comfortable to discuss the possibilities of what is happening and what might be coming. I think on them and consider them for the present story as well as use in future stories. I don't know about you, but I'm not overly thrilled with the latest episodes. Sad really. Thankfully we can come here and find what we look for in the actual series yet never seem to find... at least lately. Well, here we are, chapter four. We have a very long road ahead but it's going to start getting interesting now. Sit back and enjoy! Let me know what your thoughts are. If you need to criticize, please keep it constructive.**

She put her phone back in her pocket and turned around, "Well?"

"You were great, Sis!" Aiden smiled. "Now, we wait to see if it works. Remember, don't tell anyone. This is just between us."

"Right" Kamran returned with a smile and a nod.

NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA

Callen couldn't get his conversation with Kamran off his mind. Why did everything have to be so hard. He was thankful that Sam's kids were blessed with a real childhood. Callen could never remember a time when he trusted so freely as Kamran did. He certainly never had so many people to turn to. Kamran had lost her mom, something they had in common. Luckily, the only thing they shared in common. She still had her dad and despite the issues that remained between them, he knew Sam was a great dad. She also had Kensi and Nell to help with girl stuff. Eric was tenderhearted and smart. He was ideal for tutoring or just hanging out with. Deeks… well, Deeks was perfect comic relief when life got too serious and he had a tender side that kids were drawn to. Even Hetty had a part. She was the grandmother of the group. Though he would never say it out loud to her face. He never was sure as to why Kamran seemed so taken with him. What did he have to offer? At best, he was a protector, but then look at the horror he brought into her life with Iosif? She could have died and it was all his fault. Why did Michelle make HIM promise? Why not Deeks and Kensi? Any of them would be better for the kids than he was.

What he really wanted was to leave… leave and just never come back. Maybe he didn't need to know the answers. He'd lived this long without them. Hell, he'd learned to live without a name. But, just as quickly as the thought entered his mind, it fled. Because he knew… his need for the truth was too strong and he deserved to know who he was… to know his past. To know where he came from.

Before he could decide his future, he needed more answers. Answers only one person could give… Henrietta Lange…

NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA-NCIS LA

"Mr. Callen, I wasn't expecting to find you here… though I must tell you, it is a pleasant surprise." Hetty stated as she hung her purse on its peg and set her briefcase on her desk.

Callen watched quietly as Hetty busied herself making tea. She was so methodical. Hetty loved her tea and it showed in the taste. She was the very reason he drank tea… He missed their conversations over a good cup. "So, Hetty, you sure you are happy I'm here?"

"Yes, Mr. Callen, why would you believe it any other way?" she asked calmly.

"Oh, I don't know. Before I left here, I told you that you had things to answer for. I have come to collect." Callen replied with equal calmness.

"I see. So, this is what brought you here today. I HAD hoped you had decided to rejoin your team."

"What team would that be, Hetty. From what I hear, there isn't much of one left. Has Sam returned?" Callen asked.

"No, no he hasn't and it does concern me. Perhaps, Mr. Callen, if you were to return…"

"I'm not here to discuss my career choices." Callen stated coldly.

"Well then… perhaps we need something a bit stronger than tea." Hetty pulled out two tumblers and a bottle of scotch from the bottom drawer of her desk.

"It's 8 a.m., Hetty." Callen remarked with a brow raised in question.

"Yes, it is. But as the saying goes, 'It's 5 o'clock somewhere', eh, Mr. Callen?" she replied cheekily.

She was rewarded with a half smirk as she poured their drinks. She was thankful to find him calm as she thought back to the evening prior when Arkady Kolchek paid her a visit.

********* 12 hours earlier*********

"It has come, Henrietta." Arkady stated cryptically.

"What, pray tell, are you referring to, Arkady?" Hetty answered, stepping back to allow him entrance.

"Den' rasplaty" (day of reckoning) he muttered as he walked into the foyer of her Dovecote residence. She'd taken to staying there more frequently in hopes her boy would find his way home. He knew where several of her homes were but this home was HIS home.

"I see. So, the time has come. Well, it was inevitable… though I had hoped…" Hetty began.

"I warned you, Henrietta, I warned you all… The boy had a right to know who he was, where from he comes. He should have at least been given his name." Arkady growled.

"And you know why we chose not to." Hetty's voice was matter of fact and it irked the old Russian. "As a child, yes. But the choice to continue was yours, Hetty… and now we are all in his crosshairs. This is not a good place to be, as you well know."

"What good would it have done? You know how headstrong he was. He would have gotten himself killed." She reasoned.

"You didn't think he had a right to know his own name? What about the fact that he was born into a family blood feud he had no part in and yet was on someone's death list. Then there are all the other many enemies he was born into because of the sins of his parents. Henrietta, he hasn't been a helpless child for many years. He should have been told! We are not growing younger. He needs to know so he can be prepared!"

"Well, I guess you are getting your wish then, Mr. Kolchek" Hetty replied, troubled.

"This does not bring me joy, Henrietta. We run the risk now of alienating him for good."

"Yes, there is that… Pravda Vyydet."

***********PRESENT**********

"What was that?" Callen asked.

"Pravda Vyydet" she repeated.

"Truth will out" he translated.

"Yes," she handed him his drink.

Despite the early hour, he took a sip and allowed the liquid to slide down his throat as he considered his questions.

"So, where do you want to begin?" Hetty asked simply.

"Let's start with why you lied about knowing each other and my father."

"Well, you've always known Owen and I knew each other."

"I'm not playing this game with you, Hetty. You said you didn't know who my father was. You acted as if you had only heard of Arkady Kolchek. Lies! Hetty."

"Firstly, Mr. Callen, what was done was done for your protection. It was not a choice we wanted to make."

"I don't really care. I want the truth, NOW" Callen's voice brooked no argument.

"It's no secret that the Comescus were after you from the beginning. As I told you once before, you came from a long family history of Government Agents. Very talented agents by all accounts. With that comes enemies… You know that all too well, I'm afraid… and in your case generations worth of enemies. When Amy, then you were born, your parents became concerned. Their enemies were circling. Your father found himself no longer able to keep you safe. For your safety, he had to leave and attempt to distract his enemies from finding out about you two. Your mother could not do it alone once the Comescus found her. We still aren't sure how that happened. Your parents didn't want this life for their children. It was just too dangerous. Allowing you to follow in their footsteps combined with this family blood feud assured the chances you would never live to see old age… if adulthood. Yes, Owen and I knew your parents… and through your father… Arkady Kolchek, and Michael Reinhardt… and there were others. But we did NOT know of the existence of you and Amy until Clara contacted us, asking for help."

"You say there were others, who?" Callen asked, intrigued.

"Admiral A.J. Chegwidden for one. Most are dead now. Those who live have asked to remain anonymous at this point… until… when and if they are needed."

"Why? Why me? Why were Amy and I so… special?" Callen nearly choked on the last word. He never felt special… now being no different.

"Because of your family. Your father was quite the agent back in the day… still is. When Clara went missing there was a question of who flipped who. Then we found out the work he was doing with Arkady."

"That I know." Callen commented, taking another sip and savoring the flavor. Hetty always appreciated the way he truly savored the taste of her finest beverages.

"What is it you want me to tell you, Mr. Callen. Even with what we knew… there was only so much we could tell. Your parents loved you."

Callen shifted in his chair and again took a sip of the offered drink. He didn't need to look in order to know they were no longer alone. The team was in the bullpen… the building was buzzing with activity. He needed to go soon.

"Why didn't you save her? Why didn't you go? You knew she would die that day. By not going, you were signing her death warrant and possibly mine and Amy's as well! Why, Hetty? It's not like you were ever a stickler for the rules. And why Amy… Why didn't you protect her? Save her?! Why not change her name? Move HER 37 times… or was that particular bit of hell saved just for me? Thirty-seven homes! Thirty-seven, Hetty! With just a very few worth mentioning… You saved me from the Comescus so that I could be tortured in those homes! The few worth staying in ended up abandoning me within days… except the Rostoff's. They were going to adopt me and then just like that it was over. Why? I know you blame the Comescus… but there's more to it than that. Why was I put in that position to begin with? Do you know what they did to me in those places? Did you even care? You tell me all these people were put in place to watch over me and yet…" Callen stopped and leaned back in his seat taking a swig from his tumbler, no longer tasting the amber liquid.

*************** BULLPEN **************

"What the heck is going on over there?" Deeks asked.

"Don't know. They were both here already when Eric and I arrived. They've been talking well over an hour." Nell replied.

"Well, it can't be good if they've pulled out the scotch this early…"

"SAM! You made it." Kensi greeted, having called him shortly after they got there.

"Figure out what's going on? he asked leaning against his old desk with his arms crossed.

"No, but it's intense whatever it is…"

"With those two? When isn't it?" Deeks asked.

"Where's Anna?"

"She's on a joint case with ATF… I think she's looking to move on. We need you back."

"I don't know, I don't think I'm the one to lead. We need Callen back. This team worked because we all worked together.

"You think he'll come back?" Kensi asked hopefully, looking back over her shoulder.

"I don't know, Kens." Sam sighed.

******* Hetty's Office *********

Hetty leaned forward, "Callen, I can only say I'm sorry. We made mistakes… many mistakes. We promised your mother to keep you safe. We underestimated the Comescus where your sister was concerned."

"Amy. Her name was Amy."

"Owen was in charge of Amy's safety…by the time he got there it was too late. We were all devastated. We doubled down on your watch… until we were cut off. Arkady couldn't get close to you. Garrison was gone and thought to be dead. Michael Reinhardt had been the last to be in contact with him and was charged with following you. Our hands were tied. Owen, AJ, and myself were put on one mission after another. Eventually I had garnered enough favors till I could pull a few strings. We had gotten intel that there was a Raven and Swan program here in the states only much more sinister. If they weren't orphans, they were made orphans so they were easily accessible. You were beyond our reach. So, we saved all that we could.

"Renko? Grace? Hunter?" Callen's voice was tight.

"To name a few. We tried to protect you. I wanted to get you away from them… Every time we got close, they moved you."

"They, them… Who?" Callen's frustration began to surface.

"We didn't know then and we don't know now." Hetty answered regretfully.

"So, you're telling me that's all you have? Why keep it a secret. We spoke of Ravens and Swans before and you said you were not a part of that… yet there is Renko! Grace! Hunter! Your perfect little soldiers… all dead!"

"No, Mr. Callen. They died doing a job they believed in. A job they were born to do. When is the last time you felt good about the work you do?" Hetty asked.

"You know more than you let on. What? What aren't you telling me?" Callen asked lowly.

I know nothing more… I have just as many questions as you, dear boy."

"You lie. You knew me almost from birth, all of you! You worked with me, preached all about trust and yet you were all lying to me the whole time." Callen tensed as the anger and resentment bubbled to the surface.

"Mr. Callen, it was not done to hurt you. Quite the opposite. You have no idea how it pained me to keep your name from you… to not be able to share with you your family's story. How I wished I could have kept you and your sister together. The decision wasn't mine to make. It was only when you got yourself into trouble with the law that they allowed me to take you in but it was highly controlled and as you know, they kept me away on missions in an effort to control my influence over you…"

"Who! You keep saying they… you keep shifting the blame then tell me you don't know." Callen demanded.

"You know as well as I do that there are many factions within the CIA. It was above my paygrade." Hetty explained.

"But you have an idea, don't you?" Callen challenged.

"I have suspicions, but until I've done more searching, I have nothing to share. I'm sorry but I can't have you run head long into danger without reason." Hetty replied.

"Right. I should have known better than to think you would be honest with me." Callen finished his drink and set it none too delicately on the desk before standing and turning to leave.

Halfway across the courtyard Hetty called out in an effort to stop him, "Grisha!"

It did indeed stop him. Callen halted his steps and all fell silent until he turned to face her once more, "Don't. Don't you ever call me that. You don't GET to call me that. As I have already told Arkady, you have all robbed me of my very identity my whole life. Grisha Aleksandrovich Nikolaev means nothing to me! He doesn't exist but in the memories of a mother whom you allowed to be murdered!" Callen almost reveled in the knowledge that what he said would hurt her… almost… and by the look on her face… he had done just that.

Callen looked her in the eye and saw the hurt and for the briefest of moments his resolve waivered but just as quickly the shutters clamored into place and his stare hardened, his shoulders squared, his hands fisted and Callen, Blackguard's Renegade stood before her. Turning he strode past the bullpen only barely acknowledging Sam's presence.

Sam had learned his lesson, this wasn't the Callen to mess with. Instead he turned his attention, along with the others towards Hetty. In that moment she had aged. She looked tired and scared. That in itself was unnerving. He stepped forward to go to her but she simply put her hand up and shook her head… leaving the team shaking their own, lost as to what they should do.


	5. Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER** **: I do not own and of the characters of NCIS LA. I am merely borrowing them but for a small while.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Thank you to all those who took the time to read… I hope you are enjoying it. Thought I would post another chapter… not sure I will continue to post daily or not from this point. I look forward to hearing from you. Have a wonderful day.**

"What just happened?" Deeks asked.

"Wish I knew." Kensi replied.

"Don't suppose you know where to find him?" Sam turned to look up at Eric and Nell on the balcony.

"Afraid not, I run Kaleidoscope nonstop for him and he never shows up, NOT ONCE! He seems to know where every camera is." Eric replied.

"Great", Sam sighed.

"Have you thought to check out your old hangouts?" Nell offered, "Callen is all alone and dealing with a lot from the sounds of it. You guys were his safety net for a long time. Callen may approach a lot of things differently but he still tends to have places where he feels safest or at the very least comforted…"

Sam, Deeks and Kensi shared a look before, "She has a point, Sam." Kensi stated.

"Look at you being all geniusy... Nelly girl!", Deeks stated with a smile.

Giving Deeks a skeptical look, "Firstly, geniousy is not an actual word and secondly, we can call you if anything comes up… you know, IF you need to go someplace. Now, about that name…" Nell replied raising her brows at Deeks, grinning as she and Eric turned to go back into Ops.

"So where do we start?" Sam asked.

The answer came in unison, "The beach".

NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA

Callen headed for the one place that always allowed him anonymity. Venice Beach, the boardwalk. Once there, he donned his ballcap and sunglasses and began walking, ever vigilant to his surroundings. His nerves began to settle when he took out his phone.

"Eric?"

"Callen?" Eric returned quietly.

"Why are you whispering?"

"Because I don't want anyone to hear." Came the cryptic reply.

"Why? Hear what, Eric?" Callen repeated.

"I received a message for you. I didn't think you'd want anyone else seeing it."

"Okay, Who's it from?" Callen asked.

"Joelle Taylor" Eric said quietly, waiting for a response that didn't come, "uhm, Callen?"

"Send it to my phone," he growled, "and Eric… make it disappear. I mean gone… do we understand each other?"

Eric was quick to send the message as he replied, "you should be receiving it now."

"I got it. You know what to do." Callen warned.

"Okay, message has been deleted… completely… but Callen, Joelle… she's…"

"Dead, Eric. She's dead, which is why this never happened, do you hear me?" Callen threatened.

"Right, no, I get it." Eric responded nervously.

"…and Eric?"

"Yeah, Callen?"

"Thanks", and with that he hung up.

Wandering aimlessly, Callen found himself on the beach. Finally, he looked at the message.

"Be careful, Callen. Think about what you are asking. You are asking why without considering the who. The enemy isn't always so obvious. When your instinct is to go it alone, think again Callen… and be safe. Your enemies are closer than you think and not whom you suspect. Be on your Guard."

Shoving the phone into his back pocket he tensed, suddenly on alert, his hand reached for his gun.

"At ease man, it's just us." Sam called out also reaching for his gun, uncertain of the response he might get not realizing Kensi and Deeks already had theirs drawn. Callen slowly turned to face his visitors. His eyes were guarded… his voice menacing.

"Why are you here?" Callen asked, unbothered by the raised guns.

"Looking for you." Sam stated with a shrug. Thought maybe you could use a friend or two or three to talk to."

"Friends?" Callen scoffed, raising a brow in question. "Too rich for my blood."

"What happened back there, Callen?" Kensi asked. He could hear the concern in her voice, see it in her eyes.

"Nothing new. Just Hetty being Hetty" he responded.

"Seemed a touch more than that" Deeks stated, eyebrows raised.

"And if I said it was none of your business?"

"We would disagree." Sam replied simply.

"Of course, you would." Callen began walking slowly. A part of him was wanting to leave them behind but there was also a part of him… a part that he kept in lock down, that longed for the days when he could tell them something and know they had his back, no questions asked.

"G, you can't keep going like this. You will implode." Sam stated sternly.

"Really Sam? You think you are qualified to tell me what I can handle? That the three of you have even a clue as to who I am?" Callen growled, turning to face the ocean. His voice softened and his next words were nearly missed, caught on the breeze, "Hell, even I don't know anymore."

Her heart ached. Callen was someone she had admired from afar while at FLETC… even though there were those who claimed he was nothing more than a myth. "Callen, I know you. You are one of the strongest men I know. You taught me everything I needed in order to do this job. You are kind and patient. You feel things deeply which is why you make such a great agent." She stated quietly.

Callen looked down for a moment then shook his head. He refused to look at her… "See, that right there proves my point. I can't be this person you speak of having done all the things that I have done."

"I'm not talking about that Callen. I'm talking about the one who stood up to the bullies to keep the other kids safe in the foster homes and orphanages. The one who climbed into a water storage tank to help a little boy caught up in a mean and unforgiving world. The one willing to risk his life till he knew that little boy was safe. The one who helped a kid adjust to a new life when his father died trying to take so many others. You could have given up on me so many times but you fought for me… took time… and when I was in rehab trying to learn to walk again… to live again. When I was mad at everyone and everything… when I had pushed Marty away… I never woke up where you weren't there in case I needed help. I saw you watching from afar during therapy… just as you have done for each and every one of us… Hetty included."

She watched him as his demeanor darkened at the mere mention of Hetty's name, "You have a good heart and soul", she continued, trying to regain the ground she had just lost.

Callen laughed but it was a cold and humorless one. This time he did turn to face her, "Where have you been the past four years? That person doesn't exist anymore than the Grisha Henrietta Lange called out for. Grisha was a five-year-old boy who should have died on that beach next to his mother. In fact, perhaps he did. The Callen you are clinging to never really existed. He's a legend, a myth, an alias no different from all the rest. A good heart and soul? Not with the amount of blood on these hands. You, Kensi… you have a good heart. You need to find yourself someone better qualified of your praise to look up to. Me? I'm just a figment of the governments imagination."

"Callen, it's not true. If that person no longer existed then who was it that kept watch over our wedding to make sure we were safe?" Marty asked, taking Kensi and Sam both by surprise.

"You… you were here? You came to our wedding?" Kensi asked, eyes glistening with unshed tears. "Callen, I… WE missed you so much that day. I wanted you there so badly."

"You are a protector, G. It's what you do… it's who you are." Sam stated.

"I believe the word you are actually looking for is 'monster', Sam. Isn't that what you called me? A monster?"

"I was wrong. I was angry, G! Angry at everyone, including myself… and Michelle… for dying and leaving me and the kids… and I WAS angry at you. First because the great G Callen, for all the lives he saved for all the hurdles you maneuvered in order to rescue others couldn't save the one person I needed… loved most… and then because you gave up and left… not just me or the team… but my kids, G, MY KIDS! They'd lost their mother and then the person they cherished and trusted to be there… YOU! They lost you. I was mad, G. I am sorry, because I had no right to be… you stepped up and stood by us from the moment she died. I know you did your best to find her. I know you promised to watch over the kids and me and you kept your word. You're no monster, G."

"Come on, Sam, let's be honest… even I'm not so sure about that. Not all that long ago I was the very reason your daughter needed saving."

"You were just as much a victim as she was. I spoke out of fear." Sam argued.

"You spoke from your heart. That's usually a good predictor of truth. I'm a cold bastard, a monster who put your baby girl in danger, who put all those other kids in danger… Isobel, Daniel, Dorin, Nadir, Michael and Kamran! No, I think you were pretty spot on with your judgement, Sam" Callen replied.

"You kept Michael safe, Nadir is finally learning what having a family is all about and you saved Dorin and gave him a new life… one without all this. And No, you couldn't save Daniel and Isobel but that's not on you. Yes, I know you still check-up on Alex to see how he is doing in the system from time to time. When it comes to my baby girl… you saved her more than once that day. You brought her home like you promised me… like you promised Michelle… to the point of nearly losing your own life… I don't think I ever thank you… so, Thank you."

Callen turned to look at Sam square on and while his body remained tense and alert and his facial features schooled… it was his eyes that betrayed the emotions swirling within. Crystal blue and full of pain… he swallowed against the lump in his throat as his teeth chewed on his inner cheek. His eyes narrowed then, shutters falling into place… his voice demanding.

"Why, why are you here? What do you want from me?"

"We want you to come back." Deeks replied simply, "Anna is transferring to ATF and well, we just want you to come back."

"Anna left?" Callen asked, suddenly caught off guard.

"Yeah, she's on a joint mission with ATF now but she is staying with them when this mission ends." Kensi explained.

"Hetty wants me back…" Sam stated, drawing his attention to the matter at hand.

"That's good, I think you should." Callen answered.

"Not without my partner." He stated looking Callen in the eye.

Callen returned the look, disbelieving.

"This is your team to lead, G. You need to come back and lead it," Sam challenged.

"Sam…"

"I know, you don't trust us… we get that. You have every reason to question our loyalty."

"This isn't the first conversation like this we have had and yet here we are… and even if I did come back… I don't trust HER…" Callen stated in reference to their leader.

"G, you aren't the only one who has been forced into untenable situations…" Sam replied.

Callen shot him a hardened look and Sam raised his hands in surrender, "Look, I'm just saying that perhaps you shouldn't be so quick to write her off."

No one missed the emphasis on the word 'if' in regards to trust. It would be an ongoing struggle in reconnecting with him. They knew this going in.

"Callen, I know trust is not a word you have much use for… and I get it, I do. I was the same way until I met you two. You may not trust us but I trust you… any day of the week." Deeks stated earnestly.

Sam could see the need for escape filling Callen's visage, "Look… come Monday, I'm heading in to talk with Hetty. If I'm to stay, I better see your sorry ass there. I NEED to see you there."

With those words, Sam walked away followed by Deeks and then Kensi but not before she tried once more to reach him. "Please, Callen, think about what we've said. Just… whatever you do… don't go back to Blackguard. You aren't safe there and I don't want anything to happen to you. I can't imagine my world without you in it." Kensi brushed her hand along his forearm before leaving him standing watching the ebb and flow of the water's edge.


	6. Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER** **: Let's just get this out of the way… No, None of the NCIS, NCIS LA, or Leverage teams belong to me. I'm sad and I feel it's a stab in the heart every time I have to say this… but there it is… moving on…**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: I can't thank you all enough for the wonderful reviews. These stories are a labor of love. Your reviews are an inspiration to keep writing… So, thank you. Just a reminder to anyone just "tuning in"… There are three stories leading up to this one here that will explain A WHOLE LOT as to what is going on at this moment in time. Character development leading up to all this actually started with my very first story, "G Callen Doesn't Do Christmas". The three that will get you caught up for the moment are as follows: "On the Other Side of Fear Lies Freedom", "The G Callen Job", and "A Time to Remember". Be sure to drop a review if you read any of them, I would love to hear from you. Now… back to the story.**

His head was beginning to pound from the stress of the day. He needed a break, but the buzz of his phone told him that would be unlikely.

"Gibbs, to what do I owe the pleasure." Callen answered.

"Checking to see how you are doing." Gibbs grumbled across the line.

"I'm fine." Callen stated plainly… as if that simple answer was really all the man wanted.

"Yeah, sure you are. When is the last time you ate or slept? You even have a place to stay?"

Callen sighed heavily, "Seriously Gibbs, you're not my mother. Who have you been talking to this time?"

"You, you stubborn ass. I'm in town. I took some time off."

"Why?" Callen asked guardedly.

"Because I thought we'd finally have a sitrep in a bar."

"You should have checked first. It's not a good time, sorry." Callen stated tensely.

"Callen, you hang up and I will find you." Gibbs growled, "Now, I have a stop to make… got some place we can meet for dinner?"

Gibbs heard the expected sigh of frustration and knew he had won this round, "Fine. Patrick's Roadhouse. You can get a steak AND a beer.

"I'm buying, be prepared to eat." Gibbs stated.

"Damn straight you are. 5:00?" Callen retorted.

"That should do it."

Callen disconnected the call without another word. "Damn it" he mumbled working his way down the beach back toward the boardwalk.

NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA

"Jethro, welcome"

"Henrietta"

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" Hetty asked.

"I think you can guess," Gibbs stated, none to happily.

"Yes, I suppose I can… and pray tell, which one called you?" Hetty asked curiously.

"Aiden Hanna. He called Ziva… said Callen was saying he was leaving again and he was worried for his sister's sake. For Callen to be leaving those kids means only one thing…" Gibbs explained.

"Blackguard," Hetty replied, "Well, they never did find Iosif… it doesn't surprise me that he would go back with the thoughts of being able to take that monster out."

"What is going on here? You told Leon that you asked Callen to come back. I was working on getting him to accept, what happened?" he demanded.

"I'm afraid things became much more complicated." Hetty explained.

"I'm guessing he decided to ask you outright." Gibbs grimaced.

"Yes"

"Did you answer or evade?" Gibbs asked.

"Both, I'm afraid. I answered what I could." Hetty's voice was strained.

"You and I both know there are many questions of Callen's past you will likely never answer." Gibbs stare bore into Hetty as she took a deep breath.

"There are just some things that serve no purpose in the telling. He's been hurt far too many times in this life. He doesn't need anymore."

"When are you going to learn. Callen will never stop looking, never stop asking until he learns all there is to know about his past. He deserves that much. The longer you insist on keeping these secrets, the less likely he will be to forgive you for keeping them in the first place. What could you possibly know that's worth risking your relationship?" Gibbs demanded.

"With any luck you will never need to find out." Hetty sighed.

"You hurt him and you WILL deal with ME, Henrietta." Gibbs growled.

"I would expect no less, Jethro. I assure you, it is far better he never knows it all."

"I hope you know what you are doing." Gibbs stated skeptically.

"No more so than I…"

'That kid is about to break. Four years of hell and then some. He goes back to that group and we may not get another chance."

"I am well aware, Agent Gibbs. If you have any ideas, I would very much like to hear them."

"You could start with telling him what he wants to know," Gibbs reiterated, "however, since that is obviously not going to happen… I'm meeting him for dinner and then try to make sure he finds somewhere for a decent night sleep for a change. I've no doubt he's out there floating around again."

Hetty opened her top right desk drawer which she kept locked with her numerous aliases and their credit cards and passports. She pulled out a set of keys and handed them to Gibbs, "Here"

"What's this?" he asked.

"I own a cottage on a quiet stretch of beach… I have nothing personal there and it is one Callen hasn't found as yet. Perhaps you can convince him to go there. Stay as long as you like. It will be fully stocked by the time you arrive." Hetty explained.

Holding up the keys, "You never cease to amaze me, Hetty. Thank you." Gibbs headed for the exit just as the team returned from working a mission.

"Gibbs! What brings you to town?" Deeks asked then followed up nervously as Gibbs just stared at him, "Never mind, I can guess."

"You seen him?" Gibbs asked.

"This morning… good luck man, he's on a thin line." Deeks replied.

"Great. Have a good weekend."

"Thanks, you too…" Kensi returned, "and seriously, good luck."

NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA - NCIS LA

Gibbs was surprised when he looked up to find Callen approaching his table, "You're late." He stated simply as he stood to shake his friend's hand.

"Had things to do… took longer than expected." Callen replied.

"What things?" Gibbs asked seriously.

"Where were you all afternoon?" Callen retorted.

"Fine. Don't tell me." Gibbs side stepped.

As they were finishing the last of their dinner, Gibbs decided to approach the subject of housing.

"You get your house back?" Gibbs asked.

"No, don't want it, don't need it. Besides, I wouldn't take it back from Kensi and Deeks even if I did. More of a home in their care than it ever was in mine, anyway."

"So where are you living these days?" he asked again.

"Here and there. Why so interested?" Callen's annoyance was obvious.

"Because you're staying with me this weekend. Got a beach house from a friend to use as long as I'm here."

"A friend? Really?" Callen narrowed his eyes questioningly.

"Yes, Callen, Really. Now get your butt in gear and let's go."

"Don't need charity and I don't make for good company. You know that." Callen threw back, making no effort to move through the remainder of his meal quickly.

"Finish your meal… and then, we are going to go check this place out. I will survive your poor sleeping habits. You telling me you've lost interest in the beach?" Gibbs asked watching him push the food around on his plate.

"No, I'm telling you, you don't want me as a guest." Callen repeated.

"Why? Because of the nightmares… or the fact you don't sleep BECAUSE of the nightmares?" Gibbs asked.

"Fine. Let's go." He grumbled, unwilling to answer.

The drive to the beach house was a quiet one. Callen sat looking out the passenger window or staring at the phone screen.

"Everything okay?" Gibbs asked.

"Peachy, why?" he asked in answer.

"You've been staring at your phone for the past 15 minutes."

Callen immediately tucked the phone into his pocket and turned to look out the side window.

"Okay…" Gibbs remarked when Callen didn't answer.

"Why are you here, Gibbs? Who called you in? Why is everyone all of the sudden interested in how I'm doing?" Callen asked, not bothering to look at the man.

"First of all, Aiden Hanna called me. He mentioned you might be leaving again and his sister is upset at the thoughts of your not being here... Secondly, all of a sudden, Callen? Hardly. You've been avoiding calls from Ziva and Abby. The director of NCIS is still waiting for an answer from you regarding his job proposal and I KNOW you have Blackguard biting at your heels."

Callen didn't even try to hide the sigh that escaped his lips. He cast a quick glance at Gibbs then turned his gaze back to the side window.

"It's not all of a sudden, Callen. There are a lot of people who have been concerned for your safety over the past four years. Sam, Deeks, Kensi, even Hetty. They made big mistakes. They realize that and they want to try again. They want to make things right." Gibbs continued, knowing that while he chose to remain quiet he was still listening.

Callen refused to say anything more. He wasn't one for second chances when someone wronged him anymore than he believed in asking for a second chance when he screwed up. What happened four years ago with Deeks, was making it all the more difficult now. He didn't feel he deserved another chance. He was angry with Sam and Kensi but the more time that settled between them the more convinced he was that they were right. He put the job before his friends. All the more reason to cut his losses and move on because he didn't know how to do both. The realization that they hadn't truly trusted him still stung and he couldn't let that go either. He didn't know if he could trust them and he didn't know if they SHOULD trust him.

"Okay, Callen, we don't have to talk but you do need to figure a few things out." Gibbs stated as he pulled up to the beach cottage which was nothing short of a mansion. Gibbs just shook his head at how simple of a place Hetty had made it sound.

As promised, the kitchen was well stocked with all of Callen's favorite foods no doubt, as well as steak, which she knew Gibbs liked.

Callen said nothing as he grabbed a glass of water and walked out the back door onto the deck overlooking the ocean.

Deciding it best to leave him to his thoughts, Gibbs headed upstairs to find a room. Callen sat down on a step and listened to the sounds of the ocean lapping up onto the shore.

He thought about the conversation with the team earlier that day and about the fact the kids had called Gibbs to stop him from leaving and Kamran's plea to stay and return to work so Sam might follow… and Hetty… the hurt look on her face as he left.

Unable to sit still, he got to his feet and began walking to the beach. On his way, he pulled up Joelle's message for what felt like the hundredth time. She emphasized a few parts… "when his instincts say go alone… don't", "enemies are close and not whom he suspected", and "be on Guard." Guard… as in Blackguard? What enemies. His enemies were many… which ones?

Pulling his phone out and finding the number he needed, he waited.

"Yeah"

Callen chuckled at the grumbled response, "Eliot".

"Hey, Callen. Still pissing everyone off in LA?" returning the chuckle.

"No idea what you're talking about Spencer," Callen threw back.

"I bet. So, what's going on?" Eliot Spencer had known Callen for a long time. They'd met up during their time in the military and again while working black ops for "the agency". Callen never called just to chat.

"I'm not entirely sure," Callen admitted.

"So, you're still on the outs with the team? Thought you were headed back to clear things up."

"Time will tell. I haven't decided what I'm going to do yet. Right now, I have bigger fish to fry." Callen answered.

"Okay, what can I do?" Eliot asked. Callen seldom called in favors and rarer still were the times he asked for help on a personal mission.

"Actually… I need Hardison."

"Hardison?!" Eliot replied in surprise. "Don't you have your own resident genius?"

"Eric… yes. But there are too many prying eyes and nosey individuals. Until I know what's going on, they are better off not knowing."

"Fair enough. What do you need?" Eliot replied.

"Blackguard… I need him to look into their background."

"Why? I thought you were done there." Eliot was more than concerned. "They find out, we're looking into this, it isn't going to end well."

"Then I suggest we don't let them find out. If he can't handle it, tell me now. I'll do it myself. It would just be easier if..." Callen started.

"I didn't say he couldn't handle it… you know how I feel about them. After our time there… I still can't believe you went back to them." Eliot growled.

"Things happen," Callen mumbled, "Can he look into them discreetly or not?"

"Yes, I'll get back to you. Until then… you need to reconsider the team. I get you have trust issues considering… believe me… you remember how I was after… you were the one to find me. Trusting isn't easy. You would know better than most. You have to start somewhere… start with people you already know…"

"…yes, people I already know stabbed me in the back… excellent place to start. Right." Callen stated lowly.

"Look, I don't blame your being hesitant. It took me a long time to trust Nate and the team… but given the opportunity, they're good people. Give them a chance. I'm going to get a hold of Hardison and get back with you later. Think on it, Callen."

After the call disconnected, he looked at the message one more time. He knew Joelle, too, had been tied to the CIA and she was a part of the faction that had been hell bent on the undoing of the OSP. They never knew exactly why but the only reason she'd know anything about what he was doing now would be due to those ties. She obviously still had contacts. However, this message implied more than the information it gave.

He was really going out on a limb thinking her use of the word "guard" had anything to do with Blac kguard… Still, he had to start somewhere. He needed to find out what this vague warning was referring to and how it connected… if it connected… to his past. And what, if anything, did Blackguard have to do with it.

For now, all he could do was wait… wait and decide if going back to OSP was a smart move. Could he, should he trust them again?

With a tired sigh, Callen turned back to the house where, as he got closer, found Gibbs sitting on the deck. No doubt waiting for him.

"Figure anything out on your walk?" Gibbs handed him a beer.

Taking his first deep swig before answering, "Not really"

"I heard you hit Hetty pretty hard with the questions."

Callen worried the inside of his cheek as he regarded his friend before looking off with a smirk and taking a quick sip of his beer as he replied, "Figured that's where you went. So how did that go?"

"About how you would expect. Your… the team wants you back, that's obvious." Gibbs watched for any sign of a reaction but Callen turned to face the ocean.

"So, what's your plans for the weekend?" Callen asked in lieu of a response.

Gibbs chuckled at the expected change of subject, "don't know… you?"

"No plans… When do you have to head back?" Callen asked turning back.

"You trying to get rid of me?" Gibbs asked with brows raised in question.

"Would it matter?" Callen smirked. "How's Ziva and Abby?"

"They're good. Abby wanted to come but she had a case to work on. Ziva is worried about you, Callen."

"seems to me she has enough to contend with now that she's with Tony Dinozzo. Really Gibbs? I never thought I would see the day when you would bend one of your own rules… especially that one," Callen retorted, "and you can tell her she doesn't need to worry about me."

Gibbs smirk slid into a scowl at Callen's remark about Tony and Ziva. He wasn't exactly thrilled to hear the two of them were dating but he had to admit they brought the best out in each other. He was willing to admit that maybe they could make it work. Callen on the other hand was a constant strain on the nerves, "hmph, that could be argued… Four years in the wind and most of that with Blackguard. You and I both know what that job does to a person and you are no exception."

"My choice, Jethro. I'll live with the consequences."

"Every night? Nightmare by nightmare?" Gibbs asked.

"If it's a problem…"

"Stop it, Callen. You know it isn't."

Callen downed the last of his beer and said his goodnights before leaving Gibbs to his own thoughts.


	7. Chapter 7

**DISCLAIMER** **: Blah blah blah blah…. I don't own any of them… crap.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: This one is a bit smaller, yes. Perhaps, before nights end, I MIGHT be encouraged to add an extra chapter… Let me know your thoughts on the subject. 12**

 **Not much to say… so ENJOY!**

He had only been gone moments when Gibb's phone rang.

"Gibbs."

"Good evening Gibbs. I hate to bother you this late." Vance apologized.

"Then why are you?" Gibbs grumped.

"The Director of the CIA has encouraged me to retract any and all job offers that have been offered to Agent Callen. They do not appreciate the poaching of their best operative." Vance replied.

"You going to listen to them, Director?" Gibbs asked curiously.

"What do you think? He is calling me Monday, noon. Get him signed on there before then or I may have no choice. You and I both know it will be a mistake if he goes back."

"I'm trying, Leon. It would help if this team hadn't screwed things up so bad."

"Make it happen, Agent Gibbs. I don't like the undercurrent here. This isn't just about his excellent performance."

"On it, Director" Gibbs growled, clapping his phone shut as he turned toward the house. "Damn it, Callen… what now?"

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The morning found Gibbs standing on the beach with two cups of coffee as he watched Callen emerge from the water grabbing his towel and drying himself as he approached his friend.

"Morning Gibbs. One of those coffees mine or was the night that bad?" Callen smirked taking the offered cup gratefully.

"No, but from the sounds of it and the fact the day has barely started and you've already been swimming suggests yours was."

"Don't start, Jethro." Callen warned.

"Fine, but a decision needs to be made." Gibbs relented.

"What decision?" Callen asked skeptically.

"Grab a shower and I'll make some breakfast."

"Gibbs." Callen started.

"Callen. Shower then breakfast" Gibbs ordered, sighing with relief when Callen complied.

Gibbs had just finished bringing breakfast to the table when he felt more than heard the newcomer.

"Good morning, Henrietta"'

"Jethro."

"You hungry? You want some tea?"

"I've eaten, thank you but tea would be nice." Hetty responded, finding a seat at the table. "How are things with our boy?"

"I don't know, Hetty. I don't think he knows. He's dealing with something, I don't know what it is but my gut says it's not good."

Hetty took a thoughtful sip of her tea when Callen finally made his way into the kitchen.

"This is your house." He said more than asked.

"Yes," she replied.

Putting no further energy into the conversation, he went to get a cup of coffee.

"Mr. Callen… I am afraid I need an answer regarding your choice of employment.

"Why the rush?"

"Why the rush, Mr. Callen? I offered you the position months ago. I would say I've been quite patient." Hetty answered.

"Sit down and eat, then we can talk." When Callen made no move to join them, Gibbs tried again, "Food's getting cold. Sit… eat!"

Grudgingly, Callen made his way to the table accepting the plate Gibbs handed him loaded with scrambled eggs and bacon.

They ate in silence. Callen avoided the concerned stares aimed at him choosing to concentrate on his breakfast. A breakfast he had no interest in eating at this point.

"Mr. Hanna has agreed to return with the understanding you come back as well." Hetty offered.

Callen remained silent… lost in thought.

"Callen, they made mistakes. No one is asking you to just forget that but give them a chance to make things right." Gibbs suggested.

"Yeah, because that's always worked out for me." Callen mumbled.

"This is different… they want your trust and are willing to work for it." Hetty stated.

"Earn my trust? How do you intend to earn my trust when you're still keeping secrets?"

"I have told you all I can, Mr. Callen." Hetty replied quietly.

"You know as well as I do, not everything is as easy as 1,2,3. There are some things that are better left unsaid for your own safety." Gibbs stated.

Callen's eyes narrowed as he glared at Gibbs, "You telling me that you are a part of this? You keeping secrets now too, Gibbs?"

"You know me better than that. I'm saying the fact that you are alive today is a miracle and in no small part due to the woman in front of you." Gibbs voice was commanding.

"So, I'm just supposed to trust her blindly? After hiding my very identity from me my whole life?" Callen asked incredulously.

"I'm saying if I had to choose who to trust here… Hetty or the Agency… Blackguard in particular? My bets are on Hetty. I don't trust Blackguard… You can't keep doing that job. One day your luck is going to run out and no one will be there to save you." Gibbs replied.

"It's not necessarily a bad thing, maybe…" Callen stated wearily, walking to the window watching the waves crash into the shore.

"You honestly feel that way, Mr. Callen? You are so intent on being alone?"

"I'm just saying, I'm good at my job… relationships, not so much. What I do makes a difference for those who can live normal lives… If that means I die in the process, I'm okay with that." Callen explained honestly.

"Callen, you are NOT expendable! Do you hear me?! We've been friends for a long time. We're family. Abby is family… Ziva, Anna, Kamran, Aiden… they're family. Damn it, G. You matter! People are depending on you to stick around… to be a part of their lives…" Gibbs roared.

"FINE!" Callen yelled before softening his voice, still refusing to look at either of his companions, "fine… I'll stay. I will stay and lead this team." Callen then turned and his eyes went straight to Hetty, "But I will not answer to you. I work for Leon directly or I don't do this."

"So long as you understand your team is still answerable to me." Hetty replied calmly.

"Whatever secrets you're still holding onto, I will find out." Callen warned before walking out onto the deck, leaving them alone.

"I hope not, Mr. Callen" Hetty whispered.

"I hope it's worth it, Hetty. Your road is a whole lot tougher keeping these secrets."

"Time will tell. For now, he's home. Hopefully, fences will be mended before the truth comes out.

"I'm going to call Leon." Gibbs stated, stepping out of the room as Hetty stood watching her boy walking the beach.


	8. Chapter 8

**DISCLAIMER** **: As always, I have no personal claim to any of the characters of NCIS LA, NCIS, or Leverage.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTES** **: Hello, Thank you for the wonderful reviews. They made my day, you have no idea. I know I promised a second chapter yesterday… but I also asked for your input on the idea, :-P. I am going away for a couple days so I am not sure if I will be able to post… Enjoy this next chapter and don't panic, if I don't get one up tomorrow… it won't be too long.**

"Leon… Gibbs. Callen has accepted the OSP lead position with the understanding that you will be his direct superior."

Gibbs could hear the sigh of relief and again wondered why Callen insisted on living his life alone when so many people cared about what happened to him.

"I will let them know. I need you to…" Leon stopped mid-sentence as Gibbs interrupted.

"I'm not going anywhere, Leon. Although, he is only going to buy the vacation excuse for so long. He wasn't really convinced to begin with."

"I have been thinking about that. As yet, there has not been a replacement found for Owen Granger. It's going to take a special individual to deal with that group… for the time being, you will be the acting Assistant Director of the OSP. Stay in touch."

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When Callen finally returned to the cottage, he found a brief note with a set of car keys and a phone. Taking the tracking button out of the phone and leaving it on the counter, he went to gather his things. He needed time to think… some place… alone.

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"He left after you did. I was reading in the library and dozed off…. When I woke up, I found this on the counter." Gibbs stated, placing the tracking device on her desk.

"Bugger, should have known better." Hetty sighed.

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Callen knew every spare corner and hiding place within the OSP. If there were secret stairways and tunnels, he knew where. It offered him the ability to come and go without hassles. It allowed him the opportunity to perch somewhere quiet and collect his thoughts or watch his team. He was able to get a true sense of where their heads were and how they were handling things. It came in handy when Dom went missing and they found him only to lose him again. Today he was preparing for an event he never expected… his return as lead agent.

He watched as the building came to life. He'd been there since the day before after leaving the cottage.

He had watched as Hetty hung her purse on the customary peg with her jacket and then on to the business of making her pot of tea. Today he envisioned her beginning with a relaxing cup of Kava Kava, steeped with a pinch of organic cinnamon or perhaps she would choose Egyptian Licorice Mint. Her computer would be on and waiting by the time she returned with her tray. Then she would sit and consider the day ahead and ponder the week prior.

Before long he heard the approach of Kensi and Deeks. Just as they had done since the beginning of their partnership, they entered the building arguing over something trivial. He rolled his eyes as he listened. Some things never changed. He and Sam used to joke that it was like a mating ritual between the two.

He sobered as his sights settled on his desk. Anna had used it for the past four years. She had told him that she was merely keeping it warm until he, it's natural owner, returned. She was gone now. It was probably for the best but it made it no less painful.

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"Dare I ask, has anyone heard from G over the weekend" Callen heard Sam ask the others as he entered the bullpen and dropped his go bag by his desk. Looking at the others he answered his own question, "Yeah, I figured as much."

Just as he was preparing to get up and start his day, he caught sight of Gibbs at Hetty's desk. Eyes narrowed and brows furrowed as he watched the exchange, seeing him lay what he assumed was the tracking button on her desk. He saw the look of frustration and the shrug of Gibb's shoulders.

He watched as Eric and Nell joined the group in the bullpen welcoming Sam back into the fold. His chest tightened and a knot formed in the pit of his stomach. He had actually missed what he thought he'd had here at one time. The morning banter, knowing someone had your back, enjoying the job. Just as quickly the all too familiar itch of anger surfaced with the realization that while these people may all have that… he didn't and he wouldn't… couldn't. It was too costly. He couldn't let his guard down, especially now. He wasn't about to make the same mistake twice. He wouldn't risk anyone's life on his account.

Allowing the walls of restraint and protection to rise into place, Callen grabbed his gear and backed out unseen until all heads turned as he emerged from the front hall as he had done so many times before and headed toward Hetty's office.

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"Mr. Callen, good to see you." Hetty stated softly taking in the hard and guarded demeanor.

"Hetty, I take it the others are aware that I am back." He responded.

"They are, indeed. Would you care for a cup of tea?"

"No… thank you."

"mhm… Your biometrics have remained up to date so I simply need an address for your files."

"No, you don't. I will be where I need to be, when I need to be there." Callen replied.

"Emergencies?"

"I'm reachable."

"What about your emergencies, Mr. Callen?"

"Unnecessary."

"For the foreseeable future…the beach house, Hetty," Gibbs interjected as he watched Callen stiffen.

"Gibbs, what brings you here?" Callen asked.

"Came to make sure your butt showed up. Seriously, Callen? No word, you just disappear. I thought we had an understanding."

"It was one day… I needed time to think… I'm here. You can assure Leon I'm being a good little agent. I said I'd work here and I will. I keep my promises. It was good seeing you Gibbs. Tell Abby I said hi."

"You can call and tell her yourself. I'm still on vacation. Not going anywhere."

Callen looked at Gibbs accusingly, "No you're not… you're babysitting," he growled.

"Fine. I'm here to make sure this happens and no one screws it up. As of now, I am the new acting Assistant Director. I expect your ass back at the house tonight… and before you pretend, you're going to decline, don't! Don't make me come find you." Gibbs returned equally gruff.

For a brief moment in time Hetty came to the realization why they could never work long term on the same team and why they were as good of friends as they were.

"Fine. But you're doing the cooking." Callen smirked.

"Steak it is" Gibbs said returning the smirk, "Hetty… later Callen."

Callen turned briefly as Gibbs walked toward the main hall.

"He is a good friend." Hetty stated softly, not awaiting an answer, "Welcome back, Mr. Callen."

Tossing a glance her way with no true response, he aimed for the crowded bullpen.

"Callen!" Kensi called out as he headed to the coffee bar to grab a cup before setting his bag down at his desk.

Taking a quick sip, he turned to face the others. Sam had gone to speak with Hetty. For that he was grateful.

Where once Kensi would have greeted him with a hug, she now stood uncertain.

Deeks rose and walked around his own desk, offering his hand.

"Welcome back, Callen."

"Thanks, Deeks… Kensi."

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"He's back?" Sam asked.

"So, it seems," Hetty answered, leaning back into her chair, "And you, Mr. Hanna? Are you back as well?"

Sam glanced back to where the team stood welcoming their leader.

"Yeah, I'm back." Sam replied.

"Go easy on him, Sam. It's a tenuous truce at best."

"Understood."

"Welcome back," Hetty smiled.

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"Welcome back, Callen," Eric offered.

Callen gave him a small crooked grin, "Eric… Nell."

"So, the rumors are true?"

Callen smirked at the familiarity of it as he turned to face his old partner, "Decided to come back?" he responded question for question.

"My kids seemed to think I should… especially once they heard you were coming back." Sam answered, eyeing the man before him.

"As you have been told, I have decided to return to NCIS and in doing so, have been asked to return here to head up this team." Callen stated plainly, "Does anyone have a problem with this? If so, this is the time to speak up."

Callen looked at each person in turn before resting his sights on Sam.

"Hetty told me before you went lone wolf… again… that she asked you back. Have to say, I'm surprised. Question I have is… how long this time, G? How long until you decide to move on?"

Callen eyed his former partner thoughtfully, "Guess that depends on you, now doesn't it?"

Sam caught the meaning behind the words. He'd screwed up and Callen didn't trust him… didn't trust them. Nate said it would be a rough road back. Now, as he stood face to face… looking him in the eye, he wasn't sure it would be possible to scale the walls Callen had built around himself now in order to protect himself from being hurt again. They could only begin to hope he'd give them a chance.

"Then I guess we all have a lot of work ahead of us."

Callen's eyes narrowed as he considered his words, "I guess."

Looking at Eric his voice lowered as he stepped close, "Same rules apply as when we last spoke. Do we understand each other?"

Eric stared wide eyed with a small understanding nod.

"Good. I'm going to go work out for a bit. Let me know if something comes up." Callen clapped a hand against Eric's shoulder as he past.

Sam glanced over at Hetty who just stood at the top of her steps by her desk returning the concerned gaze.

"Well, this should be fun." Deeks shook his head.


	9. Chapter 9

**DISCLAIMER** **: Hello, no I don't own these fantabulous characters from NCIS LA, NCIS, and Leverage. Let's not dwell.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, once again, I find myself overwhelmed and blessed by the wonderful reviews and comments. Thank you so very much! I love these characters and the lives they have created here in my stories. HA. I love sharing those stories with you. I hope you enjoy this one... Once again, Deeks and Callen come to the front and center. I love these guys and their friendship. So different and yet so much alike. I can't wait to hear what you have to say... be kind... next chapter will help resolve some of this one... I may very well be putting that chapter up later, once I get back home.**

Over the course of the next few weeks it became very apparent that Callen had returned to be the team lead and nothing more, just as he had promised that first day. He showed up for debriefs and missions. He knew where the team was and what they were doing. But when the mission was finished, when the day was done, he disappeared.

On the weekends he completely checked out. Gibbs would pop in and out regularly, never knowing what he'd find when he'd arrive.

But Hetty knew him. She knew this Callen all too well. He was the 15-year-old boy she'd taken in. The boy who stood in the shadows watching and listening, learning how to adapt to his new surroundings… learning what it would take to blend in. What he would have to do to fly under the radar, protecting himself until it became apparent someone else needed protecting more. He was also the agent she sought out in an effort to save him from the solitary existence of a lone wolf, a gray man… his only purpose being that of an agent with no one to care what happened to him.

She'd lost contact once he'd gone off to college. Then while she was on a mission, she'd come back to find he joined the military, only to be pulled into the realm of the ABC agencies. A place, where in her point of view he was used and abused much the same as in the foster care system. At that point there was little to nothing she could do. She watched as he became one of the best undercover agents they'd ever seen, but also one of the most personally unpredictable and volatile. Soon he was being tossed around from one agency to another… partner's coming and going, until NCIS approved her request to start the Office of Special Projects.

She sighed sadly as she recalled the battle to find him and convince him to give them a chance. Now, after everything they'd gone through. All the progress made… she'd lost him again. Lost him to the enemies of the past. Now that he was back, barely… she was faced with the arduous task of reaching him and hoping she had enough time to repair the damage that had caused him to leave in the first place. So far, she'd seen little that made her hopeful.

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"Nothing much has changed since my last visit," Gibbs stated, leaning against the banister of the landing outside the OPS center, looking down on the now empty bullpen.

"No… he refuses to participate in anything other than work."

"Guess I shouldn't be surprised."

"He doesn't realize I know, but he has places throughout the mission where he can sit and watch… keep his fingers on the pulse of the team. At one time it was because he cared about them, thought of them as family, if only to himself. Now I have to wonder, does he watch because he cares or because he doesn't trust them." Hetty stated.

Gibbs looked over at the small woman next to him, normally bigger than life with her confidence and control. Now, however, she appeared unsure, tired, and worried, "Both… he cares about them or he'd never have come back… but he has good reason to question the trust… my guess is, it will come. Has he gone back to sleeping on that couch at night?" Gibbs grinned at the look on Hetty's face, "He used to steal naps on the couch in Lara Macy's office. It drove her nuts but she at least knew where he was. She eventually gave him a key to the office in case he needed a place to stay."

Hetty smiled, "ahhhh, a safe place to fall. Lara understood him well."

"Yeah, she did. Relax, Hetty. Give him time to settle in. It took a while the first time around. It's just gonna take a little longer this time."

She nodded her head in agreement, "I know what you say is the truth… I am just angry that it ever came to this in the first place," she paused before continuing in a lighter tone, "They just finished their latest case… they should be back soon. I would guess they will be going out for pizza and beer tonight", Hetty chuckled, "at least three of them will."

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"With me, Deeks!" Callen stated gruffly as he headed toward the locker room, leaving the others standing there unsure.

"Problems, Mr. Hanna?" Hetty called down from above as she and Gibbs made their way down the steps.

"Hey, Gibbs", Sam stated with a shrug and a sigh as he sat down at his desk, "Deeks…"

"Deeks lost his cool trying to protect me." Kensi stated, clearly concerned and upset.

"Rule 12… Never date a co-worker, let alone marry one." Gibbs grumbled as Hetty cocked her head to cast him a sideways glance.

Kensi, too, gave him an unappreciative look. "Hetty, you need to go after them. Callen is really angry."

"And that's different from any other time, how?" Sam chuckled, opening his computer. Despite everything, he knew his partner enough to know that he would be fair. He also knew Deeks well enough to know he could handle himself with Callen. Callen may take issue with them but nothing was more important to him than keeping his team safe.

"My dear, there's nothing I can say or do that will make a difference where Mr. Callen is concerned. To be fair, Miss Blye, it has been quite the battle to allow you two to stay together on the same team now that you are married. Mr. Callen would be well within his rights to move Mr. Deeks to another team if he deems it necessary," Hetty explained.

*********************************** LOCKER ROOM *************************************

"Callen, I know what you are going to say. I screwed up. You're right. I'm sorry and it won't happen again." Deeks offered.

Callen just studied the man in front of him for a moment before saying anything… causing Deeks to think he was seriously contemplating removing him from the team.

"You are a slow learner, Deeks. We talked about this several years ago… before… anyway, if you can't separate your personal life from work then you shouldn't be on the same team." Callen stated.

"I get it, Callen, but she's my WIFE! They had a GUN to her head. What did you expect me to do?" Deeks asked.

"I expected you to listen to directions and follow orders." Callen replied evenly.

"Are you KIDDING me? This is Kensi we're talking about. How can you be so cold and impersonal? They were going to kill her! What if that had been your wife? You were her mentor! She looks up to you! I get you have issues with us, but Callen…"

Callen's eyes grew dark, his face hardened. Deeks knew he had crossed a line in his effort to make Callen see his point of view. "I am the team lead. I don't have the luxury of emotions out there. My job is to lead this team out there to do a job and then bring you back in one piece but if I have to babysit you or Kensi or anyone else too emotionally invested then I can't do that. You need to make up your mind, either trust Kensi's training and my leadership or ask for a transfer to another team."

"So, you never get emotionally invested?" Deeks asked accusingly.

"Didn't say that. I would think our mission that put you in the hospital would have been proof enough of that. I don't put others in danger because of my personal feelings. Decide Marty… before I am forced to make that decision for you." Callen voiced sternly before softening, "I get it… you want her to be safe. You love her but she is a trained agent. In a lot of ways better trained for this than you. Don't undermine her out there by questioning her abilities. She will resent you for it eventually… if it doesn't get her killed first." He let it sink in for a moment before continuing, "trust her team." With that, Callen grabbed his duffel and headed for the door.

"Callen!" Deeks called out.

"Later, Deeks. Think about what I said. I want your decision Monday."

"And if I want to talk before," Deeks yelled out, hoping for a clue as to where he was disappearing to this weekend.

"Monday" was all he heard as the door shut, effectively ending their conversation.

As Callen entered the courtyard area of the mission, preparing to leave, he was stopped short by Kensi arguing the possibility of transferring Deeks. Before he could say a word, Hetty spoke up, "Mr. Callen, a word please?" Not waiting for an answer, she walked towards her office followed by Gibbs.

With a frustrated sigh Callen dropped his bags. Shooting a look at Sam and then Kensi he narrowed his eyes and spoke softly, "Your partner isn't the only one who needs to decide if they believe I am capable of leading this team. If not… then what am I doing here?" With that he turned and headed towards Hetty's desk.

"What is it, Hetty?"

"Sit… Tea? Chamomile mint, sweetened with a touch of lavender honey. Helps relax and rejuvenate. Mr. Gibbs, a cup of… sludge," she offered with a sniff and a pinched expression.

Callen didn't argue but sat and accepted the offered cup. "Back again, Gibbs? What is Leon so afraid of?"

"Same thing we're all concerned about." Gibbs replied.

Rolling his eyes, he turned back to Hetty, "So, what is it you want, Hetty?" he asked while sipping his tea, "My conversation with Deeks was justified so…"

"No, no, we're just touching base. Aside from this afternoon, obviously, how is it working out with the team? How are things working out between you and Sam?" Hetty asked.

"Are you asking if we've kissed and made up? If so, you are likely to be disappointed." Callen answered evenly.

"I see. Perhaps if you were to actually be here." Hetty stated.

Callen's eyes once again narrowed, "We've been down this road, it didn't end well. To be honest, I'm not too certain why I'm even here now. I get that the team was less than functional, but Sam is back and they appear to be getting along just fine. It is becoming painfully obvious that they still do not trust my leadership so perhaps you should be looking for a replacement."

"Mr. Callen, I'm confused. Did you or did you not agree to head up the team?"

"I did but I am confused as to why it was so important that I do. They were clear in their lack of faith in my leadership prior… as far as I can tell from today's escapades, that hasn't changed. So what game are we playing here, Hetty?" Callen challenged.

"Mistakes were made, Mr. Callen… on all sides." Hetty explained, sitting her cup down and catching the doubtful look in Gibbs eye.

"I beg to differ. I did my job" Callen retorted.

"You left, Mr. Callen. You left before we were given the whole story. Maybe, had you been up front with us, we could have avoided some of this." Hetty suggested calmly.

Callen put his cup on the desk as he slid to the edge of his seat. "I had a job to do… I will not apologize for doing it. I left because this team has no faith in me. Marty trusted me in the field and maybe you don't think he should have but it kept us both alive… he trusted me enough to know I wasn't purposely putting him in danger. He was willing to follow my lead once we discussed the reasons. You have been in this business far longer than I and you know full well that until a mission is finished there is information you simply can't divulge regardless of the implications. I wasn't the one who turned my back here, Hetty. What happened was on you and them. Had they cared enough to believe in me, there wouldn't have been an issue. The only thing I am guilty of is believing you when you encouraged me to trust them. You kept pushing your agenda to make sure I had a family. When will you learn, Hetty, I wasn't meant to live that life?"

Hetty leaned forward, hands folded on the desk in front of her, "Mr. Callen, we need to move forward. We have apologized. Everyone over there wants you here… to follow your lead, yes, but to make amends and regain your trust and your friendship. You have no idea just how truly sorry I am."

"For what, Hetty? What are you sorry for, exactly? For being a hypocrite when it comes to trust and loyalty? For turning your back on me? For the lies?" Callen demanded, once again feeling the old familiar sting of anger and resentment rising to the surface. They wanted him to forgive and forget and he wasn't sure when or if he would ever be able to do that.

"What lies? You made mention there were things I needed to answer to. What things?" Hetty asked curiously.

"Not now. I have too much to deal with now to deal with you too." Callen growled.

"So, am I to understand that you are unable to forgive this team and myself and give us an opportunity to correct the mistakes of the past? Or are you simply unwilling?" Hetty knew she was pushing. She also knew that it was a gamble.

Callen's blue eyes darkened as he glared across the desk at the woman he once would have died for in order to keep her safe. When he answered, his tone was cold and void of any emotion. Still, she knew him, she knew the chewing on the inside of his cheek was to help hide the emotions he felt showed weakness.

"What I am saying is, I don't have the time or energy to put into soothing hurt feelings and guilty consciences. I'm telling you to back the hell off and let me do my job. I'm telling you not to interfere. You want something that no amount of your pushing and manipulating is going to accomplish. If and WHEN I am ready to address this issue, you will know. Until then… if you find you don't have the patience to wait… then I guess you move forward without me."

"Callen, what's going on that we are obviously not aware of?" Gibbs asked evenly.

Leaning back in his chair, he sighed in frustration. He found himself actually debating sharing Joelle's message to get their take on it, but sense won out. He didn't know who he could trust and he wasn't ready to risk anyone's safety until he was sure.

"I have to go. Are we through here?" Callen demanded coldly.

"Where are you going?" Gibbs asked.

"Didn't know you were coming. Sorry, but I already made plans for the weekend." With that Callen got up to leave.

"Callen… Rule number 3", Gibbs called out to his retreating back, to which Callen replied by holding his private cellphone up for Gibbs to see. Only Gibbs, Ziva, Eric, and Sam's kids had the number."

"Well, that got you nowhere, Hetty. What were you thinking?"

Hetty huffed in return as she leaned back, "I was thinking it's time he stopped behaving like a petulant child."

"Really, Hetty?" Gibbs asked in a tone that had her thinking he was giving her a verbal "Gibbs slap". It was not a good feeling, all told. Just then his phone went off and Hetty saw him deflate.

"What is it, Leroy?" she asked quietly as he held up the message.

"Rule 42?" Hetty asked.

"Rule 42. Never accept an apology from someone who just sucker punched you." Gibbs translated.

"You and your damn rules. Agent Gibbs." Hetty groused. Gibbs was known for many things but two things he was famous for was his 'Gibbs slap' and 'Gibbs rules'… to which she knew Callen adhered to many if not most. She also knew that the rules numbered in the 40's were saved for only the most severe of situations. It became painfully clear that she gambled and lost on this hand.

"Dang it, Henrietta! You just couldn't leave well enough alone." Gibbs threw back as he stood to leave. "I will be back Monday and he had better damn well be here."


	10. Chapter 10

**DISCLAIMER** **: This wonderful group of characters are not mine… never have been, never will be… which saddens me…**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi there. I had planned to have this up sooner but I will be honest… I kept falling asleep. I just kept trying until here we are… Once I hit "post", I'm letting my head hit the pillow. I hope you enjoy!**

They watched as Callen stalked out followed shortly after by Gibbs.

"Wonder what that was about," Sam stated.

"Maybe she told him he couldn't transfer Marty." Kensi reasoned hopefully.

"Yeah, I kinda doubt that, Kensi", Sam chuckled as she sunk back into her seat.

It was then Deeks entered the bullpen. "So Deeks, how'd it go with Callen?

Sam asked with a grin.

Kensi jumped out of her seat, "Is he removing you from the team" she asked anxiously.

"What? No! I mean he brought the possibility up, but no. He just pointed out that I need to trust your training in the field and the team as a whole to keep you safe. He said I needed to trust him as team lead and your mentor and if I can't… I need to be asking for a transfer." He explained.

"So that's the decision Hetty mentioned?" Kensi asked, "Well, that's an easy decision. He's right, you need to trust me. You need to trust Sam… and Callen. Despite what either of you may think, Callen was a great mentor. I learned a lot from him. Between him and my dad… I know what I'm doing out there."

"She's right, man. Kensi can kick butt with the best of them. She's level headed when things get hot. She trusts us all to be there if things go wrong. You need to do that too. We've got her covered. Now, are we going for pizza or what?" Sam said as he grabbed his stuff up and headed for the door.

"Thanks Sam" Kensi called after him, "Give us a sec and we will be right out." She turned back to her husband who stood silently looking out across the courtyard.

"You okay, Marty?" she asked quietly.

"Uh, yeah… no, I'm fine. Kensi… Callen said something and well," he started as his eyes found and locked on hers.

"What. What did he say?" Kensi asked concerned.

"He said that you'd come to resent me one day for not trusting your training… for trying to keep you safe."

"oh", was all she said.

Deeks studied her, "Is he right?"

Kensi regarded him for a moment before responding, "I know you want to keep me safe and I love you for it… I do! But I trained hard for this job. Callen busted my butt in training to make sure I would be safe out there. He spent a lot of time teaching me everything I needed in order to do this job. He was hard on me, Marty, because he wanted to keep me safe even if he wasn't there… especially when he wasn't around. I love you for it, but you can't do it like this… like today. You need to trust me, as an agent. You need to trust our team and trust our training. It's not just you and me out there. There's Callen and Sam. We need to have each other's back. You can't do that if your head isn't in the game because you're worrying about me. Callen is right, if you can't do that then maybe we do need to be on different teams… because this is who I am Deeks. I am not giving it up." Kensi gave him a kiss, "I'll meet you at the car."

Deeks sat and thought over all that had happened to Kensi over the years. It amazed him how she kept going. Could he continue to go into the field and watch her be put in harm's way and stand by in hopes that Callen and Sam would keep her safe? Could he bear to let her into the field and NOT be there. He thought back to the mission that broke the team up. Callen risked his own safety in order to make sure Deeks lived. It didn't go according to plan, no… but Callen still made certain that help was there to make sure he went home to Kensi… He knew what his answer should be… still, it was going to be a very long weekend.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen was at his desk come Monday morning, working on reports as the others filed in. He hated reports as much now as he ever did but it was a distraction, at least, from the awkward silence that filled the space each morning.

Callen had spent the entire weekend in search of Joelle to no avail. Every lead was a dead end.

Sam watched him for a few minutes over the top of his own computer.

"So, did you have a good weekend, Callen?" Kensi asked in an effort to gauge his mood.

Barely pausing to answer, "Guess that would depend on your definition of good."

Kensi cast a glance across to Deeks and Sam, "Well, did you go anywhere, do anything?" she attempted again.

Once again, Callen didn't stop as he answered. "Low expectations but by those parameters… then yes, it was a good weekend."

Sam rolled his eyes as he leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms. "So, that's how we're doing this?"

"Doing what, precisely?" Callen asked finally looking up from his work.

"You storm out of here Friday, followed by an equally pissed off Gibbs and Hetty left looking like she'd been punched in the gut.

Callen leaned back and mimicked Sam's stance, "Oh, I've no doubt you want to know… however, you will just have to be disappointed since it was none of your business."

"None of our… just how do you come to that conclusion? We are a team… what affects you and Hetty affects us all." Sam growled.

Bypassing the subject at hand, Callen switched tactics, "Since you are so interested in team business. Let's chat. Deeks, I believe you were to have an answer for me today."

Kensi turned her attention toward her husband who returned her gaze as he cleared his throat.

"We can take this elsewhere if you prefer", Callen offered sincerely. He knew Deeks preferred not to deal with him alone. He never did and Callen never truly understood why. He still remembered how Deeks was the one who faced off with him when he had first found out about Joelle's connection with the CIA… To be fair, Deeks had earned his respect that night. He was not in a good way and well, he was sawing furniture into little pieces and burning it… while drinking. That could have gone very bad… Deeks never backed down. That wasn't the only time he dared to step up to him. It's one of the reason's he didn't try harder to replace him. He never knew quite what to expect from him but he always rose to the challenge. That was why he was certain this time would be no different.

Deeks turned to face Callen, his expression serious, "No, this is fine. We're a team and this involves all of us."

"Alright then… before we left here on Friday, I gave you an ultimatum… either stay and trust your partner's training and ability and believe your team has her back as well as your own OR you head on over to Hetty's desk and ask for a transfer… effective immediately. So, which is it?"

"You keep calling her my partner, but she's more than that, Callen. She is my WIFE."

Callen regarded him thoughtfully. He understood his struggle which made the decision going forward all the more necessary.

"Deeks, she may very well be your wife… but here? Out there in the field? She is an agent first. You have been here long enough, you should have learned that by now. There is a reason for the rule that does not permit agents in a relationship to work together. It's a good one in my opinion but since Hetty seems to pick and choose the rules she follows and because you seemed capable of keeping your personal lives separate, I didn't argue. However, it has become more and more of an issue until now, here we are…" Callen stopped a moment and looked to Kensi then back to locking eyes with Deeks, "Look Deeks, Kensi's father taught her well. She is one of the best sharp shooters out there. She is excellent with hand to hand combat. She is good at what she does or she would never have been on this team. You need to believe in her. When you go out into the field on a case you need… you HAVE to put all things personal aside… including the fact that she is your wife. From the moment you come through those doors and until you walk back out to go home, she is your partner."

Callen caught the look on Sam's face before he finished.

"And while Sam is itching to come to your defense as your friend… as an agent, he knows I'm right. Michelle would never have allowed Sam to do what you did. In fact, I dare say she would have knocked him on his butt for even trying. She was a great agent and plenty capable of handling things herself." Callen stopped a moment to collect his thoughts and push down the surge of emotion that seemed to surface any time his thoughts went to Michelle. She had been an excellent agent and could protect herself… until she couldn't… he'd let her down, let Sam down and that would be something that haunted him the rest of his life… but not in the field… he would never allow himself to be found distracted in the field and cause anyone else to be harmed on his watch, "So Deek's which will it be? Stay or go?" Callen sat back and waited.

"Not everyone has your flair for shutting things out and ignoring their feelings." Sam quipped.

Callen smirked but grew serious. It was important that Deeks understood… if he wanted to go home with his wife each evening, he needed to separate the personal from the professional, "Perhaps, but I would be dead a dozen times over if I didn't."

Deeks kept his gaze on Callen, "You gave me a similar ultimatum once before… all in or get out. I didn't quit then and I'm not quitting now. You're right… and while I can't just forget she is my wife when we're out there… I believe in this team and there is no one I trust more to have her back. I'm staying, Callen." Deeks stare bore into Callen in an effort to prove his resolve.

The space fell quiet and after a tense few moments the corner of Callen's mouth twitched into a half smirk as he gave a short nod of approval, "Last warning, Deeks."

"I know… we're good" Deeks confirmed.

Callen turned to look at Kensi, "We good here?" he asked.

Kensi smiled. Callen had given her a warning too. She knew he was right. She should never have gone above his head to, of all people, Hetty… Now here he sat telling them all that Kensi was one of the best sharp shooters among other compliments. Compliments that Callen rarely offered. "Yeah, we're good."

Again, Callen nodded before turning back to his computer.

To be honest, he was glad to be done with the whole conversation. Deeks was a good man and he and Kensi made a good team both in and out of the field. They were good for one another… an almost perfect balance. He was just glad Deeks stood firm. She would have hated him for it if things had gone any other way and he may have lost her too. Callen had missed Kensi. Her smile lit up her whole face. He appreciated the fact that she could take down a bad guy and look so good doing it. She didn't need to primp to look beautiful. Callen also admired her for all she had overcome to become the woman she was today. Another time, another place he would have given Deeks a run for his money but truthfully, Kensi was better off with Deeks than she ever would have been with him. Then there was Anna. She was a lot like Kensi… maybe too much… they could never survive working on the same team for long. That was more than obvious when Kensi had been recovering from being in the coma. For the same reason… she was better off with someone else… anyone other than him. Ziva was the closest he came to someone he would feel even remotely comfortable attempting a relationship with. Even that was doomed to fail once she realized she loved Tony more. Like Deeks and Kensi… Tony and Ziva were a good balance. They worked. Truth was, Callen and Ziva were just too much alike to have lasted.

He let out a sigh and ran a hand over his face as he leaned back. His life wasn't where he had hoped it to be and it frustrated him. He knew he would always have enemies but he had hoped once they had taken down the last of the Comescus he would finally be able to live his life.

Sometimes he downright hated Hetty for allowing him to believe it could be any other way but what it was. He would never admit it to another soul but he longed for what Kensi and Deeks had together… for what Sam and Michelle had once shared.

"G… G!" Sam called out.

Pulling himself from his darkening thoughts, Callen looked over at his partner.

"Everything okay?" Sam asked, concern in his voice. He had watched as Callen's mood darkened the more lost in his thoughts he became.

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?" he responded, shutting down his computer and closing it. "I'm going to go work out… let me know if we get a case."

"Hey, want some company? We could spar… or make it team training", Sam offered.

Callen stopped as he passed the desks and turned toward Sam, his eyes stormy… jaw set, "Not today, Sam. Besides, you, me and sparring probably isn't a good idea…" With that, he continued on to the gym where he spent the next hour taking his frustrations out on the punching bag and the wing chun dummy. Being back at OSP was messing with his head. It would be too easy to slip into the false notion that things could be what they once were… or rather what he'd thought things once were. The more he thought about it, the harder the punches and the faster the moves. Finally, he slowed to a halt.

"Feeling better?" Hetty asked.

"About what?" Callen mumbled wiping the sweat from his face.

"Whatever was driving you to pummel that poor defense dummy."

"Then no… but then no amount of hitting it would. It is what it is, Hetty." He remarked coldly.

"Ahh, well, if you need to talk…" she began.

"I don't." Callen answered then left Hetty alone as he headed for the showers.

Hetty re-entered the courtyard heading toward her office when the door alarm rang announcing an unsanctioned visitor. Eric and Nell appeared at the balcony, "Some people here… to see Callen… Do I let them in?"

"Did they give you a name?" Hetty asked.

"No, I asked… said it was none of my business." Eric complained.

"There's three of them… two men and one woman", Nell stated.

"Callen didn't give you a heads up?" Gibbs asked.

"Nope, none. What should we do?"

"Let them in." Hetty replied.

"Sam, Deeks, escort duty" Gibbs ordered. He didn't like it. Callen had been acting off more so than normal as of late and now this. Another enemy? Not something any of them needed.

Eric disappeared momentarily to unlock the door. Within moments, they were coming down the hall as Eric and Nell joined them in the bullpen.

"Nice building", the one man stated, appreciating the architecture of the old Spanish style mission.

"Thank you… Mr.?" Hetty inquired.

"Yeah, unwilling to divulge personal information. I'm here to see G. Callen", was all he offered with a sharp look toward his companions as a warning to stay quiet.

"Unless you can give us a little more information, we cannot in all good conscience allow you to stay." Hetty replied.

"Look, I don't know you, lady, but what I have to say is no one's business but Callen's. So, I guess we're at a stalemate", he said as Sam stood in front of him next to Hetty while Deeks and Kensi flanked their sides.


	11. Chapter 11

**DISCLAIMER** **: You know the drill… they ain't mine… not one single character from NCIS LA, NCIS, or Leverage. I am not happy about it, but it is what it is… I guess we have to live with it.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: OOOOOOOOHHHHHHH BOY! Now we are getting into it! I love these characters! Nope, Callen isn't going to make it easy on them. I'm not sure if it's because he wants to get back at them so much or if it's because he doesn't quite know how to "come home"… the journey has only just begun… I reckon we will just have to wait and see… ENJOY! Please, please, please, leave a review when you are done… I relish the moments when I get the word that I have a review waiting for me. The excitement, the trepidation… oh my!**

Gibbs noticed the man begin to bristle… an uncanny resemblance to Callen's behavior, "Hetty, Sam, stand down." He ordered.

Sam shot Gibbs a look but with one nod, Sam motioned for the others to step back.

"Relax Spencer", Callen ordered as he entered the room freshly showered and dressed for the day.

"Callen!" the young woman squealed excitedly with an exuberance that took them all by surprise.

"Parker" he returned with a smirk as he accepted her hug with a brief reminder of where she was and to keep her sticky fingers to herself.

She flashed him a big innocent smile that made him chuckle.

Turning his attention to the other two, "Hardison" he then accepted the extended hand of his friend Eliot Spencer. "How are you doing, Spencer" he asked, paying no mind to the questioning looks.

Pulling Callen into a brotherly hug, "Staying busy", he lowered his voice for the second part, "We need to talk…Now."

"Mr. Callen? Hetty asked.

He turned to face Hetty, he owed her some form of explanation. Strangers weren't permitted to know, let alone enter the 'Office of Special Projects'.

"Hetty Lange… Eliot Spencer. We have known each other for a long time. These are his associates. Now if you'll excuse us?" Callen explained.

"Mr. Callen, I'm happy to meet your friends but you know the rules."

"Hetty, you should know by now, they wouldn't be here if I didn't vet them first."

Callen turned toward Eric, "If a case comes up, call me. I will be back shortly."

"Sure, Callen."

Hardison's eyes widened. As they walked away, he spoke in awe, "That… that was him. He was the one?"

Callen had to chuckle at the way Hardison was awestruck over Beale. Eric would have loved to know there was someone who was so impressed by him. It saddened him that he couldn't introduce them… at least not yet. If they figured out who they were, Hetty would be all over it.

"So, Eliot… Hardison and Parker?" Callen asked in a questioning tone.

"What, once he knew I was coming, there was no stopping him and where he goes, Parker goes."

"Well, once Hetty finds out… and she will… no doubt, she has Eric and Nell all over it as we speak."

"That's the least of our problems, buddy." Eliot stated gruffly.

"What? Why? Did Hardison find something?" Callen asked, the previous conversation now forgotten.

"You could say that."

"So?" Callen pushed.

"Hardison!" Eliot called out to his friend.

"Yeah? Oh, right… Well, I did a check into Blackguard like you asked. Not at all easy, by the way. They are aptly named. However, I did a little back door shuffle and was able to get a look at the predecessor to the Blackguard of today. You guys do some serious business, by the way. Anyway, there was some sketchy stuff going on back in the day. Now, I was only able to get a mere glimpse before I was locked out and their security system reset itself. However, I stumbled across a file called, 'The Lost Children'. It was a list of children's names."

"For what purpose?" Callen asked, not liking where this was going.

"That's the thing… I don't know… yet. But just before I was kicked out, I caught two names." Hardison swallowed.

"What two names?", Callen asked lowly.

"G Callen and Eliot Spencer." Hardison stated quietly.

Callen didn't say anything at first. He looked up at Eliot who waited expectantly, "Well, it makes sense they'd have our names. We worked for them before." Callen reasoned.

Hardison shook his head, "No, this list was different. It was from the 70's and 80's"

Callen and Eliot shared a look, "Keep looking…there has to be more." Callen stated.

"I've been trying but I haven't been able to secure an in… their security keeps rewriting itself after knocking me out…" Hardison explained.

"That's not the only problem", Eliot added.

"What are you talking about?"

"Callen, we've gained a tail ever since we started delving into this. I told you they wouldn't be happy."

"So, you drew them here!" Callen asked, alarmed.

"Wha… NO!" Eliot growled, "Give me SOME credit here. They're out there… looking."

"Didn't you use a secured server?"

"Of course. I encrypted everything but I've seen this security protocol before." Hardison explained, "Steranko Security Systems."

"Steranko is the most advanced security system around," Hardison shuddered at the memory of their experience with the system. "Parker was nearly killed by it. It was only the combined efforts of our team that prevented it."

"That's why we came in person. Hardison is going to need help. Plus, I couldn't leave them alone and vulnerable. They aren't trained for our lifestyle, Callen." Eliot explained.

"Okay, what about Sophie and Nate? Where are they?" he asked.

"Away…"

Callen didn't push. Eliot knew his people, "Okay then. Well, I have to go back or they will be all over me about this." Callen stated. "I will no doubt have some fires to put out as is. Look there are a few places in the mission that aren't used. I go there to clear my head sometimes. I'm sure Hetty knows about them but we may get lucky. Hardison, stay off the computer. Eric and Nell will find you as soon as you do, got it?"

Callen showed them where to wait in the shadows of the old building before retreating to come back in the main entrance to avoid further questions.

The bullpen sat empty, as did Hetty's desk. Callen called up to Ops in search of the team.

"They went to lunch and Hetty had a meeting", Eric explained.

"and Gibbs?"

"Director Vance called him back. He said to tell you he'd be back this weekend."

"Thanks, Eric."

Callen hung up the phone and looked around him. He tried to imagine a time when they were all on the same page. When the air wasn't filled with tension and anger… when he wanted to be there. Now though, he just felt exhausted. He walked over and sat down on 'his' couch, laying his gun next to him and running his hands over his face before resting his head back with a sigh.

Eliot watched his friend from above. It was more than clear that things hadn't improved in the least. What was coming down the pike would either make or break the fragile truce they had created.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen had fallen into a less than restful sleep when the team returned from their lunch. Kensi and Deeks were once again arguing.

"Do you two ever NOT argue?" Sam chuckled as he tossed his keys onto his desk unaware, they weren't alone.

"Whoa there, Callen!" Deeks called out with his hands up in front of him as both Sam and Kensi looked up.

"G, put the gun down." Sam growled.

Callen holstered his gun as the adrenalin of a moment before began to drain away, "Sorry."

"Everything okay?" Kensi asked.

"I'm fine… you just caught me off guard."

"You… off guard. Seriously G? Where's your friends?" Sam asked.

"Why?" Callen answered question for question, folding his arms across his chest.

"Where do you know them from?" Deeks tried this time.

"None of your business," Callen replied evenly.

"That Parker? She really seemed excited to see you." Kensi stated with a smile.

"She's funny like that."

"Well the one guy, what was his name… Spencer? That guy was intense." Deeks added nonchalantly as he settled into his desk.

"He's not big on people nosing into his business. We're a lot alike in that regard" Callen warned.

"G, Come on. What's going on? Who are these people and why did they just show up here?"

Callen looked to Sam, "I'm going to say this one time… if and when it ever becomes your business, I will let you know.


	12. Chapter 12

**DISCLAIMER** **: No... No... and finally, No... I do not own these wonderful characters...**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi there, not much to share today but this wee little chapter. It truly isn't very long, sorry. I hope you enjoy it anyway. As always, I am asking for you to please leave a review when you finish reading. Thank you in advance.**

Sam watched as Callen headed off toward the armory.

"Let him go, Sam" Hetty ordered.

"Something is going on with him, Hetty!"

"Agreed, Mr. Hanna. However, until he is prepared to trust us with that information, we must respect his desire for privacy." Hetty replied.

"You're joking, right?" Sam asked incredulously.

"Quite the contrary, I assure you," she replied as she turned to walk back to her desk, "Stand down, Mr. Hanna."

Sam blew out a frustrated sigh as he dropped down into his chair stewing over his partner's continued evasiveness.

Eliot knew the potential was there. These people obviously cared. They simply didn't understand him, which was a hard thing for anyone to do… not having lived a life like they had. Add to that Callen's childhood and it was no wonder they clashed.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Over the course of the next week, Deeks held true to his word regarding Kensi and the case load had been uneventful. However, Callen was becoming more agitated by the day. His search into Joelle's message and her whereabouts proved fruitless. He dissected the message word by word, phrase by phrase… 'What was she getting at? Why didn't she just come out and say it? Enough with the secrets.' He thought to himself on more than one occasion. He was sick and tired of everyone knowing more about his life than he did.

The team could feel his anger and frustration rising and felt helpless to do anything for him. He remained distant unless it involved a case, only then was he focused and approachable.

Eliot, Hardison, and Parker kept to the beach house while he was at work. Late in the evening they would go to the mission and while Hardison worked on looking for more information, Parker would watch Eliot and Callen work out and spar.

By the end of the week it became clear that Hardison needed help. Callen struggled with the decision but ultimately, he knew they needed Eric.

"So, Callen, how are we going to work this? Your partner, Sam is it? He's not going to be happy if he finds out you're pulling Eric into this. It's not going to get easier as time goes on, maybe you should tell your team? Eliot suggested.

"Have you told Nate and Sofie?" Callen asked.

"No, Nate would not be happy and Sofie would do nothing but worry." Eliot replied, realizing he was answering his own question, "yeah, okay."

Callen chuckled, "until I figure out what's going on… I really don't need or want their input."

"Yeah, well what about this Gibbs? You said he was due back this weekend?"

"Not yet. We'll make excuses in the evening. If we're lucky he won't question it." Callen stated.

"Okay, can we trust this Eric to keep his mouth shut?" Eliot questioned.

"In the past, I'd say no but he seems to be doing better."

"You mean he's scared of you?" Eliot laughed.

Callen shrugged, "Yeah, probably. Whatever it takes."

"When are you planning to ask?"

"Today, case load is pretty much finished for the week. Should be able to find a moment to ask." Callen answered, "Stay put. Any problems, call my burner."

"We're fine." Eliot responded.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen waited till lunch before searching out Eric. Deeks, Kensi, and Nell went out on the lunch run while Sam went to work out on the punching bag. No doubt, the victim of today's beating would be none other than himself. He suppressed a shudder as he recalled the many times he had been forced to be on the receiving end of multiple 'pulled' punches by Sam Hanna for the sake of a case. He had to chuckle as he remembered Michelle's reaction when she'd found out his broken ribs were the product of just such an instance. He had almost felt sorry for his partner… almost.

"Hey, Callen" Eric greeted as Callen entered the Ops center.

"Eric" Callen returned as he went to the control panel and effectively shut the room down to prying ears and eyes.

"Okay… so what's up?" Eric asked nervously.

"Need your help, Eric. However, it would be a side mission… off the books. Just you and only you. Which means no talking to Hetty or Nell or the team. If you are uncomfortable with that. You need to say so now. I will not hold it against you. However, if you choose to agree and you break my trust…" Callen's voice deepened and his visage darkened.

"Got it," Eric swallowed dramatically.

"Let me know by the end of the day." Callen added before restoring access to the room and exiting.

Eric couldn't decide whether to be honored or scared. Callen's outside missions were rarely without danger and always intense and exciting. He found himself being drawn to the possibilities. Callen seldom asked his involvement in favor of Nell. He understood why. Hetty was a scary individual when she wanted to be and he knew he wasn't the best at hiding things… she was able to scare him into telling her anything she wanted to know which is why he made the Ops center HIS domain. In there, he was comfortable and ahead of the game. Things had changed, however, since Callen's return. Dynamics were different and Eric had changed… Nell was to thank for that.

As the day came to a close and everyone was preparing to head out, Callen looked directly at Eric, his brow raised in question as the two tech wizards entered the space. Eric simply nodded as Callen grabbed his bag and went to leave.

"Callen!" Kensi called after him.

"I told you already, I have plans" he called out, never slowing or looking back.

============================== END OF THE WEEK DRINKS ==============================

"I talked to Callen earlier today about coming but he wasn't having it." Kensi offered as she joined the others at the table."

"I thought he was tense when he first came back… but he's like a ticking time bomb these days", Deeks added.

"Eric, Nell… do either of you have a clue what he's been up to?" Sam asked.

"Nope, nothing. Why would we? It's not like he confides in us." Eric replied in a rush that had them all looking at him curiously, especially Nell, "What?" he asked nervously.

"Nell, any idea if Hetty knows something more than what she's let on?" Sam persisted.

"No." Nell replied still casting curious glances Eric's direction.

'Well, I'm telling you, something doesn't feel right and I can't decide whether I should be angry with him or worried about him." Sam told the group.

"Neither is productive" Kensi interjected, "but if you have to choose one, choose one of concern. Haven't we tried the angry route long enough?"


	13. Chapter 13

**DISCLAIMER** **: I do not own any character from the following shows: NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. However, any other characters who happen to pop up and the story itself is alllllllllllllllll mine.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Welp, here ya go. Not a whole lot going on here but it's a part of the journey. I'm debating whether to continue posting over the next several days or not… due to the holidays…. Thoughts?**

 **Enjoy!**

Later that evening Eric met Callen, Eliot, Hardison and Parker back at his apartment.

"Any chance of Nell showing up here?" Callen asked as Eric stepped back to let them in.

"No, she has plans and before you ask, yes, I ran a check and there are no bugs or tracers in the house or the computers. We're good." Eric answered as he glanced at the newcomers.

Callen caught the look then cleared his throat, "Sorry… Eric this is Eliot Spencer, Alec Hardison and Parker… and this…" Callen looked straight at Hardison, "This is Eric Beale, tech wizard extraordinaire… breaker of the internet."

Eric glanced at Callen with a strange look but Callen would swear he could see him puff up. "Hardison is a fan of your work." Callen chuckled. He was pretty sure Eric's interests lie more with Parker.

Sobering, Callen continued, "Eric. Do you remember the message you sent me a few weeks ago?"

"From a dead woman? Kinda hard to forget." Eric deadpanned.

"Yeah, okay. I have been trying to make sense of the thing ever since. I asked Hardison to look into a few things and…"

"Wait. You asked someone else to do it? Someone who's not me?" Eric asked, interrupting Callen. Obviously hurt by the news.

Eliot suppressed a grin at the interaction. Callen seemed genuinely surprised by the reaction.

"I'm sorry?" Callen responded uncertainly, "I wasn't sure it was the best idea at the time to involve you."

"Oh, but now it is? Why? Because you're stuck?" Eric asked indignantly.

Callen was taken back by the outburst. Once again, he was reminded at just how much had changed since he'd left. The Eric from four years ago would never get this worked up and abrasive.

"Eric, if this is going to be a problem…"

Again, Eric interrupted… "No, I didn't say that. I just can't believe you didn't come to me first, that's all. No offense to you… Hardison… right? I'm sure you are a great hacker…"

"Point made… now can we get back to the matter at hand?" Callen asked, thoroughly frustrated.

"okay."

"I asked Hardison to look into Blackguard. He found something but the security system kept knocking him out. I will let him explain. Point is, Beale, we need you to help him get past their walls. I knew if anyone could do it, it would be you."

Eric looked at the man in front of him. Callen didn't often boast someone's abilities. He didn't go lightly if someone screwed up but he was never overtly mean either. Still, when he did compliment them, it meant something. "Callen, this is the CIA we're talking about here."

"You saying I'm wrong? You can't do this?" Callen suggested before breaking into a trademark smirk at the look Eric gave him.

"That's not what I'm saying. I was merely point out the obvious fact that it's the CIA. You aren't SUPPOSED to be able to hack into their computers. It's going to take time."

"How much time?" Eliot asked.

Eric shrugged, "Don't know. I won't know until I start looking. You can't rush art."

"Right, well, we'll let you two get to it. In the meantime, Eliot and I will beef up your security."

"My what? Why?" Eric asked.

"As you said, this is the CIA and they won't take kindly to your rummaging through their files."

"If they figure out it's me, then I'm not doing my job." Eric stated flatly, not bothering to look up at them.

Eliot looked at Callen with a grin that Callen returned, "Be that as it may… I will feel better knowing you're covered. You have my burner number if you need me." Callen returned.

Eliot chuckled inwardly at the conversation. Callen cared for the kid and was more than impressed by his ability and it was equally obvious how much the kid looked up to him. It amazed him how his friend didn't see it but then Callen had made an art form out of convincing himself he didn't deserve the attention.

The two men worked out the logistics for Eric's security system and had it up and running by the time they decided to call it a night.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen was sleeping less than what would have been considered normal even for him as he searched for leads on Joelle and leaving earlier and earlier in order to lose the tail he had gained.

"Where is it you are going every night," Gibbs asked after Callen had blown him off again.

"Out…" Callen stated filling his cup with the fresh coffee Gibbs had made.

"What is it you and these friends of yours are into?" Gibbs asked again.

"They had time off and decided to come for a visit. Nothing more, nothing less" Callen answered.

"For nearly a month? I highly doubt it. You don't have the kind of friends you just hang out with. So, I'll ask you again, what the hell are you up to, Callen?" Gibbs asked evenly.

Callen looked over towards his friend. They'd known each other for a long time. They'd worked well together on many cases, some more noteworthy than others but from it they'd forged a solid friendship that Callen valued greatly. Gibbs was always straight forward and honest with him… a rarity as it turned out. Still, Gibbs had come and gone more in the last few months than he had in all the years he'd known him. 'Why?' he kept asking himself. 'Why was his being here on this team so important to him and Leon. Why was Leon so concerned with his possibly leaving and going back to Blackguard… not that it was a threat at this point. Not now that it was apparent they, too, were somehow messing in his affairs.' Gibbs had spent way too much time with Hetty for his comfort. He just couldn't decide if he could trust him to keep his confidence at this point.

"Why are you here, Gibbs? You and I both know this Assistant Director job is bogus." Callen challenged.

Gibbs could see the distrust in his friend's eyes. He'd warned Leon but Leon had wanted Callen settled back in NCIS, the only agency that had been successful in handling the volatile agent. He knew it would take correcting the mess in LA to make it work. Gibbs job was to make sure Hetty didn't mess with his shaky reconnect within the group.

"Leon simply wants to make sure nothing gets screwed up this time." Gibbs shrugged.

Callen watched him carefully, looking for any 'tells' that would show he was lying but he saw none. "Gibbs, if they are honest about their intentions then there is nothing to worry about. There's nothing Leon can do that will change who they are and what they really want."

"And, what do you want?" Gibbs asked every bit as observant.

Callen looked down into his now empty cup.

"If you're looking for an answer in that cup, you should have chosen some of that fancy tea Hetty has around here." Gibbs smirked.

"Funny… I don't know what I want," Callen answered quietly.

"You sure about that?" Gibbs returned doubtfully.

"What I want or need is seldom what I get, so why bother. I just wait for what gets handed me" Callen shrugged as he put his cup in the sink and headed for the bullpen.

Gibbs just shook his head as he, too, placed his cup in the sink. He wanted to give his head a swat for his stubbornness but even Gibbs knew better than to risk an involuntary backlash as a result, plus he honestly couldn't argue… Callen wasn't lying, life had never been fair and it always left him scrambling. It amazed him that he could be such an excellent agent and leader yet appear so lost and uncertain with the rest of his life. He was equally amazed at the number of parental figures he had had trying to save, to guide, to offer him a safe place to fall. There had been Granger, strangely enough. There had always been Hetty, Arkady, Leon, Sam and himself included. Yet the man fought them all in the name of self-defense. In all truthfulness, Callen was a broken man and yet that was the very thing that made him the excellent agent he was.


	14. Chapter 14

**DISCLAIMER** **: I do not own any of the characters of NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. However, all other characters and the story itself is all mine.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, if you are wanting to read then I will try and continue to post. It's about to get fun! Enjoy!**

Gibbs watched as the rest of the team slowly began filtering into the bullpen. Callen did the obligatory good morning before immersing himself in work, effectively blocking out any other interaction. Yet, from time to time he would see Callen cast a fleeting glance at the other three members of the team… Gibbs shook his head in frustration over his friend's insistence at being alone.

"G… G… seriously man?" Sam scowled as he attempted to get his partner's attention.

Callen was preparing to respond when Gibbs came in, "If anyone has any plans this weekend… cancel them."

All eyes shot up questioningly, "Why? What's going on? You have a case you need our help on?" Kensi asked.

Callen let out a chuckle, "Case… there's only one case…" he mumbled as he rested back in his chair.

"Nope, Cookout on the beach. Friday." Gibbs stated looking Callen in the eye. "Callen's temporary home. Mandatory attendance."

"Now, wait just a…" Callen started to protest when it became Gibbs turn to chuckle, "Mandatory attendance, Agent Callen. Team building exercise. See to it that Beale and Jones get there." Gibbs looked at the stricken look on Callen's face and stepped the challenge up another notch, "Pack your bags for the weekend."

"Really? Weekend on the beach? Surfing allowed?" Deeks asked.

"7 p.m. until I say you can leave." Gibbs stated as he headed toward Hetty's desk.

Callen tossed his pen onto his desk with a frustrated grunt.

"Yes!" Deeks yelled as he jumped up, "Surfing good out there?" he asked Callen.

"I guess." He replied rolling his eyes.

"Yes! I'm gonna go tell the wonder twins… come with me, my dear?" Deeks asked, offering his hand toward Kensi who accepted after casting a glance between Sam and their stewing lead agent.

Once alone, Sam cleared his throat, "So, a cookout." He said, not attempting to hide the smile pulling at his lips. Callen shifted his gaze and said nothing but allowed the return of a genuine smirk. That was good enough for Sam. He'd take the familiar response as a win.

Callen leaned forward placing his head in his hands as they rested on his desk before turning his chair to better see Hetty's office. 'What were they up to now?' was the question running through his thoughts, "Eliot's gonna love this," he mumbled shaking his head.

"What was that, Callen?" Kensi asked as she returned to her desk.

"Nothing." Callen sighed as he pulled himself up from his chair and headed for the armory. Sam could be heard chuckling as he left.

That evening, Gibbs took the liberty of informing their guests of the weekend's events. Callen caught the look that passed between Hardison and Parker. They were obviously on board.

Callen just shook his head. It was going to get interesting.

Eliot surprised Callen by preparing the food for the event. He seemed slightly less bothered by the prospect than Callen. For Eliot, it offered him a chance to further evaluate the people who made up the core of Callen's world. He liked Gibbs and could see the genuine concern he had for Callen… he could also see Callen's trust beginning to waiver for the man, the more he found him interacting with this Hetty Lange. He also noticed his friend relaxing more and more into his role of team lead but the walls remained as far as the reconciliation went in regards to their friendships. As long as this latest cloud hung over him, that was unlikely to change. His concern was for what these people's expectations were regarding G Callen.

Callen wasn't happy about the weekend for more than one reason. Besides the fact that it blew any chance of Hardison and Eric working on this mission, he didn't trust the reason for Gibbs having this so-called team building weekend. Pushing him to reconnect was only making him warier of their intention and less willing to play along. He had had enough of people messing in his life. This latest hiccup in his world was not something he wanted to involve any more people in than necessary. These things were almost always dangerous to the people he cared about and never easy to figure out and deal with. In the end, he was always alienated from the very people he tried so hard to protect and left alone once again. He was tired of being alone all the time. Truth was, it hadn't been entirely miserable being back. He liked the familiarity. He also liked not having to wake up each morning with the knot in his stomach over who he had to find and extract information from and who was going to lose their life at his hands. His one desire was that these people never find out any more than they already did about what his job entailed over the past four years. He debated finding a way to wangle a few extra hours Saturday morning where Eric could work on the case… until he remembered how excited Deeks got at the prospect of surfing and he knew Eric would be equally so. Gibbs's team building weekend won out. Now he just had to find a way to survive having these people nosing into his space and business.

He found every reason in the book to drag his feet going home Friday evening. When he finally did pull up to the cottage, he noticed the presence of a strange car in the mix.

"Now what?" Callen muttered.

His answer came in the form of a vibrant brunette attacking him with a bear hug upon entering the side door.

"G Callen!" Abby yelled as she crashed into him.

"Hey there, Abby Sciuto." G greeted as he returned the hug.

"And I thought Parker was excitable." Eliot grumbled.

"Watch it, Sparky!" Parker replied as she brushed past him giving no attention to the low growl that rumbled in response to the nickname the blonde had given him years earlier.

"Come on, Callen." Abby grabbed him by the hand and all but dragged him through the house to the deck beyond.

"Gibbs! He's back!" Abby called. Callen stopped short at who else was awaiting him.

"Ziva." Callen stated.

"Hello, Callen."

"What are you doing here?" Callen asked with a questioning glance to Gibbs who just shrugged with a smirk.

"'Bout time you got here, we're starving" came yet another familiar voice.

Callen straightened and sucked in a breath before letting it back out slowly, "Tony".

"Hey Callen. Nice digs. Hard to believe this is your place." Tony quipped before letting out a painful grunt then added, as he rubbed the back of his head and neck, "Sorry boss. Lovely place you have here."

"It is, but it's not mine…" Callen left it at that.

"Gibbs said you were having a weekend beach party so we decided to surprise you, Leon thought it was a great idea." Abby offered.

"I just bet he did." Callen responded, "I take it you have met Eliot, Hardison, and Parker already?"

"We have" Abby replied with a big smile,

"You have such an eclectic group of friends." Ziva stated.

Callen smiled as he replied, "Yes, well, last I checked you were part of that group," to which Ziva merely returned the smile.

Eliot stepped up next to Callen, "She is everything you said… but seriously? This is the guy she chose over you?" he mumbled.

"Shut it, Spencer." Callen hissed.

"Just asked a question, brother" Eliot chuckled.

"She's better off" Callen grumbled as he went to grab a beer in an attempt to forget those special days with Ziva… before Tony. Eliot just stayed put, shaking his head.


	15. Chapter 15

**DISCLAIMER** **: Same as always, no, I don't own any of the characters from NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. I do claim ownership of any other characters popping up, as well as, the story line itself! Mine, mine, mine.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, this should come as a great surprise… I'm early! Figured I best get this posted now or it may not… there are presents to wrap, meals to prepare, candy to make, eventually cocoa to prepare and lights to be seen before settling down to a lovely little movie with the family… which is missing one member this year (daughter just HAD to get married and move away this spring…. But she will be home tomorrow morning!) YAY! I pray you all have a wonderful and very Merry Christmas… or Happy Holiday… Whatever you celebrate, may it be blessed. If you don't celebrate this time of year… may your day be blessed regardless. (Did I cover everything? I want no one to be hurt or missed… I'm overthinking this, aren't I. I am… I do that, you know… sorry… You probably don't care about that… just want to read the story and here I am just rambling on and on and on … (cheeky)**

The next morning came way too soon for Callen's liking. He'd not slept for more than a couple hours. He had walked the beach a good portion of it… constantly on alert.

Eliot had joined him near day break…

"Couldn't sleep?" Callen had asked as he walked up to meet him.

"You know how it goes. I've got a bad feeling about this Blackguard business."

"Yeah, I know. This thing Gibbs has cooked up is a mistake on so many levels." Callen stated absently.

Eliot chuckled softly, "You sure that's not just you afraid of having some fun for a change? When's the last time you just relaxed?"

"This isn't the time for that" Callen replied, throwing a rock out into the early morning surf, "Spencer, we have enough attention on us. This isn't helping anything."

"Yeah… Nate and Sofie are due back soon."

"You need to go back?" Callen asked.

"No. Told them we're helping out here for a bit," Eliot replied simply.

"Really… and Nate's okay with that?" Callen grinned.

"You kidding?" Eliot smirked, "Nah, they're more than happy to continue their honeymoon."

"Ah, good for them." Callen offered sincerely, "They're good people and Nate deserves some happiness."

"That's the truth. Think you'll ever try your hand at that kind of happiness?" Eliot asked with equaled sincerity.

"What? The white picket fence with two kids and a minivan? No. That's not in the cards for people like me." Callen couldn't keep a touch of the bitterness he felt from seeping through, "and you?" he glanced briefly at his friend.

Eliot sighed before answering, "Nah, I'm in the same boat as you. Too much blood on my hands and way too many enemies to ever hope for a happily ever after."

Callen only nodded but said no more. The sun would rise soon and shortly after, the team would be getting up and heading down to the beach for some surfing and who knew what else. But if he would hope for any further sleep it would need to be now. Besides it was way too early in the day to deal with the excitable likes of Marty Deeks and Eric Beale.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

As Callen now walked through the house towards the already noisy kitchen, he attempted to push back the feeling of unease he'd had since Gibbs had mentioned this weekend's event.

"Callen, don't tell me you actually slept in," Kensi called out as he entered the kitchen to find the team in its entirety, Hetty included. One look assured Kensi that sleep was the last thing he had been doing.

Gibbs handed him a cup of coffee, "Looks like you could use this."

Gratefully accepting the cup, Callen walked out onto the deck.

"G" Sam greeted looking over at him, "Did you get ANY sleep last night?"

"Some. Much as any other." Callen answered sipping his coffee, "So, has Gibbs given the plans for this weekend yet?"

"G, it's called relax… He's looking for us to spend time together."

"Why? We spend every day together."

Sam rolled his eyes, "Have you seriously forgotten what it is to just chill, relax?"

"Chill?" Callen smirked.

"Ch, shut it, G." Sam groused.

"Uncle Callen! You going to come watch me. Deeks and Eric are teaching me and Aiden how to surf, wanna come?"

"Hi there Kamran, maybe another time. I'm gonna just stay here and drink my coffee and what was it you called it, Sam? Chill?"

Sam raised a brow with another smirk before giving into a chuckle as his daughter rolled her eyes and giggled.

"Uncle Callen, you're funny.

"Hilarious" Sam agreed sarcastically.

Kamran gave a hug to both men, "I'm so glad you stayed, Uncle Callen."

Callen's smile faltered and Sam didn't miss it. The potential was still there for Kamran to be hurt by his leaving if things didn't work out. He would do whatever it took to prove to Callen, he needed to stay.

"I'm doing the best I can, Kamran," Callen whispered.

"I know." Came the soft reply before she pulled back and ran inside coming back with four bottles of water to take down to the beach for the others.

After surfing, they had grabbed the chairs and a cooler before they headed back down to the beach for the rest of the morning.

"Come on, Callen, sparring time," Ziva stated.

"Yeah man, I need a challenge. Two of you against me," Eliot pushed.

"Go on Callen, you can take him." Eric stated.

"I believe a challenge is a foot." Hetty remarked.

"She's got a point… We have NCIS, OSP, and Leverage." Gibbs added.

"Well, my money is on Ziva" Tony called out.

"Are you serious? You have never seen Eliot fight." Hardison bragged.

Callen simply rolled his eyes, "Yeah, no thanks."

"Team building weekend Agent Callen and YOU are team lead. Go… lead." Gibbs ordered.

With a resigned sigh and a look of disdain thrown Gibbs's way, Callen pulled himself from the chair and followed the others down to the beach.

"Are you sure that's the best idea, Jethro?" Hetty asked.

Gibbs chuckled, "Hetty, it got him off his butt… Nobody is winning that bet. I have seen the three of them in action. At the most, they will be exhausted when they are done and they will all be able to get more than a few hours of sleep without their demons chasing them. Did you not hear them all walking the halls last night? Bad enough with Callen… but three? It's a wonder any of us slept."

"Yes, well, Mr. Callen has a tendency to get caught up in his thoughts while fighting. It's a dangerous thing."

"Maybe, but Eliot and Ziva can handle themselves… and Callen needs to find a release for whatever they hell is bothering him lately."

Hetty gave a short nod as she took in the salty air, releasing it with a sigh.

From the deck, they watched as the group gathered in a circle as first Ziva then Eliot and finally Callen began battling one another as their 'audience' of friends cheered them on.

After the second launch that was made toward Callen, the voices faded away and his only thoughts were about his next series of strikes and watching his opponents moves.

The battle went on for nearly an hour but their teammates were steadfast in their support.

"They are good." Abby stated in awe, "I used to watch Callen and Ziva spar when he was working in DC… I loved watching them!"

"Wouldn't want to be the bad guys when they were around." Eric agreed, "Callen is scary when he gets going… but then so is Eliot."

"Never saw anyone fight as well as Eliot," Hardison stated, "until Callen was visiting."

"Callen visited?" Sam perked up.

"Yeah. Man is he intense, or what?" Hardison replied, "I don't think it was a planned visit, though. We ran into him at the bar we hang out at."

"Pfft!" Parker threw out, "You think? No one catches Eliot off guard but Callen did that day!"

"Parker!" Hardison warned gently.

"I like him!" she added, ignoring Hardison, "He's a good guy, just like Eliot is. Besides, Eliot even said so. He also said they hurt him." She explained then turned toward Sam. "You hurt him. Friends don't do that." She stated plainly.

"She's right." Abby spoke up then, "Callen trusted you and you just threw that away."

"Really? What about his part in this?" Sam retorted, wondering how Callen always managed to have these girls wrapped around his little finger. He knew it wasn't intentional. Callen would never boast being that important.

"He was doing his job." Eliot stated as he joined the group and took the bottle of water Hardison offered. He turned and watched as Ziva and Callen continued to spar, seemingly unaware of anything else. Eliot knew better and kept his voice low. "There's something you need to understand about him if you are going to make this work."

"What?" Kensi asked curiously as the group's attention shifted.

"Being an agent is a job to you. You come to work each day and you put in your time. Then, you go home to your lives, your families. The job… IS his life. It always has been. I have known Callen 25 plus years. He's gone through a pile of crap in that time, on top of his childhood. You need to cut him some slack." Eliot put the water down and headed back toward the fight, taking the opportunity to catch Callen off guard.

"How could they be friends all that time and me not know it?" Sam asked in shock. "I was his partner… I didn't know him at all."

"Awwww, don't feel bad, there's lots of stuff we don't know about Eliot" Parker piped up as Hardison nodded.

"Doesn't that bother you?" Nell asked in surprise.

"Seriously, I can't believe you didn't run a check on him or something." Eric said looking at the fellow hacker.

"Have you ever done a check on Callen?" Hardison asked in return.

Giving a sheepish grin as he thought back to the early days when he'd just met Callen and he'd helped save him from spending years in jail. He had tried several times to find something on the man but even with all his tricks and talents, he only ever hit one road block after another. "Yeah, point taken."

"Thought so," Hardison nodded, "They've done a lot of stuff and most of it will never be spoken of."

"And that doesn't bother your team? This not knowing what he might be hiding? Wondering where he is from and what skeletons might just come creeping out of his closet?" Deeks asked curiously.

"Skeletons in his closet?" Parker squealed

"Metaphorically speaking… sorry" Deeks shook his head.

"Well, yes." "No" Hardison and Parker answered in unison.

Parker looked over at Hardison quizzically. "I trust Eliot. We all have secrets. He keeps us safe… always! Eliot would never hurt us… I know that for sure. You don't hurt people you care about."

Hardison loved how despite all her antics, she was able to maintain some semblance of innocence. He returned the smile she cast him before explaining his answer, "I trust him too. He's never given me reason not to and he's saved our lives more times than I can count. But there are times when he gets this look… like he's remembering something really bad… when you know without asking that bad things have happened to him in his life and he doesn't take to being asked about it anymore than he likes being woke up. Don't EVER just wake him up unless you want a black eye and broken rib."

A soft laughter of understanding rippled through the group. They all had their dark memories but some of them more so than others.

Sam turned his attention to his partner, "Those three are a dangerous mix. I don't think anyone is going to win."

"G Callen is the only person I have ever seen get one over on Eliot," Parker quipped.

Things fell silent for a few moments before Sam started thinking again. Eliot wasn't the only one using the weekend to get to know the people in Callen's life. Sam was on his own fact-finding mission, "So, what is it your team does, exactly?"

"Classified" the answer came as a rumble from behind making them jump.

"Hey, Sparky!" Parker greeted.

"Parker!" Eliot growled.

"Give up?" Tony asked as the three plopped down onto the sand, grabbing cold bottles of water from the cooler.

"We do not give up" Ziva answered, "We were done."

Callen and Eliot shared a smirk between them.


	16. Chapter 16

**DISCLAIMER** **: Even today, I must say, I do not own any of the characters of NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: The presents have all been opened, the stockings have been unstuffed. The left overs have been sorted into the fridge and the company has come and gone. So, as I sit here happily thinking back on the days events and the memories made… I am content. So content, that I have decided to take a few minutes and post another chapter. I have to thank all of you who have taken the time to, not only read the story (I am VERY thankful for each and every reader), but those who took a moment to share their thoughts with me of where they think it's going, what they think MIGHT be going to happen next. I love hearing your thoughts. Sometimes, it gives me ideas for changing something that has been pestering me as well! Ha. (Thanks to altarp2408! I am working on it! 12)**

 **Merry Christmas!**

"Uncle Callen!" Kamran cried out, running up to the group… "Will you go with me to look for shells?"

"Sure, but mornings are best for that sort of thing."

"We can go then too," she added.

"Right."

Callen appreciated the chance to step away from the group, "If you will excuse us, we have shells to find."

"So how are you doing, Kam?" he asked.

"Okay, better now that you're here." She answered honestly.

"So, what's up, then?" Callen asked as he stooped to pick up a shell before tossing it into the surf.

"I kinda think I'm going crazy." Kamran replied with a tremble in her voice that stopped Callen cold in his tracks.

"What? Why? Why would you think that?" He asked.

Kamran plopped down on the sand, pulling her knees to her chest.

Following her lead, Callen, too, sat down next to her, his legs stretched out in front of him, resting back on his arms.

"This about your mom?" he asked, unsure of what to say.

"No. Well, maybe. Kind of? I don't know. I mean she's normally the one I would have talked to because daddy gets so worked up and over protective. Aiden just says I'm being paranoid. Maybe he's right. He says it's probably because of what happened to us because of that bad man who took me and hurt you."

Callen didn't like where this was headed, "So, you haven't talked to your dad? Don't you think you should?"

"Dad's a worrier now that mom's gone. He's finally gone back to work. I don't want to worry him."

"Okay… So, I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that this walk wasn't about shells." Callen nudged her with his shoulder.

Kamran rewarded his efforts with a small laugh, "No, Uncle Callen, not about shells. That stuff is for little kids."

"Oh, I see. So, what say you tell me what this is really about." Callen stated more seriously.

"I just… I know this sounds silly."

"Kam, you can tell me anything and I'll never think you're silly. I promise."

Kamran snuck a glance his way. There it was… HER Uncle Callen, who's promises were always kept.

Taking a deep breath, she blurted it out, "Sometimes, I feel like I'm being watched."

Callen quickly schooled his facial features as his entire body went on alert, "Really? When did this start?" he asked.

"Couple weeks ago, maybe longer."

"Have you actually seen anyone?" Callen asked again.

"Well, no… and I always do as you taught me. I watch people as I'm walking. I look around… and stay alert for anything or anyone out of place."

"That's good… keep doing that." Callen encouraged. Sam and Michelle had been good to teach their kids basic safety. They worked in a dangerous field that put all they hold dear in constant jeopardy. He never felt that Sam truly understood just how fragile an existence he lived until Michelle's death… and then he was completely lost. Callen had made sure to talk to both kids about keeping themselves safe. He taught them what to look for and what to do if someone approached them. He hoped with all that was in him that the kids would never need it but then just a short time later Kamran was taken not because of Sam but because of their connection with Callen. He would never forgive himself for that… and he would never take lightly any concern the kids had.

"Am I being paranoid? Or crazy? She asked nervously.

"No." Callen answered her.

"So, you think there's someone out there?" she asked, suddenly frightened.

"What? No! It's probably nothing. I mean, it is possible that it's due to what happened before. Have you been thinking about it?" Callen questioned.

"Not really. I mean, I really hadn't thought about it until this started happening."

Callen thought a moment… his mind was looking at all the angles while his heart stayed firmly planted with the young lady sitting next to him.

"Okay, well, it is possible that your mind has been dealing with what happened subconsciously and my being back may have simply brought it to the surface. I'm sorry, Kamran, for what happened that day. I'm not sure I ever said it, but I want you to know I am truly sorry."

"I know, It's not your fault, Uncle Callen. So, am I crazy then?"

"No, you most definitely are not crazy. I simply think you are working through some things…"

Kamran looked at him skeptically and Callen caught it and smiled.

"Okay, look… that being said, I will look into it… I'm not going to take any chances with your safety. You know that, right?"

Kamran gave a small nod.

"Okay, you go back to school on Monday?"

"Yes, we leave tomorrow evening." She confirmed.

"Okay then… I will do some checking and talk to you Monday when I'm done. Sound good?"

"Thank you, Uncle Callen" Kamran moved to her knees in order to give him a hug.

Callen tensed briefly but instantly relaxed and returned the hug. She had so much faith in him. If she only knew… her life would always be at risk so long as she was connected to him.

============================== BACK TO THE TEAM======================================

"That is so sweet." Abby stated, watching as Callen and Kamran walked along the beach looking at the shells before settling down to watch the waves roll in.

"They have a special relationship", Kensi agreed, casting a glance their direction, "I think it's adorable the way she has him wrapped around her little finger… the great lone wolf himself."

Sam watched with an ache in his heart. "She's missed him. He should never have been gone so long."

"Sam", Kensi stated struggling with the same feelings of guilt.

"No, Kensi. She's needed him here and I think he needs her too, he just doesn't realize it. All this time apart and it's only because I chased him away." Sam said angrily.

"WE chased him away." Kensi reiterated miserably.

"I didn't…" Deeks commented with a shrug when everyone looked at him, "What? I'm just saying. I was in a coma when this all happened… I just did what I was told… crap ensued and then you guys took over." Deeks finished with a big smile, followed by another shrug as he brushed the hair from his face.

Everyone just stared at him without saying anything. "You know how they say kids don't come with instructions?" Eliot asked drawing the groups attention.

"When did you ever have the opportunity to hear that, is what I want to know?" Hardison asked with a grin as Eliot scowled back.

"Shut up, Hardison… As I was saying, that goes double for Callen. Known the guy more than half my life and I still barely know him as a person. I would trust him with my life. I've had to on more than one occasion but I couldn't give a definitive answer to any personal detail of his life… because rather than allow you even a glimpse into his real self, he will give you a subjective answer… not a blatant lie. It has truth to it but it's not the whole truth."

"No kidding. If you looked up the word, enigma, in the dictionary you would find his picture next to the definition." Deeks quipped.

"It would be the only place you'd find his picture… trust me, I know." Eric muttered as Nell rubbed his back sympathetically.

"Eliot is correct. Callen has lived his life being rejected by people he trusted, losing people he loved. He learned quickly to not let anyone get too close. I can relate to that part of him very much as I believe Eliot does as well. Callen is an agent first. Always has been, always will be… and not by choice… working for Mossad is much like working for Blackguard. It is not an easy life. Callen and I have worked together on many occasions. I know Callen and Eliot have also been on many missions together, no?" Ziva asked looking across at Eliot who merely nodded as he looked out across the sand at the two lone figures sitting side by side watching the surf.

"We have seen many things, done many things and survived many things. Those experiences create the individuals you see before you. The only difference between us and Callen is that his training started the moment his mother died on that beach and he entered foster care. The fact that you expect him to change… to be more like you… it will never happen. He couldn't even if he wanted to. He is a Blackguard Renegade, just as I was Mossad, Kidon. We were ordered to kill enemies of our countries who were beyond reach of the law and would never go to trial. What we did was not illegal. Our governments tasked us with the ultimate responsibility of keeping its people safe. There are few others trained as well as these groups. We know more ways of killing people than you will ever know. Just as we are also trained in intelligence gathering by any means necessary."

The sharp intake of breath by the team members made her stop a moment and consider them thoughtfully.

"Perhaps I have said too much".

Eliot just rolled his eyes, "You think?" he muttered. It was more than he'd ever told his team or would have. He could see the look of shock on their faces but not the hate he had expected to find there. It not only surprised him but confused him as well… It would certainly not be a topic of conversation after today either. He knew Ziva enough to know she only did this herself for Callen's sake. The fact that the three of them even shared this bond was unique. If one of them were to have ever gone rogue, knowing what they know about their respective governments, they would have ultimately been given the task of silencing them by any means necessary… something he knew these people would not understand. He also knew if Callen ever found out about this conversation, he would not be happy.

Nell was the first to find her voice, "How… I mean, how could you… you know… I mean, as agents we have all… but… what you do… did… it's different."

Eliot shook his head at the roundabout question but also equally surprised that Nell would have ever been put in the position of using a service weapon. Then again, she was part of Callen's team and he would demand they all be able to protect themselves if they were to work with him. That's what surprised him most about this connection with Sam's kids, especially after Iosif. It wasn't like Callen to let anyone into his life that couldn't protect themselves but then he wasn't any different and from what he could see, neither was Ziva. She was obviously with this Tony Dinozzo and while he couldn't see the draw, the man was a good agent and well trained.

"Why is it any different? I see no difference. Is it because here you must play by the rules and there the only true rules for us were to get the job done and don't get caught?" Ziva asked plainly.

"Well…" Nells brows creased in thought.


	17. Chapter 17

**DISCLAIMER** **: Nope, not mine… Not Callen, Sam, Deeks, Kensi… Gibbs… Eliot… NONE OF THEM, from NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hello, welcome back for another episode of … 12 Thank you so much for all your reviews. For everyone taking the time to read, to favorite, to follow… and most definitely the reviews. I meant to have yesterday's up sooner but I kinda fell asleep… thankfully I didn't do any sleep typing while typing the Author's note or Disclaimer… that could prove disastrous. HA. Well, not much to cover so go ahead and have a read… please stop in and let me know what you think… and again, THANKS!**

"I think what she's wondering is how you live knowing your job is primarily a check list of get up and go torture this person, go kill that one and so on.", Deeks clarified, "I mean, yeah we use our guns as a last resort but you guys… Where's your conscience in all this?"

"Deeks!" Kensi squeaked as she elbowed him.

"What? It's a legitimate question and one that has bothered me ever since Callen joined… wait… you've known him for over 25 years and you've both crossed paths with him in the past repeatedly. Callen has only been with Blackguard for three or four years… which means…"

A low growl of frustration escaped Eliot as he spoke up, "which means… detective… you are delving into a whole lot of, none of your business. What is said here… stays here. Callen will not be happy if he finds out you are nosing into his past. Point is, he is and always will be on a whole different level than you. He can't be like you. He's tried pretending for your sakes and look where that ended."

Ziva's eyes narrowed slightly as a look passed between them.

"Eliot makes a good point and time is short. If you are to make amends and regain your friendships with Callen, you must accept that this is who he is. Accept that his life has always been complicated. What he has done, where he has been and what he has survived is who he is now. The person you knew four years ago is NOT the same person you have with you today. He couldn't be. The things he has done to others in the name of national security have been revisited on him for less admirable reasons. You asked about his conscience… you never hear him complain about his injuries whether physical or otherwise… he will never ask for help dealing with them. There is a reason…", Ziva explained as she looked at those around her before resting her gaze knowingly on Eliot.

"Of course, he doesn't, he's too stubborn," Sam scoffed.

"Yes, he is very stubborn but you are wrong. He requests no help or understanding because on some level he feels he deserves the pain and the scars as recompense for what he has had to do to others. It doesn't matter that these people were the worst of the worst and he was saving lives by doing it. It is a job that comes with… consequences."

"The fact that we are even having this conversation says it's one none of you could do. Be glad. It means you were blessed with better lives than us." Eliot grumbled.

"It takes people like you to allow people like us to have even the slightest chance at normalcy… happiness." Ziva looked at Tony with a smile.

"Listen to them. They know what Callen's struggling with first hand. I always knew some of what Ziva did and there's a whole lot more that I don't. That's okay because she knows she is loved and respected and if she ever needs to talk, she knows we are there for her. We will listen and we won't judge because we're not going anywhere. It's the long haul or not at all." Tony explained, taking her hand in his.

Hardison rolled his eyes, "Poetic, man… Truth is, we really don't know much about each other's past but we know enough. Eliot is always there when we need him and we are there when and if he needs us. No matter what."

"And what is it you do again?" Tony asked.

"Need to know and you don't need to know." Eliot stated forcefully.

"Callen is a good man who deserves better. Whether he shows it or not or even admits it to himself, he needs you. Accept him for who he is and not who you want to make him to be. Be okay with just knowing he has your back and have his in return. He'll keep your secrets even if he never trusts you with his. But… if he does… feel honored." Ziva stated.

"Just don't let him down again or you'll have me to deal with" Eliot growled.

"Yeah, that goes for me too!" Parker yelled out suddenly, garnering a questioning look from Eliot followed by the hint of a smile.

"He's MY friend too" Parker smiled.

================================== BACK ON THE BEACH =================================

"You're not telling my dad, right?" Kamran asked.

"Kam… hasn't there been enough secrets?" Callen asked as he stood up and offered her his hand.

"Please, Uncle Callen! He'll just get all worried and you said it's probably nothing. Plus, you're checking it out so… please, can we just wait?"

Callen pulled her up and shot a glance back at the group. They seemed pretty engrossed in something, "Fine… I'll keep it quiet until I finish checking it out."

"Thanks, Uncle Callen. I knew I could count on you." She cried, hugging him again.

They began their walk back and Callen bent down to pick something up. "Here."

"What?" she asked.

"A shell, in surprisingly good shape, actually. We got lucky and found one." Callen handed it to her but held on as she went to take it, "You are NEVER too old for shell hunting."

"Right." She smiled, holding it up "Thanks."

"Can't have them thinking there was more to this walk, now can we?" Callen's grin became forced as the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end and his stomach knotted… something wasn't right.

"What's wrong?" she asked, noting the change.

"What's what? Oh nothing. Look do me a favor, I have a call to make. Could you head back over to your dad? I'll be there in a minute."

"Oh, okay." Kamran waved as she ran back toward the group.

Callen turned and scanned the beach, taking in all the people milling around… checking out their faces while looking for someone familiar… looking for anything that stood out.


	18. Chapter 18

**DISCLAIMER : Same as it always is… they are none of them mine. They belong to lovely creators of NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. We won't get into how I'm feeling about the writers of at least one of the shows. ANYWAY… they aren't mine… I only get to borrow them for a little while.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE : Once again, thank you… Thank you for following and favoriting this story. Thank you for reading and so very, very much for the great reviews. I love hearing from you. Well, this is another short chapter. There are some longer ones in the future, I promise. Sometimes, as I start reading through the next chapter or two, I find it hard not to post more than one chapter. At the moment, I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do now that Christmas has passed and my Christmas story was based on the end results of this story and we are FAR from the end… I may just have to extend this one and throw it in there OR revamp it from being a Christmas story… seeing as we are only into spring at the moment here…. Go, read, you will understand what I mean… Hopefully, I will catch you at the end of this chapter with a review, maybe?**

Kamran joined the group, showing her dad the shell, they found, "Where's Aiden?" she asked.

"He went in the house a while ago. I think he was going to call a friend." Sam replied.

"Okay, I'm going to go show him… isn't it pretty?" she held it up so they could see it. "Uncle Callen found it for me." With that she was off and running toward the house.

Ziva looked to Eliot who turned and looked toward the direction of where their friend had been. Callen's stance was one of alert. As Callen made his way back toward the group, his shoulders tightened from the tension of knowing that once again everything he wanted or cared about was being put in danger because of him. Ziva didn't miss the look of anguish that was quickly replaced with that of a controlled agent.

He promptly planted himself next to Eliot and let out a soft sigh as he laid his head back against the chair and closed his eyes. "Something we need to talk about?" Eliot asked,

"Don't know what you're going on about." Callen replied, but the tension was evident.

"What's going on?" Sam asked. He noticed the edge that had crept into Callen's voice as he spoke to Eliot.

Callen took in a breath and as he released it, he quickly tucked away all the frustration and anger that was welling up in him and replaced it with what he thought they were all expecting from this relaxing weekend getaway of Gibbs's.

"What's going on is, I'm hungry and Eliot here owes me a lunch." Callen replied.

"Let's all head back to the house and clean up and then we'll eat. Just as soon as Callen helps me in the kitchen." Eliot smirked.

"Yeah, that's not going to happen. However, as it just so happens, I know of one person on this team that can cook… Deeks…" Callen stated. There was no way he was going to get cornered with Eliot at the moment. He was like Sam on steroids when it came to finding out what was bothering him. There was no doubt that they needed to talk but now and here was not it. Later.

"Deeks? Callen… don't you dare, man…"

"What? What about Deeks? What did I do?" Deeks asked as he looked for the source of his confusion.

"It's not what you've done, so much as what you're about to do, Babe." Kensi chuckled at the alarm on her husband's face.

"Callen, I'm warning you."

"Deeks, kitchen duty. Seems Eliot here could use some help with lunch." Callen ordered.

"Oh, is that all… sure, I can do that… what were you thinking?" Deeks started rambling on about a possible menu as Callen let out a rare but genuine laugh.

"You'll pay for this Callen."

"I've no doubt."

Eliot started toward the house. "Come on, Shaggy, let's get this over with."

"Really? You too, with the shaggy? I mean, I thought with the… ya know, your…" Deeks complained as Eliot shot him a threatening stare. "No, yeah, it's cool. Shaggy was cool, like me…" Deeks trailed off, letting out a breath of air as he followed Eliot the rest of the way in silence.

Lunch was done and over and everyone had only good things to say about Eliot's and Deeks cooking.

Callen leaned back in his chair lost in his thoughts… his blue eyes bright. It didn't go without notice but wisely no one brought attention to the near smile that lit up his features, making him look much younger. Callen's thoughts drifted back to all the team building events Hetty demanded they attend. They always drug their feet but seldom found them boring. They were a competitive bunch. He wondered if they continued it after he left.

Unsure of just how long he'd let himself reminisce or who may have noticed, he cleared his throat and got up from the table. He glanced around the room and excused himself to escape to the deck in order to once again check the perimeter.

The rest of the day passed with swimming and a beach volleyball tournament which Gibbs called mandatory when Callen attempted to decline the invite. In fact, even Gibbs, himself, joined in surprising his own team. Hetty and Kamran busied themselves with "other matters" as Hetty put it.

By the end, as they all sat around the bonfire making smores, Callen actually found himself almost relaxed and having fun.

Kamran, who had gone back into the house with Hetty came running up to the fire, breathless. Callen immediately tensed until she finally spoke, "Hey, Miss Hetty wants to show you all something. She needs you all at the house please."

Callen missed the looks being passed back and forth as he settled back into his seat as the group meandered their way back to the house.

"Uncle Callen?"

"Hey Aiden" Callen responded as he stared into the flames.

"Aren't you coming? Hetty kinda wanted us all."

"Nah, I'm a bit peopled out. Don't tend to socialize much."

"Didn't you have fun?" Aiden asked.

Callen looked over at the young man, "Well, yeah… I guess I did."

"You sound surprised." Aiden laughed and Callen joined him with a chuckle of his own.

"Like I said, my socializing skills are a bit rusty."

"Well, you survived this far, what's a few more minutes?" Aiden asked.

"Maybe in a bit", Callen replied, making no move to get up.

"Uncle Callen! Seriously?" Aiden shot back, taking Callen by surprise. Unsure of the motivation, Callen pulled himself up and followed Aiden to the house.

The house was full of noise and laughter until they heard them come in. Callen's defenses went on high alert "What? What's going on?"

Sam started grinning.

"Sam?" Callen asked.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" the room erupted in singing as Hetty lit the candles.

Callen stood staring at the cake, a pile of envelopes he assumed were cards lay next to it. He didn't even hear the song end.

"You waiting for the cake to melt?" Sam joked as the room filled with laughter.

Callen nervously looked around the room before blowing out the candles, then stepping back, his brows furrowed in thought.

"Callen, everything okay?" Kensi asked, concerned.

He looked up at her as his features softened, "Didn't realize today was my birthday."


	19. Chapter 19

**DISCLAIMER** **: NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage… they don't belong to me… never have, never will. Shame really. So, I am borrowing them for just a little bit… no harm, no foul.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Okay, this one is slightly longer than the last one… though not by much. If you like and are interested… it's a slow day and I might be encouraged to add another chapter tonight. Give me a heads up in your reviews and we will see what we can do! When I was rereading before posting yesterdays… I have to admit… even though I wrote the story… that last line of the chapter got to me. Poor guy. Okay, enough dawdling. Enjoy!**

The statement was simple but stark.

"Who forgets their own birthday?" Tony blurted before promptly receiving his second Gibbs slap of the day.

"Didn't forget so much as I just don't bother with it. No one else ever did." Callen answered, the second half almost a whisper.

"Mom made you birthday cakes." Kamran offered not realizing the knife-like effect it had on his heart.

'Yes, she did." He smiled at the girl.

"Look, for what it's worth, thank you…" he hated being the center of attention. As a kid it was a recipe for disaster. As an agent it could mean the difference between life and death… The rest of the time, he did his best just to blend in.

"Would you like to cut the cake, Mr. Callen?" Hetty asked.

"No, I'll let you have the honors." Callen replied.

"Very well. Why don't you sit down while I cut yours? Those cards are in lieu of gifts. Not having a home, we were uncertain as to what to buy."

"Well, you can't say you never got cards." Sam grinned to which Callen responded with a smirk of his own as he recalled the conversation they'd had so many years ago.

Callen took the offered pile of cards and went to the table. He was conflicted to say the least. He had tried so hard to keep them at a distance, but the familiarity of it all was making it difficult. He had been finding more and more that the desire for that connection they had once had was winning the battle for dominance over protecting himself from being hurt again.

He sat opening one card after another, reading the messages written inside each one. It was such a simple thing, birthday cards. He used to watch as kids from the foster families or the adults in his world now, even Sam's kids, would pass over the cards given them and go straight for the gifts. As he read and reread these cards, he knew they would never understand that these cards were more precious than any present they could have purchased. Each card came with a past memory or story or just how they felt about him.

"Penny for your thoughts," Kensi offered as she handed him his cake and sat down to eat her own.

"Think I told you once before they weren't worth that much." Callen put the cards back in a neat pile as he looked up with a smile, his eyes bright with emotion.

"I highly doubted it then and I highly doubt it now." She smiled sweetly, "Happy Birthday".

"Thanks, Kens."

"So, let me get this straight," Tony started as he joined them, "You forgot your birthday, how do you do that? I mean… who doesn't want the cake and presents."

Kensi gave Tony a dirty look then shot a sympathetic smile at Callen who shook his head and leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Not everyone, Tony, was blessed with birthday parties growing up… and for the past four years there hasn't been anyone to remember and quite frankly, I didn't care. If I want something, I buy it. If I want some cake, I eat cake. Pretty straight forward stuff there, Tony. Now, if you will excuse me." Callen picked up his cards shooting a quick smile at Kensi before walking away.

"Tony, if Gibbs had heard that, you would have broken your own record for 'Gibbs slaps'", Ziva said, sitting down next to him.

"What? I never knew anyone who didn't like their birthday." Tony stated defensively.

"Now you have." Sam said, walking up behind him as he watched his partner walk away, "Stick your foot in it again, did you?"

"I just don't… yes, apparently." Tony grimaced.

"Look, Callen grew up in foster care. They tend not to celebrate much. When we were working a case once, he admitted he'd never so much as received a card." Sam explained. What he couldn't stand hearing was just how alone he had really been the past four years. "After that, Michelle and Kamran made sure he had a birthday cake, cards, and presents every year."

"Did you see the look on his face when Kamran mentioned that?" Kensi asked sadly.

"Yeah… I spent so much time being angry with him, I never really stopped to think what he'd lost when Michelle died." Sam stated.

"Sam, she was your wife and the mother of your children… you had plenty to mourn and deal with. Callen understood that." Kensi soothed.

"Maybe…. But we kept telling him he was family. He lost a part of his family that day and then we kicked him to the curb. Did you hear what he said. These past four years he was completely isolated. He had no one."

"Not completely. I would hardly call myself no one." Ziva stated harshly.

"Sorry, three years." Sam corrected.

"Perhaps you should be talking to him about this." Gibbs interjected as he stood behind Ziva. "Callen doesn't view the world quite the same as the rest of us. He's more acquainted and comfortable with a solitary life than he should be. This weekend offers you a shot at that. Don't waste it."

Sam and Kensi exchanged looks. Gibbs was right and both knew that something had shifted over the last few weeks. "I'll talk to him tomorrow. I think he's probably done for the day. Things like this take a lot out of him." Sam assured the man.

"Hey, you seen Callen?" Eric asked coming up to the table.

"He was here a few minutes ago but stepped out for a breath of fresh air, I think." Kensi replied, "Everything okay, Eric?"

"What? Yeah… of course, everything is okay… I mean… yeah…. Why do you ask?" Eric responded trying to act nonchalant.

"You sure?" Sam asked warily.

"Yes, of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?" Eric answered again. "Well, gotta go."

"That was weird even for Eric." Kensi stated.

"Noticed that too, did you?" Sam replied, watching the retreating figure.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen found refuge in the library. As far as he knew, every one of Hetty's homes had a well-stocked library. When he was staying with her, it was one place he found peace. He could lose himself in the books.

He turned his head as the door opened, "Callen, you in here?" came a familiar voice.

"Eric?"

"Hey! I need to talk to you."

"Well, here I am. What's up?" Callen inquired.

"First of all, Happy Birthday."

"Thanks, Eric, now what do you need?"

"Okay, so, I have been playing around, attempting to get back into their database."

"Any luck?" Callen asked, more interested.

"Yes, and it's not good." Eric warned.

"What did you find, Eric?"

"The first list we looked at was not the original. I'm attempting to track it down. I found yet another copy though. Same basic list, only all but one name was crossed off. Each crossed off name had a date." Eric explained.

"Do we have a print off this time?" Callen asked.

Eric hesitated.

"Eric?" Callen asked, watching him closely.

Slowly Eric handed a paper over to him.

Callen took in the serious look on Eric's face before looking down. He remained silent as he read through the names.

"Eric."

"Yeah, like I said, I'm looking for the list's creator."

"Find them, Eric… you find them." Callen's voice was a mere whisper but it didn't hide the fear and anger Eric knew was there."

"I will, Callen, I swear."

Callen nodded, "So these names… why are they crossed out?"

"I ran a check on all the dates and names. Far as I can tell they all died on those dates." Eric answered.

"I'm the only name not crossed out, why?"

"You are the last one standing, except for…" Eric began,

"Eliot… but why is he crossed out? He is obviously not dead." Callen asked.


	20. Chapter 20

**DISCLAIMER** **: I don't own any of the characters from NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: A bit early for my normal posting but, I'll be honest, I'm bumming. Seems I'm trying to ward off a cold or some such nonsense… I'm so done with winter. Is everyone experiencing dreary weather where you are? UGH! Anyway! I decided to go ahead and put up a chapter… BONUS, this one is longer! I hope that's a good thing… I guess you could let me know in the little box at the bottom where one might be so inclined to leave a review… just sayin'…. Thank you to everyone who had favorited and followed and oh so much for the reviews. I have to say, I read your reviews and I have actually gone in and tweaked a few things because of it… A story is never TRULY done, is it?**

"You are the last one standing, except for…" Eric began,

"Eliot… but why is he crossed out? He is obviously not dead." Callen asked.

"Not sure. The date gives me nothing." Eric replied.

Callen looked at the date again and thought back. It was then he realized, it was back when they originally had been working together. "The date… it was a joint mission that went bad. Eliot disappeared. They thought he was dead. Guess in a way, he was. When I found him, it wasn't good. After that, he just walked away. He was done with the agency."

"So, what does that mean for you?" Eric asked.

"Good question. Do we know what happened to them all?"

"Yeah, I'll make a report for you."

"Good." Callen answered, distracted by the questions swirling through his head.

Eric's tablet rang out, causing the already on edge agent to be uncharacteristically surprised. "What the!"

"Sorry. That program is still running. It must have found something." Eric turned the tablet to face him and began tapping, "Ummm, Callen… I think they've figured out Eliot isn't dead…"

"What?" Callen grabbed the tablet.

"Look, the date… they made a note next to it." Eric pointed out the change… "Is it just me or does that make it sound…" Eric didn't finish. He didn't need to because Callen beat him to it.

"Planned? Yeah, it does, which makes me question all the others. Keep on it. In the meantime, we need to alert Eliot. We need to look into that possibility with the others and see what, if anything, is mentioned regarding family."

"On it…"

"Thanks, Eric. Hey, I'm going to have to be gone for a few days. Can I trust you to keep this between us? They will be on you. Can you handle it?" Callen asked skeptically.

"Sure… but don't you think I should go with you? I mean what if something else shows up. What if you need me?" Eric almost begged.

"Look, I'm just going to get Eliot, Hardison, and Parker to the airport and send them home… I have one more stop to make and then I will be back. I need you to stay here and keep an eye on things… and stay on this." Callen assured the younger man.

"I will. I'm sorry, Callen… about this."

"Don't be. I'm actually not surprised."

Eric left as Callen continued to stare at the paper and his phone where Eric had sent the update.

He knew he needed to tell Eliot but he also knew when he did, Eliot would need to go. Family came first. Sofie and Nate were clueless as to this mess. He needed to keep them safe.

====================================== KITCHEN ======================================

Eliot was in the kitchen helping Hetty clean up.

"I guess it is safe to say we surprised our Mr. Callen, would you agree?" Hetty asked.

"I would… impressive that no one was injured in the process." Eliot replied with a chuckle.

"I beg your pardon, Mr. Spencer."

"Surprises are not something he normally takes to. You're lucky he didn't duck out." Eliot explained.

"Yes, I see what you mean. Though, had he known up front he most certainly would have gone into hiding." Hetty smiled.

Eliot said nothing more on the subject. Callen was a private person. He didn't like surprises. He didn't do holidays…

"Mr. Spencer… I'm curious. Why would an agent, such as yourself, go to work with a group of known criminals?"

Eliot looked over at the small but slightly intimidating woman next to him, "That's no one's business but mine," he replied.

"True enough…" Hetty waited, quietly almost knowingly.

"Look, they made mistakes… Some people aren't so blessed in life as to have family and people who care. Some have that but lose it and some have been hurt so bad they wouldn't trust it if they did have that support. There are many reasons for how people get on the wrong path. These guys realized they weren't getting anywhere with their respective paths… but those paths are what brought us together. What we do, matters. It matters to all those people who would be left with no recourse. It may not right all our wrongs but I'd like to think it helps us in the karma department if only a little." Eliot explained.

"Believe it or not, Mr. Spencer, but I happen to agree and support what you do. We can be a bit unconventional at times here as well." Hetty smiled at the sober man.

"You realize, under different circumstances, Callen could have been a great grifter…"

"I dare say, you are correct. In fact, Mr. Callen could have done the job of just about any member of your team… He was quite the little thief as a boy… still is when he finds the need." Hetty chuckled at the memory of him lifting her resignation from Leon Vance's pocket. "So, Mr. Callen visited you. Has he met your whole team?"

"Yes… just so you know, they encouraged him to come try again… give you a second chance." Eliot offered, surprising Hetty that Callen had shared with anyone what happened.

"He didn't give any details, but enough to know the only family he'd ever really had was dissolving."

"Ahhhh, yes. We made some very big mistakes ourselves, I'm afraid." Hetty admitted.

"This…. This here, it was good for him. I don't know what you did exactly, but you have a second chance. Don't waste it. Two rounds with Blackguard is enough. He may not survive another." Eliot warned.

"Two?" Hetty asked alarmed. "When was Mr. Callen with Blackguard before?" She hated these kinds of surprises.

"Unofficially actuallly. The original Blackguard. Fresh from the military. We did black ops and from time to time we were called in on one of their missions. Above your paygrade, Miss Lange. Nearly got us both killed in the process. He saved my ass back then."

"I see. Well, I thank you for your help and the informative chat, Mr. Spencer."

"You are welcome. One more piece of advice, if I may?"

"Of course," Hetty agreed.

"Whatever secrets you're keeping from him with the misguided belief it's for his safety. They do you no favors in your effort to garner another chance with him."

"I will think on that, Mr. Spencer. Now, I best see to our guests." Hetty excused herself then, leaving Eliot to his thoughts.

He leaned back against the counter while folding the towel he had been drying dishes with and placing it next to him as he watched Hetty leave. He hoped she would take his warning seriously but from everything he had heard about the diminutive leader, he doubted it. He wanted his friend to find what he had found… a family. It was then that he experienced his own Ah-ha moment. He had found a family. They were a bumbling bunch of misfits on a normal day but they were HIS bumbling bunch of misfits. They understood each other… they cared about each other. Nothing and no one came after one without having to deal with the rest. Yes, he wanted that for Callen and he believed with everything in him that these people, here, were just that. The only problem now was convincing Callen of that fact.

Moments later the door opened to none other than the subject of his thoughts.

"There you are." Callen sighed.

"Here I am, what's up?" Eliot asked, not liking the tone.

"Eric was checking on a program he created to bypass their security system…"

Eliot scoffed, "Wait… he figured out the Steranko Security Protocol?"

"Yeah, I guess." Callen answered.

"That's going to blow Hardison's mind." Eliot laughed.

"OOOOkay." Callen replied, "Look, he found some things."

"What things?" Eliot asked immediately on alert.

"The list, for one… only this one has names crossed out with dates next to them… including yours", Callen handed the paper over.

"Do we know what the dates stand for?" Eliot looked up.

"The dates they died." He answered, "Think about the date on yours".

"Well, we knew they thought I was dead… but you are the only one left… what's with that?"

"Yeah, I don't know. This came in while we were talking. They know you're alive. This list is no longer inactive. Whoever started it, is still meddling or someone else is. That's not all. There are several names on that list that I am familiar with. I'm not the only one either."

"What are you saying?" Eliot asked, not sure if he wanted to know.

"Hetty. There are at least 3 other names that are very familiar to Hetty as well. Who knows how many others." Callen explained.

"Callen, are you suggesting…" Eliot began, watching his friend bristle at the implication.

"I'm not suggesting anything, but I find it interesting that a few years before I left NCIS, she and I had a discussion regarding 'Raven's and Swans' and was that her plan when she took in all these orphans through the years."

"And was that the case?" he asked.

"She denied it… obviously," Callen scowled.

"You don't believe her." Eliot said more than asked.

"I don't know what to believe at this point, but it's not looking very positive in her favor. If I find out she had something to do with this..." Callen growled.

"Hold on. There's nothing here that couldn't be considered… coincidental."

"Once is coincidental, twice is happenstance, third time is enemy action. She took, at the very least, four of these names under her wing." Callen charged.

Eliot did not like the tone of the conversation especially after the one he just had with Hetty.

"So, what do we do about this list?"

"Do? I don't know yet. Eric is still searching, but Eliot, that note leaves little to the imagination. It's looking like some of the dates, at least, were actually planned hits."

"Jumping the gun, don't you think?" Eliot stated.

"Hardly, these two here? I know for a fact that these two were hits." Callen's voice tightened around the words.

"Why? What makes you think that?" Eliot asked, noticing the change in the man before him… shoulders tense, back straight, rubbing his index finger against his thumb. Callen was always stoic in his approach to life. He never let anything show. The fact that despite all that, he could see the self-loathing eating at him…

"Because, I was the one who did it."


	21. Chapter 21

**DISCLAIMER** **: I hold no rights to the characters belonging to NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! I love hearing from you all so much. Thank you for the review and messages! It truly does mean so much to me. When you share your thoughts on what you think is happening or what might be coming? I have so many new ideas for future stories… Assuming you want to read them… ANYHOO! Thank you to all who favorited and followed! We are only just beginning here. There is so much more to come! I hope you enjoy! As always, let me know what you think!**

"Because, I was the one given the job. I had no reason not to believe them." Callen's skin was crawling with the pent-up tension.

"Maybe they did."

"Eliot, they gave me bogus files. I had no idea they were agents. You need to take Hardison and Parker and go… go home. Find Nate and Sofie. Keep them safe."

"I'm not going anywhere… you need all the help you can get." Eliot argued.

"You need to protect your team. Family comes first. If they are coming after you… they will use them to do it." Callen pushed back.

"They can come here. We tell your team and Gibbs. Circle the Wagons." Eliot refused to back down.

Callen's frustration hit boiling point. "Listen to me. You have a good thing going. You're surrounded by good people. People who care about you. You were free and clear till I got you involved. Now, it's all in jeopardy. Go home Spencer. Keep them safe. Family first… and you will NOT involve this team. It's enough that Eric is. Get them packed and I will get you out after everyone goes to bed.

"Callen."

"No more discussion! I already have the blood of those two agents on my hands. I don't need that of yours and your team's as well. I will be fine." Callen's hardened voice caught him by surprise.

"Yeah, I'm not so sure about that…"

"They should be out by 0200 be back down here by then."

Eliot didn't like the idea of leaving his friend but if Callen was right…he needed to keep his team safe… and Callen's gut was seldom wrong.

He gave Eliot time to join back up with the others before heading to the quiet solitude of his room.

Eliot followed the noise out onto the deck. The feeling of fun and laughter had long faded away for him and he was pretty sure it was the same for Callen, especially considering his suspicions of Hetty. He shot a look in the woman's direction. He knew she cared for Callen. He also knew if Callen was right, it wouldn't matter, she wouldn't get another chance.

Hetty noticed the hardened look she received from the man she had just spoken with and felt they had an understanding between them in regard to her team lead. What had happened in the short period of time to change that?

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

2:00 a.m. found the house bathed in silence but for the four figures with bags in hand as they made their way out the back door.

Callen drove them through the city until he was certain they had lost their tail before heading to the airport. Nothing was said throughout the drive there.

"Callen." Eliot started.

"Take care Spencer… Keep them safe." Callen held his hand out as Eliot grabbed it, pulling him in for a brotherly hug, "I'm sorry for pulling you into this."

"Don't be. We all need help once in a while. I'll get these guys back and get them all somewhere safe and then I can come back." Eliot stated.

"Not necessary. They need you more. Just watch your back. They're going to be on the hunt."

Callen shook hands with Hardison before turning to Parker. He offered her a small smile. "Take care of him for me, okay?"

"You take care of you." Parker added with a hug, "I like you, G Callen".

Callen couldn't help the chuckle that rose up as he answered, "I like you too, Parker."

He watched as they headed into the building before getting back into his car and driving away… to where, he wasn't sure.

"We really going to leave?" Hardison asked disbelievingly.

"Hell, no." Eliot growled, "But we do need to take care of Nate and Sofie. Let's find some place to stay and we'll go from there." Eliot lead the pair back out into the cool March night air with Parker following along behind clapping excitedly.

Once they got their rental car, Eliot began looking for their temporary residence. He knew, from Callen, where to look. He just had to figure out where Callen had gone. It had not escaped his notice that they weren't the only ones to have packed their stuff when they left the cottage. Callen had his duffel and bedroll in hand. He knew once he realized the tail had found him, it would only be a matter of time. For the moment, Callen had mentioned checking out Kamran's school. He doubted they would see him before Tuesday… which would have the OSP up in arms. In a way, Eliot couldn't blame them, but he tried to tell them that Callen would never relate quite the same way to situations as the rest of them. Now he worried if this would be the straw that broke the camel's back in regards to the team taking him back.

For now, he needed to get them settled and contact Nate and Sofie. Once he knew they were safe, he would then concentrate his efforts on Blackguard.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen chose to drive the nearly six hours to the kid's school in order to clear his head and consider his options. He had promised Kamran he'd look into it, and he would. He also needed to touch base with Aiden. He realized he'd be in trouble once he got back. He'd left a message on Hetty's phone that he needed a few days off. It wasn't enough to save him from his partner's wrath, however. Sam would be demanding answers to which he'd not get the one's he wanted. He had asked Callen when he came back how long till he pulled another disappearing act. He felt bad for disappointing them. They had done nothing but try. If anything, he owed them a little more effort on his part and when, or perhaps, if he handled this latest intrusion to his life, he hoped, perhaps, to have the opportunity to try and truly make this work. He was aware that he may very well burn those bridges before then. The only solace he would take away was that they would all be safe.

Some days he simply felt too old for his years.


	22. Chapter 22

**DISCLAIMER** **: I do not own any of the characters from NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: HAPPY NEW YEAR! Thanks to everyone who has been kind enough to take the time to read this story, to follow and favorite and most definitely for leaving your wonderful reviews. Please do me a favor and give this a read and let me know what you think.**

Sunday morning greeted them with warm sunshine and the smell of tea, coffee and pancakes. Gradually, the dining room filled with chatting and laughter. When Hetty and Abby brought the trays of pancakes and beverages.

"Where is Mr. Callen? I made his favorite, blueberry." Hetty asked.

"Good question," Gibbs stated with a look to Ziva and Abby… a knot forming in his gut, "Seems his friends are late to the table as well."

"We'll go check" Abby offered as Ziva joined her.

It was only a few moments later that Ziva returned, "Eliot and his friends are gone… bags and all."

Abby returned shortly after, clearly upset, "He's gone, Gibbs. His bag and everything! Where would he go?"

Gibbs tossed his silverware on the table with an angry grunt as he fell back in his chair, shooting an exasperated look toward Hetty who returned the look with a pinched expression.

"I knew it!" Sam growled, "I knew he would take off."

"Sam, we don't know what's going on yet." Kensi offered.

"I don't care. I have two kids coming down soon… I don't want them to know he's abandoned them again. You hear me?" Sam pushed away from the table nearly toppling his chair as he stormed out.

"Damn it, Callen!" Gibbs grumbled as he too exited the room.

"He's coming back…right?" Abby asked openly, hoping someone would give her the answer she wanted to hear.

"Who?" Aiden asked taking in the mood of the room, "What's going on?"

"Hey! Morning!" Kamran greeted, "Pancakes! Uncle Callen loves blueberry pancakes… did he eat his already?" she bubbled up.

"Good morning, Miss Hanna. No, I'm afraid, Mr. Callen has not eaten as yet." Hetty answered giving a warning look around the table.

"Oh, weird. We're supposed to go for a walk after breakfast. He better hurry before we have to leave."

"Kamran, Callen had to go out unexpectedly…" Kensi started.

"Oh… where did he go?" she asked, an edge of worry in her voice.

"Uh, where did he go? Well, he had to take Eliot, Hardison and Parker somewhere. Something came up and they had to take care of it today. But hey, gives us extra surf time, interested?" Deeks offered.

"Sure, let me get my swimsuit on." Kamran ran back down the hall toward the stairs, passing her dad as she went, "Morning Daddy! I'm going to surf with Deeks and Eric, Okay?"

"Sure baby. Make sure you let your breakfast sit for a bit first." Sam replied, watching her taking the steps two at a time, "Careful on the steps!" he called after her."

"K Daddy!" was all he heard as she disappeared at the top of the steps before he turned and headed back into the dining room catching Gibbs as he came in the back door, pocketing his phone.

"You find out where his is?" Sam asked.

"Went to voicemail…" Gibbs replied, clearly still angry.

"Do you have any clue what he's into now?" Sam watched the anger switch to that of concern.

"Not a clue… but whatever it is, isn't good. He's been on edge for a couple months now and I can almost guarantee this Eliot is involved. Callen doesn't just visit and hang out with friends.

"Tell me about it." Sam muttered, "We are trying here… I'm just not sure he cares. I'm not sure he wants it."

"Don't jump the gun, Sam… not until we know more. But for the record, I have to agree. He is messing this up and he doesn't seem to care."

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Aiden watched his sister run off to change, completely trusting and he knew it was all a lie, "You're lying," Aiden stated, his tone matter of fact.

"I beg your pardon, Mr. Hanna." Hetty asked.

"Come on. You telling me you have a clue where Uncle Callen went this time?" He looked around the room. "Yeah, I didn't think so." Aiden grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl and took a bite as he strode back out of the room.

Sam and Gibbs walked in just as Aiden left.

"Gibbs,"

"No, Abby. I didn't find him but I'm going to knock him on his ass when I do."

"Well, Sam, at least one bought the lie." Deeks stated.

"I wouldn't count on it. She just isn't panicked yet. When she doesn't hear from him in a few days it will set in." Sam wiped a hand over his face. The day had only just started but already he was exhausted.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Eliot found a deal on a short-term rental to hold them for a while. He had contacted Nate and Sofie and explained what was going on and Nate was no happier with Callen's involvement than the LA team was with Eliot's. Truth was, neither team had the whole story. Still, Nate trusted Eliot enough not to risk the safety of the team, so they would join them in LA as Eliot asked. Eliot's only remaining concern was keeping them from contacting anyone else. Once he knew they were safe, he would go after whoever this creator of the list was. For Callen's sake he prayed it wasn't Hetty.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

"Jethro, cup of coffee before I leave?" Hetty asked, later that evening.

"Sure." Gibbs sat down at the table across from Hetty, accepting the offered cup.

They drank their respective drinks in silence, each lost in thought until frustration got the better of Gibbs.

"What the hell is he thinking, Hetty? Taking off without a word? No thought to those kids… his team?"

Hetty smiled fondly at the man before her, who in turn narrowed his eyes, "What do you have to smile about, exactly?"

"Relax Jethro, I smile at the fact that Mr. Callen has spent his life looking for the blood version of what he unwittingly created for himself over his lifetime. They just keep crawling out of the woodwork," Hetty replied, "And he hasn't exactly disappeared either."

"What are you talking about?" Gibbs asked.

"Mr. Callen left a message on my phone. A non-descript message mind you, but a message none the less. While you were saying goodbye to our guests, I was busy gathering wolfberries for my tea when I checked my phone… he simply said he needed a few days." Hetty explained.

"Wolf…?" Gibbs shook his head… Only Hetty…, "You call him back?"

"Jethro, you know as well as I do, that phone will mysteriously lose its battery until such time as he returns." Hetty took a sip of her tea as she studied Gibbs reaction.

"Sometimes I just want to…" Gibbs began, "Hetty, this team has every right to rip him a new one. They are trying and he's being an ass."

"Calm down, Jethro. You're starting to sound like his father here." Hetty smiled.

"He could use one… Let's face it, the one he has isn't acting like one." He scowled in return.

"Yes, well, I'm a bit concerned that we've not heard from Garrison. Arkady hasn't heard anything either."

"When has he ever been around when his son needed him most?"

"Jethro, that's neither here nor there. Callen is in no danger here. He's merely trying to find his way home. This isn't easy for anyone… especially him. You saw how he was last night. He enjoyed himself in spite of it all. Give it time." She finished her tea and rose, "Good night Agent Gibbs."

"Good night, Hetty." Gibbs replied as he shut and locked the door behind her. He waited and watched yet knew better than to think Callen would be back.


	23. Chapter 23

**DISCLAIMER** **: I do not own any of the characters for NCIS LA, NCIS, or Leverage.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: I debated whether to post one again tonight or wait till tomorrow… but I figured, the story is done… no good reason not to. Hope you are still enjoying it. I've tweaked it as we have gone along… my mind is spinning with ideas! Please let me know what your thoughts are. It does matter to me. Thank you so much to all the new followers and for the Favorites, as well. Once more, thank you! Thank you for all the wonderful reviews and messages. I read them all and try to respond to each of them. I hope I didn't miss anyone. They make my day! Well, here you go.**

"Good night, Hetty." Gibbs replied as he shut and locked the door behind her. He waited and watched yet knowing better than to think Callen would be back. He had already spoken to Leon, who was no happier than the rest of them.

"There's been some chatter that would suggest Agent Callen may be looking into some things. Things that could prove disastrous if he continues" Leon stated cryptically.

"What things, Leon?" Gibbs demanded.

"I can't say. I'm waiting for further confirmation. All I CAN say, is that someone is snooping into the CIA databases and they are good… too good."

"And this ties to Callen, how exactly?"

"That's just it… I'm not convinced it does. However, there is some question as to the hacker… more than one, actually. One is good enough that he managed his way around a Steranko Security System. A system that up until now has proved impenetrable. I only know of one hacker smart enough to pull that off…"

"Eric Beale" Gibbs answered, "Any evidence to back that up?"

"No, which is why I want you there. Watch only, until we have more to go on."

"I get it. Stay in touch Leon. I don't know what the hell he has gotten himself into this time but I'm very concerned that it could be the straw that broke the camel's back here. The team is not happy with this latest stunt and I don't blame them." Gibbs stated before hanging up. He walked out to the deck and stared out at the ocean, wishing for the same peace his friend claimed to find, "Where the hell are you and what are you up to?" he mumbled into the breeze.

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Callen spent Monday watching Kamran's movements, looking for anything or anyone out of the norm. It wasn't until Kamran texted him that he found what he was looking for.

"Uncle Callen? Are you here?"

"Hey Kam. Told you I would be. What's up?"

"Remember when I told you I felt like someone was watching me?" she asked.

"Yeah, that's why I'm here… Remember?" he grinned at the phone.

"I think they are here…" she replied nervously, ignoring his attempt at banter.

Callen immediately switched from texting to calling her. He was amazed at her ability to feel her surroundings so intently, she was a natural. Immediately he began scanning the area as he replied, "Do you see anyone?"

"I'm not sure. There's a guy in a black suit. I think I may have seen him before," she answered.

"Okay, that's good. I need you to ignore him. Just do what you need to do. I'm right here. Nothing is going to happen to you, okay?"

"Okay, Thank you, Uncle Callen."

Callen continued to watch throughout the afternoon when once again the suit showed himself, only this time Callen made his move. Taking the man in a headlock before speaking directly into his ear, his voice low, "who are you and why are you following Kamran Hanna?!"

"What are you talking…"

"Wrong answer," Callen tightened his grip on the man, "Last chance… next squeeze breaks your neck. Now, who are you working for and why are you following Miss Hanna."

The man grasped at Callen's arm in an attempt to loosen his grip. The more he struggled the stronger the grip became. "I don't know why, I was just told to watch her."

"By who?" Callen hissed.

"CIA… only they had a slight Russian accent, I think. No name. Just a check and an order."

"How do you report back?" Callen demanded.

"They contact me," the man replied, struggling to turn his head enough to see who his attacker was.

Callen's mind spun, trying to process the information. Why would the CIA be interested in Kamran? Turning his attentions once more to his captive, "Your job here is done. You hear me? You tell your boss the girl is untouchable. Anyone and I mean anyone," he tightened the hold even more till the man's eyes widened in fright, "You or anyone else so much as thinks about going after her and I will kill them. Do we understand each other?" he growled.

He received a small grunt for his answer. Callen released the man with a shove. As the man gained his balance and rubbed his neck, he turned toward his assailant, "and who do I say is demanding…" he asked before realizing he was once more alone. It took only a moment of thought for him to come to the realization of who this aggressive unknown really was and when he did, a chill ran the length of his spine… could it have been the elusive, 'Ghost'? A name spoken of only in whispers because few truly knew who he was but everyone knew what he could do. Crossing him was not something you wanted to do. He was honest with his answers and money or no money, this job was not worth the pain this guy had promised if he stuck around. He wasn't stupid… he was done.

Callen watched the man leave. He believed his answers… which meant he was no closer than before. At least for the moment, Kamran was free of her stalker. Putting aside the fact he didn't know what to do next, he headed for his car.

"Hey Kamran, meet at our spot in the park?" Callen texted.

"Sure," was the immediate response.

Callen sat in the warm spring sun as he waited for Kamran. Keeping a tight vigil on his surroundings, he quickly put the battery in his work phone. He wasn't surprised by the amount of missed calls and didn't bother with listening to the numerous messages. He knew all too well who the messages were from and what they said. Neither was he surprised that it immediately began ringing. Just as quickly, he removed the battery once more and tucked both into his jacket pocket. After another look around, he finally caught sight of the girl.

"Hey Uncle Callen," Kamran greeted with a hug.

"Hey, Banana Hanna" Called teased, smiling at the over exaggerated roll of her eyes.

"I'm not a little girl anymore, Uncle Callen." she scolded.

Callen sobered, "No, no you are not."

"Thank you for coming," she offered.

"Always. So, I did as I promised. I think you should be fine now."

"So, there WAS someone following me?" she asked, suddenly scared once more.

Callen was quick to catch the look of fear that flashed across her face, "It was a misunderstanding."

"Really?" she asked skeptically.

"He was supposed to watch some girl for her parents. You know all about over protective parents." Callen lied with a smile.

"So that's it?" she asked worriedly.

That's it… but if you ever need me… You know I'll be here, right?"

"Yes, always." Kamran answered sincerely.

Callen merely nodded as he stood, "Well, I better be getting back."

"Already?" Kamran looked up at him sadly, "I guess daddy is still pretty mad at you, huh?"

"Still?" Callen asked curiously.

"Well, he seemed upset because you left so early this weekend without even saying good-bye."

"Yeah, something came up. Sorry we didn't get that walk on the beach but then you did say you were too grown up for shell hunting" Callen gave her a small understanding smile.

"Maybe I was wrong." Kamran stated shyly.

"Hey, I was gone for four years. Things continued forward even without me. I know that. You grew up. It's okay. I just need to figure things out."

Kamran heard the sorrow in his voice. "Uncle Callen, I didn't grow up THAT much. I actually like shells and…" she giggled nervously, "and… I like my nickname. You are the only one who calls me that. I missed it while you were gone. Please don't stop. I will always be your 'Banana Hanna," she grinned.

Tilting his head slightly he regarded her for a moment, "Kam, it's okay. I need to start treating you less like the little girl you were when I left and more like the young lady you have become."

Kamran grabbed him in a hug. "Please, Uncle Callen. Don't ever stop calling me your Banana Hanna… and I really do want to go shell hunting with you. Promise?"

Callen returned the hug and smiled as he whispered, "I promise."

"Good… I have to go, I have a class pretty soon. Love you, Uncle Callen," she waited for his reply.

Callen grinned, "Love you too, Banana Hanna."

"Hope dad doesn't get too mad at you for being gone." she offered.

"No worries, I'm used to it," he smirked. He waved as she turned and ran back toward the school before he took his phone out and called Aiden.

"Yeah" came the answer.

"Aiden?" Callen asked curiously.

"Hey Uncle Callen… you back?" he asked moodily.

"Back?"

"You left the house and didn't tell anyone. They weren't happy. So, where were you?" Aiden asked.

Callen picked up on the anger in his voice. "An emergency came up…"

"And you couldn't leave a note?" Came the now expected reply. Shaking off the ever-building guilt, he pushed forward, "I'm sitting in the coffee shop down the road… join me." It wasn't a question so much as a demand.

"Maybe I'm busy," Aiden challenged. He was in no mood to make it easy on the man.

"No, you're not. Coffee's on me. See you in five." Callen responded before disconnecting the call.

Aiden stared at the phone for a moment before a grin lit up his face as he grabbed his jacket and ran out the door. As he neared the coffee shop, he slowed his steps and while he was glad to see him, Aiden schooled his features, he didn't like seeing his sister hurt and Callen had the greatest potential of doing that.

He didn't look up as the door opened. Sitting with his back to the wall, he was leaned back in his chair, legs crossed, reading a newspaper, but Aiden knew better. As he approached the table, Callen put his coffee cup down and began folding his paper as he greeted him.

"You made good time."

"Not that far… and thanks" he took a sip of the coffee Callen had ordered for him, "You remembered what I liked."

"I did. Just wasn't sure if it was still accurate. Tastes can change in four years." Callen replied rubbing his finger over a spot on the table.

"Some things… still, it's my go to coffee. So, what brings you here?" Aiden asked.

Callen looked across the table at the young man, "You are a lot like your dad… Alright, the reason I left yesterday was to get my friends on their way home… then I came here to check out what was going on with Kam."

"She told you?" Aiden asked, surprised.

"Yes, she tells me you didn't believe her?" Callen raised a brow.

"Wha… well, after what happened with you, I figured it was just her imagination. I mean, what's the chances it would happen again?" Aiden asked.

"Aiden, this is your sister… You, of all people, should have her back."

"So, what did you find out?" Aiden asked, not responding to the chastisement.

"I dealt with it… for now." Callen replied.

"Are you telling me she was right?" Aiden asked, shocked.

"I told her it was a mistake… I also haven't discussed it with your dad yet."

"Don't… Please. He's finally getting his life back. He doesn't need this." Aiden pleaded.

"Your dad is a lot stronger than you give him credit for. Last time I kept him in the dark didn't end well for anyone." Callen replied.

"I swear, I will do better… I will."

Callen considered the boy in front of him… only he wasn't a boy anymore. He had grown a lot in the past four years. Giving a sigh he considered the options, "Fine, for now… but you stay close and observant. You notice anything and I mean ANYTHING, you get ahold of me."

"Yes, sir."

"Alright… So, how's school going?" Callen changed the subject.

"Fine."

"Good."

They sat in silence for just a moment more.

"So, on a scale of one to ten… ten being the worst… What am I walking into?" Callen asked sheepishly.

"At least a ten… maybe even an eleven or twelve." Aiden replied chuckling at the look that crossed Callen's face, "In their defense, you did leave unannounced. Dad figures you ran again."

"Yeah?"

"I think they'll just be glad you're alive." Aiden assured him.

"I doubt that. But thanks anyway," Callen smirked. "I best be heading back, though. No sense pushing my luck."

"Good luck," Aiden offered as he finished his coffee and stood to follow him out.

"Thanks, Uncle Callen."

Turning back with a questioning glance, Callen asked, "for what?"

"Everything. For being there." Aiden shrugged, followed by a wave as he turned to jog away, leaving Callen standing there uncertain. Thank you were two words he seldom heard. Usually he was getting reamed out for his approach. He was okay with it, so long as the end result meant those he cared about were safe, but every now and again, he found himself taken off guard… like today… shaking his head he took a quick glance around at his surroundings before heading for his car and the long drive back to LA.


	24. Chapter 24

**DISCLAIMER** **: No, I do not hold any claim to the characters of NCIS LA/NCIS/Leverage.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi there! Thanks for coming back. Thank you for the favorites, the followers, and so very much for the reviews. Seeing where you all think this might be heading is soooooo much fun. Intriguing even. Right or wrong as you may be with your ideas on this particular story… I have loads of new ideas for future ones… so thank you for that, as well. There are sooooooooooooooooooo many possibilities for where this could go now… and we haven't even gotten to the crux of it yet… YAY! Well, here you go… As always, please leave me a message… tell me what your thoughts are on the direction of things. I would love to hear. Have a great day!**

The drive back did little to calm his spirits. The CIA? By all rights he SHOULD be telling Sam. Hadn't he already put her in enough danger? Then there was Sam. He had already warned him about keeping things from him in regards to his children. He also understood where the kids were coming from. Still, Sam was right and Callen knew it… but until he knew more there wasn't anything anyone could do but worry. He had to admit, he was more than a little nervous. He knew they were going to be angry and Hetty had every right to send him packing. And, of course, there was Gibbs to consider. Up until recently, Gibbs had been at his back but now? He was pretty sure Gibbs was going to be every bit as angry as the rest… and he couldn't blame him. Things were getting way too complicated at this point… Not knowing who he could trust and who he needed to keep safe was taking its toll on his nerves. Rolling his eyes, he climbed out of his car while grabbing his duffel and after taking in a deep breath, he opened the doors, readying himself for whatever awaited him on the other side.

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"Still nothing?" Gibbs asked as he sat in front of Hetty's desk.

"Nothing, I'm afraid. I'm worried, Jethro, that Mr. Callen may never be able to find a place for himself here… I don't believe he ever did or we wouldn't be having this conversation today. His inability to ever trust has kept a permanent wedge in any and all of his relationships." Hetty replied sadly. "His mother would have been so saddened by the prospect".

"Team's not doing too well, either." Gibbs acknowledged.

"No, between Kensi's concern, Sam's anger, and I'm not certain WHERE Mr. Deeks stands", she answered, sipping her tea, "To be honest, I think Mr. Deeks probably has a better grasp on our Mr. Callen than the rest. They have traveled some of the same paths in regards to work and well, their childhood holds a few similarities as well." Hetty couldn't help but chuckle at the look on Gibbs face. "Yes, it's hard to believe that they would have much in common."

"Hetty, their personalities couldn't be more opposite." Gibbs replied.

Just as she set her cup back on its matching saucer and prepared to answers, their attention was drawn back toward the bullpen.

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"Where the HELL have you been!?" Sam roared as Callen entered, but before anyone could say anything else or Callen could reply Sam gave into his hurt and anger and threw a punch that connected with Callen's jaw.

Following Kensi's startled cry and Hetty's shout, "Mr. Hanna!" the room fell silent… waiting.

Sam pulled back as he saw the dark look that flashed across Callen's face as he waited for the retaliation that didn't come. The look dissolved as quickly as it appeared, replaced with one of uncertainty. Sam wasn't quite sure what to make of it or how to respond. When Callen just stood there and refused to speak, everyone became nervous.

"What's he doing?" Gibbs murmured.

"Nothing", came Hetty's simple reply.

"Thanks, Hetty, that much I can see. I meant, why?"

"Because, he was wrong. Mr. Callen never accepts excuses from his team and he won't offer one of his own. You don't agree? Isn't that very thing one of those infernal rules of yours?" Hetty asked with a smirk.

"Hmph." Gibbs grunted softly.

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"Callen, where did you go?" Deeks asked with a touch more control than Sam.

"Eliot needed to go home, so I took them to the airport and decided to drive around for a while."

"Drive around… for two days?" Sam wasn't buying it.

"Drove up the coast… had a few days built up so I took them. I let Hetty know, but I don't have to let you know where I am or what I'm doing on those days." Callen answered allowing the menacing look of earlier to once again cross his face.

Sam watched him closely before answering. "There was a time when you would have given us a heads up, so we wouldn't worry."

Callen smirked, "There was a time you would have pulled your punches… or withhold them in favor of a chat. Guess it's just not 'THAT' time anymore."

Sam frowned and narrowed his eyes as he watched Callen move to his desk and drop his bag.

Kensi cast a glance between the two, "Seriously, you two? You had me scared, Callen! I thought maybe you'd left again… weren't coming back… gone back to Blackguard."

Callen's head shot up at the mere mention of his previous employer, his smirk gone.

"Tell me that's not what you're doing… You're not stupid enough to go back there, are you?" Sam growled.

Callen turned a darkening scowl on his partner, "I don't know, Sam, you seem so set on knowing me better than I know myself. How about you tell me just how stupid you really think I am. What the hell are we doing here? What game are we playing at? I've been here how long now? I've done everything I said I'd do and yet you still doubt. Perhaps it's time to call this experiment for what it really is… a failure." Callen challenged.

"That what you want?" Sam returned.

Callen looked around the bullpen at each team member ending with Sam. 'Was that what he wanted?' he thought to himself. To say he was conflicted would have been an understatement. To admit that the answer was, 'no, he didn't want that' was not as easy as he felt it should be. There were more dangerous things at play and until he knew what exactly that was, or even where the team stood where he was concerned, he had no business involving them.

"I could ask you the same question. After all this time, you still have so little faith in me." Callen slammed his stuff down and headed for the armory…

"Smooth, Sam." Deeks stated, to which Sam shot him an angry glare then stalked off towards the gym.

"Smooth, Marty," Kensi smirked at her husband as he rolled his eyes.

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"Well, that didn't go well." Gibbs grunted.

"Did you honestly expect it would?" Hetty replied.

"No, but Hetty, we are running out of time here and I have to be honest, I don't think it's going to work."

"Oh, ye of little faith, Jethro." Hetty returned to her work as Gibbs followed the path of his friend.

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"So, how many times are you going to kill the guy?" Gibbs chuckled as he watched Callen load yet one more clip into his gun.

"Until I don't feel like beating the crap out of someone or packing up and walking." Callen answered honestly.

Gibbs brows raised in surprise, "okay…."

Callen laid the gun on the counter and rested his hands on either side. Letting out a long breath, he turned his head down to the side, "This isn't going to work, Gibbs".

"Did you really want it to?" Gibbs asked.

Callen shot him a look that made him continue, "Look, you've hardly put yourself out there."

"What are you talking about? I am here every day. I do my job." Callen argued.

"Yes, you do your job, always. But you know it takes more than that to build a team as successful as the one you lead five years ago. To have a team as successful as yours… you broke the cardinal rule. You became a family… you were invested in one another. That's not happening this time around. They are trying… you on the other hand…"

"They don't trust me… Sam doesn't." Callen turned to face his friend and mentor. He leaned back on the counter and crossed his arms against his chest. "I promised Michelle to keep them safe and I've done that. I am doing everything in my power to keep those kids safe… but I didn't save Michelle and at the end of the day, that's what matters. I can't change that. I wish I could."

"The only one still holding that against you, is you." Gibbs replied.

"I'm not so sure about that."

"Well, I am. Sam knows you did everything humanly possible to bring her home. Cut yourself some slack…"

"Things have changed, I've changed. We aren't the same people from five years ago."

"Yes, you've changed… and not for the better. You had walls before, but now? They are ridiculous. No one can break through those barriers." Gibbs pointed out. "You want them to trust you and yet you don't trust anyone… a bit hypocritical, don't you think?"

Callen's eyes darkened as he turned back to his gun. He picked up the headphones and placed them over his ears. "I'm simply trying to keep them safe. AS I said, things changed. I have more enemies now. Keeping them at arm's length is the only way I know to keep them safe. I'd cover my ears or leave, if I were you, Gibbs."

With that, Callen took aim and commenced unloading yet another clip into the already riddled target.


	25. Chapter 25

**DISCLAIMER** **: Same ole, same ole… they don't none of them belong to me… and it sucks.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hey there! Welcome back to another chapter! Well, we are really revving things up now, aren't we? Callen is one of those characters that you want so badly to protect and yet really want to give him a good ole "Gibbs slap" from time to time. HAHAHAHA. He has good reason for all of it… misguided perhaps, at times… but look at his life? Thank you so much for those who review… I do try to respond to everyone… I am sorry if I missed anyone. To the guest who commented in regards to the hypocrisy in Callen's actions… keep reading, you aren't the only one who thinks that… 12 Thank you to everyone who takes the time to read, I hope you are enjoying the story and that at some point you will feel comfortable enough to stop in and let me know what you think. I really do enjoy reading them all. I have another story in the works following this one… it will interconnect as they all do so, stay tuned… but I would love to hear your thoughts, as it may give me more ideas to work into this next story if not one to follow.**

 **Okay! Here you go!**

"Any luck?" Hetty asked, looking up.

"No. Were you seriously expecting that I would?" Gibbs grumbled the now familiar response.

"I had hoped… but sadly, no." Hetty replied as she sipped her tea.

"Something is going on… He thinks he's protecting them from something… someone. He wants this to work, of that I am certain." Gibbs stated confidently.

"Did he say that?" Hetty asked with a glint of hope in her eyes.

"Not in so many words, but… he just kept saying he needs to protect them. From who? What does he think is going on?" Gibbs asked.

"Hard to say. I have no doubt he's created many new enemies over his time with Blackguard. And, paranoia IS a side effect of that work." Hetty agreed.

"This isn't just a case of paranoia, Henrietta. Something is definitely going on. We best be finding out what before it's too late." Gibbs warned.

Hetty leaned back in her chair and let out a heavy sigh as she looked past Gibbs to the bullpen beyond, "Any ideas, Jethro? Because I am at a loss as to what else we can do to reach the boy."

"Leon is looking into a few things. Right now, it's a waiting game. I will say this… it is highly possible that he has pissed off some very dangerous people. For his sake, I hope I am wrong."

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When Callen finally found his way back to the bullpen, the others were busy working on their paperwork. Opening his computer, he attempted to ignore the tension that had invaded the space. His head throbbed. He could feel the doors closing on his ability to do nothing but disappoint these people.

A beep coming from his burn phone drew everyone's attention from their computers. Callen noticed it was from Eric. Included was a note that all other remnants had been erased. Curious, he went ahead and opened the message. Finally, another message from Joelle… The message itself was short but what it said hurt every bit as bad as the five bullets that ripped through his body so many years ago. This news had the potential to destroy.

"Callen! Are you okay?" Kensi asked after seeing the color drain from his face.

He heard the voice but the roaring in his ears camouflaged the words.

Deeks rose from his seat and moved towards Callen's desk. It was rare for Callen to allow anything that bothered him to show. It was a sign of weakness in his eyes and Callen couldn't allow himself the luxury of being vulnerable around anyone.

"Hey man, you okay?" Deeks asked.

Finally, Callen found the ability to acknowledge the voice. He closed the message and put the phone in his pocket as he looked at Deeks. He then looked around the bullpen unable to find the words needed to answer their concerns.

"Callen, you're scaring me. Are you okay?" Kensi asked again, reaching a hand out to touch him.

"No." was all he could manage as the need for escape began to build. He needed to breathe, to think… before he acted. He needed to be alone and reread the message. Without warning he jumped up from his seat, grabbed his bag and headed for the door.

"Mr. Callen? Where are you going?" Hetty called out.

Stopping in his tracks he backed up a few steps and slowly turned to face her. Hetty was taken back by the haunted look in his eyes.

"Do not stop me… you do NOT want me to stay here right now, trust me," he warned before turning and continuing his escape.

"Hetty?" Sam asked.

"Back to work. Those reports won't write themselves." She responded, returning to her desk.

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Finding a quiet spot on an otherwise crowded beach, Callen took his phone back out and once more opened the message.

There was no code to decipher, the message was painfully clear.

"Time is running short. They know and they're coming. I found the original list. Callen, it was Hetty. She created this list when you were five years old. I am so sorry. You are not safe. I'm not sure who you can trust. Please be careful. Joelle."

Hetty… Hetty created the Raven and Swan list after all! She lied so many times. She lied! The anger exploded within him and he was at a loss… who to trust, where to go. He had trusted Gibbs and even Leon but they were pushing hard for him to stay with Hetty's team. Did they know? Eliot was gone… Eric. He could still trust Eric.

Callen grabbed his phone and dialed…

"Hey Callen. Where are you? Everyone is freaking out. They may be getting suspicious of me helping you."

"Have you told them, showed them… anything, Eric?" Callen asked with an edge in his voice.

"No way. I promised you. I won't let you down. I'm just warning you." Eric replied strongly.

The swish of the door startled Eric, "Hey Eric, what are you doing?"

"Eric?" Callen asked.

"No! Commodore 64 is still the best computer ever, so… yeah. Gotta go, bye," he hurried off the phone and shoved it into his pocket before turning to Nell with a nervous smile, "Oh, hey, didn't hear you come in."

"uh-huh." Nell responded not believing it. "Who was that?" she asked pointing toward the phone in his pocket.

"Who, what? Oh, that! That waaaas…" he thought frantically… if he were ever to be an agent, he had to learn to lie better, "That… that was just a gaming buddy…"

"Gaming buddy… okay… so when did you get another phone? That's not your regular one." She asked curiously.

"What, I can't have a private life? I have to run everything by you?" Eric asked defensively.

"No, I was just curious… Is everything alright, Eric? You seem nervous lately." Nell asked with concern.

"Nervous… what have I to be nervous about?" Eric replied.

"I don't know…"

"Well, neither do I… so where have YOU been," Eric turned the tables, looking for information.

"Downstairs. Kensi is really upset and worried. Deeks went to calm down Sam." Nell explained.

"What about Hetty? What's she doing?"

"Eric, you saw Callen when he left. Everyone is upset and worried. Do you have any idea what the message was? I mean, you're the Great Eric Beale… surely you can find something, right?" Nell asked.

Eric looked away and swallowed thickly.

"Beale?" Nell pushed.

"No, I don't… and the last thing I'm doing is hacking his phone… even if I could. He threatened me if I did, Nell." Eric stated.

"Eric, Callen would never hurt you. He likes you."

"Yeah, I don't know about that," he lied, 'maybe he COULD do this' he thought smugly, "Besides, I can't… it's a burner."

"Right." Nell said as she dropped into her seat next to him.

"You would tell me if you knew something, right?"

"Like you'd tell me what's going on with Hetty?" Eric challenged.

"That's different…"

"How? How is it different?" annoyed by the double standard, he turned to look at her with his head tilted to the side slightly, as he waited for her answer.

"She's my boss." Nell answered softly.

"Exactly." Eric said and turned back to his computer.

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Callen tucked away the phone, shaking his head. Eric was a good kid. Brilliant, even. A genius at what he did and yet, so innocent. He had come a long way. There was a time when Eric would cave with just a look from Hetty or Nell. He was glad to see he had found his backbone.

He walked the boardwalk till the sun faded and the lights were lit before heading out to look for a place to stay. It was doubtful he'd sleep much. After all the years they had known each other… despite the complexities of the job… he had never believed Hetty would lie to him like that…


	26. Chapter 26

**DISCLAIMER** **: I own nothing in regards to the characters of NCIS LA/ NCIS/ Leverage**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Good Sunday Afternoon! Well, here we are. I have been reading through the reviews of yesterday's chapter and THANK YOU, by the way… I love the thought process of what you all think may be coming down the pike. I guess we will just have to wait and see! Hehehehehe. I'm not used to posting a story quite this quickly… so I'm astounded at how fast we are moving through. Still, we have quite a ways to go, so don't get discouraged with where the team is with Callen at this point in time. All is as it should be for now. Enough chit chat, let me know what you think of this next chapter. Your input is important. As a writer, you see a story from a certain view point. It isn't the only view point and so hearing what others are thinking makes the progression so much more interesting. I'm interested in hearing what you have to share. Enjoy! Thanks to all the new followers and favorites. I feel so blessed.**

Eric came into work exhausted the next day. He had wanted so badly to find even a small lead as to Joelle's location for Callen but had found nothing. He hated disappointing him. Joelle was brilliant at covering her tracks and it annoyed him. Nell had already been bugging him as to why he looked so sleep deprived and what he was into. He managed to convince her he'd stayed up late playing games. He wasn't sure she'd bought it, although he wasn't too concerned one way or the other.

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"Eric okay, Nell?" Deeks asked as he sat his things on his desk.

"Yeah, why?" Nell asked hesitantly.

"Well, we were supposed to go surfing this morning and he was a no show and when I tried calling, he let it go to message. It's not like him, that's all." Deeks explained, brushing the hair out of his eyes, taking in the concerned look of their resident analyst.

Nell's brows furrowed.

"Nell?" Kensi noticed as well.

"He looks like he hasn't slept at all. Says he stayed up all night gaming."

"Okay…," Deeks replied, "You don't believe him?"

"Not sure. Normally, the only times he's done that is when something's bothering him."

"Did you ask him?" Kensi urged.

Nell sighed as she looked at them both, "Yes, of course… but he got very defensive and refused to talk."

"Well, maybe he's just worried about Callen. It's a common theme here these days." Deeks assured her as he cast a look Kensi's direction, "he wouldn't be the only one to lose sleep."

"Did you see the look on his face? Something bad happened!" Kensi exclaimed.

"How's Sam?" Nell asked quietly.

"Beating the crap out of another punching bag… he's worried." Kensi replied.

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"Sam," Hetty called out as he pummeled the punching bag.

"Not now." Sam grunted.

"Yes, NOW, Mr. Hanna" came the reply.

"What? What do you want, Hetty?" Sam paused to wipe the sweat from his face.

"I need to know you are okay, Sam," Hetty stated.

"Well, I'm not. Something is going on with my partner and once again he's pushing me away." Sam replied miserably, "He's my partner, Hetty. I should have his back. I have a bad feeling about this… whatever THIS is… it's not good."

"Agreed." Hetty sighed.

Sam looked at the small woman in front of him, really taking in the look of fatigue and worry, "I'm sorry, Hetty… You okay?"

"I am worried, Sam. Very worried."

"You haven't heard from him yet today?" Sam asked noticing the time.

"Not yet and I don't expect to." Hetty replied, "However, we have work to do, Mr. Hanna. Please shower and join your teammates." Once more, all business, she turned toward the doors and exited into the courtyard.

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Callen sat in the coffee shop staring into his cup as if expecting to find the answers he so desperately longed for. Had it been any other time of the day, he may have traded the coffee shop for a bar stool and something a whole lot stronger… but he learned the hard way never to allow himself to lose control of his thoughts and emotions, let alone lose control of his actions.

He knew he needed to go back… he couldn't give his hand away. He needed Eric's help and he needed more answers than Joelle's message offered. They needed to talk. He needed to keep her safe. He'd kept an eye on her son since he'd helped her fake her death several years prior. He'd made her a promise to keep him safe and he would keep that promise. He owed her.

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Eric appreciated the time he got to himself these days. It was getting harder and harder to keep it all from Nell.

He had facial rec. running in an effort to find Joelle and in order to do that unseen, he had to run it behind layers of programs to keep it hidden from prying eyes. Alerts were for him only. He had worked tirelessly all night when he finally gave in to a few hours of sleep. Now he fought the lack of rest as he attempted tackling their present case load. He was worried about Callen. He hadn't shown up for work and while he'd never admit it to Callen… he'd read the message Joelle had sent. He knew how shocked and hurt he had to be. Even he found it hard to be near her right now, knowing what the list became. Spinning his chair in circles in an effort to control his excess energy he stopped short when he heard the alarm he never expected to hear. He'd been looking for weeks with no luck. He spun to face his computer quickly working to find the long-awaited information. Callen would be so happy.

"NO, NO, NO!" Eric yelled out dismayed at the unexpected findings. Quickly he downloaded the information before eradicating it from all sources present. Grabbing the USB from the thumb drive, he pushed off and rolled toward the door, spinning around as he reached the opposite side of the room. He leaped from his chair, sending it spinning in the process and nearly collided in the doorway with none other than Hetty Lange.

"Whoa, Mr. Beale. What is the emergency that I should be bowled over!"

"Uh, right, sorry Hetty… Gotta go." Eric announced simply.

"Got. to. go?" Hetty repeated, her eyebrows raised in question, "Exactly WHERE do you need to go in such a rush, Mr. Beale?"

"What?" Eric squeaked nervously, "Oh, well, you see… I've gotta go uhmmm… pee. Yeah, I drank too much coffee and so now I … well, you know…" he fidgeted dramatically from foot to foot for effect.

"You have to pee… yes… yes, I think I get it… By all means… Go!" Hetty flourished her hand toward the door and Eric seized the opportunity to escape further questioning by the diminutive leader. As he cleared the door, he only just avoided crashing into Nell.

Nell turned to watch his hasty retreat before turning a quizzical gaze on Hetty, "Dare I ask?"

"I wouldn't," Hetty shook her head, "he seems a bit squirrelier than usual, even for him."

Nell raised a brow and attempted to hide the grin that begged at the choice of words, "Yes, he has seemed rather nervous all day." she agreed.

"Do we know why?" Hetty inquired.

Nell shook her head as she answered. "No and not for lack of trying. The others think it's all that's happened with Callen."

"Mhm, perhaps… I know he has always looked up to Mr. Callen but this just seems more extreme…" Hetty thought for a moment before continuing, "Miss Jones, would you please take a few moments while Mr. Beale is preoccupied and look into his activities as late?"

"What? Hetty…" Nell began.

"Problem, Miss Jones?" Hetty questioned.

"No, I mean… no… what exactly am I looking for?" she asked hesitantly.

"I want to know any searches he has been doing that go beyond current missions… any programs he's run, and why… report only to me." Hetty explained.

"Hetty, what are you implying?" Nell asked.

"I'm implying nothing…. merely curious. Eyes open and alert, Miss Jones." Hetty answered as she walked through the door.


	27. Chapter 27

**DISCLAIMER** **: No, I do not own any member of the NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage teams and shows.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: So apparently, yesterday's chapter did not appease. LOL. Sorry, that was kind of mean, looking back... Still, my favorite part of that chapter was Eric and Hetty, but whatever. LOL! Okay, let's try another chapter. Hope you enjoy this one a little bit more. HA. Thanks to everyone reading! Thank you to all those who favorited and followed. Most especially, thanks goes out to everyone who takes the time to read and review. I am so thankful to have the opportunity to chat with you about your thoughts on how it is progressing. I look forward to hearing from you once again, after you read this chapter and I pray that more of you will feel inclined to join in on that discussion!**

Callen had just climbed into his car when his phone began the rhythmic hum of an incoming call. The option of callers was slim. Recognizing the number, he answered.

"Eric?"

"Callen. I'm glad I got you… I don't know what I'd do if I didn't. I mean, we really need a fall back, right?" Eric rattled on.

"Eric?" Callen repeated, rolling his eyes.

"People are worried about you!" Eric continued to ramble, "I know I am… I mean, I know you can handle yourself but seriously, they don't know everything we… I, I mean you know… I only know because I gave you the message and who it's from. Not that I know what it said because that's none of my business."

"Is that why you called? To tell me somebody is worried…" Callen asked, his voice tight with frustration.

"What? Oh, no… I wish…" things grew quiet on the other end.

"What's going on, Eric… has something happened there? Did you find Joelle?" Callen asked.

"No… everything here is fine… except that they are upset because you aren't here. And yes, yeah, I found her," he answered quietly as he glanced around, making sure he was still alone.

"Great work… I knew you would eventually. She's good, but you're better. So how did you do it?" Callen asked with relief.

"I ran her picture through facial rec. I have forever but nothing. Then this morning…"

"She was bound to slip eventually," Callen confirmed.

"Callen" Eric all but whispered.

He heard the desperation in the young man's voice, "Where is she, Eric? What's going on?"

"She didn't slip up, Callen…" Eric spoke softly.

"Where. Is. She!" his voice raised and when he didn't answer right away, his nerves got the better of him, "ERIC!" he yelled, giving into the panic welling up in his chest, "WHERE is she?!"

"She's dead, Callen… She's dead. Murdered. I've sent the report to your phone. They must have found her right after she sent that message."

Callen said nothing as he began pulling up the information.

"The murderer left a message of his own… I'm assuming it was meant for you…"

Eric added.

Again, there came no response as Callen stared in shock at the gruesome picture on the screen. 'Ghost' was carved into her forehead.

"Callen? I'm sorry. I tried to find her… I swear."

"Not your fault… but Eric, make these photos disappear before her family has a chance to see them… Please." Callen pleaded quietly.

"Sure, consider it done." Eric spoke before realizing the other end of the line was empty.

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The team had just returned from their latest lead on a case and were in the bullpen with Nell and Eric going over their findings when Callen charged in from the front hall, headed straight for Hetty's desk. He hadn't acknowledged his name being called out by his teammates. Eric's eyes grew alarmingly large as he watched what he knew would be a disastrous meeting and there was nothing he could say or do that wouldn't give away what all he knew.

"Mr. Callen," Hetty greeted, "it's about time. I do not recall your requesting time off." She attempted to keep things calm though her heart rate was uncharacteristically fast.

"I'm not here to play your games, Hetty," Callen spoke lowly.

"I assure you, I am not in the business of playing games." Hetty stated.

"Oh really? Because as far as I can tell, that's all you do... play games with people's lives."

While by all accounts, the business of the day continued, the hum of conversation had died down to a mere whispering. Heads occasionally turned to glance at the pair in question. Though rare, arguments between the two were known to be verbally intense and emotionally volatile in nature. What happened between these two legends affected everyone else present… especially the five individuals gathered at the entrance to the bullpen. Sam moved toward the two when a hand reached out to stop him.

"Not your fight, Sam. This is between Callen and Hetty. That would be like stepping between two pit bulls. Bad way to die, man", Deeks stated.

"Perhaps, Mr. Callen, you could sit down and we could discuss whatever is bothering you." Hetty motioned to the chair in front of her desk. The very chair he used to sit in at the end of a long day and share a tumbler of one drink or another from her private collection.

"Like the time we discussed your connections with Grace, Lauren, Mike, Sullivan? That time?"

"Mr. Callen, I thought we had put that to rest… Please, sit down." Hetty urged.

"Not this time…" Callen scowled, "This time, I am in control."

"Are you certain? You seem anything BUT in control, I must say." Hetty's full attention was on her boy. The day she had feared for so long had finally come and she could distract all she wanted but there was no stopping the storm that was about to come crashing down. She only hoped he would allow her to explain. As of the moment it was looking highly unlikely. Her world was about to come to a heart crushing halt.

"You lied to me that day, Henrietta. You LIED to me! You told me you never created a Raven and Swan scenario".

"…and I didn't…" Hetty exclaimed.

"LIES, HETTY!"

"Mr. Callen, Please!" she pleaded.

"No! You lied… and I have the list to prove it? A list you created the year Amy and I came to America. A list that contains all the names I just mentioned plus numerous others. Eliot wasn't such a stranger to you, was he? After all, you put his name on the list, as well, didn't you?"

"Let me explain… please." she attempted once more.

"You mean lie, don't you?" Callen seethed, "Fabricate a new truth? Twist the narrative to fit whatever agenda you have at the moment! What I want to know is, at what point, under what criteria did you decide who lived and who died?"

"It's not like that… that was never my intention…" Hetty exclaimed.

"Well, I doubt there are many who would believe that, considering Eliot and I are all that remain of your precious little experiment… Why Hetty? Why!? I TRUSTED you!" Callen yelled before dropping to an almost whisper, "I trusted you. Was it worth it?"

"I did it to protect them just as I said… to protect YOU." Hetty tried to explain calmly but Callen wasn't hearing it. His anger was boiling over more than she had ever seen before.

"Protect… my sister DIED under your protection… they ALL DIED! You failed all of them, Hetty! YOU. FAILED. ME!" he hissed.

Sadness filled her eyes as she stared back into the pain filled ones of the man in front of her, "Yes, on THAT much we can agree on… but there's more to this than meets the eye."

"There always is… so tell me, how did you find her? I've not been able to … how did you know about the messages?"

"You've lost me, of whom are we speaking?" Hetty was taken completely by surprise, now.

"You know damn well who I'm speaking of! Joelle Taylor!" Callen all but yelled, taking everyone by surprise.

"Mr. Callen?" Hetty asked, her eyes large behind her glasses.

"Did you have to kill her?" Callen charged.

"I had no part in her death. You, yourself, was there." Hetty answered more than confused.

"Don't Henrietta… who did you get to do your dirty work this time, seeing as I was unavailable!" he demanded, slamming his phone down with the gruesome picture of Joelle's marked body. "Who!? Who killed her? Wasn't it punishment enough that she had to leave her son behind?"

Hetty stared at the photo in shock and disgust… reaching to pick the phone up Callen grabbed it first.

"I swear, Mr. Callen, I had no part in this… this atrocity. I, along with everyone here, believed she died years ago. Everyone, that is, but you apparently… but I did not do this, Mr. Callen. You MUST know that!" Hetty shook her head in distress.

"I don't know any such thing. My life hasn't been mine… ever, has it? I trusted you… more than anyone. I let you in… I believed in you… and you lied to me over and over! I don't believe you… I can't, not anymore. Mark my words, I WILL get to the bottom of whatever it is you are trying to pull… I will SHUT you down… you and everyone you have working for you." His voice echoed across the now silent building… followed by the pain that radiated from both individuals… pain felt by every person there who knew and understood the relationship that now dissolved in front of them.


	28. Chapter 28

**DISCLAIMER** **: I do not own any of the characters of NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. Bummer.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Sorry, I meant to post this sooner, but the Chiropractor takes precedence. HA Now that I'm all relaxed and curled up in my chair… I am ready for an afternoon of re-watching all the NCIS LA's and Leverage's for research and working on my next story! For now, however, you can be reading the NEXT chapter in PHOENIX RIIIIIIISSSSSSIIIIING! Sorry, had to do that… only because I'm not hurting for the moment and am in a good mood. LOL! For everyone who hit the favorite and follow buttons… I thank you. For every single person who has taken the time to read my stories… I am forever grateful… and for all of you who take the extra moment to drop in and say hello… it means a lot to me to hear what you think of what you are reading… where do you think it's going, and hearing that you actually hear their voices as you read is such an awesome compliment… Thank you… I hope more of you feel free to do the same. Have a great day!**

"Callen, enough!"

Turning to face the commanding voice of Leroy Jethro Gibbs, the anger coursed through him like the blood that pumped through his veins, blinding him to anything but the hurt and anger that was now consuming him. Callen seldom, if ever, gave into his emotions without putting thought into the repercussions of doing so… but Hetty had been his anchor for many years and to find out that she had lied to this degree came as a crushing blow.

"Back down… NOW!" Gibbs ordered, alarmed by the look in Callen's eyes.

Callen turned to glare at Hetty once more.

"This isn't done… not even close." Charging down the steps with no intention of addressing another soul, Gibbs stepped directly in front of him, a hand on his chest.

Callen stopped, looking at the hand spread wide on the center of his chest. Slowly his eyes follow their way up to lock with those of someone he had called his friend for so many years. Someone whom he had trusted as much as Hetty. Knowing, now, how misguided he had been in giving her so much access to his life left him questioning every other person he ever considered a friend.

Gibbs was completely taken back by the man in front of him. While he looked like the kid he'd mentored and worked with for years, the eyes were dark and hard, filled with hate and distrust. "G."

Callen's eyes narrowed, locked square on with Gibbs.

"G… What's going on?" Gibbs asked, trying to connect with him.

"Sure, you don't already know?" he asked.

"What?" Gibbs asked with a furrowed brow.

Callen grabbed the wrist of the hand holding him back. With a strength that belied his size, he removed the hand and pushed back. His voice low and menacing as he replied, "You had better hope I don't find that you had any knowledge of this. You tell Leon, I'm done being everyone's puppet.

"Callen, I have no clue what you are talking about… let's go grab a beer and we'll sort this out." Gibbs offered.

"No… I'm done. I don't trust her and I don't know yet if I can trust you… I hope to God you aren't a part of this… but if you are… I will not stop until I bring you all down!" Callen seethed.

Callen stepped around him and walked toward the door.

"G! Wait." Sam called.

"Let him go." Hetty ordered.

Once he was gone, Gibbs spun back to face Hetty, who stood rooted in shock.

"What the HELL is going on?" Gibbs roared, "Hetty!"

Hetty just shook her head in confusion, "I don't know, Jethro."

Slowly the team moved over to Hetty's desk.

"What's this list he mentioned?" Gibbs asked.

Hetty sat back down in her chair. Her face grim, she took a deep breath and slowly released it as she began to explain…

"In 1975 after things went badly with Clara, I was tasked with creating a list of the children within the agency. No one had known anything about Amy and Callen until Clara had called asking for assistance. The powers that be were not happy with the surprise. Of course, there were a lot of agents who chose to keep their families a secret in order to protect them from their enemies. It was decided that more needed to be done for the children of the agents. Should something happen to the agents, we wanted to make sure no more children fell through the cracks, as was the case with Callen and Amy. Callen found out about the list," she explained.

"Why is that a problem?" Sam asked, "sounds like a good thing."

"In and of itself… it's not. However, several years down the line, after I had turned the list over to my superiors, I began to suspect there was more going on with the list than I was originally told."

"Such as?" Gibbs pushed, not liking where the conversation was leading.

"First of all, Amy died." Hetty stated regretfully.

"Because of Comescu," Deeks said.

"Perhaps, but then other things began happening… I had no proof but I began to fear that there was more at play than the purpose for which they requested the list. It was especially evident with Mr. Callen. He was out of my reach, by then… So, I did everything in my power to protect all that I could."

"You aren't answering the question. What was going on that these kids needed protecting?" Gibbs reiterated.

"I began noticing that for kids, like Callen and Amy, who appeared to have a natural innate ability for this line of work, their parents began dying mysteriously… car accidents, missions gone wrong, what was assumed to be enemy attacks… With them gone, the children were put under the care and control of the government. Specifically of agents within the agency." Hetty explained.

"Ravens and Swans", Sam mumbled.

"Yes. As I said, I had little control back then… I did what I could to prevent these children being trained and exploited." she confirmed, a note of sadness in her voice.

"Why didn't they put Callen in an agent's home? Had to be better than what he was living with." Kensi asked.

"At one point, as I explained before, they had… the Rostoff's. Callen had the added misfortune of being hunted by the Comescus. It became a case of 'Nature vs. Nurture', I'm afraid. Callen was considered a prodigy. Two parents who were considered the best of the best and a grandfather who was a legend. It was assumed that Amy and Callen would follow suit. Callen especially showed talent. Having lived through the murder of his mother, protected by his sister, and dealing with the shock of it all… Callen was a shy boy when he first arrived. It is my belief that they were separated for this very reason. Callen relied heavily on his sister. Once separated my guess is that he was placed into foster care to toughen him up. It wasn't long before there were definite signs that he had what it would take to become the legend he is today."

"That's awful, Hetty! Didn't you fight for him?" Kensi exclaimed in shock.

"Yes, I did. However, he was unreachable. At that point in my career, I had yet to make all the contacts I have today… certainly, I did not possess the ability to garner favors needed. Garrison had put Michael Reinhardt in charge of following Callen's every move and to keep careful track of where he was and who he was with. The rest of us were unable to get close to Callen personally. We watched from afar. There were things we were able to do to manipulate the foster system into moving him without giving ourselves away but that was all. Arkady had people who followed for safety reasons but Callen would never know of any of this… and he wouldn't believe it now, I'm certain." Hetty finished with a sad sigh.

"I still don't understand why Callen was so angry." Deeks stated. "I mean, I get it, you've been keeping a whole lot of secrets regarding his past that quite frankly aren't yours to keep. He has a right to know these things. But what I just saw goes way beyond that. I have NEVER seen Callen that angry and I have seen him pretty dang mad before… and what was that about Eliot? He said you knew who he was… that this wasn't your first introduction? What was THAT about?"

"Because he knows something more than we do and believes the perpetrator is me as the list's creator." Hetty answered, "As for Mr. Spencer, yes, I was aware of Mr. Spencer back when the list was created. I am not certain if his parents ever really spoke to him about this and as such, what I say here stays here. Eliot's mother was a CIA agent… a good one. From what I understood, his father had been told what she did for a living. It caused problems in their marriage. When she died, the family thought it to be a mere car accident. That was not the case. That was not the case at all. The day she died, she and her husband had a fight and so he was not in the car, as was the plan, I'm sure. The steering wheel had been laced with a fast-acting drug… that was the real cause of the crash. No doubt, he saw many of his wife's characteristics in their son and wanted to squash it to prevent him from following in her footsteps… however, it only pushed him farther away. Eventually, the government got their hands on the boy anyway. He and Mr. Callen met shortly after Mr. Spencer joined the military, if I'm not mistaken.

"That's all well and good, Hetty. There has to be more to it than that. The look on his face was nothing I had ever seen on him before. Callen is always in control. He threatened me as being a part of something far more sinister than a list," Gibbs argued.

"Oh, much more is at play and I am as confused as the lot of you as to who is pulling the strings… but whoever it is has done a good job of convincing him we are the enemy… Were any of you aware that Joelle Taylor was, in fact, still alive?" Hetty looked around the group in question.

"What?" Kensi cried out in shock. "She died seven years ago!"

"You telling us that's not the case?" Sam asked.

"Apparently, until yesterday, when she was brutally murdered in an effort to send Callen a message." Hetty explained.

"Message?" Nell asked.

"Yes, the murderer made it a point to torture the poor woman before taking her life. He carved the word 'Ghost' into her forehead. Why? I have no idea as yet." Hetty informed them, even now the chill in her spine remained.

"So, Callen knew she was alive? Why wouldn't he tell us?" Kensi asked.

"My guess… he was protecting her from someone or something."

"Shouldn't we go find him and drag him back here and explain the facts as we know them?" Deeks offered.

"You won't find him now. He's in the wind. God only knows where this will lead." Gibbs sighed heavily.

"Truth will out in the end, Jethro." Hetty stated.

"You keep saying that, Hetty. I'm not so sure this time." Gibbs answered skeptically.

"Eventually, he will find what he needs and he will know I was not the enemy."

"You sure about that, Hetty? Seems to me, if what you say is true… and Joelle died in the process of uncovering it… Someone is going to a lot of trouble to cover their tracks." Gibbs suggested.

"But why? What do they want? What do they gain by turning Callen against you?" Kensi asked.

The group fell silent, in thought.

"Think about it. The guy trusts no one. His only real friendships were here. Alienate Hetty, you alienate the team by association. Whoever THIS IS… is after Callen." Sam surmised. "Whoever this is… has been playing the long game."

"If you want to know what I think… I think it's been going on since Blackguard got involved." Deeks suggested, "When THIS all blew up and Callen left for them… you can't get any more alienated than that."

"Agreed," Sam stated wearily, "and we fell for it."


	29. Chapter 29

**DISCLAIMER** **: I do not own any of the characters from NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. It bums me out, too.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi everyone! Welcome back! I am so thankful and blessed to have such awesome readers. I am absolutely LOVING all the reviews and messages! Some are close with what is coming and some are giving me great ideas of future stories. Callen is going to be BUSY. Thank you to all the new Favorites... all the new Followers... and thank you, thank you, thank you, for all the reviews. Please to each and ever reader... stop by and say hi, tell me what you think... I love hearing from you. Well, let's have at another chapter!**

Hetty looked around the somber group. She worried whether this was something they could ever overcome. She knew in her heart that this team she created was the best there ever was in the business. Of that, she had no doubt… She also knew that they would do whatever was required to find a resolution in saving G Callen… whether he wanted saving or not. No, the question lay in whether or not the team would remain as such, in the end… or would they be scattered to the four winds… Banishing the oppressive thoughts from her mind, she again addressed the group before her.

"Jethro… were you aware that this was not Mr. Callen's first foray with Blackguard… more importantly, the Renegades?" Hetty asked.

Gibbs looked at the expectant faces around him… "Callen worked within the CIA early on. That's no surprise to anyone."

"Yes, Jethro… but that is not what I asked. The original Blackguard. Did he work for them?" Hetty pressed.

Uncomfortably, Gibbs took in a deep breath and released it slowly as his mind went back in time to when he and Callen first met. "I don't know, Hetty." He shrugged, "It's possible. The CIA was very interested in him. Once they caught wind of his talents, they had him involved in cases way above any of our paygrades. I suspected it was far more serious than regular run of the mill cases when he finished his time with them. He would never discuss it with me. All I know, is whatever he worked on last with them was nearly his undoing. I spent months looking for him. You know how he is, Hetty. It wasn't good."

"Well, his friend, Mr. Spencer, more than implied that they both spent time with the original Blackguard." Hetty added.

Sam shared a look with the rest of the team… it explained so much where Callen was concerned.

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Callen drove… just to drive… just to think. Life was spiraling. He couldn't remember the last time it hadn't been. He wanted so badly to trust the team again. Trust Hetty. Now he had doubts about everyone and everything. Either they were against him or in danger because of him.

Pulling to the side of the road, he slammed it into park and climbed out. The sky was dark now and the road was basically deserted. He needed air. The confines of the car, mixed with his darkening thoughts, was suffocating him. He walked back and forth in front of the car before stopping by the driver's side. He looked out into the dark… A blank canvas for his nightmares to play out on. Frustration took over and he brought his fists down against the roof then rested his forehead against the top of his hands. He was at a loss. He was used to doing things alone. He was okay, even with having to defend himself against the world. Still, it was hard now, knowing that at one time, he would have had an entire team at his back… the very team he was now filled with doubts over. He knew, regardless of whether he trusted them or not, he couldn't have allowed them to follow him down this road. He had no clue what was coming… or why. He had no idea of what it was even about at this point. Was it someone with a vendetta? Were the Comescus not as dead as he had thought? Did this have anything and everything to do with the message Owen Granger had left him?

Breathing slowly in an effort to calm his nerves and clear his mind he looked around at the quiet night and slowly climbed inside and turned the car back towards LA.

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It had taken a few days to convince Nate and Sofie that the dangers were real and they needed to come to LA. Thanks to Sofie, they were able to upgrade their living accommodations. The only one who found the change problematic was Eliot. Like Callen, Eliot's belief was that 'lay low' meant LAY LOW… blend in. Sofie thought that in LA, you would blend in better in a posh high-end suite. Eliot just rolled his eyes and mumbled to himself about how they didn't truly understand the concept of blending in.

"So, how did we end up in the middle of your friend's troubles, Eliot?" Nate asked.

"Because, it isn't just HIS trouble, Nate." Eliot scowled.

"What, exactly, is THAT supposed to mean?" he questioned with concern. Eliot had an entire life they knew nothing about. Every now and again, characters would crawl out of the woodwork to taunt him, threaten him and in doing so up-end the entire teams world until finally the past was put back where it belonged… in the past.

"Long story short… I came to help Callen but as it turns out, I'm as much a part of things as he is." Eliot offered in way of a generic explanation.

"There's a list", Parker stated as if that explained everything.

"A list?" Sofie asked curiously.

Eliot sighed as he rolled his eyes, "Yes, Hardison and Eric came across this list during a search. Turns out, they had me listed as deceased." At the questioning glances he explained.

"Years back, when I worked for the CIA… there was a mission that didn't go as planned. The end result was that I was considered MIA and presumed dead. Callen came looking and found me. He allowed them to continue thinking I had died so I could walk away."

"Wait, YOU worked for the CIA?" Sofie asked, her tone one of shock.

"So, what's the list for?" Nate asked, knowing Eliot would waste no more time on questions about his past jobs.

"We aren't entirely sure… Though, Callen believes it was a Ravens and Swans initiative." Eliot answered.

"Who authored the list?" Sofie asked, "and what, exactly, IS a 'Ravens and Swans' initiative?"

"Around the time of Hitler, the Soviets thought it a smart idea to take children in and raise them to be spies. Raised from childhood to be sleeper spies, with the permission of their parents." Hardison shook his head at the thoughts of such an enterprise.

"And the list?" Sofie asked alarmed as well.

"This list was created in 1975. The year Callen's mother was murdered and his father disappeared. The same year

Callen and his sister were brought to America. It almost appears as though they were the catalyst for the list's making. That's what we believe anyway." Eliot surmised.

"Wait, Callen has a sister?" Nate asked, confused, "and you say they were BROUGHT to America… from WHERE exactly did they come from?"

"Had. She was murdered by this Romanian crime family who apparently had a family blood feud going on with the Callen's." Eliot corrected. He hated sharing Callen's business but it was unavoidable at this point in the game and these were people he trusted to keep it where it belonged… unspoken, "Callen was born in Romania, a fact he only remembered several years ago."

"Family Blood what? I thought that only happened in the movies." Sofie stated in surprise.

"Blood Feud… Callen comes with a family history of agents… from both sides. His grandfather on his mother's side was an OSS Agent and CIA Agent, it's a long story but in the end, he killed five of the Comescu family members for being war criminals after WWII. His mother was a CIA Agent and Hetty Lange was her handler. His father was a major in the KGB."

"Wow," Nate mouthed, though nothing was heard.

"Yeah," Eliot growled.

"Okay, but you didn't say… who authored this list… and WHY were YOU on it?" Nate asked.

"When Callen told us we needed to leave, he made it clear that it was most likely Hetty Lange. As for why I am on it… I don't know."

"Hetty Lange? His boss? You say she was his mother's handler…" Sofie asked in surprise.

"Basically. She had been one of the few people in Callen's life that he truly trusted. It's not a good situation." Eliot began pacing.

"Where, exactly, is Callen now?" Nate asked.

"No clue. He dropped us at the airport and took off. I've not heard from him."

"He dropped you at the airport? Why?" Sofie asked becoming even more confused by the turn of events. It was obvious that Eliot was closer to this Callen than any of them realized. They had a shared past that Eliot had seen fit to keep from them… like so much of the rest of his past life.

Eliot sighed in frustration, "Yes, the airport. They know I'm alive now… whoever 'they' are. Callen was concerned for your safety, so he wanted me to take these two and go before something more happened."

Sofie cast a look at Nate. She knew his concerns regarding Eliot's friend and the possible dangers any connection with him could impose on their family. He also respected Eliot. They knew he'd had many trials to overcome in his life… beginning with the untimely death of his mother and the embattled relationship with his father… not to mention his military career. There was still so very much they didn't know. One of the obvious revelations of late was this connection between Eliot and Callen. How and when did they meet? What did either of them have to do with the list in question? Regardless of the connection in the past… the men shared a brotherhood of sorts.

"Eliot…" Nate started before Eliot stopped him mid-sentence.

"Don't start… I only asked you here to make the task of keeping you safe easier while I help Callen get to the bottom of this…" Eliot warned.

"I was simply going to ask if there is anything we could do to help?" Nate finished.

Eliot stopped pacing and turned to face his team. The sincerity shown on all their faces. Unsure of how to respond, he ran a hand through his hair, "I'm going out. I will grab coffee… tea… dinner. Stay put." He ordered as he closed the door behind him.


	30. Chapter 30

**DISCLAIMER** **: Nothing has changed, I still don't own a single character from any of the three shows represented here... NCIS LA, NCIS, AND Leverage. It's unfortunate, but there you have it.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTES** **: Hi y'all. So a bit of clarification before we start a new chapter here. The NATE we are speaking of in this story is not the Nate from NCIS. The Nate we see here is Nate Ford from Team Leverage. I for one reason or another, chose to leave the NCIS LA team's Nate out of the mix this time. One obvious reason is the confusion it would have caused. So yeah, there's that. Hope that helps. I hope you enjoy the latest installment. After you read it... PLEASE take just a few moments to click on the box below and leave me a review. Your reviews are important to me and I truly enjoy reading them. Thanks to everyone who has done just that so far. Thanks to all the favorites and follows... those are equally important. I always get excited when I come to check on things and find I have reviews to read or someone has found enough favor in it to cause them to favorite it or follow it. So I thank you! Read and Review...**

Finding a place where he could lay low and think things through was difficult. He needed to go completely dark. Gibbs kept calling, Ziva kept calling, Sam and Deeks had both taken to calling his work phone. Right now, he was simply not able to deal with any more input from anyone. When they had asked him to come back to NCIS, he had been skeptical as to whether he could step back into the role they were asking him to fill. So much had happened in the time he was gone. People change and he had changed a lot… or maybe not. Maybe he merely became who he had always been after a near decade of pretending for the sake of these people he had allowed himself, foolishly, to become attached to. There was no doubt, however, that they had changed. Sam's whole world had changed before Callen had called it quits with the team… there was no denying that he had changed right along with it… and who could blame him. Kensi and Deeks married… he shook his head. He still couldn't believe it. They seemed like and unlikely couple. Kensi, who couldn't seem to make it past the first date… So sure of herself when it came to work but relationships? Then along came their LAPD detective. Another of Hetty's curious choices… he was such a goof when he first came. But Callen watched as he evolved into the agent he was today, regardless of whether he claimed that title or not. He was a good agent. He was incredible with undercover work. He knew how to lighten the mood when the team needed it. He made Kensi laugh. He made her happy. That alone garnered him favor where Callen was concerned… even if the man had a talent for grating on Callen's nerves at the same time. The one thing he couldn't deny was that Deeks, for all his craziness… was a good friend. During their last mission before everything fell apart, he and Deeks had really gotten the chance to spend time together… they worked well together. He could have seen them doing that more often on cases. If he were honest, he liked being around the guy, he made him laugh. That wasn't always an easy task. Still, as much as he liked the guy and respected him… he was still a part of the team that had been hand chosen by the one person who had betrayed him and was really no different than all the many foster homes he had been subjected to. He just couldn't believe she could do that to him. Why? He shook his head as he pinched his nose before running his fingers across his weary eyes and allowing his hand to slide down his face as if trying to erase the darkening thoughts filling his head.

Then there were the kids… they had grown up while he was gone. Yes, he watched over them but he wasn't there for all the milestones. Four years was a long time where they were concerned… and he couldn't help feeling he missed out on a lot and he had certainly let them down. He'd kept his promise to Michelle… and he would continue to do that as long as it was needed. It was then he chose to travel the distance to San Francisco. He would be able to keep an eye on the kids and be where his team wouldn't be looking.

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Eric was busy working on yet another case and when he found the rare few moments alone, he was continuing his look into the list and trying to find Callen. He had little to no success with either. Just as he found himself at the mercy of total frustration, he received a cryptic but urgent message from Hardison. Unable to break away from Nell and the rest of the team, he had to wait until he got home to finally contact the man.

"Hey, Hardison?" he greeted when he answered the phone call.

"Eric?" he exclaimed, "where the heck have you been? I've been trying for hours to get a hold of you, man."

"Sorry, the team is beginning to suspect I know more than I'm letting on. I rarely get a moment alone these days. What's up on your end? You make it back okay?" Eric rattled on.

"Well, for one… we never left LA. Nate and Sofie came here. Secondly, Eliot is missing." Hardison stated.

"Wait, you never left? He took you to the Airport! Where have you been all this time? And what do you MEAN Eliot is missing?" Eric bubbled over.

"We came back to Venice Beach and found a place to stay and then had Nate and Sofie meet us here. Yesterday, Eliot went for food and never came back. He's not answering his phone, it goes straight to voicemail. Something's wrong Eric. Eliot has been known to go off on his own but he's never not answered a call from us for this long. What about you, man? What's happening there? I couldn't reach Callen either. Same thing happens, it goes straight to voicemail. Do you think they are together? Maybe someone took them both out!" Hardison started getting more worked up the longer he thought.

"First of all, I doubt they are both in trouble. Secondly, Callen frequently shuts his phone down in an effort to KEEP us from finding him. It's been nuts here since you left… or didn't leave… Anyway, Callen has gone dark. Stuff blew up here and he left. Everybody is freaking out. I have to be very careful with what I am doing. Where exactly are you? I'll head over." Eric offered. Taking down the address of their present location, "Wow, Callen would have suggested you lie low and blend in."

"Yeah, Eliot tried," Hardison mumbled.

"Gotcha… I have to take care of a few things but I'll be there soon." Eric promised.

An hour later and Eric was finally knocking on the door of Hardison and his team.

"Whoa! Eric! Good to see you, man. What's all this?" Hardison asked as he opened the door wide.

"For one, I'm hungry. I thought you might be too. Didn't know what you liked so I got a little of everything. This? This is to help us get down to business and try to find Callen and Eliot." Eric grinned.

"Well, good luck. We haven't had any yet. Eliot can disappear better than anyone I know," Parker offered.

"Great… like one isn't bad enough," Eric muttered as he set the computers up.

"So, you are?" Nate asked, watching Eric set to work.

"Nate, this is Eric Beale." He works with Callen.

"Ah, the genius who mastered the Steranko Security System. Impressive."

"Thank you?" Eric glanced over at Nate curiously.

Nate chuckled as he added, "Any chance you could share that bit of information with Hardison… for future reference?"

"Uh…" Eric looked from Nate to Hardison, debating the answer, "Sure… I guess."

"Good man. Now, can you find Eliot?" Nate replied.

"I have facial rec running and Kaleidoscope is searching but if he's anything like Callen, it won't be easy. Callen went missing for several YEARS and we never found him until he wanted to be found… and THEN he was blatant about it." Eric stated, shaking his head without looking up from his work.

"Do you have any idea where he might have gone?" Sofie asked softly.

Eric looked up only briefly, "Uh, No. Callen is anything BUT a creature of habit."

"Where's his home?" Nate asked.

A sigh of frustration escaped Eric's lips, "He doesn't have one. Well, actually he did… once, but that was five years ago, maybe? He gave it away. Now, he just moves around. Everything he owns is in his duffel. He didn't even own furniture when he had a house… or anything else you'd find in a home…. Okay, he had a few pieces but he chopped them up and burned them or threw them out when his girlfriend turned out to be a spy for the CIA… Of course, she's dead now because someone just murdered her in order to get to Callen… That's why HE'S gone now. Well, no, he's most LIKELY gone because he doesn't trust anyone…" Eric stopped rambling after looking up to see the shocked looks on everyone's faces, "buuuuuuut that's another story for another time probably. So, the answer to your question is… no, I have no clue where he is or how to find him if he doesn't activate his phone."

The room fell into silence until Parker spoke up, "It's no wonder he's so sad. He can't trust anyone because they always hurt him."

"I wouldn't say EVERYONE… I believe in him." Eric argued.

"He needs a family." Parker continued.

"Agreed." Eric smiled in return.

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Early the next morning, Eric quickly said his goodbyes before heading to work.

"You haven't even slept," Sofie stated caringly.

"Not the first time. I'll be back after work. I'll let you know if I find anything before then. I just have to be careful." Eric replied with a small smile of appreciation.

"I would like to meet this Hetty Lange." Nate was adamant.

Eric was uncertain of how to handle the request. If only Callen were there. "Now is not a good time. She is unaware of my working with Callen… let alone you. If Callen is right… best to keep it that way."

"For now, maybe," he agreed.

Eric looked at the man questioningly, uncertain of his intentions but if he went with his gut, he'd swear the man was prepared to defend Callen.

"I'll be back. If you need anything, call me. But stay low." Eric said as he shut the door.

He was relieved to find the building bathed in silence still when he arrived. He quickly set to work bringing the ops center to life. As the computers began to hum, he started looking at all the programs he had running as one thing became blatantly obvious. Someone had been trolling his work. He had painstakingly buried his searches behind other programs in order to protect it from prying eyes. Someone had found them. That someone was Nell Jones. He knew her electronic footprint. The first thought he had was fear for his job… fear of Hetty's reaction. The demand for answers he couldn't give… not yet. He'd made a promise. He knew what he needed to do. First, though, he needed to have a chat with someone…

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Nell knew the minute she entered the OPS center, something was wrong. Eric was setting there waiting for her and he was angry. It was rare to find him upset like this. He was ordinarily a very easy-going guy… nervous but cheerful. Lately, however, he'd been more secretive. He had become bolder and carried himself differently. His shoulders were more squared… he was stronger even… in personality. She liked this new Eric as much as she was concerned by him. One thing she knew for sure and she had warned them all about, was that he was better than her when it came to hacking. Yes, they were both geniuses when it came to their work but their skillsets were vastly different in many ways.

"Morning Eric…" she approached him carefully.

"Nell. We need to talk." He couldn't hide the anger and disappointment he felt.

Nell regarded the man before her. She cared so deeply for him. They had finally begun exploring the prospects of dating. She prayed this wouldn't ruin that, "Okay, I agree."

Eric cleared his throat and dove in, "Okay, why have you been snooping through my stuff?"

"I… I didn't want to, Beale… and I didn't find much. You cover your bases well. But, why? For who?"

"It's none of your business and you didn't answer my question." He replied.

"Hetty and the team asked me to. They are worried about you, Eric… So am I. You've changed. You've become more secretive and moodier… edgy… you'd think you were taking a page out of Callen's book." She chuckled nervously.

Eric almost visibly puffed up at the implication.

"Seriously, Beale? Are you working for Callen? If so, you need to tell Hetty or at least the rest of the team. They are worried." She pleaded.

"They're worried? Where was that concern BEFORE he left?" he demanded.

"Eric, that's not fair." Nell argued.

"What's not fair is the lack of faith they had in him. They don't really even know Callen. They only know what they want him to be." Eric found himself defending Callen.

"And you do? You think you know Callen?" Nell asked skeptically.

Eric thought a moment, "Maybe not as much as I'd like but yeah, some. He just wants to keep everyone safe. Not that they care. Why? Why are you digging through my stuff?" He demanded.

"The team… and Hetty wants to know what Callen was looking into. If it makes you feel better, I don't know anything other than you're keeping secrets." Nell offered quietly.

"No, it doesn't… you don't trust me enough to just ask? Instead you disrespected my space." Eric railed.

"But I did ask." Nell explained.

"And I told you, no. I told you to leave it alone… but, as usual, you didn't listen. You know, Callen has always given me more credit than any of you." Eric grabbed his things and left without another word… ignoring Nell's calling after him.

"Eric!" She yelled, "Well, crap." She huffed, falling into her chair.

Eric was relieved to find Hetty hadn't as yet arrived for the day. Laying his leave slip on her desk, he moved toward the back to avoid any more team members looking for information he either didn't have or couldn't share even if he did. He had what he needed in order to do what was required from where Leverage was. He quickly went back to his place to grab his stuff and headed on his way, praying Callen would get his message regarding Eliot.


	31. Chapter 31

**DISCLAIMER** **: Why can't I simply say this once in the beginning of the story… I DO NOT own any character from the following three shows: NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. This is like salt in the wound.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: YAY! New favorites and follows! Thank you! I feel so blessed. Thank you so much for all the reviews, you are FANTASTIC! I do hope you continue to do so as we progress through this story. We are nearing the half way point here. I am shocked. It's moving so fast. If you are just joining us… remember, there are three stories that play into this specific storyline. (On the Other Side of Fear Lies Freedom, The G Callen Job, and A Time to Remember). If you haven't, as yet, left a review… I encourage you to do so. I love hearing from the readers. I have the story written and ready to go, so I know where it's headed… but I love hearing where you, the reader, think it's going or what the character's are likely to do… No story is every truly over and can change in a moment's notice. I'm not beyond tweaking, if it works within the realm of where I want the story to go. So please, leave a note. If not, I do hope you are enjoying the story and know that you are appreciated for taking the time to read my story. Okay, shutting up in 3, 2, 1…**

"He what?" Sam asked as Hetty updated him as to the morning's events.

"Eric found out Miss Jones has been snooping on our behalf and decided to call in his leave time."

"So, he IS working for Callen then." He stated, lost in thought. He wished he had made more headway with Callen so that he would have turned to him now. He didn't, however, and despite that desire, Sam couldn't help being angry with Callen's refusal to allow them even an inch where those infernal walls of his were concerned.

"Yes, it appears so."

"Why aren't you more upset?" Sam asked, surprised. Eric had been keeping secrets from her. Though a bit hypocritical, was something she would not tolerate from her team members. He figured it was one thing that would always remain a bone of contention between her and Callen.

"Because, Mr. Hanna… a couple reasons, actually. First, Mr. Callen is not alone out there after all. Eric knows at least some of what he plans to do, I should think. I have to believe that were things to go awry, Eric knows we will be here." Hetty explained.

"And secondly?" Sam asked curiously.

"Secondly, our Mr. Beale has graduated to the big league. He has learned to stand up for himself. He has joined all of you in your defiance of following orders from time to time… regardless of the consequences." Hetty replied with a smirk of her own.

Sam had to grin. Eric had always been easily intimidated into divulging information. No one was better at that than Callen… but then Eric had always looked up to Callen. It was fitting he would be the one to get Eric to step up to his potential.

"So, we wait it out? Sam asked.

"Do we have a choice?" Hetty asked, her brows raised in question.

"Guess not." he sighed standing up to head back to his desk.

"Sam," she stopped his retreat, "Not all is lost. Mr. Callen has put his faith into one of us."

Sam nodded his acceptance then turned to update the others. He was glad Callen had chosen to trust at least one of them. He was just sorry it couldn't have been him. They had been so close once. He never, in a million years, had thought the day would come where they wouldn't turn to each other when in trouble.

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Callen watched as Aiden and Kamran walked slowly through the San Francisco Zoo together. He noticed how Aiden had taken their talk seriously. He had gone above and beyond to protect his sister. He also found that Kamran was a natural. She knew her surroundings. While Aiden made every appearance at being a budding Seal in the making… Kamran took after her mother. Michelle would be proud and terrified for her. It was in her blood. With enough training, she'd be able to keep herself safe. He needed to put more thought into that. Sam may not approve of the idea of her being drawn into that life. For now, she was safe. Given the time, he could teach them enough to protect themselves in an emergency until they could escape. Unfortunately, he wouldn't have that kind of time. He needed to see to it that someone else did.

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"Mr. Beale, this is unexpected." Nate opened the door in surprise.

"Yeah, well, you have a couch I can borrow? Can't stay at my place. The team will no doubt be looking for me." Eric replied.

"Uh, sure. What happened," Nate asked.

"They started snooping. I promised Callen not to involve them." Eric explained.

"I see. Well, now we simply need to find Callen," Nate added.

"Working on it," Eric muttered, sitting down at the table to set his computers up and get his programs running once more.

"I'll leave you to it." Nate stated as he turned and walked away.

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The morning passed uneventfully into the afternoon with no word from Callen and nothing more in the search. The next few days would follow suit.

Unbeknownst to the OSP, Eric was also keeping tabs on what they were doing. Concern began to grow in the pit of his stomach as word came that Deeks and Kensi had been involved in a car accident perpetrated by shooters on the highway. There was no doubt that Deeks and Kensi were the intended targets. Other than a few bruises from being pushed off the road, however, they were both safe. He found it odd that whoever it was that was shooting at them had chosen to leave them alive.

A day later, Sam was awakened by gun fire riddling his home. The kids had come home for a long weekend and had been there when the shooting occurred. Again, the shooters seemed content with simply shooting the place up, never attempting to actually entering the home in order to make sure their mark had been hit.

Nell had told the team on several occasions that she felt she was being followed. On the same morning that the shooting occurred she found herself being followed yet again, only this time the perpetrator had made no attempt at hiding themselves as they taunted her, until finally they began ramming into her rear bumper, forcing her off the road before shooting out her back tires.

"What the hell is going on?" Sam roared as he entered Ops center.

"We are uncertain as of right now… but if I were to hazard a guess…" Hetty replied thoughtfully, looking around the assembled team, "My guess is it has something to do with a call Leon received from the powers that be with Blackguard. It appears we are not the only ones looking for Mr. Callen."

"Are you saying they are trying to off their own people?" Deeks replied, alarmed at the prospect.

"I cannot say for sure. However, I find the timing quite coincidental if not. All these incidents could have ended disastrously… but they didn't." Hetty explained, "I believe they were to act as a warning."

"A warning, about what?" Kensi asked, confused.

"About who is carrying the bigger stick, Miss Blye." Hetty replied. She had continued referring to Kensi by her maiden name even after the wedding so as to avoid headaches from the higher ups in regards to them being on the same team.

"My kids were in that house. Where the Hell is Callen? He claims he's always watching." Sam growled.

"I'm right here…"

The entire room turned at the familiar voice.

"Callen!" Kensi ran up and grabbed him in a hug, not thinking what his reaction might be.

Deeks stepped closer out of concern for just that but was taken back by the shocked look on Callens face and the awkward uncertainty in how to deal with it. Soon enough, Kensi came to her senses and quickly backed away while apologizing.

"We've just been so worried." she responded.

Callen watched her with a look she couldn't quite define. Finally, he turned his attention to Sam."

"The kids are fine and they will stay that way." Callen's tone… ominous.

"Mr. Callen, what have you done?" Hetty's concern was evident, which bothered Callen. The woman had been messing in his affairs his whole life… why did it bother him so much that she seemed worried about him?

"What needed to be done and nothing that concerns you." He replied coldly. Looking around at the faces in the room he drew back to Hetty.

"Where's Eric?" he asked simply.

"Mr. Beale has chosen to take an extended leave. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, now would you, Mr. Callen?" Hetty asked.

"Extended leave?" Callen repeated, though skeptically, brows raised in question.

"Yes, Mr. Callen. My guess is, he will return when you no longer require his assistance." She replied knowingly.

Callen said nothing but gave an almost amused look with a glint in his now piercing blue eyes. Turning toward the door he stopped and faced the table in the center of the room. Running his hands along the table edge to the sides he leaned forward on his hands slightly, his back to the rest of the team. "Sam" he said looking down at the table, "the kids should stay here for the time being."

"I can't do that. They have school." Sam argued, "We'll put agents in place to keep an eye on things."

"Then you do whatever you do to get them cleared for leave, Henrietta… but those kids aren't to go back until whatever THIS is, is over…" Callen turned to face the group. The look in his eyes matched the tone in his voice, "and while they are here, you might want to consider working with them on self-defense."

"What? You come in here and tell me how to manage my life and those of my kids… and expect me to just follow along, no question?" Sam demanded. "Why? What is going on that MY kids need to be taught self-defense? What have you gotten yourself into? Tell us and we can help you!"

"I promised to watch out for those kids and I will for as long as I can and to the best of my ability… but Sam, I can't promise I will always be there. They need to be able to protect themselves, especially Kamran. There is no reason Kensi can't teach her a few things. You and Deeks can work with Aiden. I NEED to know they're safe!" Callen's voice raised with each word as he chose to leave the latter questions unanswered.

"It will be handled, Mr. Callen. Now perhaps you can tell me what's going on. What don't we know?" Hetty asked gingerly.

"Seems to me, you should be the one answering that question." Callen eyed her carefully.

"As I said before… I don't know near as much as you give me credit for. Please, Callen, please let us help you." She pleaded.

Callen looked her in the eye. He longed to be able to confide in her… in this team. He wished he could trust them to have his back… but every time he came close to giving in, he heard the words they used against him over and over. They didn't trust him, he wasn't worthy of a family, he was a monster. He was no longer able to separate their words from his own that he used to justify his being alone in this world. It was that very issue that stopped him now.

"Unless you are willing to tell me what game you've been playing and who else is involved, then we have nothing more to talk about. Your day of reckoning is coming Hetty." Callen's voice a deep rumble as he exited the Ops center.


	32. Chapter 32

**DISCLAIMER** **: Blah, blah, blah, not mine… blah blah blah… NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. None of the characters belong to me. We are just having some fun. Perhaps the writers will catch wind and decided to do the same. WHAT LOL**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: So here we are… OH MY GOODNESS! Time to up the ante, if you will. Don't hate me…**

"Damn" Sam wiped a hand over his face as he turned to towards Hetty, "You're certain there's nothing more you can tell us?"

"Sam, I understand your questioning me but I sincerely know little else than I've already divulged. I made the original list. I gave it to my superiors who, if my guess is correct, handed it over to be used for more nefarious reasons than what was originally intended. I don't know for certain who but the why became frighteningly obvious." Hetty assured.

"But Hetty, it's no surprise you took in other kids. When we first found out about Grace and Lauren, it bothered G. I thought you explained it to him." Sam stated.

"Oh, I did but Sam, regardless of the tough and confident exterior… There is a part of Mr. Callen that will forever feel the hurt of being cheated of a family he never had. Rightfully so. I fear what may now be coming to light."

"Well, we still have no idea…" Sam grumbled.

"He was concerned enough to want your kids safe", Kensi stated.

"Yeah, he was pretty dang adamant about that too." Deeks agreed.

"There's no doubt he knows more than he's telling. We need more information and fast. He thinks I'm the enemy… in the meantime the real trouble is out there manipulating this entire mess." Hetty added.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen climbed in his car and immediately put the battery in his phone and dialed Eric as he prepared to pull his car out onto the busy street.

"Callen, where the heck have you been!?" Eric shouted into the phone.

"What's going on, Eric? You left OSP?" Callen asked.

"What? How did you know about that?" Eric responded, pausing momentarily before beginning once more, "Know what? Not important…! I was trying to get a hold of you… There's something you need to know."

"What?" Callen repeated the question.

Eric thought about the answer and decided on the direct approach… "Eliot is missing".

There was momentary silence before Callen replied gruffly, "How long?"

"About 4 or 5 days" Eric replied quietly, "I tried to get in touch with you but…"

Callen didn't let him finish, "You have nothing to explain… it's on me. Do we know anything?"

"No, sorry, but we're still looking."

"Where are you" Callen asked.

"Sent to your phone, we'll be waiting."

"Eric" Callen called out before he could hang up.

"Yeah, Callen?" Eric asked nervously.

"You did good. Thank you. I won't forget your loyalty." Callen offered earnestly.

"… I promised I would have your back… I meant it." Eric returned with equal honesty.

"Be there soon."

Eric hung up and turned to face his friends.

"You failed to mention we are here," Nate stated.

"Yeah, well… some things are better left for in person. Trust me." Eric explained. He knew Callen would not be happy with Eliot's decision to remain in LA and was in no mind to face that wrath alone. Nope, they'd face that tsunami together.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen made quick work of his trip to find Eric. He questioned the address location. It was beyond Eric's ability to afford and not an area he would have suggested. Ignoring yet another call from Blackguard, he climbed out of the car and placed the phone in his pocket. Blackguard had become quite adamant about his returning to duties. Still, he was not ready to chip away at what little of his soul remained.

The knock came, causing Eric to jump. Not missing the reaction and uncertain of the reason, Nate went to answer the door. He began to possibly understand as he spied the agitated Callen through the peep hole. He also understood why he had avoided telling him of their presence.

"Nate?" Callen couldn't hide his surprise.

"Callen. Glad you could make it."

"What the hell are you doing here?" Callen asked again.

"Eliot called and informed us of the case you are working on and he needed us here…" Nate offered.

"He needed you here… he was SUPPOSED to go and keep you all AWAY from here. Should have known he wouldn't listen… Eric, what do we know?"

"Not much. Nothing on Cameras anywhere… otherwise, I've intercepted several attempts by Blackguard to contact you. They REALLY want you back."

Callen rolled his eyes and sighed as a trickle of concern ran along his spine… he didn't like the thoughts that came with it.

"Where exactly did he go when he left here?" he asked.

"He said he was going to get food… he just needed to clear his head," Hardison answered.

"Yeah. He does that when he's done peopling." Parker offered helpfully. "So, you're going to find our Eliot, right G Callen?"

Callen glanced around the room before setting eyes on the young woman watching him with a completely trusting look.

"I'm going to do my best. I need you all to cooperate and stay put. Do you hear me? I don't need to have to worry about your safety. Eric, keep looking… stay here. OSP doesn't know where you are, right?"

"Of course not." Eric answered indignantly.

Callen chuckled, "Alright, sorry, I should have known."

Walking over to the computer, Eric sat down to open the oncoming information. Callen excused himself as his phone rang, surprised by the caller.

"Marie? This is a surprise. How are you?... You're here? In LA?... Is Victor with you?... Marie, what's wrong?... Yeah, I'll see you then," Callen stood for a moment thinking before turning to join the others. Marie was upset. He hadn't seen her since he came back with Gibbs after the Comescu take down. He'd promised her then if she'd ever needed help, to call. After all they'd done to help him, he owed them that much.

"Hey, I have to go out for a while. You find anything else, you call me Eric. I want to know ASAP." Callen stated, heading for the door.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Marie nervously fiddled with the skirt of her dress. It had been a very long time since she'd been back in the states. Many things had changed but many remained the same.

She loved the California sun… the comforting warmth, that much she had missed. That wasn't to say she hadn't enjoyed the life she had chosen all those many years ago. She had fallen in love and had two beautiful children. Children now grown with families of their own. Completely unaware of her and Victor's previous lives. The very lives that brought them together. Lives she failed to mention when she sat with Callen that day that seemed forever ago now.

She remembered, all too clearly, the words of warning spoken by Jethro Gibbs. He advised she not keep secrets pertaining to G Callen. This, however, seemed like a safe one to keep. The list was 40 years old now. She had thought with the passing of the original group; the evils of that list were put to rest. It wasn't until Garrison brought his son to their door that day that she became aware the Blackguard had reassembled. Soon after, he had gone back to the states she had begun to suspect it was not all that had been resurrected. Now she found herself separated not only from her children but the man she thought she knew, that she loved.

Nerves got the better of her and she began to pace the room. The more she considered the choice she made to travel here and defy her own husband for a little boy she had carried in her heart for so very many years… now a grown man and just as lost as the first time she'd met him, the more she prayed she had made the right decision. She made a promise to protect this boy… this man. She made this promise to his mother and father. She had hoped it would never come to this again. Now he needed to know. He needed to know about the list. They needed to put an end to the list and save the next generation.

She was looking out the window when the door opened quietly from behind.

"Grisha, you are early," she said as she turned towards the visitor.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, my dear." came the reply.

"How did you find me?" Marie asked, her eyes wide.

"We've been married a long time. You learn a lot about a person when you live with them for so long…"

"Yes, you do. There is also the sad realization that you don't always get to know the whole person… as is the case here, isn't it, husband? You know why I have come. This can't continue. It's not right. It's not the true purpose for that list. It never was." Marie stated.

"That's where you are wrong, Marie. It was always the plan. Henrietta Lange still believed in the old school way of doing things. Meanwhile, our enemies were growing and getting smarter and stronger. We were woefully unprepared. Our training was obsolete. Our agents were not prepared. We needed to think bigger, plan sooner… These kids were the future. Like any soldier they are willing to put their lives on the line so others might live safely unaware of the many wolves howling at our doors…"

"They were children, Victor. They were innocence. They should have had the choice. They were the ones we should have been protecting… not exploiting them. They deserved to have their parents with them… to grow up playing. They took all of that away from them… They killed their parents so they could steal their childhood away from them. Victor, that's why we left the agency… so our children didn't have to know… didn't have to follow in our footsteps." Marie cried.

"It is why you quit, my dear. I have continued to work these many years. As for our children, they are weak. You are a perfect example of why we did what we did. Those brats were better off in the care of their handlers, where their innate abilities would be nurtured. Consider Callen." Victor retorted.

"Yes, consider Callen! He has grown up alone and wanting. He…"

"He is stronger because of us. He is a brilliant operative."

Marie looked at this man in front of her… how could she not know she had been married to a monster all these years, "And that is all he is! He deserved more… better. He still does. The boy needed family. He finally found that outside the Blackguards clutches… and now you have once again destroyed it."

"Yes, and as I said, he is stronger because of it. They made him weak. He is an agent through and through. Anything else is a mere distraction which needs to be squashed. He needs to focus. Eliot is no different. They slipped our grasp once but not this time. Can't you see? They are two of our greatest weapons? These kids grow up to be the next generation of our country's best line of defense. Callen understands that is his purpose." Victor tried to persuade her understanding. Marie wasn't having it.

"No. No more husband. What you have done for all those years and are doing again now… is nothing short of murder and abuse. You are taking innocent children and turning them into cold blooded murderers. You are turning them into monsters just like you! I can't stand by and watch you destroy any more lives." Marie threatened as Victor turned to face her.

"Oh, my dear… I feared you would say that." Without another word he drew his gun and fired.

Marie staggered back and fell to the ground. Victor knelt down next to her, "My beautiful wife… why did you force me to do this. All you had to do was mind your own business. Be a mother to our children and grandmother to their children… I guess once an agent, always an agent, eh? Sticking your nose where it doesn't belong. Why is Callen so important to you? He is nothing to us. He is nothing more than a valuable tool in our government's toolbox… nothing more. That, my sweet, was the plan. They provide the skill and expertise needed to do what others cannot. What others do not have the stomach for. Like OUR children… too soft… too righteous… too afraid of the consequences. If it wasn't for us training people like Callen and Eliot to become the excellent killers they are, this country would have been overrun by now."

"You think those boys aren't affected by that killing or the torture they are forced to inflict? They are not robots, Victor." Marie stated as she fought for breath.

"They are not boys, either. They are well trained assassins. They knew what they were getting into when they took the job." Victor argued.

"They weren't given a choice. You took everything good from them. You took their worth away." Marie struggled to stay conscious.

"It is no longer your business. You are merely one more reason why Callen will decide to return to where he truly belongs. Before it's all said and done, he will know there is no one who wants him… he is simply a liability. Should he continue to fight his calling, I will be forced to show him the error of his ways."

"Please Victor, don't do this." Marie begged.

"Hush now… rest, knowing you have not died in vain. You have helped me here more than you realize. He will come soon… do me a favor, won't you, and die before he gets here." Victor kissed her forehead and walked away, leaving his wife bleeding out on the floor.

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Thank you to every single reader out there who has taken the time to read my stories. I appreciate you all. Thank you for the notes and the reviews! I would love to hear from all of you… ya know, if ya want to… See you in the next chapter! Don't forget to click on that little box down there and type a few little thoughts before you leave!**


	33. Chapter 33

**DISCLAIMER** **: OK, none of the characters from NCIS, NCIS LA, Leverage, belong to me… NOW, Marie and Victor? They are ALLLLLLLLL mine… for better or worse. HA! MINE!**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi all! Time for another installment… are you ready? LOL! It's getting fun now. Not that it wasn't before but… you know… For the GUEST who asked about stories with Victor and Marie… These characters are of my creation and they were at the beginning of this series of stories. If you are interested in reading where they came from and haven't done so yet… please read, "On the Other Side of Fear Lies Freedom". To all of you, THANK YOU! Thank you for joining me and this fantastically crazy group of characters on this journey. Ready or not… have at it and PLEASE, review when you are finished.**

Callen sped along toward his meeting with Marie. He couldn't fathom a reason as to why she would be in LA. Her tone and urgency were enough to tell him it wasn't good, whatever it was.

Pulling into the hotel parking lot, Callen felt a knot forming in his gut. Something felt off. Someone was watching. He scanned the area for cameras and found none. He then searched for anything out of place. Slowly he walked toward the building, the feeling intensifying as he neared Marie's room. When she didn't answer on the second knock, he pulled his gun and tried, finding the door unlocked.

"Marie? It's Callen," he called out upon entering. He heard something… a moan? Callen walked further into the room and searched for the source of the sound.

"Marie!" he yelled out in shock. Re-holstering his gun, he rushed to her side, "Marie, who did this to you?" Callen asked while attempting to stem the flow of blood leaving her body. Finding a towel, he pushed on the wound, alarmed by the pool of blood already forming beneath her. "Come on Marie, don't do this." He begged grabbing his phone and dialing for help. Once he was certain they were on their way, he again set his attention on the woman in front of him. "Marie, come on, I need you to wake up for me. Don't leave me, Marie… Come on!" he yelled in desperation.

A soft moan escaped her lips before her eyelids fluttered open.

"That's it, come on. I need you to talk to me. Tell me who did this to you."

"Grisha…"

"Marie, who did this?" Callen asked, again.

"Grisha", she said again as her hand moved to the neckline of her dress. Pulling a USB drive from a hidden pocket inside the neckline… she handed the drive to Callen grasping his hand in the process.

"Grisha, please, you must see this… you must listen… stay away… stay… away… Victor..."

"Where is Victor? Did he come with you?" Callen asked, "Marie! Is Victor in danger?"

Sirens could be heard coming closer and closer, the sound louder. Marie gasped for a desperate bit of air in an effort to speak. "Po..cket… listen… read… stay away… Victor", with no further energy left to form sentences, the message was cryptic at best. Callen looked down at what she wore in search of a pocket. Finding it, he felt for its contents and removed a cell phone which he then pocketed himself along with the USB drive wrapped in paper.

As the paramedics loaded Marie into the back of the ambulance, Callen called Eric to alert the hospital and find someone to stand in as protection detail.

As soon as he returned to their temporary base of operations, he handed over the USB drive, "Get that USB going. I need to know what's on it."

Eric immediately set to work pulling up the information for Callen to see.

"Eric, is that what I think it is?" Callen asked.

"The list." Eric stated, pulling it up.

"That's the original list… the one Hetty wrote," Callen stated…

"There's another list, Callen. It was the paper wrapped around the drive when you handed it to me. Only there are more names on this one. Aiden and Kamran are on this… Does that mean…" Eric started.

"That there is a renewed effort at this Raven's and Swan's initiative? That Sam's kids are among their new targets? I don't know… we are missing something." He answered. "I need to see Marie… let me know when she's out of surgery."

"Will do." Eric answered as Callen tapped his shoulder appreciatively…

"Callen." Nate called out as he was headed for the door.

"What is it, Nate." Callen asked, turning back.

"Who are these people?" he asked.

"Not sure I know how to answer that. Victor saved my life a while back. Claimed to be friends of my parents." Callen shrugged.

"I can see why you are so skeptical of people's intentions… but I promise you, they aren't all bad. Sounds like this Marie is sincere..."

"Take nothing at face value. You only have one person in this life you can count on and that person is you." Callen stated, his tone matter of fact.

"That's a sad statement. Do you honestly feel that way?" Sofie spoke up quietly.

Callen smiled sadly, speaking in a broken whisper, "There was a time, for a while, the answer to that question would have been no… but things change. I'll be back soon. Oh, Eric, look through her phone. See what you can find, I need to know who her contact is." Callen tossed the phone as he closed the door behind him.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Having no where in particular to go until he got the call on Marie, Callen simply drove around while his mind spun with everything that had happened thus far. Despite his own concerns he agreed to come back to this team and try again. He still didn't understand why it had happened… considering everything that had happened over the past five plus years. Why? Why did they want him back so bad? Was it because of what he could do for NCIS? The team seemed sincere in their efforts but then weren't they all taught how to lie when needed? Now this. The team was being put in harms way, once more, because of him. Eliot was missing and the team he had joined, the family he had created, was missing him… that was on Callen. Joelle was dead… because of him. Now Marie… and what about Victor? He hadn't heard anything and he hadn't answered their calls in quite some time… was Gibbs safe? Ziva? Abby? He couldn't bare it if something happened to Abby… Abby, who wouldn't hurt anyone or anything. Callen slammed his fist against the steering wheel in anger and frustration. He was no good for anyone. All he ever did was bring pain to the people in his life.

His thoughts were interrupted by the ring of his phone. It was Eric, informing him that Marie was settled in her room now. Quickly he turned the car in the direction of the hospital. He needed to know what happened and what Marie knew regarding the list… He needed to figure it out and soon before anyone else got hurt.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

He quietly entered the hospital room. Eric had seen to it that guards had been stationed at the door for Maria's protection.

He stood, silently, listening to the rhythmic beat of the monitors. She was pale and other than the oxygen canula helping her to breathe, she seemed to be sleeping peacefully… she didn't stir at his presence and he didn't expect her to. Between the anesthesia still exiting her system and the pain medication it would be a bit before she'd awaken. Pulling the chair closer to the bed, he settled in for the wait.

It was rare for him to be sitting on this side of the monitors. He avoided hospitals at all costs not only as a patient but as a visitor as well… Normally, if it were someone he knew, the reasons were usually critical. In his line of business, especially with 'the agency', life was tenuous, things happened. Life or death things. If he were to look at anything as black and white… it would have to be the life span of an agent.

Death was expected far more likely than old age. If he were superstitious, he would find visiting in a hospital to be tempting fate… not something he could afford to do these days. This time, however, was different. Marie deserved better than she got. Regardless of what her truth was… Marie had been kind to him… Victor, too, had been good to him. Anger forced him from his chair to pace in front of the window.

"Grisha… always so angry… you were once such a happy boy", a voice whispered in the dark, jolting him from his brooding thoughts.

"Marie," he returned, his voice equal in its softness, "you had me worried."

"Puh! I am not worthy of such concern."

"This wasn't of your doing." Callen replied darkly.

"No… but my Victor…" her voice faltered, "I'm so sorry, Grisha. I had no idea Victor had such… such horrible secrets."

Callen looked at her, "Victor… what are you talking about?"

"Did you not look at the things I gave you? Did you not listen?" Marie asked at the shocked look on Callen's face.

"I saw the lists… I saw what appeared to be a recently made list that contains the names of my partner's children…"

"The phone…" Marie stated.

"Eric is going through the phone as we speak. What don't I know, Marie? What secrets have you been keeping?" Callen bristled at the thought of one more person who felt compelled to keep things from him.

"Understand that I did not know these things until just recently. He fooled us all." Marie explained, "Victor worked for those who used the list. I am so sorry, Grisha. Victor…" she sobbed.

Callen thought back on the time he'd lived in their home, relying on the very man they spoke of to help him survive his own severe injuries…. How even Gibbs seemed oblivious to the lies. Maybe he wasn't the only one slipping in their diligence to detail."

"Marie, I need for you to explain this list to me. Victor… was he the head over the Raven and Swan initiative?"

"Victor? No, I don't believe so. He worked for them… that, I do believe. The original creator of the Blackguard is who you would be looking for." She answered.

"And now?" Callen asked.

"Now? Oh, I couldn't answer that for certain. It is painfully obvious that Victor has indeed raised in the ranks." A tear stubbornly escaped her closed lids as they fought against the pain which the facts brought her.

"Marie, who did this to you?" Callen asked, dreading the answer.

"Dear boy… it is not important. What is important is that you need to stay away from Blackguard… from Victor." Marie spoke softly.

"Victor did this, didn't he?" Callen growled.

Marie didn't answer, which only confirmed his suspicions… Callen's voice dropped to a mere whisper, hoarse with emotion.

"And Henrietta Lange?" he asked as he slid into the chair next to her bed.

Marie looked sympathetically at the man next to her… equally broken by betrayal.

"Clara's handler?"

"Is or was she the head over Blackguard? I know she was the creator of the list." He asked once more.

"Oh, my dear boy… she may be guilty of many things, but running Blackguard? No. Betraying your mother willingly? Never… No, Hetty has done many things but purposely setting out to hurt her dear friend and by doing so endangering the lives of you children? No, I cannot believe so… your government here is to blame for your misery and so many others it would seem." she answered.

"Why, though? How?" Callen asked.

"So many agents hide their families, if you will, for safety reasons. That was the reason for the list. The guise was, they wanted to protect the children. Something happens to the agent/parents, the children would be safe from their enemies." Marie explained.

"The guise…" Callen urged her on.

"Yes, from what I have been able to gather, they wanted access to possible future agents. Those children with a family of government agents were of special interest. Such as you, Grisha. You and Amy had grandparents and parents who were agents. You had a pedigree, if you will. It was the very thing your parents wanted to avoid. That you had agents from both sides in your history made you even more desirable. Hetty warned your parents that there was this possibility."

"Wait, but that list wasn't created until after… until Amy and I came to America…"

"Yes, but when Hetty created that list… it was to protect the children. She was unaware that someone had given the list to Blackguard… until it was too late. I had been charged with helping keep you safe. Victor was put in place to keep an eye on your mother's enemies."

"The Comescus", Callen interjected.

"Yes, or so I was led to believe. We had gone in as a married couple, only we fell in love. Soon we found ourselves with our own children… far enough away from our own government that we could easily hide our family. Little did I know…" she replied bitterly.

"He played you." Callen stated, equally bitter, "So, you are American agents, both of you?"

"We are… but it was a long-term op. When it became apparent the Comescus were going to make a move on your mother, I put in a call to extract Clara and you children."

"What about Garrison?" Callen asked.

"Originally, we weren't even sure which side they were on… when it became clear what your father was truly up to and that she had all but recruited him, I offered to get them all out. However, my husband went behind my back and turned Garrison in and he was imprisoned. I believe we can thank Victor for Hetty being delayed." Marie tried to make him understand.

"And my mother's murder…" Callen scowled.

"Yes," Marie answered as a tear slid down her cheek.

"So, when I stayed with you…" Callen started

"I was completely unaware of Victor's business. We chose a life together, had children… I believed he loved me. I had no clue… I am so terribly sorry, Grisha."

Callen looked into her eyes and saw the sorrow there. He knew her energy was waning but there were things he wanted to know.

"Why did you lie to me? Why didn't you tell me any of this… that you were an agent… that you knew Hetty? The list… my mother's murder, Amy's death." He could have gone on but he didn't want to overwhelm her.

"Grisha, you were in no condition to hear any of this and at the time I was oblivious to Victor's part in it all… or that he was the reason you were now a Renegade. Besides, you were already burdened with so much hate, pain, and anger from what happened back here. How was my telling you this going to help you?" Marie reasoned.

"Don't you think I had a right to know? Why is everyone trying to control my life… I'm strong enough, smart enough to be the agent everyone needs or wants… but my life is not my own. I just keep finding more and more just how much of a puppet I am to everyone. You all just think you can manipulate my every move." He growled angrily.

"Grisha, please… there is another truth your anger is refusing to allow you to see."

"Does it matter? Right now, I simply need to know what the point of this is. Why are they using it to get me back with Blackguard? Why is Blackguard so adamant about my return?" Callen stated plainly, "What is the end game here?"

"You are good at what you do. Jethro Gibbs, Hetty Lange, Owen Granger… they all have mentioned how talented an agent you are… that you are one of the best agents they have worked with. I can only imagine what they think of you in the Blackguard."

"I'm the perfect little killer."

Marie sighed and laid her head back against the pillow, "What will it take for you to realize that all these people you are angry with have spent their lives protecting yours… to the point of giving their lives should it be required. They care about you. They too had their lives controlled by way of protecting you."

Callen looked at her disbelievingly, "Care about me?"

"Why is that so hard to believe?" she stifled a yawn.

"I'm sorry, you need to rest. I have guards posted for your protection. If you need anything, call this number and ask for Eric." Callen offered.

"Grisha, where are you going? You must stay away from Victor."

"That's going to be difficult… his people are holding a friend of mine… who, coincidentally, is also on this precious list. I need to get to the bottom of this." He replied.

"Grisha… no. Let the others."

"What others? There ARE no others… I will not put anyone else in danger because of me. I'll check on you later," he stated, leaving Marie to worry over what to do next.

The longer this went on, the more he realized that the life he was living wasn't his choice at all. They had all been manipulating him since the start. The team may not have, but then they were hired by none other than Henrietta Lange in an effort to control him. He didn't know what to think. Callen headed back in order to find out what Marie had saved on her phone.


	34. Chapter 34

**DISCLAIMER** **: I do not own any of the characters from NCIS LA, NCIS, Leverage. However, Marie and Victor are mine… they came from my imagination and therefore they are mine, mine, mine!**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Another day, another chapter. Are you ready? I had someone ask me about Marie being under protection in the hospital. Callen, as you recall, has many contacts throughout the agencies. People who knew he was on the outs with his team and who would have his back if he called them. So, I left it with the assumption that Callen would have instructed Eric accordingly as to who to call to guard Marie. As for her being shot… it would not be unheard of that someone was shot… hello, watch the show, hahahahaha… and there would be nothing to alert the team that THIS particular shoot would be connected to Callen. I hope, if you are questioning this issue as well, that it explains it. If not, shoot me a message and I will try to explain further. I'm just bummed that I didn't just put that in when I did the re-read before posting and found it bothersome myself. LOL. Well, I have nothing much else to say. Thank you so much for all your reviews… KEEP THEM COMING! PLLLLLLEEEEEAAAASSSSEEE.**

Walking into the suite, he knew by the look on everyone's faces, that whatever Eric had found was not going to make him happy. "What did you find, Eric?" he asked tiredly.

"Marie managed to turn her phone recorder on and taped nearly the entire conversation she had with her husband." Eric stated cautiously.

"So, I was right… he shot her." Callen surmised.

"Yeah, he did."

Callen glanced at the group surrounding them, "Okay, so, play it…"

Not another sound could be heard above the recording. Callen, caught up in what was being said, was oblivious to anything around him. It was as if he were alone. His breathing shallowed as he listened to Victor speak of him and Eliot as if they were nothing more than objects to be used whenever and however they were needed… He slowly slid to the floor, leaning against the wall as he heard Marie echo the words of his partner once upon a time… that he was nothing more than a murderer, a monster. They couldn't all be wrong. Victor was right about one thing… he wasn't worth the pain he ultimately caused others who dared to care about him. There were only two kinds of people in his world… those who sought to control him and those who needed protected from him for that very reason. Victor made it very clear that there was only one way to resolve this…

No one said a word as the recording finished. Parker sat down next to Callen and said nothing, just laid her head on his shoulder.

His mind whirred with the implications.

"Callen, what were you able to find out from Marie?" Nate asked, trying to gauge Callen's reaction.

Clearing his throat, Callen answered, "Not much more than this. Victor is the problem. I have no idea where to find him… Look, I promised you I would find Eliot and bring him back to you. I will do that…"

"How exactly are we going to accomplish that?" Nate asked.

"WE… aren't. I said I would. You need to stay out of it. Let me handle this." Callen replied as he pulled himself to his feet before offering his hand to Parker in order to help her up.

"Callen…"

"Look Nate, I appreciate all you are trying to do. Truth is… I don't know what I'm going to find when I do manage to get to Eliot. I don't want to have to tell him that any of you were hurt because of me, so please… just this once, listen. Eliot will need you… Eric, keep me up on what is going on here and if you hear anything from the OSP."

"Sure. Where are you going now?" Eric asked, hoping for more than what he expected to get and disappointed when Callen simply said, "to find Eliot."

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

For hours he simply walked the water's edge, thinking. Thinking of how his life had come to this. He thought about his childhood as far back as he could remember. Try as he might, anything before the nightmarish foster homes was nothing more than snippets of times he now wondered if they were even real or were they just fabrications of a desperate mind?

He skimmed over his youth and all the abusive homes… the frequent trips to the hospitals and the way too many times he should have been taken there but wasn't, for fear they would lose the rights to foster and the checks that came with it.

His time in the military was the least painful… until 'The Agency' stepped in and took over. Truth be told, his entire existence had been controlled by one government entity or another and always for his own good.

Exhausted, he plopped down onto the sand… he needed to get his head on straight. Decisions needed to be made.

His thoughts were disrupted by the buzz of his phone. Eric had intercepted a message from Blackguard. There was no question any longer: His father's disappearance from his life, his mother's murder, his sister's murder, Joelle's death, the shooting incidences with Kensi and Deeks and again with Sam's house were all planned… all because of him.

Callen dialed the number for Blackguard.

"It's about time, Agent Callen. You are a hard man to get a hold of…" Victor greeted.

"Yeah, well you obviously can't take a hint." Callen retorted.

"You knew going in there was really only one way out..." Victor responded.

"What is it you want from me, Victor? Where's Eliot?"

"What I want, Agent Callen, is for you to stop fighting me. It's time to come back… back to the only place where you are appreciated for your talents. Where you aren't held back by rules and regulations." Victor stated.

"And you think that's a good thing." It wasn't a question so much as an observation. Callen began to pace. The anger and resentment… the hate he felt for this man… it was nearly overwhelming.

"Of course, it's a good thing. This country… our government has become complacent. The enemy gets closer every day. They are untouchable in most cases. They slip into this country under the radar, do their business and are gone before we are able to do anything about it because our hands are tied by regulations and red tape. We are not… we are this country's best line of defense." Victor was adamant.

"There is a reason for the red tape. No one needs that kind of power. It goes to the head. People start believing they can do whatever they want." Callen seethed inside, "Such as kill other agents who have done nothing to deserve such a fate!"

Victor chuckled, "Is this about Marie? Agent Callen, do not let her death weaken your resolve. She was the weak one. She wanted to caudle you. Just as she did our children. They are useless to me… to this country. But you! You are the perfect soldier. Despite your obvious soft side, you know I'm right. Even as you ran back to your beloved NCIS you returned to Blackguard to do what you knew needed done when NCIS had tied your hands."

He couldn't argue, he had. "Fair enough… but I only did what needed done for the safety of everyone. What about those two agents you sent me to kill? You lied to me Victor. You never told me they were agents."

"Are you certain? It seemed pretty personal to me. As I recall, you threatened both Leon and myself in order to save Miss Kamran Hanna… with no concern for the other agents involved. Interesting, don't you think… how some agents are more important than others. As for those two agents, they had gone rogue. They chose their own demise, not me. They turned on their country. I did not lie to you… they were no longer agents of this country… they were enemies." Victor goaded.

"Pardon me if I don't believe you. As for Kamran, you leave her out of this…"

"Oh, I don't think I can do that. She is quite the natural, don't you think? Perhaps that's why you have developed such a connection with the girl. PERHAPS, that is why Agent Hanna charged you with keeping an eye on her children instead of her straight-laced husband. She knew you would understand her abilities and foster them."

The need to reach through the phone and strangle the man was at a fever pitch. Through clinched teeth he answered, "Michelle Hanna would never have wished this life on her kids. Which is why you are going to take them off that list of yours."

"Oh, really… and why, pray tell, would I want to do that?" Victors voice grew deep and menacing.

"Because, if you think for one minute that I would allow you to do to those kids, what you have done to me… you are crazy." His voice became equally threatening.

"And what do I get in return, should I allow you your pets?" he asked.

"Me. You leave Eliot and his team alone. You take those kids off your list and any kids now or future which are connected with the members of the OSP for that matter… My team is off limits." Callen demanded in return.

"YOUR team, are they? I thought they weren't YOUR team. Interesting. I notice you haven't mentioned your own family… of course, I can see why. Your own father has repeatedly turned his back on you… much the way your precious team has. I fail to see why you feel so beholding to them. Though, they do throw you the occasional bone… and like any starving mutt, you offer your loyalty in return, regardless of the fact they will likely kick you in the gut when they are no longer in need of you." Victor taunted.

"Are you purposely trying to piss me off?" Callen spat.

Victor simply laughed, "You are a treasure… very well, I will leave your precious teams alone. However, I reserve the right to change my mind if you so much as hint at reneging on our deal. Now, who shall break the news to Mr. Spencer?"

"Seeing as he has been in your clutches for nearly two weeks now, I will let you have the pleasure," Callen responded hotly.

"I do so regret to inform you that Mr. Spencer is not in my company at the present time."

"What are you saying?" Callen's stomach churned at the thoughts going through his head.

"Come now, Agent Callen. Mr. Spencer does not have the stomach for such work… which is why you helped him run the first time. You think I didn't know? Unfortunately, I was not in charge the first time around and they allowed you both your freedom. We still had other mice in the game. However, your dear Henrietta Lange and her cronies couldn't keep their noses out of things and our project was eventually brought to a halt… if, only briefly."

"Hetty"

"Oh, that's right… she does love her secrets, even to her own detriment. Once a spy…" Victor teased, "Okay, I grow bored with this game. Mr. Spencer needed to learn there are consequences for his insubordination. However, you come back to work and I will see about having your friend returned to the fold as well. He is of no consequence to me. Fair enough? But understand this, G Callen. Any further fraternization with Hetty and HER team… and all bets are off. Those brats are no longer your concern. Say your good-byes, I will be in touch."

"Fine" Callen disconnected the call. His blood boiled. There was no telling what he had done with Spencer. However, it was clear that Victor believed Marie to be dead. He would have to see to it that Eric got her safely out of the country under a new identity until he could find a way to bring Victor down. Now he needed to cut his ties with the only people who ever truly fought for him… a knowledge that came a little too late. Hetty and her penchant for keeping secrets! The team… they tried… despite everything, they tried to make amends and now he needed to burn what little was left of that bridge and in doing so, he prayed Michelle could forgive him for breaking his promise as he could no longer be there to watch over her family.

He had little time left to himself. He needed to ensure they would move on and give up this false notion that he was worth saving. He had spent a lifetime being a disappointment to everyone around him. He could only cherish the brief time he spent with OSP when they all allowed themselves to remain blissfully ignorant to the obvious. He couldn't be saved.


	35. Chapter 35

**DISCLAIMER** **: None of the characters of NCIS LA/ NCIS/ Leverage belong to me. However, the creation of this storyline and the characters Marie and Victor are all mine.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi everyone. I won't keep you but to say thank you once again for the reviews and messages. I do hope you are liking this new story. I know it had a slow start and to be fair, all stories are so much easier to read when you can read them "cover to cover" without waiting for the next chapter to show up… I just hope you are staying with us as we move forward. It will be worth it. Well, in my opinion. HA and I have another story in the works, following this one… so… I'm going to go work on that before I fall asleep for the night and you have at reading this next installment. Let me know your thoughts when you finish! I really love reading them.**

Once he decided on a place to bunk down in for the night, he got busy on the task now at hand. He needed to resign NCIS for the last time. The first letter would be to Leon which would lead him to releasing Jethro from his time in LA so that he could go back to his own home and team. Next, he would need to let the team know, as well as, Hetty. They needed to be separate letters. The team needed to hate him enough to not follow. It was the only way to keep the kids safe. To keep his team safe. He knew Kensi and Deeks would one day want kids… hell, even Eric and Nell… He needed to know they would be safely out of the reach of Victor. Hetty had been a player of the game for many more years than he… she would see through the letter to the team and he needed her to help him do what needed done… She needed to stay true to them and keep them safe. Lastly, there were the kids. He would need to give them closure and in doing so, he was pretty sure it would destroy what was left of his heart.

When he once again began working for Victor, which he had no doubt would chip away at any remaining pieces of his soul, there would be nothing left but a shell. Finally, he would be able to simply wait for that elusive bullet which would allow him to escape this miserable world. He was exhausted… mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually… exhausted. He had fought for so long to have what was never meant to be his. He remembered Walton Flinn… how he had once said they did what they did so everyone else could have that life. The white picket fence and family… playing ball in the yard with your kid. That was for everyone else. Maybe Victor was right. Someone had to do the job… might as well be him.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

The next morning, he made a call to Aiden to set a time when he could stop by and see them both. The plan was to wait until Sam had left for work.

Callen was easily able to avoid the agents put to watching over the kids when the others were not there. He found it disturbing and couldn't help but hear Victor's voice in his head about how unprepared the agents of today were. It was something to think about. He could feel the darkness within… the very darkness he worked so incredibly hard to keep boxed up in the deepest recesses of his mind… begin to seep ever closer to the surface.

"Aiden." Callen greeted as he entered the house through the garage.

"Uncle G" Aiden offered his hand, "How are you?"

"I'm doing well… you?"

"Bored. There is nothing to do. We are missing all kinds of stuff at school. I don't understand why we can't go back!" Aiden whined.

Callen walked through the house looking at what remained of the bullet holes from the early morning drive by… "Well, these bullet holes would be one reason you are still here."

"Nothing else has happened… it's crazy."

"Uncle Callen!" Kamran cried as she came running down the hall.

"Hey Banana Hanna!" Callen returned with a smile.

"When did you get here?" she asked excitedly.

"Just a few minutes ago. How are you doing, Kam?"

"I'm okay. I wish I could go back to school, though. Dad won't let us do anything. Is this because of what I told you when you came to visit?" Kamran asked shyly.

"What? No… no, this isn't about you, exactly. It's me. I'm the reason you are here." Callen stated calmly.

"You? Why? Why would our house get shot up because of you, Uncle G?" Aiden's brow raised in question.

"I can't really get into it, but suffice it to say, I told your father to keep you here." Callen explained.

"I don't understand, is this about the man who kidnapped Kamran?" Aiden asked stepping closer to his sister.

"No, not this time. Look, I've got to go away…"

Kamran didn't let him finish, "No, Uncle Callen. You can't leave. What if something bad happens?"

"Kamran, I have to do this. I don't want…"

Again, she interrupted him, "You promised we'd go shell hunting! You promised!"

Callen hated the pain he saw in her eyes, "I know and I shouldn't have promised something I wasn't sure I could keep. I have no control over this… I have to go."

"No, you don't. You don't HAVE to go… you want to. If you really wanted to be here with us then you would find a way! Well, I don't need you anymore. I don't need you to protect me, I have Kensi. She's teaching me all kinds of stuff. Daddy and Deeks are teaching Aiden how to fight. So, you can go if you want to and you don't have to come back! I… I hate you, G Callen!" Kamran screamed angrily.

Aiden watched her run from the room before he turned to face Callen, "You know, Uncle Callen, everyone else has gotten used to you leaving and coming back again… but Kamran is different. She cries every time you disappear. Maybe it would be best if you just stopped visiting until you know whether you are going to stay next time or not. Next to losing mom… you are the only one I've ever seen her cry that hard over… It's not right, Uncle Callen."

Callen looked at the young man standing before him. "You're right… I've caused everyone enough pain. I meant what I said, Aiden. I can't stay. This has to be handled. You and Kamran are in danger. You have grown into a fine young man your mother would be proud of. You are so much like your father. Take care of yourself and watch out for her… I need you to stay here until it's safe."

"I will… we will." He replied through the lump in his throat. He looked at the man in front of him, realizing that this was likely the last time he would see him. His heart broke for his sister. He knew she would regret the harsh words she had just spoken and would not be able to take back…

"Good… that's good." Callen nodded before pulling his phone from his pocket as it hummed to life. Reading the message, he let out a heavy sigh, "Time to go. Remember what I said." He thought a moment before continuing sincerely, "Do me a favor… when she gets past the point of anger, tell her I'm sorry." Callen spoke softly, a near whisper.

"I will, Uncle Callen. Be careful." Aiden stated.

Callen nodded and headed back out via the garage. As he climbed back into his car, he cast one last look at Sam's house before driving away for what he felt in his heart was the last time.


	36. Chapter 36

**DISCLAIMER** **: None of the NCIS LA/ NCIS/ Leverage characters. Just remember that the story and Victor and Marie are alllllllll mine.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi. It's late… been writing… ok, so I'm going to get right to it… Here's the next chapter. It's short and sweet... sorry. Please, when you are done reading, take the time to leave a review and share your thoughts with me.**

More than a month had passed since he'd left to begin working once more for Blackguard. His only concern was getting Eliot back to his team as he had promised Parker. It wouldn't be easy and it would take time. His first task was to get him back from wherever Victor had sent him. The man had stayed true to their bargain and within the second week he'd shown up. One look and Callen had suspicions as to who he had been with. Try though he might, Eliot refused to speak of it. Callen tended to his injuries without further questioning.

It was another two weeks before Eliot recovered enough to finally address the situation they found themselves in.

"So, you gave in and sold what was left of your soul?" Eliot growled through the pain.

"What are you talking about." Callen responded as he finished up redressing yet another of his many wounds.

"You gave up on everyone who has ever cared anything about you and went back to work for Blackguard." Eliot threw back.

"Not that simple and you know it. Your team wants you back. Sam's kids are on that infernal list now which puts not just them but Sam in danger. The entire team was on a hit list because I refused to come back… What if Deeks and Kensi decide to have kids one day… if this list is still around… I can't take a chance on anyone else being at risk."

Eliot turned around and looked at his friend. He saw the look of despair flash in his eyes. "I knew you cared about them. Why didn't you simply tell them?"

"Because… they have been through enough on account of me. Doesn't matter what I think or what I feel… Simply put, they are better off without me. Victor threatened everyone we care about… the only way to appease the lunatic was to agree to come back."

"Let me get this straight… you agreed to my return without even asking me?" Eliot roared.

"So, you would risk the safety of your entire team?" Callen challenged calmly.

Eliot looked at his friend with fire in his eyes before finally allowing his scowl to slip into a familiar smirk, "So what is your plan… I would assume you have one."

Callen laid the last of the medical supplies back in the box and walked to the window. "Honestly, Eliot? No. I do not have a plan. I'm done. Victor is right about some things… I will simply make sure I check everything he sends for me."

"You're justifying this idiot?" Eliot stated angrily.

"Justifying? Can you argue the fact that we have way too many bad guys getting away unpunished? They just come back stronger, with more back up… The ABC agencies have no power in most of these cases. Blackguard serves its purpose."

"Serves its… are you insane? What happened to 'no one should have that much power'?" Eliot shouted.

Callen slammed his hands down on the table and glared across the room at his friend, "What do you want from me? I'm not fit for anything else. All I do is cause trouble wherever I go. People around me die. At least this way, they are all safe."

"All but you… me." Eliot grumbled to himself.

"What's that?" Callen asked.

Eliot cast a glance in his direction, "nothing. Look, Callen, I get why you have chosen to do what you are doing, but this just seems wrong… You originally walked away from your team because you felt they had lied, turned their backs on you… What about Victor? The man saved your life simply to use you! Why have you agreed to work for him? Why aren't we taking this guy down? Why aren't we taking the power away from the guy. You know you have what you need to shut this group down… Why aren't we making plans to do just that! At least then you could go back." His voice rose with each word.

Callen looked at him and said nothing at first. His heart was broken… there was no going back. He had burned his bridges back to NCIS… to Sam's family… to Hetty. He had trusted the wrong people and this would be the consequence for that mistake. "Go back to your team, Eliot. I WILL deal with Victor… in time. This is not your battle. I have nothing to go back to, but you do… If I can reach Victor then maybe Blackguard can be what it was meant to be," he stated softly.

"Callen"

"Go home, Eliot. I promised Parker. Don't make me break a promise. I've done enough of that," Callen stated more adamantly, "In fact, do me a favor. Could you send this to Kamran? I broke a promise to her… maybe this will make it up to her just a little."

"Callen, no…" Eliot argued, "I'm not leaving you with that bastard… You have to know he sees you as a liability! I leave and he will be all over you. I know damn well you aren't in this to just be his whipping boy. He will catch on to whatever game you are playing and when he does… Iosif will be waiting! You KNOW THAT… wait, you know that… That's the end game for you, isn't it? You aren't after Victor, you're after Iosif. You have what you need to shut down Victor already… but not Iosif. Callen, that guy is evil. You can't take him on alone. He nearly killed you not once but twice! He's in your head. You need my help."

"You aren't who he wants. You have served your purpose. You are free to go. Callen picked up his stuff and headed for the door as Eliot stepped in front of him, "Don't. Don't do this."

He just smiled and put his hand out and waited, "You're a good friend, Eliot. I'm glad you found your place. Just do me a favor, don't forget to get that package to Kamran for me, Okay?"

Reluctantly, Eliot grabbed his friend's hand and shook it and with a nod of his head he let go and watched Callen walk away.

"This isn't over, Callen. It doesn't end this way." Eliot whispered to himself, "That team of yours is going to get their act together…"


	37. Chapter 37

**DISCLAIMER** **: Hello there… just a small reminder, letting you know that I do not own any of the characters belonging to NCIS LA/NCIS/Leverage. I DO, however, own all rights to Marie, Victor, and Iosif… as well as this story line. Just so you know. HA**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, here we are… Eliot is heading back "home"… and Callen is heading into the deep abyss that is… "Blackguard". Will he survive this round? Will the team and Hetty look for the deeper reasoning behind his decision? Will Eliot step up and get the ducks in a row? I reckon we are about to find out… Please drop me a line and let me know what you think is going to happen next… I loved hearing from everyone today regarding this last chapter. Y'all are GREAT! Thank you!**

Gathering his things, he headed back through the streets of LA toward the last place he had seen his team. It was late when he finally opened the door to his unsuspecting friends.

"Eliot!" Parker yelled, running up to him and stopping short at the sight of all the bruises.

"Eliot, what happened to you?" Nate asked, equally shocked.

"Nothing worth talking about." Eliot grumbled while allowing Sophie to lead him to the couch to sit down.

"We've been looking for you everywhere! Where have you been all this time?" Hardison asked, plopping down on the coffee table across from him.

"I don't know. I headed out for a walk and to get food that night and the next thing I knew I was in the back of a van…. After that, it was a blur. Finally, I was released to meet up with Callen. Turns out he made a deal with the devil."

"Deal with the… so Callen… found you?" Nate asked.

"Yes, and he gave himself up for my release… among others" Eliot yawned, "I need to get ahold of Hetty and that team of hers." He began to pull himself to his feet when Sophie gently pressed him back into the couch, "Hardison, have you heard from Eric? Has anyone talked to Hetty?"

"I have spoken with Eric a few times. Callen brushed him off and sent him packing back to the OSP. He was pretty upset. Last I talked to him he said no one was talking. Guess Callen gave them the same treatment. He suspects Hetty is looking into it because she has been making herself scarce around there… but she hasn't even asked him what he knows. I've been doing everything I can to find something on him… no luck."

Sophie shushed him quietly, "Tomorrow will come soon enough. Tonight, you rest." she stated calmly. Relieved that he didn't argue, she took the blanket off the back of the couch and laid it over him. "I don't know where he has been but Nate, whomever he was with was very cruel," she stated as they walked into the other room.

"They certainly did a number on him. I would hate to think what other injuries he's hiding." Nate concurred.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

The next morning Eliot stood at the window debating his next move. Callen was adamant he wanted no more interference from anyone in LA, but Eliot was not one to cater to crazy. The night had been a long one and he couldn't help the shiver that ran down his spine as he remembered the nightmares that not all that long ago had been his reality and if he gave up and did nothing, they would be his friends reality to the point of an agonizing death.

"Good morning, Eliot," Nate greeted as he came up to stand at his side, sharing the view from the window.

"Nate", he replied.

"Did you get ANY sleep?"

He had hoped he hadn't awakened anyone else with his dreams but it was quickly becoming apparent that was not to be the case. "I got enough."

"Eliot… the bruises…"

"Don't, Nate. I won't answer your questions so don't bother asking. Look, I have to go somewhere." Eliot began.

"Where?" Nate asked.

"I need to go to the OSP" Eliot answered.

"Why? You should be resting. You need to heal." Sophie stated, walking up behind them.

"I made a promise to Callen. I need to follow through. Also, I need to talk to this team of his."

"Are you sure you are up to that?" Nate asked.

"This isn't the first time I've gotten in a fight. Why all the concern? I do this stuff for a living, remember?" Eliot grumbled.

"Fine, however, if you are heading over to see this Hetty Lange, I think it's as good a time as any for Sophie and I to meet her." Nate replied.

"Why?" Eliot looked at him skeptically.

"Seems to me this Hetty is the main reason we are all here. I would like to meet her. Do you have a problem with that?"

Eliot eyed him for a moment before shaking his head, "Nope. I'm going to take a shower… be ready to go when I'm done."

"Okay."

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Hetty sat at her desk looking at the letter in front of her. She had read it over and over a hundred times or more since it arrived at the OSP nearly a month ago now. She didn't know what to make of it:

Hetty,

My time is short. Though I have no clue who began the original Blackguard, as I only ever dealt with his cronies back then… I do know who resurrected it.

There are things at play that requires you and the team to move forward from here. To that end, I have sent a letter to the team informing them of my final resignation from NCIS. They need closure. If it causes them to hate me, then so be it. I can live with that, if it means they are all safe. Tell Sam the kids are safe to return for their final month of school. There will be no more trouble. You just make sure they keep training those kids.

You and I have been in this business for a long time… maybe too long. We frequently have to do things that go against our grain as a decent human being. This team has never been faced with the true realities of this business. I pray they never do. They should never know the pain of the decisions you and I have had to make over the years.

At some point a package will be sent to you… you will know what to do when it comes.

You and I once discussed how this team works. You told me that we "shoot the ducks and you just row the boat" and I told you then, you row pretty good….

I know, Hetty… I know. You rowed pretty good.

G Callen

He knew now that she was not the evil one he had originally thought her to be, but he also knew who was… which was one step ahead of the rest of them. It was obvious he was attempting to protect them from finding out. What confused her was the package she was to expect. What was in that package? He said she would know what to do when she opened it… but as yet, nothing had come. In the meantime, the team had indeed received his letter in the manner he expected them to. They were heartbroken and angry. If his intent was to cut all ties with his past, he had succeeded… and it broke her heart because they didn't know the truth and she couldn't tell them. Once more she was keeping secrets that ate at her conscience. The letter he had sent to Sam but was addressed to the entire team was one of cruel condemnation for the lack of trust in him which led him to decide the only way forward was to leave them behind. It was only half true on his part.

She had shared this with Leon but left it up to him to talk to Gibbs. Between the three of them, they knew the perils of the path Callen had chosen. They just didn't have what they needed to find him, to figure out the who behind the what. Though she continued to dig there was little else the rest of them could do. They boy they were all once charged with protecting was now out there somewhere putting his own life on the line to protect others. Where the team was concerned there was nothing left to do but move forward. Sadly, she put the letter back in her desk drawer with her many Aliases Id's and locked it. Taking a deep breath, she pulled in her emotions, the team would never know just how much her heart ached for the boy she loved as a son.

She had noticed the change in Eric as he returned home from his time away with Callen. It was obvious that he was hurt by Callen's retreat into the dark world of Blackguard… but she also felt he knew more than he was willing to share with the rest of them. She was quite proud of the young man. He had learned much from his mentor and for that she was grateful. His friendship with Nell was slowly repairing itself and she felt assured they would soon find their new normal. She had tried to find a temporary agent to fill in as the fourth member of the team but they weren't having it. Within a day or two the agent would ask for a transfer. In her heart, she knew they were still waiting and hoping… They were not as innocent as Callen had hoped. Eric was not the only one to have learned from him in his time there.

Hetty wanted nothing more than to figure out where he was and go to him, try to talk some sense into him. She wanted to get her hands on whoever or whatever had caused this retreat but she also knew that while she could demand the information from Eric… Callen trusted him with this information and she didn't want to risk the thin connection they may still have with Callen through Eric. She also believed that if Eric had any idea that Callen was truly in danger, he would have said something to her. However, she wasn't sitting back doing nothing. She had feelers out with everyone who was anyone with information regarding Callen's past… He would primarily be outside the country and finding him would be next to impossible. She would need to be patient… she needed that package.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Eliot stood, staring in the mirror. The bruises had faded little. The cuts had all but healed and there was little to no scarring on his face, though there was a fine line that traversed his neck to his chest that would, no doubt, remain, though perhaps lighten with time. It was no wonder they had shown such great concern for his well-being. He had taken more than a few hits during his time with Leverage but never quite this bad. Iosif had a talent… it was a talent that would eventually cost him his life if Eliot had anything to do with it. Knowing what he had done to Callen not once but twice… he had gotten off easy by comparison. He was just glad they were unable to see the rest of the bruises and numerous scars he had collected in his time with Iosif Romanoff.

Quickly pulling his T-shirt over his head he grabbed his jacket and backpack and headed for the door. The team was waiting for him when he came back out to the living room. "Will you stop staring at me like I'm going to disappear again? I'm fine. Now, let's get going."

"Shouldn't we call them first? They weren't overly welcoming the last time we showed up there unannounced and Callen isn't going to be there to stop them from shooting us." Hardison stated nervously.

"Ah, we'll be fine. Eric is there and Sparky here will keep us safe." Parker grinned at the scowl that creeped across Eliot's face. She knew exactly what was coming next and it reassured her that their friend was truly back and was going to be okay.

"Parker! Seriously?" Eliot growled as he walked out the door, followed by the expected, "There is something wrong with you."

Sophie smiled at Parker as she bounced through the door. She understood exactly what prompted her and was glad to see her smiling again. The wait had been a long one. Callen had left saying he would bring him back. After a few weeks they were beginning to worry that maybe something had happened and neither would be coming back. One day, Eric received word that he should return to the OSP as his services were no longer needed. Dejectedly, he said his goodbyes and headed back to his old job while they continued to wait for word on their friend.

The only question remaining now was, what happened to Callen. Why did Eliot return alone? It was clear that he was not in the mood to rehash the past few weeks or more. She hoped the wounds he dealt with would heal… and not just the physical ones but the ones that now plagued his sleep.


	38. Chapter 38

**DISCLAIMER** **: No characters from NCIS LA/ NCIS/ Leverage belong to me. Victor, Marie, and Iosif, however, are all of my own creation. Any and all similarities to people living or otherwise is purely coincidental.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Good evening. I am presently wondering what in the world happened to the snowstorm we were to receive today. It has been quite the disappointment. Perhaps everyone else is getting one because I didn't hear back from many today. No doubt, everyone is busy. Well, for those who reviewed, I thank you kindly. Here is the next chapter. A little step forward, if you will. Please drop in with a brief review once you have finished reading, if you would please.**

Hetty's attention was quickly drawn to the fast-moving figure flip flopping his way down the steps from the Ops center. She stood up in question when he didn't come towards her as she had expected but instead headed for the entrance. Moments later she had some of her questions answered as he came down the hallway toward her with Eliot and his entire team in tow.

"Mr. Spencer." Hetty greeted as she met them half way in the courtyard.

"Miss Lange." He replied.

"Shall we find a place to sit? You look as though you could use a chair." She offered with a small but calculated smile.

"I'm fine, but if YOU need to sit…" he retorted, eyeing her carefully.

"No, no, I am fine. What, pray tell, brings you once more to our doorstep?" she asked.

"I would think that was obvious."

"Ah, well, my guess then would be Mr. Callen. However, I must inform you that Mr. Callen no longer works for NCIS. He resigned more than a month ago, now." Hetty stated calmly, "I'm sorry to inform you that we have no idea of his whereabouts at the present time."

"We going to play this game? You and I both know damn well where Callen is. You also know why… so how about we cut to the chase. Where is his team and why the hell aren't you doing something to get him back?" Eliot growled angrily.

"Mr. Callen made it abundantly clear what my position was to be in this event." Hetty explained with her brows raised as she moved her sights onto Nate and Sophie, "I have had the pleasure of being introduced to Mr. Hardison and Miss Parker previously, however, I have not had the opportunity to get to know you, Mr. Nathan Ford, is it? And you are, Sophie Devereaux… recently married to Mr. Ford here, congratulations." Hetty shook each of their hands a knowing smile on her face.

"I see you have done your homework." Nate remarked solemnly.

"Due diligence, Mr. Ford."

"Enough with the niceties." Eliot grumbled, "Where's this team of yours?"

Hetty thought about the team and couldn't help but let her mind wandered back to the day the letters arrived that changed everything. She knew how hers chilled and gutted her heart but as she watched from her desk as the team read theirs, crushed whatever was left.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === 1 MONTH EARLIER === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Sam,

This letter is to inform you and the rest of the team that I have made the decision to move onto other endeavors. It has become painstakingly clear that we are fighting a losing battle trying to put this team back together. We can not go back in time to where we were before this all started. I will accept my part in the demise of this partnership… however, it is not I that started this mess in its entirety. That falls squarely on your shoulders. You knew back when we first met, Sam, that this was a long shot and if you had had your way, we would never have even been a team. Consider yourself lucky. Now you can find yourself a real partner. Kensi, I meant what I said when I told them that you were an excellent agent. The only thing you need to remember, Deeks as well, is that you can't bring your emotions into the office. No one is safe when you do. Deeks, I am sorry if you feel I left you behind to die during that mission. It was so long ago now, yet seems to be the anchor in all this mess. I did what I felt I needed to do for you as well as the mission. That said, the residual anger from that mission has settled within the structure of this unit and I can no longer pretend that I will be able to regain the trust of this team. I think it's time for someone to just call it for what it is… a failure. Sam, find yourself a partner you can trust and lead this team the way you think it should be led. I have officially given my resignation to Director Leon Vance along with Henrietta Lange. If I could offer one piece of advice, should it mean anything to you, keep training your kids, Sam. Don't ever leave them vulnerable.

G Callen

No one said anything for a few moments before Sam wadded the letter into a ball and threw it across the courtyard in a fury like no one had seen before. They had watched Sam fall into despair when Michelle died but no one ever angered and frustrated him quite the way G Callen could. Deeks watched as the anger mixed with sorrow at the loss of his best friend and brother. Knowing that once more his kids were going to feel the familiar sting of abandonment. "Damn him!"

"Sam" Kensi reached a hand out to touch his arm but he pulled away from her.

"No, you know what?" Sam said shaking his head, "It's fine."

"It's not fine, Sam" Deeks stated with concern. Where'd he go? Is he with another agency? Did he go back to Blackguard?"

"Oh No, you don't think…" Kensi started when Sam interrupted,

"Deeks, Kensi, It's fine. He never wanted to be here. Not since the first time I met the man. He never trusted anyone… not even us. He wants to go… Let him go! I'm tired of worrying about him! If he is stupid enough to go back to Blackguard then so be it! Maybe he's better suited to that kind of work."

"Sam, you don't mean that! You know what would happen if he went back there. You saw what it did to him! That is NOT what Callen should be doing." Deeks reasoned.

"I do mean it, Marty! He has repeatedly hurt my kids with his popping in and out of our lives. I'm done! I'm DONE!" Sam growled.

"He has also repeatedly SAVED your family's lives." Kensi argued.

Sam turned his sight to the ceiling, with a heavy sigh he looked down as he walked away, "except my wife… he couldn't save my wife." He mumbled just loud enough for his two teammates to hear.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === PRESENT TIME === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Bringing her thoughts back to the present she tilted her head slightly as she answered the group in front of her. "They are working on a mission at present. They will be back later today… sooner if they are able to wrap a few things up. I do not think it wise for you to meet with them while you are in this frame of mind, Mr. Spencer. Our friend, I'm afraid, left them with a rather bitter taste in their mouths. They may not be so inclined to hear what you have to say." Hetty offered.

"I don't give a rat's…"

"I'm sure you don't" Hetty chuckled, interrupting him. She could see so much of Callen in his behavior. It was no wonder they were good friends. "However, might I suggest you retire to the cottage where Mr. Callen had been staying and get yourself something to eat and some rest. We will meet you there later this evening and we will talk then."

Eliot thought for a moment, "Fine."

"Good, good. Let me get you the key and you can be on your way. Mr. Beale, would you care to accompany them?" she asked, looking over the top of her glasses.

"Uh, sure! I will go get my stuff." Eric said as he ran up the stairs to the Ops center.

Hetty closed her eyes to the sound of his flip flops hitting the stairs. She opened them to Eliot shaking his head, "You really know how to pick them, don't you?"

"Yes, Mr. Spencer, I would have to agree with you. The creation of this team was quite the coup. They are a squirrely bunch at times but they make an unbeatable team." She agreed.

"Maybe once upon a time. You are, however, missing your lead agent at present." Eliot reminded her.

"Yes, we most definitely are. So off with you. The house is stocked with everything you might need. Feel free to move your things there if you would like… you are less obvious there. Should I have a doctor stop by to check on you, Mr. Spencer?" Hetty asked, already knowing the answer.

"I don't need a doctor." Eliot replied as Nate chuckled and Sophie rolled her eyes.

"mmmhmmm, Well then, off with you. We will see you this evening. Shall I bring dinner?"

"No, I will take care of it." Eliot stated. He hadn't been in the kitchen since before Iosif and cooking always calmed his spirit and right now… right now, he needed calming."

"Very well." Hetty replied as she handed the keys over to Eliot. Eric joined them as they turned to leave.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Callen stood on the balcony of his hotel room contemplating his latest job. He had little to no contact with Victor, which was fine by him… he knew he was watched. Victor's people hadn't been especially careful about not being seen. He had pushed the boundaries a few times by cornering them and scaring them into leaving him alone for a while. But Victor was always quick to remind him that Callen was not the only one being watched.

Tonight, he found himself reminiscing. The kids would be out of school now. The team had probably chosen their replacement for him. He hoped he wouldn't have to overlap any cases with them this time around. No doubt Gibbs was beyond pissed with him. He had already pushed him to the limits by the end.

With a sigh he headed back into his room. He was paid well for the work he did and so far, everything Victor had given him had checked out. Still, at the end of the day and when he had breaks between jobs, he found himself missing something and spending way too many hours on regrets he could do nothing about.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Earlier in the day Nate and Hardison had gone and gathered everyone's belongings and moved them back to the beach house. Eliot allowed himself a few minutes to try and rest but every time he closed his eyes, he was revisited by the past several weeks… fear for his friend weighed heavy in the pit of his stomach. Finally, he wandered into the gourmet kitchen and began rummaging through the cabinets and refrigerator until he decided what he would fix for the evening meal…

He appreciated Hetty's choice in quality foods. He had noticed that even while Callen was living there, she had made sure to stock it with as much healthy food as his friend would allow. Callen wasn't against eating healthy, despite the way Sam would tease him. He just didn't cook… simple as that. That and he enjoyed how it irked his partner to bring in the containers loaded down with bacon. He chuckled as he worked on putting the food out to serve.

"Find something amusing?" Sophie asked quietly as she entered the kitchen.

Eliot looked up, his face sober, "Memories."

"Memories of?"

"They should be here soon." Eliot deflected.

"Well, everything looks divine… if anyone leaves hungry, it is their own fault." Sophie took a carrot from the crudités platter and dipped it in the homemade dill sauce.

"mm" Eliot replied, once again lost in thought.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

That night Eliot watched as two cars pulled up to the beach house, "They're here."

"Yeah, Sam does NOT look happy," Eric said, watching through the window.

"I don't really care what Sam is feeling at this point," Eliot growled.

"Eliot, his kids are here. You need to reign in that anger of yours." Nate warned, "We don't know how much those kids know."

Eliot glanced back at Nate and with a nod he turned and headed to the back of the house, "I'm going to go plate up the toppings for the fish tacos. Bring them back to the kitchen when they make it to the door." Stepping away from the group allowed him the opportunity to breathe and reset. He realized that Callen had purposely gone out of his way to cut ties with the team and he was apparently brutal in his approach to assure they would leave him go. He just had to believe that whatever they felt for Callen was still there. He couldn't do this alone. He NEEDED their help and it pissed him off to admit it.


	39. Chapter 39

**DISCLAIMER** **: I don't own these characters… well, I don't own the characters from NCIS LA / NCIS / Leverage. I do, however, own the characters of Marie, Victor, and Iosif. I also own the rights to this story… if that matters.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hello! THANKS to everyone who has been reviewing and messaging me their thoughts on this story. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading them all. I have tried replying to everyone who writes but if for some crazy reason I missed you. Please know that I am sorry and that your message was every bit as important as the others. I listen to each one and look for ideas in them… some for this story and some for future stories coming up. Thank you. Okay, looking forward here. I know you will not be happy at the end of this chapter… sorry. It's just how it fell… but at least you know that tomorrow will bring the next chapter and with it yet one more step forward in finding out what Callen is up to and how the teams will come together to bring our boy home! Chapter THIRTY-NINE! Can you believe it? It's flying by so fast… but there is much more to come before we say fini! Okay, off you go… but remember to send a review when you finish… please and thank you (…are the magic words) sorry.**

"Sam, before we go in there, you need to get a hold of yourself. We don't know what exactly Mr. Spencer and his team are here for. Let's wait and find out before you lose control." Hetty warned.

"Hetty, I'm fine. I just don't see what we need to be here for." He grumbled as he looked back to see where the kids had gone. Seeing them with Deeks and Kensi, he turned back and let out a sigh, "Hetty, these kids have been through so much and they just don't need any more surprises from G Callen and his cronies."

Hetty couldn't stop herself from bristling at the tone Sam used when he mentioned his former partner's name. "Be that as it may, Mr. Hanna, we need to see what it is that Mr. Spencer has to say."

"Fine."

The walk to the door was followed in silence. It was Nate who was there to greet them.

"Mr. Ford." Hetty greeted as she entered first, followed by Kensi and Kamran and then Deeks, Aiden with Sam following at the back looking every bit as angry as he felt. "I must say, it smells divine in here."

"That would be Eliot. He is in the kitchen putting the final touches on dinner. He said to come on back as soon as you came in, so if you are ready…" Sophie offered.

"This is your show," Sam replied in a rumble that made Hetty turn back with yet another look of warning.

They walked in and found the table covered in fish tacos with all the fixings as well as other side dishes. "Sit, it's getting cold." Eliot mumbled as he found his own spot where he could keep an eye on all of their visitors. The cold look that passed between Sam and Eliot wasn't missed by anyone. They sat in near silence as they ate. Parker and Hardison gladly excused themselves momentarily in order to clean everything from the table, once they were finished eating.

"Dinner was excellent." Deeks complimented honestly.

Eliot glanced in his direction and acknowledged his compliment with a simple, "Thank you."

"Now, Mr. Spencer, might we ask why you wanted to speak with us?"

"Not quite yet. We are expecting a few more visitors. They should be here soon." Eliot answered with a smirk.

"Other visitors? Who?" Sam demanded.

"Don't worry, it's not Callen if that's what you are thinking." He threw back with a glint in his eye that dared Sam to pursue that line of conversation. Then Eliot reached under his seat and pulled the package out that he had promised to deliver before leaving his friend behind.

"Kamran, I was asked to deliver this package to you." He handed the package across to the girl who glanced at her dad before reaching for the offered gift.

"Who is that from?" Sam challenged, "Kamran, maybe you should just give that to me."

"It wasn't sent to you, Hanna. I said I would deliver it to the girl and that's what I'm going to do." Eliot returned the challenge.

Aiden leaned in and whispered in her ear, "If you don't want to open it now, you don't have to. We could go for a walk on the beach and open it there. Do you want to do that?"

Kamran merely nodded and rose to follow her brother out onto the deck, "We're going to go for a walk," Aiden told the others.

"Don't go too far." Sam ordered.

"Yes, sir."

Sam began to speak when the doorbell rang followed by the opening of the door.

"Back here." Spencer yelled out.

Expectantly, those left sitting at the table turned to see who the mystery guests were. First through the door was Leroy Jethro Gibbs followed by Ziva and Marie.

"Jethro, I did not expect to see you back in these parts quite so soon." Hetty greeted in surprise.

"Henrietta, I have to say, I am as surprised as you." Gibbs answered looking across the room at Eliot.

Ziva was shocked by the site of him but said nothing.

"What the hell happened to you, Spencer." Gibbs asked equally shocked and unafraid to speak his mind.

"Life," was all the answer he was willing to give at the moment. "You have all met before except for Nate and Sophie. Nate Ford, Sophie Devereaux… Agents Leroy Jethro Gibbs, and Marie Pavlenko." He watched as recognition crossed Hetty's face.

"Marie!" Hetty called out, not trying to hide her surprise.

"Henrietta Lange, how are you?" Marie asked.

"I'm well, and you?" Hetty returned, noticing how pale the woman looked.

"I've been better, as I am sure you can relate." Marie replied in her adopted Romanian accent.

"Okay, so now that we are all here and accounted for, can we get on with this?" Sam growled moodily.

"I have to admit, I am intrigued, Mr. Spencer. What have we to talk about that would involve Marie?" Hetty asked, truly confused… a feeling she did not appreciate.

"What do you think I'm here to talk to you about… Callen." Eliot stated harshly.

"I've got nothing to say on the subject. He made it very clear where we stand. He chose to quit and go back to Blackguard, I presume, rather than stay and try to work it out. One more time he came into my kids' lives and then left as if their feelings didn't matter. I'm leaving." Sam got up to leave when Gibbs stepped in front of him.

"Stand down, Agent Hanna. Listen to what he has to say."

Sam and Gibbs stood toe to toe for a tense few moments before Sam backed down and moved back to his chair.

"Daddy, Daddy!" Kamran yelled running into the house.

"Baby, what's the matter?" Sam jumped up to check on her.

"Look what Uncle Callen sent me." Kamran handed him a delicate sand dollar incased in a mother of pearl framed shadow box. "He promised me we would go shell hunting but we never got to because he left. I said some awful things to him, Daddy! I told him I didn't need him and that I hated him! I told him I hated him and he still sent me this…. And he wrote me a letter."

Sam looked at the gift, it was certainly not a cheap gift and it showed care in the choosing, "He did. What did it say?"

"I don't think he is ever coming back this time. He said good bye. Uncle Callen never says good bye he always said he would see me later… What if I never get to tell him how sorry I am and that I never meant it? Can't we try and find him, Daddy? I know you are mad at him but I'm worried about him. Eric, can't you find him for me? Please?" Kamran begged.

Eric hated the sadness he saw in her eyes and heard in her voice, "I'm trying, Kamran. I just don't know if it will work."

Kamran nodded her understanding.

"Honey, can daddy see your letter, please?" Sam asked, "I promise, I will give it back to you."

Kamran debated only for a moment before handing the letter over to her father

Hey, Banana Hanna,

I know you are very angry with me right now and you have every right to be. This was something that had to happen. I don't expect you to ever understand and that is okay. Just please know that I never meant to break my promises to you, Aiden, or your mother. Things just got in the way. No matter what happens now, please know that I care about you and your brother.

Since it doesn't look like we will get that walk on the beach looking for shells, I found this one day and decided I had to send it to you. If you don't want to keep it, that's okay.

I hope you are staying up on your self-defense training. Your mother would be proud of the young woman you have become… I know I am. Stay safe.

Good-bye Kamran. Have a good life.

G Callen

Sam folded the letter up and handed it back to Kamran. "See daddy? He isn't coming back, is he?" Kamran asked with a tear trailing down her cheek.

Sam didn't say anything but turned to set his intense gaze on Eliot Spencer, "What do you know about this?"


	40. Chapter 40

**DISCLAIMER** **: You know… I saw where someone else did this on their first chapter and that was that. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO from this point forward, let it be known that I DO NOT OWN NOR CLAIM TO OWN any of the characters from NCIS LA/ NCIS/ Leverage. I DO, HOWEVER, OWN the characters of Marie, Victor, and Iosif. I also hold all rights to this story! Whew. This is the last time I am telling you but the info follows through to the end.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, that's one headache out of the way now, isn't it? Hope so. Cheesh. Okay, so on to the matters at hand. Things are beginning to pick up speed now. The whole clan is together. The good the bad and the Hetty! Sorry, that just happened. I couldn't stop myself. Well, here's the next chapter, I can't wait to hear what you think.**

 **Thank you to the new follower! Thank you to everyone who is reading and Oh so much thanks to those who are taking the time to drop me a line in messages and reviews. I look forward to reading them every day!**

 **For those who are just catching up… There are four stories in this story line so far. The first three that lead into this is "On the Other Side of Fear Lies Freedom", "The G Callen Job", and "A Time to Remember". Let me know what you think of those if you haven't read them yet and plan to do so.**

 **Here we go! Let me know your thoughts!**

Eliot looked at Kamran with sympathy before addressing the rest of the room with his reasoning for being there.

"I think that maybe the kids shouldn't be in here for this…" Eliot stated calmly.

"We can go watch a movie in the den, if that's okay?" Aiden offered.

"But I don't want to go!" Kamran demanded.

"Yes, Aiden. I think that would be a good idea. Kamran, go with your brother." Sam ordered… pleased when they followed his order.

"Callen has gone back to Blackguard." Eliot began again.

"That much we figured. What don't we know, Spencer?" Gibbs growled impatiently.

"His choice to go back was based on all of you." Eliot stated.

"Yeah, he made that painfully clear. We let him down… as if we could ever do anything but with his insane barriers." Sam threw back.

"I need you all to shut up and wait until I am finished." Eliot scowled at the people around him. "Callen didn't want to go. He had no choice." Eliot shot a look at Deeks who opened his mouth to speak then quickly closed it once he saw the look on Eliot's face.

"Long story short. Callen basically sacrificed what's left of his life so the lot of you can stay safe."

"Mr. Spencer. I appreciate your flare for being quick and to the point. However, in this case, I believe we require the longer story, don't you agree?" Hetty stated.

"Callen found the list that you wrote, "The Lost Children" and it started this whole mess. Then Marie showed up." Eric replied.

"I'm not sure how many of you are aware that when he came to Romania, it was my husband and myself who took care of him after the Comescu take down. It was a close call but he finally turned things around. It was only then that I realized the Blackguard had been restarted. What I didn't know until recently was that my husband, Victor, was the one who actually resurrected it… he was after the last of the original list… Grisha and Eliot. Blackguard had manipulated every aspect of Grisha's life from the moment they found out he existed. It was Victor who caused you to be held back from coming to get Clara and the children… Blackguard had initiated the murder of Clara Callen and the arrest and subsequent jailing of Nikita. They were the reason the children were separated and ultimately… they murdered Amy Callen to prevent her from finding her brother and getting in the way of his training." Marie explained, "They had hoped both children would take after their parents… Amy was more concerned about her brother. Callen, having forgotten his past, was more than pliable. He quickly began showing signs of the agent he was to become. Everything that has happened since has been because of the Blackguard's interference."

"So why would he willingly go back to them once he found out the truth." Kensi asked, confused.

"As I said, it's a long story." Eliot answered.

"Maybe this will help." Eric added, "This is everything we have gathered…. Plus, this came in my mail today. It's from Callen. He asked me to make sure you got it." Eric handed the packed to Hetty, "Please don't tell him I gave you the rest of this stuff. He doesn't want any of you involved. I just can't stand by and watch him get himself killed because he thinks you matter more."

"He could have just been upfront and honest with us and we could have helped him but once again he went lone wolf." Sam retorted.

"If any of you ever just once tried to see things from his point of view instead of judging it, maybe we wouldn't be in this mess!" Eliot accused… "You want to know what happened to me? I will tell you. Blackguard wanted Callen. When he wouldn't return their calls because he wanted to appease you, they decided they needed to send him a message… me. What Callen was unaware of at the time… or at least that's what he has led us to believe… was that Iosif Romanoff works for Blackguard. I just spent a few weeks with the bastard. He is an evil son of …. His sole purpose is to bring pain to his captives. He relishes in watching them suffer… only to the point where they can take no more and he leaves them to rest until they have healed enough to start the process of torture all over again. These bruises? These scars?" Eliot roared as he pulled his shirt over his head to show them the rest of the injuries he had hidden until now and caused a sharp intake in breath from more than one individual at the table, "These are just a sampling of what he is capable of. A few years back, he had captured Callen and for more than a month he tortured him until he finally made his escape. You know what happened when he found him once again and took your daughter, Sam. Iosif is just waiting for another opportunity to pick up where he left off. Callen went back because your kids were put on the new list they are creating. Callen found out and he made a deal with that devil, Victor. His life for that of your family. He knew that you were in danger as long as their names were on that list, Sam. They would kill you to get to your kids. Callen has said more than once that Kamran takes after her mother… Aiden, after you. He told me that he didn't want Deeks and Kensi to have to worry about that list when they decided to have children… so, he bargained for the whole of the OSP as well as my team to be safe if he agreed to come back to work for him. They accepted, so long as he cut all ties with us. That package you have there, Hetty, is everything you need to shut down Victor and Blackguard… Callen went back for Iosif… he has no intention of surviving this round… he simply wants to make sure he takes him out at the same time. You go over all this stuff and we will meet when you are done… one way or another, I'm bringing Callen home. I refuse to let him die at the hands of that sadistic bastard. He deserves a hell of a lot better than the hand he has been dealt." Eliot grabbed his shirt up and stalked from the room.

The room sat in silence as the door slammed shut behind him. No one quite knew what to say at first. Finally, Nate spoke up, "I don't know you all, but I have spent some time with Callen. I'm not sure how much you know about their past but I'm guessing it was an intense one. I've seen Eliot fight for this team and put himself into harm's way more often than I'm comfortable with… but I've not seen him this worked up over another person."

"They have known each other since they were in the military. They were on the same special ops team." Ziva responded, "I met Callen on a mission and stayed in contact and though I never met him until now, I learned of him through Callen. You know as well as I do that Callen shares little of his past but Eliot has been a good friend to him."

"Callen spent a brief period of time with us and he was struggling with his decision to come back here. He cares deeply for you all despite how much he felt hurt by you. I'm going to hazard a guess and say his return did not go well." Nate continued.

"No, it did not, I'm afraid and now he has gone above and beyond to burn every bridge back he had." Gibbs grumbled, "His only hope is whatever you have in that package, Hetty. It better be what Eliot thinks it is… or Leon won't be accepting him back even IF he survives to come back."

Sam sat quietly, not hearing a single word. His kids' names had been added to the very list that had pretty much dictated and destroyed his ex-partners life. Callen had willingly given up his freedom in order to ensure the safety of his kids and himself included. His mind swirled over the facts and the implications of said facts. He needed to see the rest of the information before he could just take what Eliot said on blind faith.

"I say we call it a night and we will meet in Ops first thing in the morning and start going through all the information you have given us. Mr. Beale, would you be free to help us sort through all the pertinent information?" Hetty asked.

"Uh, yeah, sure." Eric answered, relieved to finally be able to unburden himself of all he had been keeping secret from the rest of the team.

"Very good. We shall talk more after we are finished. Please let Mr. Spencer know that should he require any assistance with his injuries to let me know and I will see to it a doctor is made available to him."

"Thank you." Sophie replied.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Slowly the team made its way out towards the cars when Hetty turned to Marie, "Do you have a place to stay?"

"I have a hotel room," she responded.

"If you would be inclined, we could stop and pick your things up and you could stay with me. Gibbs, you and Ziva as well. We must consider the safety of all concerned," Hetty offered.

"Thank you, Hetty. I would be happy to accept your kind offer. Victor believes I am dead. It would be wise to allow him to continue believing this." Marie returned.

"He believes you are dead?" Hetty asked, confused.

"I'm afraid my husband became aware of my intent to come here and tell Grisha the truth about the list and Blackguard. On the day I was to meet with Grisha, Victor showed up first and after an in-depth discussion, which I recorded, he proceeded to shoot me. If not for Grisha, I would be dead." Marie explained.

"Good Heavens," Hetty responded in shock. "Mr. Deeks, would you and your wife be so kind as to retrieve Mrs. Pavlenko's things and bring them to Dovecote… Leroy, Miss David, if you would do me the favor of accompanying us home as added security, I think it would be wise."

"We haven't checked in anywhere yet, so, not a problem, Hetty. Why don't you just go with us and then Sam can go on home with the kids."

"Very well, Mr. Hanna, please take your children home and we will meet at the office first thing tomorrow. Please, all of you, be safe. We have no clue as to what we are dealing with. We must assume if what Mr. Spencer says is true… that in all likelihood, we are being watched." Hetty replied, the concern evident.

"You be careful," Sam stated, "tomorrow then."


	41. Chapter 41

**DISCLAIMER** **: I already told you, not repeating it again.**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Good day. Sorry I didn't post yesterday… did I scare you? LOL I was gone all afternoon and by the time I came home, I wasn't feeling all that great and curled up in my chair with a blanket and called it a day. So… here I am, making up for lost time. If I get a good turn out on reviews… maybe I could be convinced to add another chapter tonight… maybe. I'm going away again this afternoon so… it would be later tonight if I do. ANYHOO! Shall we begin? Yes, Eliot is a bit unhinged in his reaction to the LA team. I think for good reason… plus, Eliot isn't the most patient of individuals. He's a "get the job done" kind of guy. I think his biggest beef is with Sam and Hetty. But, they all come together as one and so…. Enjoy! Let me know what you think.**

 **Thanks to all that have begun following and those who hit that favorite button… thank you. To everyone who takes the time to leave even a few words… you have no idea what that means to a writer (well, unless you are also a writer and then you do too know… hmmmmm)… but thanks.**

"That went well…" Sophie spoke softly as she closed the door behind their visitors.

"Is that what you call that?" Hardison scoffed as he walked by, plopping down on the couch.

"It certainly could have gone better." Nate remarked, "Eliot was not his most composed."

"It could just as easily have gone worse." Sophie reminded, "at least most of them seem to be willing to work with Eliot… this Sam seems to be very combative, however."

"That was Callen's ex-partner", Eliot stated as he walked into the room. "Callen didn't exactly leave here on the best of terms with people. He made sure he cut all ties for their safety."

"I don't understand, why didn't he just tell them what was going on? Instead he went out there on his own to face off with someone you have said nearly killed him not once but twice already." Nate stated.

"Callen will never ask for anyone to fight his battles. They never had in the past and when this team did, they have gotten hurt so he won't expect them to now." Eliot explained as he ran a hand over his face and through his hair.

"So, what are you hoping to accomplish with this?" Nate asked him carefully.

Eliot looked up at his friend and sighed, shaking his head. "I'm hoping to save his life. I'm hoping to save his future. He has given up and given in because he thinks that's all he deserves. They need to prove to him that he's wrong. They need him and he needs to see that as much as he needs to see that he doesn't have to fight alone… that HE needs THEM. Maybe we don't get the happily ever after but we can still have family."

"You said 'we'… are you including yourself in this? Do you really believe you aren't worthy of a happily ever after relationship?" Sophie asked in surprise.

Eliot thought a moment and then sighed before answering, "You don't understand the life Callen and I have lived. You do what we have done and you give up the idea of marriage and family. It's not in the cards for us… but…"

"But we can be your family, right Eliot?" Parker threw out quickly, hopefully. "We can still be family."

Eliot cast a fleeting glance around the room, "yeah, Parker, something like that… something like this, we can have. He needs to see that it can happen for him and they won't turn their backs on him… like all the rest have."

Parker's smile widened at that, "well then, we need to go get G Callen and find him a family."

Eliot rolled his eyes, "Parker, we HAVE a family for him… The OSP… just as soon as I knock some sense into them." He growled.

"Eliot, I believe by everyone's reactions that they are more than ready to listen… except for, perhaps, this Sam." Nate explained.

"Yes, and you have to look at this from his perspective. He has children involved. From what I understand, one of them has already been involved more than she should ever have been. He is protecting his children. That's what a father does." Sophie added.

"Yeah, well, I wouldn't know anything about that." Eliot mumbled, "I have no doubt that Deeks and probably his wife, are completely behind this… Eric is obvious in his loyalty. I don't know about this Hetty… there is more going on with her where this is concerned than she is letting on. If I see that, Callen will… Tomorrow will tell me what I need to know."

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Later that evening as Hetty's company all settled in and were relaxing in her library, she looked to Marie, "I must say, Marie, I feared we may never see each other again. It has been a long time, my friend."

"Indeed" Marie answered, "Who would have known it would be little Grisha that brought us back together again."

"What surprises me is how he managed to find YOU when he was hurt while taking down those blasted Comescus." Hetty stated.

"It wasn't Grisha, it was his father, Nikita…"

"Nikita? Well, isn't that interesting. So, the man does show up once in a while." Hetty shook her head, "If only we knew where he was right now. Mr. Callen could certainly have used the guidance of a father."

"I am not certain Nikita could have reached Grisha this time… too much time separated them as father and son. Too much time separated Grisha from anyone who cared for him. It ripped my heart out to see him so broken and it hasn't improved with time since he came back. What happened here?" Marie asked.

"One mistake and it all fell apart. I simply don't think Mr. Callen has ever felt himself to be at home here or anywhere else for that matter." Hetty replied sadly, "He has never learned to trust."

"Well, Hetty, in his defense, your team turned their backs on him pretty darn quick." Gibbs shook his head, "I am still stymied at how you managed to flush nearly 10 years down the toilet."

Hetty's eyes narrowed as she looked across at the one who had helped her save the man in question from himself in order to bring him into the fold of NCIS. "Agent Gibbs, I make no excuses for the mistakes of this team, but we have tried to reach Mr. Callen and make amends. He has been unwilling to give us that opportunity."

"Hetty, your insistence at keeping secrets from him has not helped you in the least," Ziva offered, "Callen has mentioned to me more than once that you just keep too many secrets. He appreciates all you have done for him but he needs honesty from you."

Hetty couldn't argue but the reality was, there were simply too many things that Callen was better off not knowing and she was determined to take those secrets to her grave.

"Grisha was so incredibly hurt and angry when we spoke. He seemed no less angry this time. I had thought he was coming back to attempt to reconnect with his family here. He made the choice to return to the Blackguard because Victor is threatening you, your team, and their families. I do not understand why this distance prevails between you. His mother would be heartbroken at the state of her boy… It is hard to tell what Victor has done to him by now… and if Iosif Romanoff gets a hold of him it will be a very bad thing. That man deserves everything bad that happens to him after what he has done to Grisha in the past!" Marie's voice grew bold and angry.

"How do you know what he has done to Mr. Callen?" Hetty asked, not appreciating being the one without the information.

"I have seen the scars, Henrietta. There are many." Marie answered solemnly, "physical as well as emotional."

Hetty said nothing more but sat staring into the fireplace, wishing it was lit so that it might chase the chill that ran through her at the thought of anyone doing that to the only son she would ever have.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Sam entered the courtyard and headed straight for Hetty's desk.

"Your children, Mr. Hanna?" she looked him over carefully then looked to the two kids sitting on the couch in the bull pen.

"I can't take a chance with their safety. Considering what Eliot said last night, knowing what Callen did for my family… I'm not risking their safety." Sam sank into the chair in the front of her desk.

Hetty considered the man in front of her, "Understood… of course you shouldn't".

"So, is anyone else here?" he asked.

"Eric and Nell have been here, pretty much, all night in Ops preparing things. Agents Gibbs and David, as well as, Marie are up there with them." Hetty confirmed, closing her lap top.

"Do you trust this Marie?" Sam asked.

Leaning back in her seat as she poured another cup of tea, she looked up to Ops, "Everything she says checks out. Jethro did, in fact, spend time with her while Mr. Callen recovered from his injuries following the take down of the Comescu compound. He tells me Mr. Callen's wounds were quite severe." Hetty replied gravely.

"So, why would Victor spend so much time saving him then if his intent was only to get him killed? It doesn't make sense," Sam stated.

"I do not believe he wishes Mr. Callen ill health. He values his talents very much. As much as you wish to believe Mr. Callen is incapable of all that has come to light… he has been trained for many things others think only happens in the movies. He has been tasked with Government sanctioned assassinations, interrogations for intelligence gatherings by any means necessary…" Hetty shook her head sadly.

"I just can't believe the G Callen I knew and welcomed into my family is nothing short of a paid killer who tortures people." Sam shook his head. "He hid that side of himself very well."

"He also was very good at hiding the pain it caused him. Remember, Mr. Hanna, those he killed, those he questioned were not innocent individuals. They were very much guilty of the most heinous crimes and a danger to this country." Hetty added.

"They were still human beings…" Sam began as Hetty cleared her throat before interrupting.

"Really, Mr. Hanna, need I remind you of some of your dealings with such individuals in your past? I am not suggesting I approve of his involvement but only to the extent that I know what the job has cost him. Mr. Callen is a good man who has made poor personal choices if only for the right reasons. Remember, Sam, many choices he has made of late are because of the very people he was most hurt by only to keep us safe. Ahhh, there are the last two stragglers. Hmmm, no morning banter today it would seem. Shall we go and join the others?" Hetty asked rising from her seat followed by Sam.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

As the last four entered the OSP operations center, the room fell silent. "Mr. Beale, before we begin, let me remind you all why we are here. Mr. Callen is believed to be in grave danger. I have taken great care in reviewing the information Mr. Callen has gathered and passed on to me. There is, indeed, more than enough to shut down Blackguard. Understand, the work Mr. Callen has done is above question. While perhaps it may go against the nature of those present, it is still a job that requires doing from time to time. Now, Mr. Beale, what have you to share with us." Hetty drew their attention to the far end of the room where Eric stood poised with his tablet in hand… taking a steadying breath he looked around the room at each individual present as he prepared for what was to come.


	42. Chapter 42

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hello! Well, I promised I would post a second chapter if I the reviews showed an interest. Y'all are FANTASTIC! Such wonderful reviews. Thank you! Things are jumping now! Everybody is in the mix at this point. But there will still be a few surprises coming, I think. I will say, do not be surprised or disappointed if I don't post something for a day or two here and there. As we have moved through this journey and I have read over the story… AGAIN… I'm not sold on everything in future chapters. I may have to reread and tweak a few things here and there. It won't be a long wait, I promise. A day or two at the most… and I will post as soon as each day's chapter is ready… I just want to make sure I get it right. But hey! If you have thoughts on where you think this is going… now is the time to share… maybe it will be the thing to help me seal the deal on how I do the showdown! Okay, well, here you go… Stop by and say hi… let me know what you think!**

"Right, well it began… on my part anyway, when he received the first message from Joelle. It was obvious he wasn't surprised that she was alive. Anyway, he first went to Eliot's friends to ask assistance… I don't know why he didn't just ask me but he didn't. Eventually, they asked for my help in looking into Blackguard."

"So, you ARE the one breaking into the CIA databases?" The question came from the doorway.

"Director", Eric's voice, a mere squeak.

"Mr. Beale… relax, you are safe. Agent Callen saw to that. Now shall we continue?" Director Leon Vance spoke in a low commanding voice.

"You said the first note from Joelle… just how many were there?" Sam asked.

"Oh, uh, two actually." Eric answered as he put both on the large screen for all to read.

"Cryptic at best" Gibbs stated, "Did Callen understand what she was saying?"

"No. He seemed quite confused by it. That's one reason why he started looking back into Blackguard. He said it was farfetched but he wondered if her reference… here…" he pointed to the word guard, "was meant to point toward Blackguard. Turns out it wasn't so farfetched in the end."

"After everything she had done and the way she had hurt him so badly, why would Callen be interested in anything she had to say?" Kensi remarked. After seeing the pain he dealt with at her betrayal, following the reveal of her true identity, Kensi would have loved nothing more than a few minutes alone with the woman.

"There's more to it than we knew. Joelle became a liability with Blackguard because she actually cared for Callen and they feared what she might give away. In the end, he had agreed to not only help her disappear but he also agreed to watch over her son. She feared they might go after him and her husband. Now looking back, we know why she was really concerned for her son's safety. It had nothing to do with the issues of the moment but more to do with 'the list'," Eric answered.

"So, she knew about the list then?" Deeks asked. He couldn't help be amazed at the amount of people Callen had been charged with looking after… and none of them aware except for Sam and that was only because of the kidnapping of Kamran. Callen just silently went through life watching out for everyone he cared for, never allowing anyone to do the same for him. If he got the chance, he was going to have a word with him on the subject.

"In the beginning when everything was first happening and she was dating Callen? I'm not sure. This was the only contact they had had since she left. He never knew of her whereabouts and other than these two messages, he never spoke with her, that I know of." Eric answered, growing frustrated by the interruptions.

"Go on, Beale", Gibbs urged.

"Hardison had been trying to get into the CIA's database in order to find out more about Blackguard. He managed to break through the initial firewall and found the original list, labeled "The Lost Children". After that, he kept getting knocked out. They use an interesting but challenging security system. It's called the Steranko Security System. This thing has a brain of its own!" Beale looked at Nell and continued, "This thing learns from your reactions to it. You wouldn't believe what it did to Eliot's team when they came up against it on a case once!"

"BEALE!" Gibbs growled, "focus"!

Beale stopped and looked at Gibbs in surprise and blushed as he continued.

"Okay… it took me awhile but I managed to find my way around the security system to get into the stuff we were looking for. The weekend at the beach really seemed to be a catalyst for a lot of things. I am not certain what was going on but Callen was distracted by something after he came back from his walk with Kamran. Later, I was checking on some things that popped up in my searches while we had been there. I had found yet another version of the list. It really upset Callen and he told me that he was going to have to go away for a few days and that I wasn't to tell anyone… he also made me swear not to discuss the list or messages with anyone else."

"You say he was upset over something with Kamran?" Sam asked in alarm, "Why wouldn't he come to me with this? I thought I made it abundantly clear he wasn't to interfere with my family."

"Sam, if he hadn't interfered with your family, Kamran wouldn't be here. Remember? He brought her home." Deeks stated calmly.

"Remember that HE is the very reason she was in danger in the first place? This is the very reason Agents kept their families secret. You will understand when you and Kensi start having kids." Sam growled.

"Someone was following me and I was scared, so I asked Uncle Callen. He came to check on me at school." Kamran explained as she and Aiden walked into the room.

"Aiden, you two are not to be in here," Sam admonished.

"Leave it be, Sam" Hetty said turning back to the kids, "Please, explain, Miss Hanna."

Kamran looked around the room nervously, "I didn't want to worry daddy," she began looking at her father then, "you just came back to work and I didn't want to worry you. I was afraid you'd quit and Uncle Callen would leave…"

"I'm your father, it's my job to worry. Aiden, you knew about this? You should have told me." Sam stated harshly.

"Sorry, dad, but I'm with Kamran on this. Besides, I wasn't convinced that she wasn't just imagining it." Aiden explained.

"and was she?... imagining it?" Gibbs asked.

"No."

"Uncle Callen said it was all a misunderstanding." Kamran assured them.

"A misunderstanding?" Hetty asked, looking to Aiden who shook his head, "Mister Hanna… something more to add?"

"All I know is, Uncle Callen said it was taken care of for now, but I needed to keep an eye on things," Aiden replied looking to his father, "Dad, he wanted to tell you… he did, I swear… but I promised to watch out for her and he checked in with us often."

"Did he happen to mention who was following her?" Gibbs asked.

"No, sir, sorry."

"Thank you… now I really think you should take your sister downstairs." Leon directed.

"Yes, sir" Aiden answered, taking his sister by the arm and heading for the door when Kamran turned back.

"We're going to get Uncle Callen back, right?" Kamran asked desperately.

"I don't know, baby… but we are going to try. Stay with your brother." Sam answered honestly.

"Miss Jones, would you please help them get settled somewhere?" Leon suggested. With a nod, Nell followed the kids out.

After they left, Eric continued, "When he came back, it just kept getting worse. Callen was angry and on edge. He had told Eliot to take his friends back home and keep them safe. He even took them to the airport on his way to, apparently, Kamran's school. Unfortunately, they didn't listen. Sophie and Nate ended up coming here. Shortly after that, Eliot went missing. Callen found out Hetty authored the list and Joelle had been murdered. He disappeared for nearly two weeks, during which, I chose to take my leave time. Hardison had called me and told me about Eliot missing, so I went to stay with them while we attempted to find both Eliot AND Callen. Callen then, apparently, came here to see you before I was finally able to tell him about Eliot." Eric stopped a moment to look at his tablet as he prepared for the next part.

"While we searched for Eliot and continued looking into Blackguard and your possible connection," Eric cringed, waiting for Hetty's admonishment… when none came, he continued while noticing the various grins around the room at his expense. Hetty wasn't the only one who had noticed Eric's new-found boldness.

"Okay, so, Marie called and set up a meeting with Callen which we spoke briefly of last evening. Marie had given him some of the last bits of information he needed to shut down Blackguard. He just needed a few more pieces. He wanted to know more of this list and why it kept changing." Eric continued.

"Kept changing?" Ziva inquired.

"Yeah, the first was a mere list of names," Eric explained as he threw each list up on the screen as he covered the time line. Slowly the screen filled with one piece of evidence after another, as everyone gathered moved forward to read and take in the provided information. "Marie also gave him a written version of the list. This is the one that shows that this is about more than just Callen and Eliot…" Eric shot a picture of the written list which now contained new names. Names of children of today's agents, Aiden and Kamran and Joelle's son among them.

"Aiden and Kamran… Sam" Deeks said, quietly stepping up to support their friend.

"I know… Eliot was telling the truth," Sam answered.

"Of course, he was telling the truth. Why would he lie?" Eric asked defensively. Sam turned to look at the young man in shock. Eric had never dared speak to them in that tone.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply…" Sam began to apologize but Eric chose to ignore him and moved on.

"Callen didn't take kindly to the new list. Then there is this… Marie's conversation with Victor leading up to the point where he shot and nearly killed her."

The room fell silent but for the uncomfortable shuffling and shocked sighs at what they heard. Hetty cast a glance in Marie's direction and noticed the tear that stubbornly found its way down her cheek at hearing the man she had loved for so many years speak so callously about his own children and then Callen and Eliot… how little worth he held for the men outside their talents within their jobs. It ended with the desperate pleas from Callen for Marie to hang on until help arrived and the conversation the shared up until the point where he found the phone and it shut off.

Sam cringed knowing Callen had heard yet one more person refer to him as a monster… worth nothing more than what he had been trained to do for his country.

"So, what are these dates written next to the names on the list," Kensi asked.

"We wondered the same thing. Turns out, each person died on those days listed."

"Then what's with Eliot's name? He most certainly is not dead." Hetty requested.

"That was back when they were first working for the CIA. Callen had said a mission ended badly and Eliot was considered MIA and feared dead… In truth, Callen had helped him disappear. Eliot wanted out."

"Why didn't he just quit," Deeks asked.

"Because, you never just quit the Blackguard…" Marie spoke finally.

"So, they WERE both with Blackguard once before." Hetty stated rather than asked.

"Fearfully, yes." Marie answered, "Callen helped Eliot to leave… letting them believe him to be dead. Callen then found himself on the receiving end of a mission gone wrong… the powers that be suspected Callen's involvement in Eliot's 'demise', if you will, and sought to teach him a lesson… things went a bit far and they cut ties and left him out in the cold to cover their bases."

"You telling me they did that to him on purpose!" Gibbs growled, "Who is the one that was calling the shots for the original Blackguard?"

Marie chuckled, "That, Agent Gibbs is an answer you are unlikely to find. This is the CIA, they like their secrets. This was a group that answers to no one. The last thing they would want to do is give out the director's identity."

"Good thing because if I ever got my hands on the…"

"I do not disagree, Jethro. However, we need to deal with the present director" Hetty interrupted.

"Henrietta is correct," Vance agreed, "Eric, is there anything else?"

Eric cleared his throat, "Callen disappeared after this came to light. He didn't know who to trust. I suspected he'd gone back to Blackguard in order to find Eliot and deal with the list. I just couldn't believe he didn't at least tell me… he just kinda fired me."

"Classic Callen", Sam mumbled.

"Okay, so, this explains the past several months. We still have no idea where Agent Callen is or what the endgame is" Leon Vance shoved his hands into his pockets as he paced back and forth in front of the screen, "Henrietta… is there enough to close this guy down?"

"Yes, Leon. Our boy was very thorough… I was waiting for the proper moment. We do not want the snake to slither away but we need to find Mr. Callen. If not, we may never be able to." Hetty replied, looking at both Gibbs and Leon knowingly.

"Hetty, I want only the best for Agent Callen. However, he no longer is an employee of NCIS in any capacity. He is no longer our responsibility. He made that very clear to me when he sent in his resignation. He also made it abundantly clear this team was to move on. He no longer needed or wanted their interference." Leon offered, casting a look in Gibbs's direction.

"So, Leon, you telling me you agree with him?" Gibbs asked.

"We can't do that, Director!" Kensi shouted, "Callen could be in trouble. What we NEED to do is go save him!"

"Agent Blye, I am well aware of what I can and cannot do." Leon answered evenly.

"Yes, Sir," Kensi returned, looking down before turning her head enough to cast a glance at Deeks and then back up to the screen.

"Now, as I said, Callen made it clear he felt there was no need for further interference from NCIS. There is no denying he is an incredibly talented and often sought-after operative. The one thing that frequently stands in his way when it comes to long term work situations is his inability to accept help or work with others… in that, he did better with NCIS than anywhere else. He will shortly be out of a job and if we don't find him soon that will be the least of his problems."

Gibbs and Hetty shared a knowing smile. Leon wasn't about to risk one of his best operatives even if that operative was a lone wolf named G Callen.

"This is where we bring Eliot and his friends into the mix", Hetty stated putting her phone in her pocket.

"Why? I mean I get Eliot but what do we need the rest of them for? Eric knows more than this Hardison and I'm not even sure what the rest of them do." Sam bristled at the fact these people were treading in their business.

Eric stiffened at Sam's tone. He struggled to understand where the man stood on the situation at all. Was he for or against helping Callen? Eric pulled himself up straight, his shoulders back as he responded to the present team lead, "Seriously, Sam! What's your problem with them? What, because they don't have 'agent' in front of their names they aren't good enough? Eliot is a great guy… a bit scary at times… but then so is Callen… ANYWAY! They are smart and good at what they do. They may not chase after terrorists and leaders of drug cartels but they help those who need justice, find it! They even do undercover work. Most importantly, they are Callen's friends… more so than any of you have been. Maybe that's it, maybe you're jealous." Eric shouted as he stood back shocked at his own outburst as much as everyone else in the room.

Hetty cleared her throat and pursed her lips in an effort to hide the proud smirk tugging at her mouth, "Thank you, Mr. Beale, that is quite sufficient, I think."

"Sorry, Hetty. I just needed to get that off my chest. Callen deserves more respect than he's been given by SOME people here." Eric shot a glance at Sam.

"And you have done an admirable job, Mr. Beale. Be that as it may be, Mr. Hanna… it is perhaps safe to say, these people, Marie and agents Gibbs and David included, have all spent far more time with Mr. Callen during the course of the past few years than we have. He is not the same person that left here. What drives him has changed to a certain degree… but one thing that remains, he trusts few if any at this point. Mr. Spencer and his friends are perhaps our best way of getting to know and understand this G Callen. Speaking of, Mr. Beale, would you be so kind as to go and let our guests in and escort them up here to Ops please."

"Yeah, sure!" Eric replied, rushing out the door, thankful for the escape.


	43. Chapter 43

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: WHEW! Okay, I have read, re-read, and re-read again. I added a few things… a pinch of this and a dash of that… I hope you like. I feel a little better about them all right now. I think we are getting everyone to where they need to be for their next leg of the journey. Let me know what you think. THANK YOU for the reviews! Always!**

As the door closed behind him, Hetty faced the room.

"Wow!" Kensi sighed, "What's gotten into him, lately?" she asked in awe. "That is NOT the same Eric of a few months ago."

"Our Mr. Beale has graduated to the next level and as such, should be congratulated. He has shown a great amount of loyalty for Mr. Callen and I dare say it was returned. It is to be admired and respected." Hetty replied.

"I don't know, I like this Eric." Deeks stated.

"Me too" Nell agreed, blushing.

"Yes, well, looking at all the information presented here today, I think we can all agree that Mr. Callen needs and deserves our help. Whether or not we welcome him back into our team is a conversation for another time. For now, we need to get down to business and deal with the case at hand." Hetty replied.

"Yes, to the case at hand," Eliot repeated as he stepped through the door, "Are we all on the same page now?"

"I am not certain, Mr. Spencer. Have you shared everything on your end?" Hetty asked pointedly.

Eliot returned her intense gaze, "Iosif has had it in for Callen for some time. He finds joy in the art of torture. I'm not sure when our government decided to hire a monster like him. Callen is on a suicide mission with this guy. Since his return here to try and make amends, he has been looking for the ammunition he needed to shut Blackguard down. When he finally did, he realized Iosif was back and a part of Blackguard. He will not rest until Iosif's ended. When I left him, Callen was convinced he was beyond redemption… that the only thing he had left to offer was putting an end to the list and bringing down Iosif. I've seen Callen go after some serious characters but Iosif is different. He's one of Callen's demons. He is a reminder of his darker side. They have a history… a very bad, dark history. Iosif will kill him. Now, you are either going to help or you're not but I need an answer… as in now. You see him as family or you don't, at this point, that is not what's important. However, as far as I can see, he's more than proved his allegiance to you." Eliot challenged. He looked around the room slowly. He knew Nate had questions where Callen was concerned, but his team would support him regardless. However, his team was not cut out for this type of mission. He couldn't risk their safety on something they were not prepared for. He needed THIS team… Callen's team. He needed them united in whatever way possible… he just needed to make sure they would back him up long enough to kill Iosif and save Callen.

Marie looked at the faces around the room. "So many people gathered for a man who feels eternally alone. Victor is to blame and he MUST pay for that misery. Victor WAS correct about one thing, that he had created two very formidable individuals in Grisha and Eliot, here… little did he know they'd be his undoing. Little did he know that they would be loved by so many. Do not let my husband win."

Hetty admired this Eliot. He was very much like G Callen. He was loyal to those who proved worthy. She was thankful the two men had this friendship. She looked at the remaining members of her team now and saw a united determination that had been missing for a very long time. They would do this and hopefully… finally, they would bring their team lead home for good.

"Eliot, whatever you need, I'm in." Eric offered strongly. Eliot liked the kid. He had spunk. The fact that Callen trusted him spoke volumes. He gave him an approving nod and continued to look to the others before coming to rest on Leon, "You… who are you?"

"Leon Vance… director of NCIS. It's good to meet you, Mr. Spencer." Leon held his hand out expectantly and Eliot obliged respectfully.

"So," Eliot pushed.

"I believe I can safely speak for everyone present when I say we are behind you in this? Hetty replied.

"Good. This will be an unsanctioned mission, not sure the Director of NCIS should be involved," Eliot stated as he looked once more in Leon's direction, his brows raised.

Leon gave an annoyed smirk as he turned to Gibbs, "Keep me apprised, Agent Gibbs. Henrietta, proceed with caution." Leon ordered as he headed out the door.

"Mr. Spencer… am I to assume you have a plan for getting him back?" Hetty asked.

"Yes, we are going to find out where he is and then we are going to go in and get him out."

"A bit simplistic, don't you think?" Hetty smirked, looking over her glasses rim at him.

"Look, there is only one outcome to expect with this. We are going in and bring Callen out but Iosif won't be coming out alive. He's going down and he's staying down." Eliot growled, "If you can't live with that, don't come."

"All well and good, Eliot, but we need to find him first." Ziva replied calmly.

"I know where he is at… or at least I will in just a minute." Eliot returned with equal calm before being interrupted.

"Okay, next question is, how do we know he's even with Iosif?" Gibbs asked.

"Because that IS his endgame." Eliot spoke calmly and simply, "Callen knew that Victor and Blackguard were finished. He had seen to it. He knew that despite what issues remained between him and Hetty, she would make certain that once the information was received the task would be finished. He had been working on this for a long time. He knew that timing would be everything and so he put things in play to ensure that we would come together and take Iosif down once he had gotten inside and we could find him."

"How did he know that you would be able to get us all to agree after what he pulled when he left here?" Nell asked, "I mean he didn't exactly leave here as a friend."

"It had nothing to do with him… did it? He figured with what Iosif did to Kamran that Sam would jump at the chance to take this guy down. He wasn't expecting anything for himself." Deeks replied as everything started to fall into place.

"Exactly. He knew if Sam found out it was Iosif, he would be more than willing to help take him down. He also knew that if Sam went, the rest of you would follow." Kensi finished Deeks thoughts

"All well and good. How did he intend for us to be able to even get to Iosif?" Gibbs demanded.

"When Hetty received the final evidence against Victor he was going after Iosif. Easiest way in was to become a liability. As soon as he let me walk again and Victor found out… he would realize it was Callen's plan to undermine him. He would also know that I would never just let Callen stay there… not after Iosif. He will no doubt be watching. Be careful… This guy is dangerous. Make no mistake… he WILL view Callen as a liability and what better payback than to let him suffer at the hands of Iosif Romanoff… Let's not forget Callen killed several of his family members in the Comescu take down…" Eliot answered.

"How is Callen being handed over to this guy going to put an end to him? I doubt this Iosif is going to take any chances with letting him escape again. So, how is Callen going to get word to you as to where they are?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, I still don't see how that make any sense…" Deeks queried. It wasn't in his nature to roll over and he knew dang well it wasn't Callen's, "I just don't see Callen allowing someone else to take this guy down… he would do it himself."

Eliot flashed a smirk, his demeanor darkening as he spoke, "What don't you get? Callen has no intention of coming out alive… but he is counting on me to take Iosif Romanoff down. He knew the only way to get to him was from inside. Callen would only find Iosif when and if Victor tired of his games and threw him to the wolves. He was now well aware of how to push Victor's buttons. He had every intention of pushing them all. Now, here's the fun part… Callen had a tracker in place so I could find him. His final piece of the puzzle. He had to make sure that I wouldn't use the tracker before he was ready so he tinkered with it. Each letter he sent you contains a part of the code needed to connect to the tracker he is using. He made sure there was no way we would figure it out before he was actually with Iosif. Knowing Eric, the way he did… this was the safest bet… And the last part should be on the information he sent Hetty yesterday. Which means..."

"That means Iosif has already had several days with Callen to do who knows what…" Sam finished the sentence. It angered him that Callen found himself so damned expendable all the time. It also angered him that he was a part of the reason his partner saw himself that way now. He couldn't help hearing the pleas of his daughter playing over and over again in his head. Callen was right about one thing… he was going to make sure this Iosif went down and stayed down for all the damage he caused this team… Sam's family… and Callen was coming home… alive.

"I wondered…" Eric cried out as he and Nell scrambled through the letters they had all received, placing them in order of the day they were sent and the day they were received. "Okay, got it!" Nell called out as Eric typed away at his computer, "and… there he is… I'm searching for cameras now."

"Callen sure knows his way around electronics, doesn't he?" Hardison asked, not expecting a reply.

"Necessity, Mr. Hardison. He spent many, many years working alone before he ever came to NCIS. As a boy he was quite curious," Hetty grinned at the memory of a young boy who loved tearing things apart and putting them back together just to see how they worked, "that curiosity did much more than just get him in trouble." She left the rest to their imaginations… those memories and stories would wait for another day. Hopefully, he would be there to share some of them himself.

As they waited anxiously for word, Hetty's phone rang, "Hello?" she answered cautiously, "Arkady? You must slow down… What has happened?... When?... Oh Bugger! Yes, very well. I will get back with you shortly. I would ask that you contact the others." Hetty pocketed her phone.

"What's going on Hetty? What's that old Russian want now?" Gibbs asked.

"We have a problem… He just received word as to Garrison's whereabouts."

"Where?" Gibbs asked again.

"Iosif has been a busy boy. It appears he has gotten his hands on Mr. Callen's father." Hetty stated, her mouth forming a grim line.

"Great, one more to worry about." Deeks groaned.

"Yes, well let's hope he's still alive. I am worried about his reasoning following the events in Romania." Hetty stated.

"This is not a good thing, Henrietta" Marie added, "Iosif will use him against his son. There is already so much anger between those two. I fear what this will do to what little relationship they have left.

"Then we need to get moving." Eliot stated gruffly.

"Due diligence, Mr. Spencer. We plan… then we act."

"Then I suggest we get to it." came the reply.


	44. Chapter 44

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, we are not into the showdown QUITE yet. However, the tension is building in the bullpen. Everyone is anxious. There is much needing done in preparation… all the while knowing that Iosif now has Callen and his father…**

 **I polished this chapter up a bit in preparation for what I have working in the other chapters now. Not much will change from what I originally planned… just digging a bit deeper into the mission detail itself. That said, you get another chapter today. I do hope you like it. As I said, I have read it several times but tweaked as I went soooooo hopefully I didn't miss any mistakes, I hate when that happens. It's a pain to clean up. HA. You know the drill… when you finish reading, won't you please stop in and give me your thoughts on how it went? Thank you to all the new reviewers, followers and favoriters. (I am making that a word. 12) You make my day! Thank you!**

For the next two hours they planned and prepared. As they finished and approved the last of their plan, Hetty insisted everyone go and get some sleep and something to eat before meeting back at the OSP. Eliot wasn't happy but knew that for the best possibly outcome, they all needed to be fresh and have their wits about them.

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Callen had lost track of time. He had no clue as to how long he had been there, no idea of whether it was day or night. He hadn't had something to eat or drink since he had been taken. Iosif had finally given him time to rest. The onslaught had been quick and full of anger and vengeance.

Victor had realized that once again Callen allowed his friend to walk. He also realized he'd followed up on every job he'd been given… when it had become apparent someone had been looking into his business dealings, he realized it was most likely Callen. Iosif had made it clear that he wanted time with the man and so on a mission designed to go wrong, Iosif was there to take advantage.

The man wasted no time picking up where they had left off. As of now, he had more bruised ribs than not. He'd been tasered repeatedly. He was pretty sure he had no less than a moderate concussion though by the dizziness and headache and nausea he was experiencing, it was likely to be considered more severe. The cuts and bruises would be too numerous to count.

He had hoped to push the man enough to finish the job rather than drag out the inevitable but Iosif was patient when it came to torture… Callen was equally patient and stubborn. He had no intention of giving in to this monster's joy of hearing his victims scream in pain or beg for mercy. Callen didn't believe himself to be a victim any more than he felt he deserved the mercy… so he would take what was thrown at him but he wasn't going to make it easy on anyone.

He hoped, by now, that Eliot had figured it all out and would be planning Iosif Romanoff's death. It was this very thing he wrapped his thoughts around as he allowed himself a few unguarded moments of sleep.

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Anxiously, everyone made their way back to the OSP. Meeting in the armory to prepare for the battle ahead, it was more than obvious that everyone was on edge and the many different personalities were beginning to conflict. It didn't help that it was becoming very evident that they were being watched. "Did anyone else have to lose a tail before getting back here?" Deeks asked the group when he and Kensi had entered the armory earlier.

"Yes, and whoever it was, was aggressive… when they realized I was onto them, they attempted to run us off the road at least twice!" Sam growled angrily, "I'm about sick of dealing with these people."

"Alright, so it's settled. We know the plan. We're going in." Eliot said sharply as he tucked his weapon into the holster at his lower back and checking the many knives he had tucked away on his body elsewhere. He noticed that he wasn't the only one who knew how to fight with a knife. He had noticed more than once as Kensi was working out in the gym that she was practicing with knives. It was an impressive sight.

"Thought you didn't like guns, Spencer" Sam stated sarcastically.

Eliot shot a look Sam's direction and noticing his remarks were more informative than confrontational, he relaxed slightly in his answer but answered in kind, "I'm not a fan. In most situations I find I can handle the issue with my hands or a knife, if necessary… but I'm not stupid. I may not like them, but I know how to use them… keep that in mind."

Looking to Ziva and casting a glance toward Gibbs, he continued, "Let me make myself clear, you shoot… you shoot to kill. The only ones we need alive is Callen and his dad. The rest dies. You comfortable with that?"

Sam, Deeks, and Kensi knew who he was speaking to. Of everyone present they were the least experienced with missions where they were told to act in only the interest of the victim and with no thought to the life of the captor. It wasn't that they didn't understand. In their field it was simply part of the training. You will, from time to time have to kill someone. Sam's military training dealt with the concept even more so. Knowing it was very likely to be a case where it came down to him or his aggressor and he would need to be willing to kill.

"We get it, Spencer. We know what is at stake!" Sam growled.

"Let's take a break, shall we?" Hetty encouraged in an attempt to defuse some of the tension emanating from all concerned.

"Fine. Meet back in the bullpen in twenty." Gibbs agreed.

Eliot stalked off, followed by Ziva. Sam and the rest of the team plus Hardison and Parker headed down to the gym leaving Gibbs, Hetty and Marie headed for the Ops center with Nate and Sophie.

"This is quite the set up." Sophie stated softly, "But will it be enough to bring this less than united group back home?"

"It is quite handy in our line of work. Normally, you would not be allowed in. However, these are by no means normal circumstances," Hetty explained, "as for whether it will be what brings them home… no… what will bring them home is the very thing that unites them… Mr. Callen.

"Understood. I have to say, it's been quite an eye opener." Nate replied, "I've seen Eliot frustrated and angry but never as intense as this… He is always in control and maybe just a little impatient… but always in control. It's been very enlightening."

"He reminds me so much of Mr. Callen." Hetty said with a small chuckle.

"No kidding. I can't imagine what the two of them could be capable of." Gibbs laughed, though the humor never reached his eyes to replace the intense concern to be found there.

"It is the fault of Blackguard and Victor. The only reason these two men survived is because they lived lives the others did not. In the end, those who died, died because they ultimately could not do what was required of them and it either caused them to leave someone go that they shouldn't have, creating an incident or it broke them and they ran… creating a possible intelligence breach and they couldn't afford that. Blackguard works in the shadows. The great CIA black ops that works above any and all and fascinates the conspiracy theorists worldwide." Hetty stated.

"Callen and his unfortunate upbringing, entirely orchestrated by the powers that be at the time and Eliot, whose mother died at the hands of her handler leaving her young son to the mercy of an angry and despondent father. Both so young and easily manipulated and trained without ever being any the wiser." Marie spoke, her voice thick with emotion full of anger and resentment, "It is only because of the influence they encountered here with these two teams that they were able to find a new path. They both possess a kind and caring soul… a conscience that both motivates and tortures them. Their lives will never be carefree. They need these two teams, these two families to truly embrace them despite what you have now learned about them. I dare say, Callen's team has a rougher road ahead of them than Eliot's considering recent and most notably past events."

The room fell silent. There was nothing to add and nothing to argue.

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Having noticed Eliot pounding on the punching bag. The team diverted to the bullpen.

Sam sat at his desk just staring at his partner's empty one. Kensi sat quietly in her own seat, chewing her nails… It was a habit that had always driven Callen crazy, sitting next to her. Deeks paced the floor. Nell, Eric, and Hardison sat on the couch typing away on their tablets. Meanwhile Parker found a place to perch, watching carefully all those around her.

"I don't get it. I mean I do but… we know we may have to use our guns and as a trained sniper, I may have to take out a target… but to go in fully aware that we are to kill EVERYONE in our path regardless… am I the only one bothered by this?" Kensi said, breaking the silence, drawing everyone from their reverie, "I mean, besides Romania when we went to save Hetty… and a few other cases where it was necessary, I have only been give A target to go after. This time…"

"No, you're not." Deeks agreed, "I was taught to shoot only if lives were endangered and only with intent to stop. Killing someone was always as a last resort."

Sam finally acknowledged those around them, "Careful what you say, my kids are here somewhere."

"They're in a meeting room upstairs, watching movies." Nell assured him as she tapped her tablet to let him know she was watching.

With a nod of appreciation, he finally spoke, "In the military you are faced with the reality of you verses them… and sometimes 'them' meant many. I just never realized that would be asked of me here. Stupid, I guess. I mean, come on. When you consider everything we have come up against? This isn't like it's our first time out in the field, guys. We have killed a lot of bad guys in the years we have worked together. It's just one thing to go in expecting resistance that may require gunfire but the expectation that we shoot first and shoot purposely to kill? Yeah, it's cold, man. I mean, I get it… I don't like it… but I get it." Sam finished as the others nodded in agreement.

"This is how they live… all of them. No one but us flinched at the thought." Nell stated. "Hetty, Gibbs, Marie, Ziva… they all seemed comfortable with it."

"Resigned… maybe… but not comfortable." Sam replied, "There's a difference. It's what separates us from the bad guys. They have a conscience they must answer to at the end of the day."

"Callen and Eliot?" Deeks asked.

"What about them?" Sam replied.

"Comfortable or resigned?" Deeks returned.

"Resigned", came the reply as Ziva joined them.

"Really?" Sam asked. There was no malice in his voice only weariness and uncertainty.

"You doubt me." Ziva replied quietly, a small smile played at her lips.

"We've just watched him spend the past four years of his life, killing people for a living… a job he chose to do. Regardless of how he felt about us, he could have chosen any other agency but he chose to be a Renegade. Why?"

"That is a question for Callen. However, until things fell apart here, he had avoided their offers for years," she replied.

Sam sighed… he hated the fact that she was right. Victor and Blackguard had manipulated so much of Callen's life in order to control him… except… except for their reaction to Callen's behavior on that one mission… their lack of trust and loyalty in their friend and leader.

Ziva sighed and looked around the bullpen, "Consider this as you reconcile your order to kill, Callen and his father WILL die if we do nothing. Those who hold him, will not stop there. They have a LONG history of this type of behavior… and worse. You are all now on their radar. What has happened to Callen, Eliot and all those others on the list… will continue if you do not follow orders today. This is not revenge killing. This is necessity… for the greater good of all agents who put their lives on the line every day and in doing so, that of their families."

"We have to get him back." Deeks stated firmly.

"We need to bring him home." Kensi agreed.

"I need to go talk to my kids before we go." Sam responded, walking out of the bullpen determined and ready to bring his partner home…


	45. Chapter 45

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: A new chapter ready to go! Nerves are frayed and they are ready to rumble. But first, they have a few more people ready to help. It's going to get crazy… but not JUST yet. I have some serious thinking to do before I just turn them loose. So, I hope you enjoy this chapter and be sure to read the notes at the bottom. I look forward to hearing what you think… What an amazing cast of characters!**

By the time Sam returned, everyone had found their way back to the bullpen and were waiting on him.

"Okay, are there any questions?" Hetty asked the assembled group. When no one spoke, she continued. "Very well, during our break, I took the privilege of reaching out to Arkady. I asked him earlier if he would contact several people for back up. They have been a part of this story for a very long time and have good reason to be involved now."

"Like who?" Gibbs asked.

"A.J. Chegwidden, Arkady Kolchek, Anna Kolchek, Tuhon… all felt compelled to help our Mr. Callen. Arkady has gathered several others from the old days… agents sworn to help protect Clara Callen and Nikita Resnikov's children. They will arrive shortly." Hetty replied.

"I would not have suspected so many people coming to help a man who, when you speak with him… is so determined to be alone." Sophie stated.

"Yes, Callen has a penchant for playing the lone wolf." Gibbs agreed.

"That is because, Mr. Callen doesn't see himself as being appreciated for who he is. He doesn't believe for a moment that he'd be wanted by anyone for anything other than what he can do for them." Hetty explained, and now we know why."

"It's hard to see your worth when all you see in the mirror is a monster." Ziva added. It was, perhaps, a curse carried by anyone who did the work which was required of Callen, Eliot and herself.

"He's not a monster," Parker spoke up from her perch.

"We know that." Eric assured her.

"Doesn't matter what we think if everyone else around him thinks otherwise…" Eliot growled.

"Enough!" Hetty shouted, "If we are to stand any chance at saving Mr. Callen from Iosif Romanoff and perhaps even himself… then we need to be united. This bickering must come to an end before you leave here."

"Hetty is correct. We accomplish nothing this way. The one thing we have in common is Callen. That's all that is important for now." Ziva agreed.

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The wait seemed interminable before Arkady and the rest of the backup arrived. Little else was spoken during the wait but by the time introductions were through, they were more than ready for what lay ahead.

"Henrietta, this Iosif is one mean bastard. I've heard of him. Are we certain Callen is even still alive?" AJ asked.

"We are not… but we need to make sure one way or the other. Regardless, we must see to it this man never has the opportunity to hurt another soul." Hetty replied.

"Then let's get moving. The sooner we get there, the better." Tuhon responded.

"Where, exactly, is this Iosif holding Callen and his father?" AJ enquired, "I think you need to do some updating on the plan with those of us who are just joining in."

"The man makes a good point. What exactly are we walking into? Do we have numbers?" Tuhon asked.

"Yes, yes, you are correct. I am afraid we have all been waiting for what seems an eternity to get moving on this… I am certain they can update you along the way but let's cover a few basics here, shall we Mr. Beale? Miss Jones?" Hetty turned to the others.

"Callen had, I'm assuming, implanted a tracker somewhere on himself so that we might be able to find him once he let himself be turned over to Iosif Romanoff." Eric began.

"Wait! He turned himself OVER to this guy? What the hell for?" AJ stated gruffly.

"Please AJ, I understand your feelings… however, there was a method to his madness." Hetty assured.

"Yeah, well over the years, I have noticed his methods ARE madness. I would have thought you could have tamed some of his urges to throw himself on the tracks, for crying out loud!" AJ stated, no less reassured and causing a chuckle to pass amongst those present who had been charged with his safety for so many years.

"ANYWAY… Eric interrupted. Callen had created a code which we would use to connect to his tracker. We only just received the last piece. Once we had that we were able to track down exactly where he is being held."

"Where?" Tuhon asked, shortly.

Nell, smiled at Eric as she took over, "Callen is being held at Cerro Gordo. It's an old silver mining town. They mined silver and sent it back east. It has great historical significance to Los Angeles, actually. It used to be open to the public until it was purchased…" Nell noticed the less than interested and more notably angry faces waiting for her to continue with the case information, "Sorry. The mine was purchased about three and a half years ago by none other than Iosif Romanoff under the name of "Viitorul International". It is a 300-acre mining town. Lots of buildings… mountainous range… and from what we were able to get over satellite was that in the past four years he has built up quite the compound. As for numbers? Uncertain… but knowing Iosif and Victor, they will be on alert for anyone who might try saving Agent Callen."

"Great, so nothing simple as going in and grabbing the kid… sounds about right." AJ replied sarcastically, rolling his eyes with a sigh.

"Just like old times, don't you think, Henrietta Lange?" Arkady grinned.

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Cars loaded with ammo and weapons, as well as, vests and other supplies, they headed toward their destination. It was a four-hour commute yet there was little to no communication between cars as each person was lost to their own thoughts.

An alliance had been formed between these two generations of agents and spies. Each generation had fought their own set of battles in this war… none harder than the man they fought to save and the man now leading them. But today they combined their strength and knowledge to win not just a battle but this one was for the war.

Sam thought about this unlikely group of people… all hell bent on saving a man who no longer wanted to be saved. To stop an evil that was set to destroy the lives of so many. They had no clue what they might find but if it was one thing he had learned from G Callen, it was that when it came to family, it didn't matter. If one of your own was in danger nothing should stand in your way of saving them and rules be hanged. He only hoped they would find them both alive when they got there.

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The splash of cold water left him sputtering and choking his way back to awareness. He had hoped for more time to recover and prepare himself before Iosif came back but the man obviously had an agenda. This was payback for what had happened in Romania.

Intent on refusing the urge to scream from the pain being inflicted on him, he had earned himself several more electrical burns before finally passing out.

Still, he remained tied with his arms above his head, pulled so tight he was convinced his shoulders might actually dislocate.

"Agent Callen, welcome back!" Iosif greeted just a little too sweetly for his taste.

"It's not by choice, I assure you. You won't get many stars for hospitality." Callen managed a smirk.

"Well, now, Let's just see what we can do about that. What if I were to tell you I had a surprise for you?" Iosif sneered as he motioned to the guard, "I like my visitors to feel at home. Of course, not having had a real home, you wouldn't quite know what to expect, now would you? Then again, you had 37 placements… not really homes since none of them wanted you. So, I got to thinking, what made each of those places so special. I hope you don't mind that I looked at your records." His smile held no warmth.

Callen's eyes narrowed. He was growing very tired of his records being used against him. If he happened to survive this, and that was truly a big if, he would have to see to it they never saw the light of day again. No one would ever have access to his life story… not and use it against him.

"I saw that one thing which was quite popular in almost all your placements was whippings. So as not to disappoint, I have dusted off my old whip, yeah?"

Callen couldn't stop the shudder that ran through him as he attempted to gain control of his breathing in an effort to prepare himself for what he knew was coming.

"Before we start, however, nothing makes us feel at home quite like family." He offered.

"Well then, I guess we are both going to be disappointed because I have no family." Callen replied.

"Oh, come now, you found your father in recent years, did you not?" Iosif taunted as he played with the whip, he now held in his hands letting it drag across the floor before rolling it up in preparation for his next phase of torture.

"Let me rephrase… no family that actually cares." Callen reiterated, his eyes never leaving the whip.

As he spoke, the guards walked in dragging Garrison between them. When Callen saw his father, he knew it was only going to get worse. He couldn't stop the anger that welled up over the fact that his father had vanished and remained in the wind until now. Why should he care what happened to him? It was clear his father had no concern for him. He watched as the guards roughly secured him to the chair by his hands and legs afterward placing his bare feet in a basin of water. He quickly looked his father over. He looked exhausted and weak, like an old man. Other than a few cuts and bruises on his face, there was little else to indicate any type of physical abuse up to this point. It was apparent that this was about to change. Only then did he dare look into the eyes of the man across from him.

Garrison returned his look of anger and distrust with one of sorrow and remorse.

"Aren't you going to say hello to one another? I know it has been a long time. I would think you would have much to catch up on," Iosif goaded the two. "That is a shame… and rude. After all that I went through to bring you back together. I would think you would show me a little appreciation… It's too bad you didn't stick around long enough to teach your son some manners. But then, I guess the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, eh Nikita, my old friend. It is no wonder they had to punish him so often in these homes. He deserved it."

Unprepared for the quick assault as Iosif cracked the whip against his back, removing the skin as he pulled away, Callen barely had time to catch his breath only to feel it come down again. He grunted against the pain never taking his eyes off his father.

Nikita watched helplessly as the man railed against his son both physically and mentally.

After the third strike, Iosif walked around in front of Callen, "What an embarrassment you are to your father and your dead mother. It is a good thing she never lived to see what a disappointment you turned out to be. To think, Victor and the rest of Blackguard thought you to be a prodigy? What a waste. What kind of agent would allow themselves to be trapped not once, not twice but three times by the same person? Perhaps the fault is not yours alone, but your father's. Perhaps he is the one we should be punishing." Iosif stated as he motioned once more to the guards standing over Nikita.

Callen watched his father convulse as the electrical current coursed through his body. Despite his anger toward his father, he could not stand by without attempting to do something, "STOP, STOP! Leave him alone!" he yelled as loudly as his bruised ribs would allow.

"He speaks!" Iosif laughed, "Maybe not all is lost, old man!"

Iosif then turned his evil grin onto Callen tauntingly before raising the whip against him once more, allowing it to slice a path across his shoulder and chest.

"Ostav' moyego syna v pokoye!" Nikita yelled on the second strike of the whip which tore through his chest and stomach.

Callen felt his legs give way and the pull on his already aching shoulders and wrists as they now held the entirety of his weight. Iosif prepared to revel in the moment of Callen's true defeat… the moment when the pain and fatigue became too much and finally, he could no longer hold back the cry of agony. But just as he let the whip fly once more, any such cry was muffled by the sound of gun fire and yelling.

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Translation: "Leave my son alone!"**

 **Now, I have to say the next several chapters are going to be a few days away. I really feel the need to rethink a few things. They have played on my nerves since I finished writing them and I haven't felt like they were quite up to par. I'm not changing any directions from where I was taking it so I won't have to mess with ALLLLLL the chapters ahead, just a few. Still, it's the mission chapters and we all know how intimidating those can be… They terrify me! So, forgive me for stepping back and doing a little further research before I finalize these few chapters… I only pray I can do justice to all the wonderful praise you have given me along the way, thus far. Thank you again for all the wonderful reviews and messages. The box is right down there… feel free to stop in and say hello and let me know what you think of the new characters! Hetty made sure that Callen would always have back up if needed, did she not? See you soon!**


	46. Chapter 46

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: HELLO! Well, it took a wee bit longer than I intended but I think I have it as polished as this particular mission can be. Please keep in mind that I am very very new to writing these kinds of scenes. I did my best. I pray it does not disappoint. Please do me a favor and send me a review after to read these next several chapters and let me know what you think. Constructive criticism would be preferred to meanness. LOL What started as two chapters has now become four… hope you won't mind a few extra chapters. Enjoy.**

Iosif spun around. Leaving the room with a gun in hand, "We are not finished, Agent Callen."

"Moy syn!" Nikita yelled, trying to get Callen's attention.

"Vy ne imeyete prava nazyvat' menya svoim synom!" Callen spat angrily as he worked to slow his breathing and control the pain.

"I am sorry. I did what I did to protect you." Garrison spoke sadly.

"And how has that worked out for you because I gotta tell you, old man, it isn't working for me."

"I am sorry."

"So… you keep… saying… now shut up." Callen let out a pained sigh as he passed out.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === FOUR HOURS EARLIER === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

As the rescue teams headed for their destination, those left behind had work of their own to do. Nate and Sophie joined Hetty for a brief cup of tea to calm the nerves as they faced what was sure to be a long night ahead.

"Whew. I have to say, if this is what you do on a daily basis, Miss Lange, I don't know how you stay sane." Sophie stated, accepting the offered tea.

Hetty looked over at the woman in amusement. "Some might argue whether I am at all sane."

"My guess is, you walk a tightrope working with this group. There is no doubt, they know what they are doing… but the intensity of emotion here." Nate remarked as he took a sip.

"Oh, it is the nature of the beast, I fear. They face some of the most extreme of circumstances and most times they handle it admirably… until it involves one of our own. The past five years have taken their toll. We made our mistakes at the onset but we have fought to save Mr. Callen from himself continuously ever sense. I must agree however, they are an interesting group of individuals. I had that conversation with our team psychologist over a different pot of tea following another rough mission. Regardless of their individual personalities and quirks… when they come together, they are a powerhouse of intellect, brawn, and physical talent the likes of which has not been found in any other agency. I am proud of what they have become… despite recent events." Hetty smiled, breathing in the steam from her cup.

"This tea is exquisite!" Sophie exclaimed, "I don't know that I have ever tasted the like."

Hetty smiled as she placed her cup on its saucer. She was quite proud of her tea selection. She had friends, Callen included, who would buy her teas from around the world. She chuckled at how the team believed their leader to be so out of touch when it came to the complexities of food and drink… but she knew better. He knew how to savor the taste of a good scotch, how to appreciate the essence and flavor of each tea. It was something she enjoyed about their visits. It became a game between them. She would make a tea and he would eventually be able to tell her what exotic tea she was serving, where it came from and what flavors she had infused with it. Some were easier than others but she rarely stumped him.

"This is a rare tea… guayusa… it is found in the Amazon Rainforest of Ecuador, produced from the leaves of a holly tree. Interestingly enough, next to coffee, it contains the second highest amounts of caffeine. However, along with the obvious burst of energy it will ultimately provide, it also contains high amounts of anti-oxidants, balances the body's pH and blood sugar levels as well as helps to keep your blood pressure down. This particular pot has been infused with Peach. I find it quite refreshing. It gives you a much-needed boost of energy while allowing you to remain calm. I thought this the perfect occasion for such a tea as this.

"You are well versed in your tea, aren't you?" Nate stated casting a raised brown in Sophie's direction.

"Doing what we do here… I find that one should submerse oneself in those things they find relaxing."

"Can't argue with that." He replied honestly.

"You used to drink quite heavily in the past… what is your choice of beverage now, Mr. Ford?"

"You really do your homework, don't you?" His tone held the slightest bit of anger.

"It is my job, Mr. Ford, to know who it is that is crossing the threshold of my home." Hetty replied smugly.

"Fair enough… Yes, I used to drink… it calmed me." He replied in kind.

"I doubt it calmed you so much as it numbed you… but go on." Hetty looked at him knowingly.

"Yes, that's probably true. Is there anything you don't know about my life? Don't answer that. In response to your question however, tea, coffee… Nothing quite like this, I have to say."

"A shame. That stuff you buy in the store is not real tea, Mr. Ford… It is scrap, wrapped in paper. But as I told a friend once, our journeys must all begin somewhere. Now, I am afraid we must get back to the matter at hand. It will not be long before our people reach their destination and we must be prepared to have their backs. I worry we have not given Mr. Beale and company quite enough time to prepare." Hetty stated as she rose to lead them back to the Ops Center where the rest of the home team was busy trying to find cameras and satellite access to help the teams on the ground find their way in.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

"Eliot needs us to be there… we need to be there… I'm going." Parker argued.

"Parker, no!" Hardison yelled.

"You can't stop me!" Parker yelled back.

"Eliot has a good team with him, he's going to be fine." Eric attempted to appease the young woman.

"But they aren't HIS team. We are! He's going to a ghost town!" Parker replied, "Sparky needs us!" She jumped up and headed for the door when Hardison grabbed her.

Nell turned just in time to see the two men wrestling the young woman to the floor. Legs and arms flying in all directions had her holding her stomach laughing until Hardison grabbed the duct tape Eric had pulled out of the desk. It was then that she jumped up and headed for the door.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

As Hetty, Sophie and Nate approached the top of the steps to the landing just outside the Ops center, they could hear the sounds of a scuffle. Hetty led the way into the room only to be stopped in the doorway by an unexpected sight.

Nell looked back at the pile of individuals behind her and then back to Hetty.

"Miss Jones?" Hetty asked, her voice laced with annoyance and her visage, one of lost patience.

"Don't look at me, I had NOTHING to do with this." Nell replied as she spun on her heel and walked back to her monitor. Hetty turned her gaze onto Eric.

"What in the name of all that is holy is going on here, Mr. Beale?" Hetty screeched as they stared down at Parker who sat kicking, tugging and pulling to loosen her arms and legs from their restraints. Even though her mouth was taped shut her eyes spoke volumes.

Hardison and Eric exchanged looks as Hardison put the duct tape he was holding behind his back.

"Ummm. Well, you see," Hardison stammered.

"Hetty, she was upset that Eliot wouldn't let her go and help and she was bound and determined she was going to follow," Eric started.

"And we didn't want her to leave soooo, we duct taped her to the desk." Hardison finished.

Hetty just stared at the two men and then at the young woman sitting less than contentedly on the floor covered in duct tape. She turned to find Sophie and Nate equally at a loss for words…

"While I appreciate your wish to keep our Miss Parker safe… we cannot go around duct taping people to the furniture. It is uncouth. Now, Mr. Beale, if you would be so kind as to release our guest… we have work to do.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

They chose to park off the beaten path and hike their way in. The daylight was growing short and dressed in their fatigues, they easily blended with the lengthening shadows of the landscape around them.

As they neared the famed ghost town, they found a spot where they could stop and rest as they planned their next move.

"Eliot… why don't I take Agents Blye and David and we will go patrol the area." Gibbs offered.

"Good idea. I want both you and Blye to find yourselves places to perch. We need coverage from above. The more you take out from on high, the better chance the rest of us have of making it through the compound." Eliot agreed, "Ziva, meet back here in thirty."

"On it." Gibbs replied as Ziva confirmed with a nod.

Eliot watched as they headed out. "I suggest everyone rest up. As soon as it gets dark, we're going in." Eliot advised.

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: OOOOOOOOHHHHHHH! I know, I know. I have left you waiting yet again... it's coming. Now, what do you think? The box is right down there... go ahead, stop by and say hi! Thank you for all the encouraging notes as I worked on these chapters... it kept me moving through the frustration. YOU ARE ALL THE BEST READERS EVER!**

 **TRANSLATION** **: "My son"**

 **"You have no right to call me your son!"**


	47. Chapter 47

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hey everyone! WOW! Got a few responses today. HA. Yes, imagine that! Gibbs taking orders from someone else. To be fair, not his first time.** **Hangten33** **, you are correct. Rule 38 is in play!** **Knirbenrots** **, sorry… I knew more than a few would be upset that they had to wait yet again. HA and yeah, I had to laugh… "instead we learn how Sophie likes Hetty's tea." HAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh my goodness. I thought the same thing as I was reading it back and I asked my daughter who does my read throughs if it was mean… she told me to leave it in! LOL But seriously, they are facing a long night of worry and danger. They needed a little moment to catch their breath and prepare mentally while everyone else did their job preparing physically.** **Countrygirluk56** **, hang on just a little longer. I warned you the road would be bumpy but I would put everything back as it should be… or some semblance… HA. I just don't take to the whole "fix a problem in 30 minutes or in this case a few chapters." Although this sucker took on a life of it's own…. Well, please, read on and, as always, please let me know what your think when you are done. THANK YOU THANK YOU TO ALL THOSE THAT DO! Okay, catch you on the other end.** **NOTE::::** **Any weird spelling errors at this point are to be blamed on my kitten, Salem. He just jumped up onto the keyboard and ran across it. I think I got it all but ... sigh**

They sat quietly as they prepared themselves mentally for the battle to come and wondering what they would find when they reached their destination.

Eliot watched each individual carefully. He could see the strain the past several years had caused. He saw the worry creeping in as to what might be the end result once they found their way into the building. He hoped the fight would be a quick one with few casualties on their side… Callen included. However, their team was made up of as many older players as not. He had read up on everything he could find on these people with Eric and Hardison's help. They were an impressive bunch… intense and not to be taken lightly.

"Look kid, if you're sitting over there concerned that we old folk can't keep up… don't be. Let me tell you something. I had already been through one war before you were even out of diapers." AJ Chegwidden stated evenly.

Eliot's stare bore into the man across from him before he let a genuine smile spread across his face, "I'm well aware of your career. Impressive. Your list of awards alone…"

"Awards! This isn't about awards and pats on the back! It's about kicking ass and getting a job done. You aren't the only one to do their homework. Hell son, I've been well aware of yours and Callen's shenanigans for years." AJ grinned at the wary look on Eliot's face.

Deeks let out a laugh and opened his mouth to speak when Eliot put his hand up, "Shut. Up."

"I didn't even say anything yet." He replied innocently.

"Don't care. Shut up." Eliot repeated with a smirk that caused the other to laugh as well.

"Well, I, for one would love to hear more about these shenanigans" Anna spoke up, relieved by the tension that had been released because of the light moment.

AJ chuckled before growing sober once more, "That's a conversation for another day. First, we save Callen and his father."

"Okay, so how are we going forward?" Sam asked, "you're the one calling the shots."

Eliot looked to the man next to him and with a nod of understanding, "Kensi and Gibbs will lead from above. The more they take out prior to our approach the better the number… which I predict will be high."

Eliot began to draw on the ground a rough outline of what they knew about the compound, "Now, as I said…"

Ziva rejoined the group, sitting down next to Eliot.

"Well?" he asked.

"They have found their… perch?" she responded, questioning the term used.

"Good. I assume they have their earwigs in?" Eliot stated as the group, in unison, inserted their own.

"No, Spencer, we're just winging it from here," Gibbs grumbled.

Eliot grinned along with the others as he moved forward with his instructions.

"Eric, are you there?" he asked.

"Mr. Spencer, we have you all connected. I take it you made it there safely." Hetty asked.

"Nothing we couldn't handle." Eliot replied, thinking back to the company they had picked up on their way out of town. It took a little doing but they managed to take care of them. Between their multiple vehicles they managed to run them off the road while Arkady sent some of his men back to deal with them. It was worth the loss of men just to know that there would be no evidence once they were done.

"That is good to hear. Did Arkady have to send all his men back?" she asked knowingly.

Eliot shot a look around the group. "No… we still have several… but how…" he started to ask as he looked to Sam who simply shrugged and shook his head.

"Mr. Spencer, is everyone prepared to move ahead?" Hetty asked.

"We are… Do we have cameras or sound yet?" He asked in return.

"Not as yet, but they are working diligently," Hetty stated as she saw Eric's shoulders tense from the stress.

"This place is huge!" Kensi remarked.

"We're working on it, guys, I swear!" Eric replied, "We are getting close, but they have jammers in place that are complicating things."

"With a place this big, we are bound to be out numbered. We can't afford to move forward completely blind!" Gibbs growled.

"He is right. We are bound to be spotted if we don't move soon," Tuhon added.

"Look!" Eric threw back, "We're doing the best we can under the circumstances! You're sounding garbled and until we break through the barriers… It's one thing to find the location, take pictures from a satellite but breaking their security and accessing their cameras…" he trailed off…

Eliot could hear the strain in the man's voice. "Eric!" He nearly shouted in order to get his attention. When things quieted, he proceeded "Callen has told me repeatedly just how good you are. It was one of the things he missed when he was out there on his own. He said that even though he could do what needed done, he missed having you and Nell there to take the load off. Now come on, Eric, you broke the Internet, man! You've got this. If Callen believes in you, so do I."

The coms fell silent for a moment. Eric looked over at Nell who was beaming with pride for her friend. He returned her smile as he pushed his glasses back where they belonged and turned his gaze back to his screen.

Hetty couldn't help but smile at the thought that Callen and truly missed the team while he was away… that during their time together, he had grown to appreciate the purpose of being a member of a team. Now, if only they could get him to admit that when they finally got him back… she prayed they got him back.

"Give me ten more minutes" Eric answered with confidence that hadn't been there before.

"Ten minutes? You got it." Eliot agreed, "While he takes care of this, let's talk logistics. According to what we know so far, in order to gain access to the compound, at least some of us will have to pass through the old town first. That's at least a dozen buildings we will have to clear before we even reach the compound.

"Arkady, you take your goons and go around back. We need coverage from all angles…"

"What is this you say… goons? You call my men goons? I am insulted. Those goons already saved you your dirty work. They have come for Callen like all of you." Arkady huffed, garnering him eyerolls from everyone around him.

"They came because you ordered and paid them to, Arkady… not quite the same." Anna returned.

"Bah! You make sound like this is a bad thing… Callen is like son to me. They protect my interests. You will be glad they come." Arkady retorted with his eye brows raised.

Eliot looked the man over as if debating something before letting it go and continuing on, causing Arkady to chuckle. "Whatever, Anna, Chegwidden, you go with Arkady… keep an eye on them." He growled as Arkady shook his head but remained silent. "Once you clear the way to enter the rear of the building let me know. AJ grinned with understanding at Eliot's request. He had known Arkady for a long time and the man had always proved to be handy but he also played by a very different set of rules than the rest of them… with the exception, perhaps, of one G Callen.

That leaves Deeks, Ziva, Tuhon, Sam and myself to clear the buildings. Once we do that, I will alert you when we are ready to proceed onward. Until then you will all sit tight." Eliot looked around the group before letting his eyes settle on Marie Pavlenko.

"Marie, you need to stay here. Callen would kill me if I let anything happen to you. You are still recovering from your gunshot wound." he explained, sympathetically.

"I am not weak!" she replied angrily, "but… I will do as you say."

She said one thing, but Eliot could tell by the look in her eye that she had no plan of doing any such thing. However, he would take what he got at the moment.

"The compound is a basic U shape," Gibbs began explaining, "consisting of three 2-story buildings. The largest of the three being at the rear. My guess is, we'll find Callen and his father there."

"Gibbs is right… and the entire place is tight… although the most visible protection would be the guards found on the other two buildings…" Kensi confirmed.

"How many guards do you see?" Sam asked.

"Four patrols on each of the upper balconies. Blye and myself will take care of them first." Gibbs reported.

"Right and there are at least that many on the ground. There's no telling how many are inside. Gibbs and I will do our best to help from here as long as we can." Kensi added.

"Once we head into the compound, Ziva, you and Deeks split off and cover the side buildings. Sam… you, Tuhon, and I are all strong at hand to hand combat. We'll be heading down the center courtyard. With any luck, we will all make it to the main building. From there, there is only one goal."

"Get to Callen." Ziva responded adamantly.

A grunt of approval rippled through the group. "It's a plan." Deeks murmured to himself.

"You got a better idea?" Eliot asked, his voice hardened.

"Wha… Uh… no, just… Hey Eric? How's it going over there? You have anything for us?" Deeks all but pleaded as Eliot smirked over his uneasiness. Deeks made him laugh. He understood why Callen liked the guy. He also understood what frustrated him about the man.

"NO!" Eric shouted.

Everyone winced at the response, "There is no need to yell, Mr. Beale, we can hear quite clearly." Hetty stated firmly.

"Or at least we did…" Deeks mumbled, shaking his head dramatically.

"AS. I. Said. We are ALL able to hear without trouble, Mr. Deeks." Hetty repeated sharply.

"Got it. Sorry. My bad." He replied sheepishly.

"Everyone needs to get their heads in the game." AJ ordered, "There is a lot at stake here. We have no idea what we are up against or what we will find once we reach that building. We need to be prepared for anything."

"He's right." Sam agreed, "and we have yet to confirm if, in fact, Iosif or Victor are here. I mean, just because Callen appears to be here, doesn't mean they are."

"He's got a point." Anna stated, "There's plenty of guards, but you would think, if they're in the center building, he'd have that more heavily guarded, would you not?"

"You don't know Iosif like I do. He's cocky but he's not stupid. He has protection. Just because you can't see it, doesn't mean it isn't there." Eliot warned, "When we go in there… be on alert at all times. As I have said in the past, the man is sadistic. There is no telling what he has planned. I'm surprised Callen didn't have a warning sign for that as well." Eliot spoke the last sentence more to himself than the others raising more than a few brows in question.

"Okay, man, I hope you're right and Eric, I sure as hell hope you are making progress on your end. I will feel much safer going forward with eyes on the inside." Sam advised.

"I am, Sam." Eric replied quietly.

"Henrietta, you have done this group a disservice. We used to go in with no idea what we were walking into… but we had a sixth sense that kept us alive. They are too dependent on your computers." AJ grumbled.

"Yes, AJ, we did. However, this team has the ADDED protection of Mr. Beale and Miss Jones here to help guide them whenever necessary… but their gut instinct… their sixth sense, as you call it, has never failed them yet." Hetty countered in defense.

Just then, the distinct sound of gunfire could be heard over the coms.


	48. Chapter 48

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi there! Well, we're in it now! I know you are getting anxious and I know you are losing faith in whether or not I will be able to patch up the mess I have made with the team… but hang in there. We have much to do before we say good-bye to this particular story… I made you a promise in the beginning and, like Callen, I do not break my promises. I won't keep you. Here is the next chapter… You probably don't need me to say it, but I'm going to… PLEASE drop me a line when you are done. THANK YOU TO EVERYONE who has taken the time to leave me notes and reviews. They are all very much appreciated. I love that you feel comfortable enough to message and ask me your questions or share your concerns and ideas. I hear them all and take them to heart. You will no doubt see ideas you gave me pop up in later stories… if not here. I try to respond to everyone and if for some crazy reason I missed yours… I read it… I promise! Thank you again. BEST READERS EVER!**

"Mr. Hanna?" Hetty asked, alarmed.

"Kensi, Gibbs, what's going on in there?" Sam asked in response.

"Just some of the goons down there horsing around." Gibbs said.

"Again, with the goons…" Arkady complained.

"Wait! Gibbs, look! That's… that's him. That's Iosif!" Kensi cried.

"Well, we have confirmation. Iosif, at least, is here and we're definitely heading for that center building. I'd suggest sooner rather than later." Gibbs confirmed, concerned for his friend, whom they had yet to see.

"Okay, you all know the plan. I suggest we all get moving and get into position. Once we clear the ghost town buildings, Eric, it would be nice if you could have resolved your issues with that damned security system. You beat the Steranko, for crying out loud!" Eliot pressed as encouragingly as he could make it.

Slowly, the team split and each headed for their appropriate positions, diligently keeping watch for enemy combatants as well as cameras they needed to avoid. Eliot led the remaining members to the head of the ghost town before splitting up to search the buildings.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

"Now, where were we, Agent Callen?" Iosif asked as he re-entered the room. It was a large room containing only one window by the door to the courtyard and the only other door was the one leading to what Callen had assumed was the remainder of the building. The ceilings were high, which Iosif had informed his prisoners was for the acoustical benefits of their tortured screams. Therefore, there was little else in the room but a row of cabinets containing his 'toys' as he called them, there was a cage centered on one wall, several other implements of torture, and a chair where he would sit and watch as he allowed his captees to suffer at the hands of his men.

Iosif set his gun on the cabinet closest to where he was approaching Callen's now lifeless form. Giving a hard slap across his face, he was rewarded with the fluttering of eyelids as the wounded man came to awareness once more.

"Ah, there you are!" Iosif grabbed his face in his hand, squeezing tightly on the jawline in and effort to focus the man's attentions, "I am so sorry for the interruption. My men… they get bored and do stupid things… but you wouldn't do anything like that, now would you? You know, do stupid things, like allowing yourself to be captured, Agent G Callen?" Iosif growled in question releasing his hold roughly snapping Callen's head backward.

Callen swallowed nervously, his throat parched from lack of anything to drink in he wasn't sure how long. He forced his legs to support his weight once more. He knew that look and nothing pleasant ever came from it. He was prepared to die, that wasn't his problem. In fact, he'd welcome the release. He just figured it would be in a fair battle and not chained up like an animal for the slaughter. The thought sickened him more than the pain, which he was certain was, about to come.

Iosif walked the short distance to where Garrison remained seated. "I have a special treat for you… Nikita." Iosif's voice was laced with anger as he drew out the pronunciation of his name. "However, I am not yet finished with your insolent son."

His return to where Callen was suspended was quick and Callen was unprepared for the onslaught of punches their sadistic tormentor offered. With no warning, punch after punch drove into his ribs, his sides, and finally one aimed directly into his solar plexus, causing his legs once more to buckle under him. Making it all the more difficult to catch his breath was the jarring action which caused his already aching shoulders to once more bear the entirety of his weight.

Just as Iosif was preparing for yet another assault, his phone rang. "Catch your breath, if you can, Agent Callen. The next few hours will be painfully busy for you." He laughed as he answered the phone and headed toward the outer door.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Everyone waited as they heard them clear each building dotted with momentary scuffles followed by the dull thud as the bodies hit the floor. Finally, they were grouped at the back of the last building cleared, preparing for the next stage of their mission.

"Eric, we need you!" Sam whispered into the coms.

"Once we move forward, there will be no hiding our presence. Now what do you have, Eric?" Eliot asked.

"Allllllmost… there!" Eric answered and then fell silent for a moment before continuing.

"Eric?" Deeks called.

"Guys, all we have is video of what you are already seeing. I'm still searching but they upped their game with this system. What I need is someone on the inside." Eric replied.

"I can't afford anyone to go looking for you, sorry Eric. Get ready to move people." Eliot responded.

"I hope you know what you're doing." Sam muttered. He knew Eliot had the most feasible plan. He knew that regardless of the information they might receive from video, it wouldn't change a whole lot from what they were moving ahead with. It would just be nice to have an eye on the numbers and where they were coming from… to know that what they were fighting for was still there for the taking. Perhaps AJ was right. They had become too dependent on electronics. Callen was always one to go with his gut rather than electronic information. Despite the accuracy, Callen had predicted things in the past that Eric couldn't see through all the cameras he might find. There was a time… before losing Michelle… that Sam had been good at reading a site and getting a feel for what they were dealing with… but now he could only think of getting the job done and staying alive in the process… relying more, at times, on what Eric and Nell saw than what he felt… but Callen had learned early in life to depend solely on his own gut… and he trusted that feeling above anything else. He missed that. It gave the team an edge that they otherwise didn't have.

"Go get my boy!" Hetty stated emphatically, voicing what the team had always known. "Bring him and yourselves home safely."

"That's the plan, Hetty," Sam answered, giving Eliot the nod to proceed.

"Gibbs, Kensi, you're up." Eliot ordered.

"Wait… something is going on." Gibbs reported back.

"What do you mean… something's going on?" Eliot demanded.

"Well, I don't have ears on the ground, but whatever it is… my guess is, they're expecting company." Gibbs relayed.

Kensi also added her take on the situation, "Iosif came back out, he's on his phone. Whoever he is talking to has him very agitated. This can't be good, guys. Do you think he found out we are here?"

"Damn, how would they find out?" AJ growled, "Arkady, you said your guys took care of things…"

"They did. My men, they are very thorough. There must have been someone else… maybe these goooons…" Arkady made it a point to exaggerate the word for effect, "called someone before we took care of business, yes?"

"Doesn't change anything. We're going in… just watch your backs." Eliot barked, "I repeat… you shoot, you shoot to kill… On. Your. Go. Gibbs!"

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"It seems we have visitors. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, now would you?" Iosif growled upon re-entering the building.

Callen remained quiet… he could only wish.

"I have a surprise for them. They so much as attempt to enter this building and they will die for their efforts. I have men positioned everywhere. They will never make it this far. I am afraid it is becoming clear our time together is drawing to a close. It appears Victor has made plans for us to move on. Unfortunately, I am not allowed any pets and so I must leave you. However, as I say my good-byes, I give you one final gift. A reminder to you of those you took from me. Callen noticed the guards placing the coils around his father's chest…

"What are you doing? No, Iosif! Leave him alone. It's me you're angry with! I am the one who killed your family members. I'm the one you should be punishing… not him. Let him go!" Callen choked out between gasps.

Iosif's only response was a cold evil laugh that sent chills down Callen's spine as once more Iosif commenced with throwing several more punches… making the most of what little time he had left to torture his nemesis.


	49. Chapter 49

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Here we go! The battle… the rescue… a longer chapter. This is the chapter that scares me most. I so don't want to let you down after all this waiting! I tried… please remember that it is really my first real battle scene and there is much to be learned about writing such a scene. Please be kind in your review… It does move quickly through… a lot of scene changes… Oh, for crying out loud… just go and read it already! I can't stand it! Sigh. The box at the bottom? Please put something in it when you are done and hit the send button. I will just be sitting over here biting my nails as I await word. Ohhhhhhhhh….. breathe, breathe, breathe… go for it! I'm okay….**

Kensi and Gibbs took aim and with little effort took down the first dozen men as the rest of the teams moved in unison. Arkady ordered his men to split up and go ahead of them as Anna and AJ joined Arkady moving toward the rear of the building, being met by what felt like an unending stream of combatants.

Eliot and his team moved seamlessly through the courtyard as the guards came at them from all directions. Eliot was astounded by the way Tuhon basically plowed through his opposition and was even more taken back when he heard more than saw the knife that skimmed past his ear only to hit a would-be attacker from striking him while he had been busy dealing with another. With a quick nod of thanks, they were both back in the game. At one point, Eliot and Sam worked in tandem as they passed their attackers back and forth until they fell. When the last of their nearest enemies had fallen, they threw each other a victory grin before turning quickly to scan the rest of the area. They knew it was only a matter of time before more of Iosif's men took the place of those they had already taken down.

"Check in!" Eliot called through the com.

"Fine up here." Gibbs replied for himself and Kensi.

"A bit tied up in the back here." AJ stated, "give us a few and we should be… ARGH, Damn!"

"AJ?" Gibbs called out.

"I'm fine. It's just a graze."

"You take my Anna and head for the back door over there. My men and I will keep these goooons busy." Arkady suggested, once again emphasizing the offending word. AJ couldn't help the smirk that crossed his face as he kept an eye on their surroundings.

"Arkady, no." Anna replied.

"Go! I will be fine. I have dealt with much worse in my life than these morons. Now go! Go and get Callen away from that monster." Arkady insisted as he moved to lay ground fire so they were able to make a run for it, "GO!" he shouted as he began shooting.

Taking no more time to argue, both AJ and Anna made a run for the building stopping just short of their target and taking refuge behind a delivery truck as yet another round of gun fire was aimed their way.

Shooting continued to be heard coming throughout the side buildings as Ziva and Deeks worked their way through the two-story buildings. "Just in case you are wondering, your friendly neighborhood detective is actively using up what is left of his ammo… but looking great while doing it." He quipped.

"Good here as well," Ziva called, "but I, too, am running low."

Eliot could tell by the strain in her voice that she was not as good as she claimed. The battle was exhausting them all. "Gibbs! I need you two down here to back up Deeks and Ziva."

"Already headed their way… Agent Blye, you're with Ziva." Gibbs ordered but before she could argue, Eliot interrupted, "No, Kensi, watch your husband's back, Gibbs you get Ziva and get to the main building." Eliot remembered Callen mentioning that the only reason he never argued over the two agents marrying was because they worked well together and their relationship was rarely an issue in the field. He knew in recent months there had been a few problems but Callen and said it had been rectified and that they worked better together than apart. Eliot had his doubts but he trusted that Callen knew his people. He also knew there was a high chance of things taking a turn for the worse and he figured they needed to be together if it happened.

Eliot looked at Sam and Tuhon, "On the count of three we are moving in. AJ, you and Anna ready to enter the rear?"

"We are. Arkady will be with us shortly." Anna answered, looking back to see her father shoot down one of the last guards blocking his way. Arkady ordered his men to surround the building and moved to join his daughter.

"Good. Gibbs, I need you and Ziva to get in here as soon as you can." He ordered.

"Correction, I will be coming. Ziva has been injured." Gibbs responded.

"I will be fine, Gibbs." Ziva argued.

"What are the injuries, Jethro?" Hetty asked from home base.

"She has at least one maybe two broken ribs." Gibbs confirmed.

"You are done, Miss David. You have a long painful ride back and we can not risk you getting hurt any worse."

"She's right, Ziva. Find yourself a place to park it and be our lookout. Deeks, Kensi, where are you?" Eliot asked.

"I got held up, be there as soon as I can!" Kensi replied.

"Deeks?"

"I'm coming! I'm coming!" He called using the butt of his rifle to knock out the last man as he made his way for the side door of the building he had just cleared. Taking position at the corner of their target entry he nodded to Eliot to assure him he was prepared to follow.

Eliot took a quick peek in through the window to get a look at what they were dealing with. His first sight was of Garrison tied in a chair… then he looked to see Iosif circling Callen like a shark, taunting him before delivering what he was sure was just one of many punches. His blood boiled. The man would pay for what he had done to himself and his friend… and so many others. Schooling his features so as not to alert the others as to what they were facing, he turned back.

He's in there. I don't see anyone else but don't kid yourself. There's back up. I'd bet my life on it. Get ready.

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Having finished his phone call with Victor and ordered his men to prepare, Iosif returned to finish the taunting of his prisoners. He turned on Callen with a vengeance, his voice full of anger and hatred, "You are correct. You ARE to blame for what happened to my family and associates… and I believe the best way to punish you, Agent Callen, is to follow in the footsteps of Victor Pavlenko. Take that which you hold most precious… family. Leave you all alone in this world… no hope. An eye for an eye, Callen. I want you to watch as your father slowly suffocates. It is a most painful and frightening death. Listen as your dear friends, oh wait…" his laugh like fingernails on a chalkboard. "I guess they aren't quite your friends anymore, are they? All the sadder that they should die trying to save your pathetic life. Know that Victor will once again gain control of Blackguard after he has finally put an end to the rest of those who have caused us nothing but trouble. Then he will finally have your dear little Kamran," Iosif moved in, close to his face, his voice… mocking, "What is it you call her? Banana Hanna, is it? How darling, really. She will make a brilliant little agent for the Renegades one day, don't you think? All this pain and agony over the likes of you… and you will live just long enough to see their faces before the charges begin going off. Poetic justice that you should meet the same end as you forced upon the Comescu's and Romanoff's, you must agree."

Iosif heard the battle outside the building and knew they were moving closer. It appeared he underestimated these people. Circling behind Callen and speaking lowly into his ear while his voice developed a more menacing tone, "If they are lucky, some of them will make it out alive… and you will die just as you lived, a worthless piece of trash that no one wanted. G Callen, you have to know this world is a far better place without you in it. I can assure you, after today, should anyone survive, they will be saying the same thing!" Throwing one last punch to his kidney, Iosif ducked behind the row of cabinets, calling for back up.

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"On three…" Eliot reiterated, "One… two… three!" Eliot yelled as Sam busted in the door.

"WAIT! Just wait! Don't do anything until you hear from us first!" Hardison shouted once more, "and I'm sorry for yelling." He added as an afterthought.

"Hardison!" Eliot growled, "It's just a little late for that!" Realizing there was little to no cover inside the room they retreated to just outside the door of the building.

Sam scanned the room and his eyes locked on Callen. Aside from the alarming state he was in, it was the look on his face that scared him most. It was desperation.

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"Eric, there's something you need to see!" Hardison yelled across the control room of the OSP, ignoring the angry voices coming in from the field.

"What is it, Mr. Hardison" Hetty asked calmly.

"That tracker Callen's wearing? Yeah, it's no ordinary tracker!"

"What are you talking about?" Eric asked, turning to join the rest of the group.

"You mentioned more than once that Callen was more tech savvy than he let on, right? Well, something bothered me. Callen was gathering information and proof that Victor and Blackguard needed shut down… and he was always careful to protect anyone he involved from being incriminated. Now, he knew Eliot would come for him and take out Iosif and he was obviously expecting the involvement from this team since the code involved was spread across all the letters he sent here."

"Get to the point, Hardison", Nate's frustration getting the better of him.

Hardison cast him a quick look before he continued, "Well, I got to thinking… there's no way he would have allowed their involvement without insuring they wouldn't be implicated in any wrong doing."

"I appreciate your input, Mr. Hardison, I do… but time is of the essence here, I think." Hetty urged gently.

With a heavy sigh, he turned back to his keyboard, "Fine, I started thinking what we would have done… technically speaking. I started playing around with the code. The tracker does more than just track… much more. It's a communication device. He's recorded everything since he went back to Blackguard. Well, not everything, I suppose. Anyway… and get this, he rigged it to bypass the security codes in the compound. Don't you see? We can use his tracker to bust through the last of the security protocol and guide the teams the rest of the way!"

Eric looked at Hardison in disbelief… how could he have missed that?

Hetty broke through his thoughts then, "Well done, Mr. Hardison. Please help Mr. Beale. Miss Jones, sift through the recordings for anything that might prove useful, won't you?"

"Yes, mam", she replied as she quickly changed places with Hardison.

Eric and Hardison made quick work connecting the tracker to their coms. Once they were past the jamming frequency, they were able to finally see the full layout of the compound and gain access to the computer systems and cameras, "We are now downloading anything and everything from their computers systems…" Eric stated.

"Eliot, get ready, there are at least a dozen or more men left in that building and they are all headed your way." Hardison yelled.

Hetty placed a hand on his shoulder… You are doing well for your first mission, Mr. Hardison but I would remind you again, that we do not yell into coms as you will likely deafen the lot of them."

"Right, sorry. I knew that, I did" Hardison replied, kicking himself mentally. Hardison was more than familiar with the workings of the earwigs. He just wasn't quite used to this particular level of stress when his team was in the field.

Eric gave him a sympathetic smile as he continued giving guidance, "Eliot, two of Arkady's men are in the building and nearing the inner door to that room. Be aware of this when you start shooting whoever comes through the door." Also, Rear Admiral Chegwidden, Arkady and Anna are just outside the back door to the building you are in."

"For now, kid, just call me AJ."

"A.J. and Anna are coming in. I will stay behind to watch from here."

"You can call me Rear Admiral Chegwidden" A.J. looked back at Arkady with a smirk.

"A.J., you and the rest hold tight around the outside. No one gets in and no one leaves, got it?" Eliot ordered.

"Understood… you heard the man."

"Kensi! Where are you?" Sam asked.

"I'm okay! I'm with Marie. She refused to stay back. We are coming your way. Have you found Callen?" she asked with an air of desperation in her voice.

"Yeah, Kensi, we found them both." Sam replied. He had barely taken his eyes off the man. What he saw unsettled him but he feared more that which he couldn't see. He knew his partner. As long as he had known Callen, he fought a battle within his own head over his self-worth… and from everything Eliot had divulged, he hated to think what Iosif had been doing to add to that.

Kensi didn't like what she heard in Sam's voice. The sound of unspoken concern that told her gut it wasn't good.

The sound of rapid gunfire jarred Kensi from her thoughts. It was obvious Iosif's men had breached the room. She and Marie both moved quickly so they were able to help fend off the attack.

"MOVE IN!" Eliot yelled as the teams all pushed forward until everyone but Anna and Arkady were within the same space. The father and daughter remained vigilant outside the building as they awaited what they feared might be more backup for Iosif's men.

"Hate to add to your trouble in there, Eliot, but you've got company. Helicopter just landed on the roof. Either someone is coming in or someone in there is preparing to leave." Arkady called out as he motioned for two of his men to move in closer and check it out, as they, too, entered the building. "My men are heading up to the roof now. Anna and I are heading in the back… do not shoot me." He stated as he cast a smirk toward his daughter as they moved forward.

Just as quickly as the gunfire began, it ended. Eric and Hardison finally had visual… the screen filled with scene after scene of bodies.

Sam immediately ran to check on Callen. "Leave me. Garrison, save Garrison!" Callen forced out as he struggled to get back on his feet.

Sam turned to see Garrison slumped in his seat, "Eliot! Gibbs! Get to Garrison NOW!" Sam yelled, realizing what was happening. Turning back to his partner he grabbed the pick from his pocket. He's getting help, now let me get you out of these restraints."

Sam made quick work of the shackles that held him. Callen groaned from the pain as the weight on his shoulders was suddenly released. Carefully Sam began to ease Callen to the floor when he pushed him away. Gaining his footing, driven by the adrenalin entering his system, he was stopped in his tracks by the sight of his father lying on the floor as Gibbs and Eliot performed CPR. This wasn't how he intended things to go… but then things seldom went according to plan. Iosif capturing his father was not something Callen had expected… foolish on his part, really. His plan all along had been for Iosif to get pissed off enough to finish the job before these people arrived. He had no expectations where they were concerned. Iosif was an enemy, a dangerous one at that. He posed a major threat to the OSP members… He and his contacts were a danger to the country. They needed to be stopped and he made no assumption that they were here for any other reason than that. He had no where to go. He had pretty much cut ties with his sister, Alexandra and her son Jake. He had burned all bridges with NCIS and any other agency. He had nothing to return to. Knowing what he knew now, his options would be few. He worked, that's what he did… if he couldn't do that, then what was there for him. He would always be a threat to those closest to him. He had no other life to live. Giving it now to save others was, in his mind, the best option for him. Now that that was blown to hell…

Just then, Eric called through the coms frantically, "CALLEN! Behind you!" The helicopter, which had landed on the roof contained none other than Victor Pavlenko who was coming for Iosif and to see to it, himself, that Callen did not make it out alive… As Iosif ran back out ahead of Victor, assuring him there was no way the man would live, Victor was taken back by the sight of his wife. She had survived… and she came to save the man he was hell bent on finishing.

Sam spun on his heels to find Victor with a gun trained on Callen. He tackled his partner to the ground as the gunshot rang through the room. Callen rolled Sam off at the sound of a second gunshot. Rising to his feet it was then he realized who the second shot had come from, "Marie?" Callen saw the look of shock and the tear that slid down her cheek, her gun still raised. Slowly he moved closer to her and very gently, Callen lowered her arm and slid the gun from her hand. Turning around he found Victor lying on the floor bleeding profusely from a gunshot wound.

Looking down at the gun in his hand he noticed the blood that was smeared on both of them… knowing it didn't come from either himself or Marie he realized there was only one other person… Sam. It was Sam's blood.

"SAM!" Kensi cried out when she realized he was still down. Callen cast a glance in Sam's direction as he began to move, "I'm fine, Kens. It's a through and through. It didn't hit anything vital." Sam answered looking at his arm.

From the edge of his vision, Callen either sensed or he saw movement… without thought he raised the gun he had just taken from Marie and swung his arm around and shot taking everyone by surprise as Victor fell back with a second gunshot, this one to the head.

Callen's mind went back to his last thought… "blown to hell" … suddenly he grew alarmed by the memory of Iosif telling him that the building had been rigged to blow. He couldn't remember if he had told him what would trigger it to start… all he knew was that they needed to get out. He couldn't have them die here, not because of him.

"You need to get Garrison and your people and get out of here, NOW!" he yelled, bending over in pain, trying to catch his breath.


	50. Chapter 50

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Okay, so we made it through the fight… will the team make it out in time? Will they all go home with a victory? Will Callen and Iosif live to see another day? There is only one way to find out… and this is the chapter. No Cliffhanger today… you are welcome. HA. Just know that while they may be headed home… the journey isn't over. How do they come back from what has happened? Will they find the closure they so desperately need? When you finish reading, Please drop a line. Thank you so much for all the positive reviews throughout but especially these past few chapters. They were so scary. They haunted me as I wrote the entire thing… You made it all worth it. Thank you.**

"What?" Sam grunted painfully.

"There's not much time. Just get Garrison and get out." Callen commanded.

"He's right!" Nell confirmed, "Get out of there NOW! The place is rigged to blow!"

"Then, let's go" Deeks urged, running to stand next to Kensi in an effort to help Marie move to the door.

"Go! I'll meet you out there." Callen ordered.

"What the…!" Gibbs started, "What do you mean, you will MEET us out there, Callen?"

"Iosif is still in this building and he needs to pay." Callen replied.

"Callen! He's not getting away this time. The place is surrounded and the building is going to blow. He tries to leave and we'll get him. If he doesn't then he goes up with the building." Anna reasoned.

"Grisha, please. It is enough." Marie whispered.

"Marie, it is not enough… not after everything he has done. I will NOT let him slip away again." Callen argued.

"GET OUT!" Hetty ordered, "Take Mr. Callen by force if needs be."

In unison the room began moving for the closest door. Gibbs and Eliot grabbed Garrison up and carried him toward the door as Sam and Tuhon grabbed Callen and forced him to follow. Just as they cleared the doors and ran for the center of the court yard they heard the procession of charges igniting the building until the last one blew in the room they had just exited, knocking them to the ground.

"Sit rep, Mr. Hanna. We no longer have visual." Hetty ordered once more.

Gradually each person checked in until all were accounted for and Hetty sighed with relief.

"Is it always this intense when you send them out there?" Sophie asked quietly. She had said nothing through the entirety of the mission but watched in fascination at the rhythm of the teams.

"Oh, my dear, every time they go out there… there is a chance that they won't come home. I hold my breath and pray until I hear the 'all clear' at the end. I have seen how you worry over Mr. Spencer. You know what I speak of." Hetty said with a smile.

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Callen pulled away from Sam and Tuhon's grasp, his anger evident, "You let him escape!"

"You don't know that, G. He could be in that building right now, starting his much-deserved journey to hell." Sam yelled in return.

"You don't know that either!" Callen yelled in return.

"Callen, my old friend. I found something I thought you might be looking for…" Arkady called out from behind.

"He thought he'd sneak off without saying good-bye," Anna stated.

Callen turned to face his nemesis. His entire visage darkened, his eyes narrowed and flashed with hate.

"You aren't looking so good, Agent Callen. What's wrong? Have you realized what I've been telling you all along is true? You know you can never go back. You chose to live for nothing. You could have died in there and saved yourself and everyone else so much pain. I tried… however, I must say, this may prove to be so much more interesting and rewarding."

"Shut him up!" Gibbs growled.

Callen moved forward, his eyes bore into those of Iosif Romanoff. Raising the gun which he had taken from Marie just moments before and he aimed it at the man in front of him.

"G, Don't!" Sam shouted, receiving no response. Tuhon put a hand on his shoulder, stopping him from trying to reach out to Callen, "This is his battle to fight… it is his choice to make."

"Callen, you need to stand down. He is in custody," Gibbs ordered. Again, there was no response.

"They don't know the real you, do they?" Iosif goaded, "They've forgotten the monster you truly are."

"I told you all when this began, Iosif and Victor don't leave here in anything but a body bag!" Eliot growled.

Ziva put her hand softly on his arm, "Callen's fight, Callen's call," she stated just as calmly… A reminder to everyone that this was not a mission for the books… what happened there, stayed there.

Callen listened as Iosif taunted him. He lowered his gun, never taking his eyes off the man.

Realizing he showed no intention of fighting back, Iosif made his move in order to gain his freedom once again. Twisting free of Anna's grasp he knocked her off balance, grabbed her gun with the one hand as he back fisted her with the other. Raising the gun toward Callen, Anna swung her leg out and knocked Iosif's footing out from under him, bringing him crashing to the ground beside her where she promptly returned the backhanded punch using her elbow before rolling away and to her feet, reclaiming her gun as she went. Callen just stared at the entire scene in a detached manner… He had half hoped Iosif would have succeeded and shot him. It would be his last move because the rest would have shot him dead on the spot… It would almost have been worth giving Iosif the win this time… but he would never allow him the satisfaction.

"You are nothing! You will never win! You will never be good enough for these people. You are and always will be nothing more than what you were created to be… a killer."

The last of the adrenaline began to drain as Callen moved until he was standing over the man. He raised his gun slowly, once more pointing it toward his tormentor. "I may be everything you say… and you are right, there IS no going back. That life is gone, if it ever truly existed in the first place. But you will no longer have any control over me…"

No one spoke, no one moved. Their breaths were held, waiting for Callen's final act.

The agent in him told him he shouldn't pull the trigger. The assassin he was trained to be knew he could justify the kill and the man who had endured so much pain at the hands of the evil monster begged for justice…

Iosif could see the battle that raged from within and took advantage of the moment, "Is the monster winning, Agent Callen?"

Callen's eyes darkened to a cobalt blue, his hand took aim. There was no fear in Iosif's eyes. He wanted Callen to shoot. He knew there was no escape, and death was preferable to prison. Callen would have happily obliged the man but that would allow him to win and Callen could not abide that. Without taking his gun off his target, Callen raised his gaze to meet that of none other than Arkady Kolchek. They frequently fought but the truth was, Arkady and Callen were cut from the same cloth in many ways… there was an understanding that flowed between the two… it was a friendship forged through necessity, but remained out of loyalty. Arkady looked into the eyes of the man he looked on as a son, if truth be told… neither said a word, but Arkady nodded in understanding as Callen lowered his gun and turned to walk away. There wasn't a sound except for the maniacal laughter of his torturer brought to a shocking halt by a sudden gunshot echoing through the air, taking everyone by surprise. However, in the silence that followed the only thing that was heard was Callen, who did not seem the least bit shocked by the shooting as he simply said in a low and tired voice, "I win."

Arkady smiled then looked at all the stunned faces. Then in his deep, rumbling Russian accent, "Whaaaaaaat? My finger twitched. It was an accident. My doctor… he says I have the arthritis…" He opened and closed his hand in way of showing proof of what he said, "It has been long day and I am not young man, no?"

Tucking his gun into his waistband he began to follow his friend out leaving the rest shaking their heads.

Eliot chuckled as he and Gibbs lifted Garrisons unconscious body and followed behind.

Callen only made it a few yards before the events of the past few days caught up with him but Sam was there to catch him as he fell, "I got you buddy, let's get out of here."

"Bring him home, Sam. Bring our boy home. We will meet you all at the beach house. Good job everyone, well done… well done, indeed."


	51. Chapter 51

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Good afternoon! Thank you so much for all the wonderful reviews. I love this little book club feel we have going here! LOL! Okay… so, here we are on the backend of the battle. The team is heading home! Oh, the relief! (you have NO idea. As much as I couldn't wait to post it… I was soooo scared… but we all managed to survive, ha) Now, the question remains… Can we get this team back together? Can Sam and Callen get past everything that has come between them, can Sam get past himself to even try and reclaim their friendship? What about the rest of the team? Now that Callen is safe… when the adrenaline stops pumping and things calm… will they be able to get around the life Callen has been living in order to accept him back into their close-knit group? So many questions… finding the answers all starts HERE: I'll be waiting to hear what you think!**

Kensi joined Sam, Deeks, and Callen as they drove the four plus hours back to the beach house. "How's he doing?" Deeks asked, looking back over the seat.

"I don't know. He's breathing, but he hasn't so much as blinked." Kensi answered not taking her eyes off his face.

"Well, so long as he is breathing, that's a good sign." Deeks replied catching the look on Sam's face, "What?"

"So long as he's breathing? That's the best you got?" Sam chuckled. He had to admit, the urge to laugh was overwhelming. Just the relief, knowing that regardless of what yet lay ahead… at least THIS nightmare was finally behind them and Callen was safe.

"I'm not a doctor…" Deeks answered flashing a smile and a wink back at Kensi.

"I'm just glad we got to him before it was too late. I only hope we can convince him to stay this time." Kensi stated.

"Hey, first, let's make sure he's okay… we'll deal with everything else later." Sam said catching her eye through the rearview mirror.

"Right, you're right… has anyone heard how Garrison is doing? He didn't look so good back there."

"Well, considering he wasn't breathing when we found him…" Deeks stopped himself… "never mind. I'll call Gibbs and check on him."

Kensi and Sam, neither one, could stop the laughter that bubbled up within… whether it was due to Deeks or just the release of stress knowing they had Callen back and they were safely on their way home… no longer under the threat of Victor Pavlenko and Iosif Romanoff. Whatever the reason, the laughter was a welcome change from the fear and worry that had plagued them for so long.

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"Gibbs."

"Hey Gibbs, Deeks here. We were wondering how Garrison was doing…"

"All things considered, he's doing good. He woke up a few minutes ago. He's wanting to know how his son is." Gibbs replied.

"He's breathing." Deeks said casting a look at Sam with a shrug of his shoulders, "He hasn't woken up yet and he's not showing any signs of wanting to."

"Alright. Well, we should be there soon. Henrietta said she will have a doctor waiting for us when we get there. If there are any changes you let me know, you hear me?" Gibbs murmured.

"Will do." Deeks said before disconnecting the call.

"So, how is my son?" Garrison asked in a raspy voice.

"He's still unconscious… but he's alive. That's better than we were expecting when we started." Gibbs answered honestly.

"He was very angry with me." Garrison said to no one in particular.

"He had every reason to be." Gibbs growled, "Your son has needed you here for a very long time. Some of this might have been avoided had you actually bothered to show up."

"It was for his own safety." Garrison reasoned.

"Really? You're going to play that card after everything that just happened?" Gibbs growled angrily, "He has been walking the edge for a very long time. He needed you… and once again you disappeared without a word."

The car fell silent as they continued the drive back.

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Hetty paced nervously as they waited for the cars to pull up the drive to the house. Nate, Hardison, and Eric had started making room for the additional visitors while Sophie and Nell went to the kitchen to prepare something for everyone to eat. Parker remained quietly sitting in the corner of the room, watching Hetty.

"You worry about him." Parker spoke softly.

"What?" Hetty asked, stopping to look at the young woman.

"G Callen. You worry about him," she replied.

"Yes, I do. I have been worrying about him for over 40 years. If it isn't one thing, it's another." Hetty replied with a chuckle.

"He worries about you too. He worries about a lot of things, I think. He misses you all. He won't say that, but he does." Parker stated.

"What makes you say that?" Hetty asked curiously. She liked this young woman. She could easily see why Callen did. She was tender hearted and equally guarded against letting people in for fear of being hurt. She was also very observant, just like Callen and from what she had read… that wasn't where the similarities ended.

"Just the things he says and the way he looks at you. He wants a family… like Eliot. But they are scared."

"I have a feeling you understand that fear…" Hetty stated in return, making the girl shift nervously.

Not giving in to the bate, she continued, "Eliot says you need to be his family… are you going to do that… be his family?"

"You do care about him, don't you?" Hetty smiled curiously.

"Eliot likes him… says he's been like a brother to him. I like G Callen. He makes me feel safe."

"Yes, I can see that. Well, we would very much like to be his family. I guess we will see where it all lies when he gets here." Hetty answered as she turned back to the window just as the lights from the cars lightened the path to the house.

"Marcus! They are here." Hetty called out. Unsure of what might be facing them when everyone came back, Hetty had called on the help of an old doctor friend to come and check everyone over.

Carefully they helped Garrison into the house. Still weak from the events of the day he quickly settled into a chair while the doctor gave him a quick look over, "Your breathing is a bit labored… what exactly are we dealing with here?" he asked.

"Well, let's see, when we found him, he had a steady electrical current slowly suffocating him…." Gibbs stated in a matter of fact tone, "he wasn't breathing when we first got there but my guess is, he had only stopped just prior to our starting CPR. It didn't take much to get him going again."

"Well, considering what you have been through, you are doing pretty good." Marcus said patting his arm, "We will get you some supplemental oxygen and some IV fluids to help with dehydration and see how you do. Who else do we have?"

"Here." Sam and Deeks came through the door with Callen.

"Take him back to the library. I had the men set a bed up in there for Callen." Hetty directed, following close behind.

"Okay, give me a bit to check him out and then I will come talk to you, okay? It will be alright Hetty, I promise." Marcus smiled, "Oh and Sam, you better let Hetty see to that bullet hole in your arm… you too, A.J."

"hmmm, very well," Hetty gave a fleeting glance at the man laying so quietly in the bed. Deeks helped Hetty grab the supplies needed for both gunshot wounds as well as for Garrison and Ziva before turning to leave, pulling the door shut behind her.

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"Let's join the others in the kitchen, shall we? I believe it is as good a time as any for a sit rep. Jethro needs to touch base with Leon."

They entered the large kitchen to find everyone sitting slumped in the chairs around the dining room table as each nursed their own injuries, most minor in nature. "We seem to be missing a few people…" she mentioned.

"My men have stayed behind to assure there would be no evidence that any of us had been there." Arkady explained.

"How is he?" Tuhon asked, looking up from his coffee as Sam set about working on Garrison while Hetty took care of AJ.

"Marcus is with him now. He will let us know after he is done checking him over. What happened, Sam? Hetty asked.

"Exactly what you expected. The bastard tortured him… I'm not sure of what all he did to him but he was in bad shape when we got there." Sam answered her.

"That monster tortured my son both physically and emotionally. I fear what this may have done to him." Garrison spoke harshly.

"Callen had no intention of surviving and Iosif did his best to encourage that thought. You better be ready because you are going to have a fight on your hands." Eliot warned.

"So, am I to take it, no one got away?" Hetty asked.

"I warned you before, we weren't bringing anyone home but Callen and his father." Eliot stated.

"Yeah, I think we found out that Sam isn't the only one who has silent conversations with Callen," Deeks amusement was cut short by Sam's glare.

"Indeed" Hetty raised her brow as she caught the look that passed back and forth between the two men.

"It's nothing." Sam grumbled as the other agents around the table joined Deeks in laughter. Arkady grinned smugly as Hetty lowered her chin to look over the top of her glasses at him.

The sudden lightheartedness of the conversation helped ease the tension they were all feeling if only for a moment.

Hetty noticed that Garrison was caught up watching Parker. They had never had a reason to meet and yet she got the distinct feeling that he recognized her. She made a mental note to speak to him about it later.

The room fell into silence as they heard the footsteps coming down the hall.


	52. Chapter 52

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hello. After all the action and tension of the past several chapters… this one may not be quite so exciting… however, it is a pathway towards healing relationships… tension enough awaits them on that journey even yet. So, my apologies for the short chapter… I have to go away today for a bit so, if I get back and you are interested… I might be willing to post a second chapter. Have a great day! Thank you again, for all the lovely reviews!**

"Marcus…" Hetty greeted as he entered the room and looked at the expectant faces, "How is he?"

"Well, I did the best I could with what I have to work with. I can safely say other than a few possibly cracked ribs, there are no broken bones. He has some very deep bruising in his torso. I am a bit concerned that he hasn't woken up as yet. However, that is not surprising considering the concussion he is dealing with as well as fatigue and dehydration… I treated and covered the lacerations across his front and back which, if I am not mistaken, came from a whip? There were also multiple electrical burns which I treated, as well as, miscellaneous other cuts and abrasions. I will keep a close eye on him tonight but I would think with some rest, food, and fluids for the dehydration, he will make a full recovery… physically anyways." He explained quietly, "You are welcome to take turns sitting with him, if you'd like… it may be good for him to know he is surrounded by friends. I need to get back. If you need me for anything, you know where to find me."

The room remained quiet even after he left…

"I'll let Leon know." Gibbs said getting up from the table to walk outside.

"Where are my kids at now?" Sam asked, noticing they were no longer in the house.

"Aiden took Kamran for a walk. You can see them down there." Nell answered.

"Parker went to join them." Sophie added as way of reassurance.

Sam nodded as he cast a glance toward the beach. He wondered if maybe Kamran should be the one to sit with his one-time partner. After all, she was the one to reach him the last time he refused to wake up… but then, did he want to put her through that again. "I'm going to go sit with him for a while."

"Very well, I brought a change of clothes for you all from the wardrobe at the OSP. Kindly, do not ruin them… and I expect them to be returned clean, please." Hetty stated smartly… "Feel free to take a shower."

"Thank you, Henrietta, but I think I am going to head back, Tuhon, need a lift back to the OSP?" A.J. asked before adding, "Arkady?"

Both men agreed to the offer and gave their good-byes as they headed for the door.

"Henrietta Lange, you keep me up to date on the boy, yes?" Arkady asked… "Anna, will you come or will you stay?"

"Oh… you know, I think I'm going to stick around here for a while. If anything changes, I will call you." Anna replied.

"Very well, daughter. I will see you tomorrow."

Once their guests left Hetty showed everyone to their rooms to freshen up and rest.

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Sam slumped down into the chair next to Callen's bed and ran a hand over his face with a weary sigh. He sat, watching and waiting. Waiting for any sign that he'd awaken soon.

It never ceased to amaze him how Hetty always managed to have what was needed when these things happened. He looked at the heart monitor and the IV bag hanging above the bed and an oxygen tank at the ready and who knew what else…

"We ain't doin' this again G. You need to wake your butt up. Don't make me bring Kamran in here." When no response came, he pulled himself to his feet with a sigh.

"Look, I know you've been through a lot… you're tired, I get it… so rest now, but you don't get to just leave this time. No more man." Sam turned and faced the doctor, "You sure he's okay?"

"As sure as I can be. He's had it rough lately… he needs rest. Not unlike the rest of you. Why don't you tell Hetty and the others to go get some sleep and they can see Callen after he wakes up. I will stay with him." Marcus reassured him.

Sam seemed to consider what he said, "How long have you known Hetty?"

Marcus smiled, "I have known Callen and Hetty for a very long time. I promise you, I'm not taking any chances with his safety."

"Yeah, well, anything changes…" Sam started to say before Marcus chuckled as he interrupted while opening the door.

"I will let you know, immediately."

Sam looked back with a small smirk, "Later, doc."

Once he was certain Sam was headed back to the others, he closed the door and walked back into the room.

"You know, it amazes me how well you control your heartrate. It's almost scary sometimes. Not even the slightest jump when he threatened you with his daughter?" Marcus chuckled as he turned his sights from the monitor to the man lying in the bed looking back at him.

"Why though, why prolong their concern?" he asked, "Didn't their coming together to save you prove their loyalty to you?"

"I have no desire to make them worry. I'm simply not ready to deal with them and for the record, had things gone according to plan, I wouldn't be here. Besides, they had a job to do. They couldn't let Victor and Iosif get away. They had a job to do." Callen turned his head away and closed his eyes.

Marcus watched him with concern… the monitors no longer showed the well-controlled heart rate of just moments before. Choosing to ignore the implications of what Callen had just admitted he turned away from the bed, "Well, I bought you at least a little time."

"Thank you, Marcus, you're a handy guy to have around," Callen offered, grunting in pain as he attempted to sit up.

"You're welcome. I'm happy to oblige. However, you even think of getting out of that bed right now and all bets are off, especially Hetty. I meant what I said to Sam, you need rest."

"Fine," came the reluctant reply. Truth was, he didn't have the strength to sit up unaided, let alone leave… no matter how much he wished he could. His head was pounding and he was starting to feel ill from it and the more he moved the dizzier he got.

"They seem genuinely concerned. Maybe it's time you hear them out and before you say anything, Hetty explained everything to me. You know, the past five years have been especially hard on her. She felt so bad for everything that happened. She never stopped worrying about you. Did you know she pretty much lived at Dovecote this whole time? She knows how you feel about that place… she wanted to be there should you decided to come home." Marcus stated quietly, "You know how Hetty is about staying in the same place for very long with the long line of enemies she has… though she did mention that several of them had mysteriously been, how shall we say, eliminated from the game." He watched Callen closely as he sat down in the same chair Sam had just vacated.

"Yes." was all he offered.

"Yes? Yes, what? Wait… you knew?" Marcus remarked in surprise, "I don't understand, if you knew…"

Callen glanced at the man before letting his gaze turn to the ceiling above him, "I may have been angry but…" he left the explanation go unfinished, swallowing hard in an effort to control the nausea.

Just as Marcus was about to reply, there was a knock on the door. After a quick glance toward Callen, he held up his hand to warn him to be quiet and to stay put as he went to see who it was.


	53. Chapter 53

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi. Hope you are having a lovely weekend. Well, it feels like a slow start to recovery here, with these short chapters but they are necessary to the progression of things. Hope you enjoy! You know what I'm going to ask and I hope you oblige. There is a lot of angst to deal with here. It's only just beginning and has yet to come to a head.**

Stepping out into the hall, he closed the door behind him, praying Callen wouldn't use the opportunity to disappear, though, from the looks of it he doubted Callen could even stand up straight should he find the strength to try.

"Kamran, right? You're Sam's daughter?" Marcus asked.

"Yes, sir. Can I please see Uncle Callen?"

Before Marcus could answer she continued.

"Please! I really need to talk to him. I said some awful mean things to him before he left last time and I need to tell him I'm sorry. I just really need to see him. Please?"

Marcus hated the sorrow he saw in the young girl's eyes, "I know how worried you are right now, but he's going to be okay. For now, his body just needs rest. Tomorrow will come soon enough and you can see him then, okay?"

Kamran's eyes glistened with unshed tears, "Okay…" she replied, quietly turning to walk away.

As the doctor turned back toward the door, he was stopped as she ran back down the hall. "Will you give him this for me? I found it on the beach and I want him to have it… please?" She handed him a piece of brilliant blue sea glass, "It's the color of his eyes when he's happy." she smiled fondly.

Marcus smiled as he turned the piece of glass over in his hand, "This is a beautiful piece of glass. You must really love him… You don't find these around here normally, and turquoise blue is extremely rare… You were very lucky!

"I know. I think I was supposed to find it." Kamran agreed.

You call him Uncle Callen? May I ask, why?"

Kamran stopped and thought before answering, "My daddy went to work with Uncle Callen and he would come home and tell mom that he wouldn't talk about nothing. Dad doesn't like that. He says you need to be willing to share if you are going to be able to trust each other. So, mom told him to invite him to dinner but he wouldn't come… then one day he did. Daddy said Uncle Callen saved his life and so now his family wanted to say thank you… he made him promise to come. Uncle Callen NEVER breaks his promises…"

"So how did you end up calling him Uncle?" he asked curiously.

"I don't know, really. It just kinda happened. He came over once for dinner. He was really nervous but he liked me… This one time, he got hurt and came to stay with us for a while. I heard daddy tell him he was like a brother to him… so, after that, I started calling him Uncle and then so did Aiden. He didn't get mad so…"

Marcus chuckled, "I see. Makes sense to me." Holding up the piece of sea glass, "I will make sure he sees it just as soon as he is awake, I promise."

"Thank you… Good Night, sir."

Marcus closed the door and headed back into the room. Thankful to find Callen still there, he started talking.

"That was Kamran. She brought you a gift… says it reminds her of your eyes when you're happy. Apparently, you blue eyed people… Callen? Stop messing around." Marcus looked at the low but steady beat on the heart monitor, and muttered under his breath, "I'm a doctor and even I can't tell if you are actually asleep."

Taking note of his vitals and checking his bandages he took the piece of glass from his pocket and held it between his fingers, "I don't know if you're hearing me or not but regardless of what that head of yours is trying to tell you, I'm begging you not to listen. I know some of what went on here, enough to know they screwed up… but that's it, they screwed up. They made a mistake. They realize that. I wasn't there to see what happened, I don't know what went down… what that man said to you in the time he held you captive… I see the physical damage and can only imagine the emotional… but G, that little girl adores you and she is hurting over whatever mean thing she said to you. You need to let her make amends. For your sake, my friend, you need to let them have their say and stop running."

Marcus gently placed the precious gift on the table next to the bed before finding his way to the couch on the other side of the room.

Once he heard the soft snore assuring him the other man was asleep, Callen opened his eyes. He had, in fact, heard every word his friend had said. He hated that Kamran was upset over what he felt were legitimate feelings. Holding his ribs with one hand, he reached for the table and picked up the sea glass Marcus had left there. He held it up towards the lamp in order to better see the color. It was a lucky find on this beach. It was a pretty one and fair sized too. Maybe he would have it made into a necklace for her.

He laid back and attempted to get some sleep. When Marcus checked on him a few hours later he insisted on giving him something to help with the pain of the headache as well as something for the nausea. The next few hours were fraught with one nightmare after another until finally he was lucid enough to warn Marcus there would be no more pain meds if he valued his health. The rest of the day was spent avoiding anyone coming in to see him regardless of Marcus's attempts to convince him to do otherwise.

He spoke little the rest of the day and moved around even less. Once everyone had finally settled in for the night, he allowed himself to attempt to sit up. He didn't dare move very much due to all the wires and iv, so he sat quietly considering everything that had happened. His thoughts were tormented at best. He would have to face everyone eventually. It was a prospect he dreaded with every fiber of his being. As color began creeping into the sky, Callen quietly turned the monitor off and removed the wires from his chest and the IV from his arm. Slowly and as quietly as he could, he pulled himself to a sitting position. He found a change of clothes, courtesy of Hetty, in the bathroom adjacent to the library. Getting dressed proved to be a slow and tedious process. The bruised ribs made bending to put shoes on near impossible. The lash marks pulled as he stretched to put his T-shirt on.

Grabbing the sea glass from the table and tucking it in his pocket, he ducked out the side door to walk down to the beach.

He made it as far as the fire pit Hetty had set up. The cool ocean air had him wishing he'd brought a jacket to help ward off the painful ache the chill caused. He lowered himself into one of the chairs that faced the ocean.

His thoughts were turbulent at best. His head ached as he thought back over the events of the past five years. One mission, that's all it took to destroy what had taken the better part of a decade to create. Was it worth fixing? What was there to fix? Knowing what he knew now… nothing from his past seemed real. It was a mere fabrication made by the government to control him. Everyone that he remotely cared about had died… been killed… all because of what he could do for the government. He truly was nothing more than a tool for them to use.

As far as he could see, being a tribe of one was the only safe answer for all concerned. What Blackguard had put into motion a lifetime ago had made any prospect of a normal life for him, now, seem impossible.


	54. Chapter 54

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hello, good morning, good afternoon, good night… you choose. Okay, so we are getting a wee bit closer… We have thinned out a few of the characters… Callen has gotten himself up and moving… whether he should or not, be hanged. Now to start working him towards dealing with a future he didn't expect to have. How weird would that be? Let me know how we are doing when you finish reading… Enjoy!**

"I can't believe it!" Marcus shouted in frustration as he entered the kitchen a few hours later.

"Is there a problem," Hetty asked as she and Gibbs looked up from their respective drinks.

"What? Oh, he ducked out on me. How he managed it without waking me…"

"Oh, Marcus, have you learned nothing over the years?" Hetty chuckled, "Come sit down and join us. I have some lovely orange spiced black tea or… if you prefer, Jethro made a pot of black sludge, if you will."

Gibbs smirked and shook his head as he caught the pinched look she gave, "It'll wake you up."

"Did neither of you hear me? Callen ran. He shouldn't even be moving around." Marcus looked at them in shock over their cavalier attitude, "Hetty, he has a concussion. He is emotionally a mess. We need to find him."

"You should know better than to think he would stay in bed once he woke up." Hetty smiled.

"It's fine…", Gibbs added nodding toward the door, "Been there for two hours now, round about."

"Just sitting there?" Marcus asked, looking out the window.

"What were you expecting, surfing?" Hetty asked with a grin.

"No, I just meant…"

"I know what you meant… My guess is, he is feeling quite conflicted. He has learned some disturbing facts about his life." Hetty stated.

"Add to that, the mind games Iosif had played… I don't know, Hetty. I'm very concerned he may not stick around." Gibbs leaned back in his chair, absent-mindedly fingering his cup.

"I have the same worry." Marcus agreed, "I spoke with him several times yesterday. You realize he never intended on making it out of there… that you're getting there in time to save him was not part of his plan."

"hm, yes, I'm afraid we do… all the more reason I asked you to stay." Hetty replied, "The others will be down shortly, shall we make breakfast?"

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By the time the others had all wandered into the dining room, looking for coffee and breakfast, Hetty had laden the table with anything they might want… all the while she, Gibbs, and Marcus watched the solitary man slowly progress to the water's edge and begin pacing.

"How long has he been out there?" Eliot asked, concerned.

"About three hours now." Gibbs answered, taking a sip of his coffee and sliding a cup across to the man, "Leave him to it for a bit. He needs time to think."

"Yeah, well, I'm not so sure I'd give him that much time alone in that head of his." Eliot mumbled, "it's a damn mess in there after everything Iosif and Victor said and did to him."

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I agree with Spencer." Sam grunted.

"Did he get any rest last night?" Kensi asked as she and Deeks joined the rest at the table.

"Some." Marcus answered with a sigh.

"For now, we will wait for him to come to us. To attempt to speak to him now would be a mistake." Hetty answered knowingly, "Did you all find your accommodations suitable?"

"Yes, thank you" everyone agreed.

"Good…. Now, there is plenty here so help yourselves to whatever you would like." Hetty smiled then turned her head back to the French doors looking out onto the beach, watching her boy as he slowly began working his way back to the house.

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As he drew closer to the house, he noticed the light in the dining room illuminated the space now filled with those who had insisted on bringing him back. He wasn't ready to deal with them… if he would ever be ready to deal with them… it was then he saw Kamran looking out the door at him… he felt for the piece of glass safely tucked in his pocket and knew he couldn't sneak away this time. She deserved better… just not now… not this moment… slowly he changed direction and headed for the side entrance back into the library.

It's there, he was met with a cup of coffee and his friend, Eliot. Eliot could feel the agitation radiating off his friend and knew he would need to proceed with caution.

"I'd ask you how you were doing but that is painfully obvious, you get any sleep?"

"Not after I woke up here." Callen accepted the offering and savored the warmth it provided.

"When was that, exactly?" Eliot asked curiously.

"Not long after we got here." He smirked into his cup.

"Nice. You know there is a house full of people out there who didn't get much sleep either for worrying about you. They were half waiting for you to slip into another coma."

Callen cringed at the reminder.

"I get, with everything that's gone down between you, that you aren't sure where you stand, but neither are they. I'm telling you… you need to give them a chance to make this right. They have more than proved their willingness to try… especially after the way you left here." Eliot stated.

Callen walked to the window and stared out, "I'm not sure what you or any of them expect from me. I've got nothing to give…"

Eliot looked at his friend. He knew he was hurting after all he had learned but he also knew leaving him to his own devices was not the answer.

"No one expects anything from you right now… other than the opportunity to just be there for you. I know your first instinct is to run… DON'T. Hetty put everyone in stand down… and as you can guess… they are staying here."

Callen looked back over his shoulder, "why? It's over… no one is in danger… everyone that needs to be is dead… they can go home."

"You really are thick sometimes, Callen, ya know that?" Callen's eyes narrowed as the muscle in his jaw twitched and Eliot continued, "They are staying because of YOU. They want to be here for YOU. Iosif got in your head, I get that… trust me, I know what that man can do… but you can't let that be what guides you here."

Callen said nothing. Eliot could see his unease, "Look, you need to eat something… I bet you don't even know how long it's been since you last ate. Hetty made a feast out there… no doubt all of your favorites. Join them. No one said you have to talk… just eat something."

After another moment of thought, Callen finally agreed. He knew if he didn't, Eliot would never leave him alone… he also knew that if the roles were reversed, he'd do the same thing.

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"Here they come," Deeks warned everyone as he noticed movement in the hall.

Eliot walked in with Callen close behind. He cast a warning glance around the table.

"Good morning, gentlemen," Hetty greeted warmly, "Fresh batch of pancakes just came out, find yourselves a seat."

"They're your favorite… blueberry." Kamran smiled.

Eliot sat down as Callen gently eased himself into a chair next to him. Marcus eyed him closely, watching for signs of issues. He knew he had to be in pain and he was visibly exhausted.

Callen forced his attention on his eating as he listened to the normal banter… he found himself thinking back on the days when he would have been a part of that banter… but now… after all this time… what once came so simply now seemed so out of place… difficult… how could he ever have that again?

Sam caught the lost look on his friend's face, "G, you okay?" When he didn't answer him, he tried again, "Callen."

Callen looked up then, garnering much unwanted attention, "What? No, I'm fine… you know, I think I'm going to go lie down, if that's alright?" Callen looked toward Hetty as if asking permission to leave the table, just as she had always insisted on when he was a boy living in her home. She gave him a slight nod and a small smile in way of acknowledgement as he rose to take his leave.

Marcus followed him back to the library, "thought perhaps you might like something for the pain. We should also re do those bandages."

"No pain pills." He grumbled as he sat down on the edge of the bed and removed his shirt slowly and painfully.

Marcus worked quickly to change the bandages and minimize the pain before handing him a glass of water and some pills.

"I told you, no pain pills," he grumbled.

"They aren't pain pills. Some of the wounds are showing signs of possible infection. Take the antibiotics now and we can hopefully ward off trouble later… and since you refused to leave the IV in, you need to push the water to fight the dehydration. While we are at it, you need to eat more than the little you had earlier.

Callen rolled his eyes and accepted the glass of water and pills, downing both before handing the empty glass back to the man, his brow raised, "Happy?" he asked sarcastically.

"I'm not Unhappy." Came the response, causing Callen to look back up with a smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth.

"We need to redo those before dinner and again before bed." Marcus added as he busied himself with cleaning up the old bandages.

"About that…" Callen began...


	55. Chapter 55

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Happy start to another week. So, missed yesterday… but I figured since it was Sunday, people are busy, you wouldn't miss it… so now I find myself in this debate over the fact that this is a much smaller chapter. No less important in the scheme of things but still… do I post a second chapter to make up for yesterday or just continue on. I'm in no hurry to see the end coming down the pike… I hate when it's time to post that last chapter… but… anyhoo, that's my problem, not yours. Ha! Here we go… You know the drill.**

"Before you even start… YOU aren't going ANYwhere… you have no business being up running around… you have no home to go to from what I've been told and don't even try to convince me that a rooming house is a good idea. You have the starts of an infection… you can't even reach HALF of those wounds in order to treat them and no one who can help change them for you so just lay down there and relax or I will call back every individual that went in there to save you and have them track your butt down and drag you back and don't think for a second they won't. You have a group of people out there who are worried about you… you will not give them more reason than you already have… GOT IT?" Marcus scolded him taking Callen by surprise.

"Fine!" Callen scowled as he gingerly sat back down on the bed

"You need help with your shirt?" Marcus asked watching him carefully.

"No, I'm going to leave it off for now." Callen replied as he laid back against the pillows and closed his eyes, "You planning on sitting there watching me the whole time?"

With a sigh Marcus answered honestly, "I don't know, can I trust you?"

Callen opened one eye to look at him in reply, "I said I wouldn't leave and I won't… for now."

He said nothing more and by the time Marcus finished cleaning things up he could hear the deep relaxed breaths and soft snores that told him he had drifted off to sleep. Quietly, he closed the door and moved back towards the main part of the house. Breakfast had transitioned into a clean table and a fresh round of coffee which he accepted readily.

"How's our boy?" Hetty asked what everyone was wondering.

"Sleeping. I gave him some antibiotics to ward off what appears to be the early signs of infections in several of his wounds. Hopefully one round will be sufficient in keeping it from progressing further." Marcus sighed.

"Is something bothering you, Marcus?" Hetty gently pushed.

Marcus looked straight at her and then Garrison, "I have managed to convince him to stay put for the time being but I'm not sure how much time I can buy you. He was more than clear last night when we spoke that he was not supposed to have survived this and he is obviously unsure of where he belongs now at this point. He's not going to stay if you don't give him a reason to… and soon."

As if to accentuate the moment, a sudden yell could be heard coming from the library turned bedroom followed by a crash then silence. Hetty put a hand on Marcus's arm stopping him from moving to check on the man in question, followed by a look around the table as a warning to everyone else. No further sounds were heard as the morning passed by leading into lunch.

Kensi had excused herself from the group as they gathered once more on the deck to eat a small bite that Deeks and Eliot were busy pulling together. She quickly made her way down the hall to the closed door at the end. She paused for only a moment before carefully turning the handle. Quietly she slipped in and closed the door behind her. He was lying on the bed breathing evenly. Moving forward, she was stopped short by the sight of his many wounds… taking note of the multitude of scars that eluded to prior injuries since he had left. She cringed inwardly at the thoughts that invaded her mind… all that he must have gone through… alone. She watched him for a moment before retreating back to the hallway, leaving him to sleep… praying that it was a peaceful one.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

"You really are good in the kitchen Deeks", Eliot admitted. Surprisingly, he had grown to like the scruffy detective. Callen had mentioned the fact that he was hard to take sometimes but ultimately, he was a valuable member to the team and he respected him as such. After the events of the past few days, Eliot could see why Callen felt that way.

"Thanks man… you too. Callen said you knew how to cook. He doesn't throw compliments around lightly…" Deeks grinned, trailing off as he became lost in thoughts.

"You okay?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, I'm fine… just thinking. You know, this all happened because of me… if I had just listened to him and trusted the plan… I wouldn't have gotten shot the second time and Callen wouldn't have had to deal with all the backlash". Deeks had felt the guilt of that day nearly five years ago now every day since.

Eliot stopped what he was doing and turned to face the man, "You know, Callen told me how you had really turned into a valuable member on this team. He apparently wasn't always so sure you would make the cut." Eliot chuckled at the shocked look on his face. "Are you seriously going to stand there and tell me you are surprised?"

Deeks returned the chuckle, "no, guess not. He didn't really like me when I first came on board… Sam either for that matter… actually Sam was far less impressed with me than Callen."

"Yeah, well, you proved yourself, apparently. Look, you know Callen isn't one to share much but he's mentioned how you dared to stand up to him in some of his less controlled moments. Takes guts. He respected that."

Deeks thought back to the day they had found out Joelle had been working with the CIA the whole time she and Callen was supposedly dating… He hadn't taken it well and the sight of him destroying the furniture she had bought for his house and stuck with him. They had had an interesting conversation that night and their relationship had become more of a friendship after that. "He is one of the best agents I have known since joining NCIS. I was lucky to be on his team. I've learned a lot from him. I just feel bad that I was the reason he may now choose to leave."

"Listen to me. You ARE NOT the reason he left. Sam and Kensi… especially Sam… would be the reason he left. Sam was his partner. He should have known Callen was not capable of what they accused him of… Look, regardless of what happened back then… what's happening now is something entirely different. If it's one thing I can say… Callen doesn't hold onto things. He won't forget who crossed him and trust lost is hard to regain… but not impossible. But a lot has happened since then… no, if he leaves now… it's more to do with his demons than anything your team did. Grab those plates and let's get this crowd fed… someone else is doing the dishes." He growled as he headed out the door ahead of Deeks who just grinned his approval.

With the meal done, Sophie, Nate, Ziva, and Anna had all said their goodbyes and headed back to their respective homes in an effort to alleviate the obvious tension it caused Callen, having so many people around. Parker and Hardison excused themselves to a walk on the beach while everyone else lounged on the deck. To their surprise, Callen finally made an appearance.


	56. Chapter 56

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Another short-ish chapter, I suppose… baby steps. Callen isn't up to much more than that at this point, anyway. HA.**

"Mr. Callen, nice of you to join us. You look slightly more rested." Hetty greeted, garnering no response.

The silence was uncomfortable for all concerned, everyone afraid to speak first.

Finally, Callen cleared his throat as he looked out to the ocean before looking back to the people around him.

Pulling the piece of sea glass from his pocket he held it up and looked to Kamran, "Thank you, Kamran. It's beautiful."

She quickly approached him and stopped short, unsure of how to proceed for fear of hurting him.

Callen chuckled softly, "the color of my eyes when I smile, huh?"

"Yeah!" she replied, blushing as she heard the hushed laughter of those around her.

"I didn't realize my eyes changed colors with my mood. Do they turn red when I'm angry, or green if I'm jealous?" Callen joked softly, trying to put her at ease.

Kamran grinned at the joke, "No, silly. When you are angry, they turn a really dark blue and when you are worried or sad, they look like the ocean… almost a grey blue… like now." she replied.

Callen stared at her a moment, his brows furrowing in thought as he was suddenly regretting having brought it up.

He quickly glanced off into the distance in an effort to gain control of his thoughts.

"It's like a built-in mood ring." Deeks blurted before Kensi slapped him on the back of the head, "What was that for?" he asked, rubbing the spot.

"Because Gibbs couldn't reach over here to do it himself." She answered crossing her arms and sporting an easy grin.

Deeks thought a moment before looking to Callen. Moving till he stood in front of him, "Hey, while I have the opportunity… I wanted to say I'm sorry."

"For what exactly?" Callen looked at him in confusion, barely acknowledging Kensi coming to stand by her husband and partner.

"For all of this. It all started with that mission. If I hadn't been slow to catch on, I wouldn't have been shot and you wouldn't have left and Iosif wouldn't…"

"Stop, just stop. None of this is on you. You did nothing wrong." Callen stated calmly.

"I dis…"

"He's right, Deeks. It was my fault, at least partly."

Callen rolled his eyes up to the sky allowing a frustrated sigh to escape his lips, "No, Deeks, Kensi. I chose to leave, simple as that."

"We nearly lost you so many times in the past five years and we just want you to know we're sorry. I never wanted you to leave like that. WE never wanted you to leave at all!"

"Kensi… it's okay. I'm fine." Callen assured her.

"You call this fine? All those scars? That's NOT okay." Kensi argued. I can't even imagine all that you have gone through since leaving. None of this should EVER have happened! We should have been with you, to protect you…"

Callen's eyes darkened only briefly before he was able to get his emotions back under control. "Listen to me! This was not my first run-in with Iosif Romanov. I've known him longer than I've known any of you. There is plenty of blame to go around but none of it is on you." Callen insisted before stepping back against the railing, the stress of the moment and the look in Kensi's eyes was almost more than he could bear.

Kensi watched him with concern, "Are you okay?"

He gave her a weak smile and short nod.

Kensi reached for Callen's hand that held the blue sea glass they had mentioned earlier, causing him to look down. He opened his hand as she picked it up and looked at it. She smiled then, the smile that always caused his heart to speed up slightly. "She's right, you know. It is the color of your eyes when you smile. I miss it." She finished with a whisper as she placed it back in his palm and folded his fingers back over it, "I'm glad you are back, that you are safe and I just hope you stay this time. This is your home."

Callen continued looking at his closed hand, afraid to look up for fear of what she might see in his eyes. That if he let his guard down for even a minute, they might just see the demon inside and realize what a mistake it was to care about him… to want him to be here. "See, that's where I'm not sure I can agree. I'm not sure this was ever my home… To be honest, if I ever had a home at all. I don't know where I belong or even IF I belong." he spoke in a near whisper. His heart was breaking as he spoke at the realization that he truly wasn't sure who he was or where he belonged anymore. For so long he thought he was in total control of his life only to find out now, he had NEVER been in control of anything. He still wasn't sure who he could trust or believe… they had all lied to him about things pertaining to his life… everyone but his team… Sam, Kensi, Deeks, Nell, and Eric… as far as he could remember, they had never lied to him… until that day… Now he wasn't sure of anything. Even if what they had created in those early years was real… what now? What did they think of him now, with everything they knew of his dealings over the course of his time with the CIA and Blackguard… Hadn't they all called him a monster at one point or another? Even Marie said it. His head hurt from trying to figure it all out. It didn't help they were all right there… wanting answers he didn't have.

Callen turned, looking out at the beach. He needed to walk the water's edge, feel the breeze, the sand give way beneath his bare feet, smell the salty air, hear the roar of the waves rushing in. He needed the peace that came with it… the need to escape was building and yet the exhaustion he felt was overwhelming.

If he was honest with himself, what he really needed was to sit down. The pain was building in his ribs. The lacerations left by the whip felt as though they were on fire as did the burns. His stomach churned from the headache. What he wanted, was to call it a day. He wasn't ready for this.

"Callen… of course you belong here." Kensi encouraged, bringing Callen back from his thoughts.

Finally, he lifted his head, slowly turning back as he glanced quickly around the group there. He noticed those who were missing and assumed they must have left for their real lives and wondered why the rest were still here.

He smiled sheepishly, "Seriously, I'm fine. You don't need to hang around here, go home… live your lives… I'm sure there are others out there needing your help. I will be fine."

"We aren't going anywhere. We are staying right here… with you." Kensi smiled sweetly as she reached out to touch his hand, shocked when he pulled back abruptly.

"I don't need you here… I told you, I'm fine… Blackguard is done for, Iosif and Victor are dead… the Comescus are gone… I have nothing to worry about… For today, no one is looking to kill me so… we're good here. You can go!" Callen moved away and headed down onto the beach. Part of him hoped they would take the hint and go and yet he found another part of himself scared to death that they may just take him at his word and turn their backs on him for good. Sadly, he would understand if they did, in fact, leave him behind. He deserved it.


	57. Chapter 57

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hi all. Okay, so the cast at this point is as follows. I, too, needed to thin out the cast as it was getting to be more than just a little difficult to keep track of. HA. It was fun, but exhausting. I look back and think now of all the things I WISH I had done while I had this insane group of characters together… sigh. No regrets just pocketed thoughts for another time, perhaps. We still have Eliot, Hardison and Parker from Leverage… Gibbs… Marie… and the entire LA team (including Sam's kids).**

 **We are in the wind down phase of the story, folks. Maybe 10 chapters remain… Hopefully you aren't growing bored with it. I initially panicked at the thought of this story. I never thought I could write one as long as "On the Other Side of Fear Lies Freedom"… let alone another… But the character's were loyal to the story and pretty much wrote it for themselves. LOL!**

 **As this story winds down and I finish writing the next one… If you have any ideas you would like to see covered in a story… toss them out there for my pondering… I love the team as a whole but am rather partial to Callen… but try to involve the entire cast… so let me know. My stories are all connected… kind of it's own take on the series… each story a new episode, if you will… so yeah. Okay. Let me know. Thanks…**

 **OH! and** **Countrygirluk56** **, HA, I was reading your review and thinking on it when I pulled this chapter up to prepare it for posting, thinking of how I might address your interest in what the others were thinking of the exchange and had to chuckle, because I didn't have to do a thing… this chapter should be exactly what you were looking for. Great minds think alike.**

Kensi watched in shock as he walked away from the group, "What did I do? Did I say something I shouldn't have?"

"It's not you, my dear. He is hurting. He needs time to lick his wounds and come to terms with things. Give him some time to think and he will be more inclined to discuss things." Hetty offered. "Miss Jones, Mr. Beale why don't you and the Hanna children help me clean the kitchen up from lunch and make a tray for Mr. Callen to have when he gets back."

Gibbs watched Callen quietly while the others followed Hetty into the kitchen. Once they were gone, he stood, never taking his eyes off the man, "Iosif really did a number on him." He growled angrily.

"Victor is as much to blame as Iosif." Marie added, "All is not lost, however. He remains here…"

"Yeah, but for how long?" Sam asked with a sigh.

"I believe your daughter holds one of the keys to that question." Gibbs stated, "You may very well hold the other. You need to talk to him at some point Sam. If he is to stay, he will be your partner. If he senses that's a problem, well…"

Sam looked at Gibbs and then back out toward the beach at the man he used to look at as a brother… wondering if he ever really knew him at all… He wasn't angry with the man. He was grateful for all that he had done for his family. It was simply reconciling all that had come to light and how the person he knew all those years appeared nothing like the man walking the beach now. "Yeah… I'm just not sure I'm ready to have that discussion just yet and truth is, I'm not sure he is either." With a sigh, Sam pulled himself up and walked back into the house.

"Wow." Deeks mumbled shaking his head while Kensi just watched her friend and mentor slipping farther away.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Henrietta, you old spy. Old habits die hard," Garrison stated as he entered the kitchen to find her staring out the window.

"Who are you calling old?" She returned with a small smile and a glint in her eye.

Garrison chuckled as he retrieved a cup of coffee and settled at the table, "So, have the children made up?" he asked, taking a sip of his coffee.

Hetty bristled at his simplification of issues he knew little about, "If you are asking if his family and team has been restored, we are not without hope… unlike your relationship with your son." She accused, causing him to raise a brow.

"Really, Hetty, you know the reasons I stay away better than most. You know it is necessary. There are simply things he is better not knowing about. His mother would never have forgiven us had it slipped out now. We came close this time. Too close. It is good Marie and Arkady were there."

"Yes, Nikita," Hetty stated, using his given name, "it was a good thing they were there to clean up your mess. Someone is always having to step up in your place." Hetty scowled.

"I thought you were fond of my son," Garrison said.

"That is not the point. That man out there has more people behind him than he will ever know. What he needed most was you, Nikita!"

"This grows tiring. You know why that wasn't possible then and why it will likely never be possible." Garrison sighed, "I thought perhaps… perhaps we would finally have that chance with Alexandra and Jake… that we could mend fences around them… but once again they found me and if not them it is your government looking for me. If I stop moving… it is only a matter of time. Then we risk EVERYTHING coming to light and that simply is not an option for that boy. He must NEVER know!" Garrison's voice became more adamant with each word.

"Then stop toying with him, Nikita. Hasn't he been manipulated and controlled enough by the government? Should he have to be dealt the same from his own father? And what of Alexandra and Jake?" Hetty pushed.

"It is the same. Do not encourage their relationship, Henrietta. The risk is too great. He has far too many enemies." Garrison warned.

"Nikita, you are no better than Victor… destroying every chance at happiness for that boy!" Hetty was growing angrier and more frustrated by the moment, "He deserves a family!"

"Victor is the very reason why that's not ever going to be possible for him. You want to make me the villain, Henrietta but perhaps you are just as guilty as I. You keep telling him he can have a family… that he can be like the rest of his team… He cannot and you know it. Why do you insist on setting him up for failure and disappointment?" Garrison asked.

"Because he CAN have a family. We may never be able to undo all the damage Victor has caused or for that matter all the many abusive families he was forced to endure while his father disappeared for years on end… but we are there for him. We have his back. He isn't alone when he is with his team." Hetty stopped and took a few breaths in an effort to control her anger and frustration for the man in front of her. "Nikita, perhaps it is best that you go… and this time do not come back. Grisha is no longer your concern. We will take care of him. We are his family."

"Henrietta" Garrison leaned back in his chair.

"Nikita", Hetty challenged.

"I find no joy in any of this. You think I wouldn't have preferred my family whole, compared to this?!"

"One time, yes… now? After all the years of neglect and pain Grisha has survived… the life your choices have condemned him to? I wouldn't have a clue. The others have been advised and precautions taken. We will keep your secret but it comes with a price… you leave… for good." Hetty answered.

Until this moment, Sam stood unnoticed just outside the door in the hall listening. Clearing his throat, he entered.

"Mr. Hanna," Hetty greeted with little welcome.

"Hetty… Garrison. What's going on?" Sam stated looking between the two.

"We were just having a discussion." Hetty stated looking at Garrison.

"Yes, I heard and it sounded like you were telling Garrison to walk out of G's life again. I'm not sure that's the smartest decision at this point, do you? Unless there is something I don't know. If so, care to fill me in?" Sam asked. While he wasn't sure where he and his old friend stood with each other at this point, one thing hadn't changed… Sam had a protective streak where Callen was concerned and he didn't take lightly with people who messed with him. He needed to protect him… like a brother should.

It was in that moment that Sam knew what he needed to do next but at this moment he needed to find out what these two were up to.

"Now is not the time, Mr. Hanna. This is none of your business." Hetty admonished.

"I beg to differ. Anything with the potential to hurt G IS most definitely my business and the business of this team," Sam stated sensing more than seeing Deeks and Kensi come up behind him.

"What's going on?" Deeks asked.

"That's what I'm trying to find out." Sam stated never taking his eyes off Hetty.


	58. Chapter 58

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hello. I hope you are having a lovely cloud free day… I'm not. It's cloudy and blah! So, I decided to lose myself in pen and paper. Yes, old school writing is still my preferred method of story telling. I just finished the rough draft of my next story. Now to type it up and send it off to my daughter who checks things over and helps me edit it for round two.**

 **I hope you are still enjoying the story. It's winding down. It may not seem like it, but we are getting there. I don't like dragging things out any more than I like hurrying through a solution… so it will resolve in due course.**

 **Enjoy and let me know what you think. Thank you for all the kind reviews of late!**

"Henrietta thinks it would be best if I take my leave… permanently… from my son's life." Garrison replied.

"There is more to it than that, Nikita and you know it. You have manipulated his life every bit as much as the government… perhaps your intentions were less ominous but never the less they were equally destructive. As I said before, I have taken precautions… the boy will be safe… without your interference. If you have no intention of staying here and fighting the battle head on… you need to walk away for good."

"The boy comes." Garrison stated looking out the French doors, onto the deck.

Callen stepped into the dining room and immediately went on alert. "What's going on here?" he asked looking at Sam, Deeks and Kensi who appeared to be as lost as he was as to the situation between the two spies. "Hetty?" he asked again as he cast a glance between the two.

"It was nothing. We were just discussing old times… were we not, Nikita?" Hetty asked the old man once more using his given name in lieu of warning.

Narrowing his eyes, he looked at his father, sensing there was more to things than Hetty was letting on.

"I am glad you are safe, my son." Garrison stated.

"I feel a but coming, so what is it?" Callen asked showing no emotion.

Garrison watched his son for a moment before casting a fleeting glance in Hetty's direction… who returned the look with one of warning… something Callen didn't miss.

"What is it? What aren't you telling me?" Callen demanded.

"I was just explaining to Henrietta that I'm going to need to be going. My people are telling me…"

"What people, Garrison?" Callen growled, "No, you know what? I don't care. Go then and do me a favor… stay gone. While you are at it, stay away from Alex and the boy. They deserve better. We are done with whatever game you are playing. I don't need you and they sure as hell don't need you messing in their lives. I have lived my entire life without you. I'm quite good at being alone."

Callen stopped and grabbed for the counter in order to steady himself. His breathing had become shallow and quick. Sam stepped forward in support but Callen brushed him off before looking back towards his father.

"moy syn" Garrison stated, his voice deep with emotion, "It's just not that simple… I want to…"

Callen's hand came up to stop him, "Don't, just don't. I have heard the excuses. I asked you once if I was worth fighting for, staying for… you said yes. It was a lie. Maybe Victor was right about more than I care to admit. Well, I'm done. I'm doing you a favor, really. I'm releasing you of your burdens… go. Forget that I ever existed, it shouldn't be too hard for you. Find an island somewhere to retire on or whatever it is you do… but stay out of LA."

"My enemies will not forget." Garrison explained.

"Let them come," Callen's eyes darkened, his voice void of any feeling, "I have become quite efficient in dealing with my enemies."

Callen turned and headed back down the hallway.

"Grisha! If you love your sister and her son, you will heed your own warning and stay away from them as well. It is for their own safety. You are no better for them than I." Garrison called out.

Kensi looked back over her shoulder toward the departing figure… she watched as his head fell and his shoulder drooped at the last words of his father…

"Seriously, Nikita… those are the final words you would leave your son?" Hetty did nothing to hide the anger in her voice.

"I spoke the truth and you know it. You are living in a dream world, Henrietta, if you think it can be any other way!" Garrison growled in return as he stood and faced the team, "You MUST watch out for him."

"Better than you." Sam replied without sympathy.

"Very well, Henrietta, but you must remain vigilant. They do not understand all that is at stake."

"I am well aware, Nikita", Hetty answered, "As I said, despite his best efforts at times, your son has many who worry and care for him. He will not be alone and neither will his sister and her son."

Garrison offered only a small smile and a nod before turning and walking out of the room.

The kitchen fell quiet. Sam waited until he was certain they were alone, "Hetty, something you need to tell us?"

"Oh, Mr. Hanna, there are many things, but I am not at liberty to speak of them here and now," holding up her hand to prohibit any interruptions, she continued, "Suffice it to say, there are those who know and they will have his back. Mr. Callen has just closed a vital door to his past and while I know his father well enough to know that he will never leave his children vulnerable, he will abide by his son's request. Mr. Callen will undoubtedly follow his father's advice and keep Alex and Jake at arm's length. He will be alone, without family." Hetty's voice was filled with sadness.

"Who are all these other people that are watching his back? Are they family? Who?" Sam asked.

"Many of them, he does not even know and the rest… he has no real clue as to how they are truly connected and he must NEVER know, Mr. Hanna. This is vital to his safety… and theirs."

"Hetty, I'm confused. I thought everything was out on the table now. I thought this was done. Are you telling me we haven't finished with this mess yet?" Sam asked, fully frustrated by the thought.

"It is done, for now. Sam… he has many enemies, you know that…. But he has many more that even he is unaware of. The time will come when I will divulge to you all I know, if you remain steadfast and are willing," Hetty looked at each member of the team, "I will not always be able to help our friend… nor will the others and it will fall to you and this team in its entirety to keep him safe… just as he keeps watch over all of us. There's no difference, really… except that he insists on doing it all on his own. I need you three, as well as Eric and Nell to be his friends and his family. Is that yet a possibility still after all that has happened?"

"You know it is. He is my brother." Sam declared as Deeks nodded and Kensi smiled with a single nod of her own.

Hetty smiled appreciatively, "Good. Well then, that's that, as they say."

"You know, Hetty, one of these days, your luck will run out and these secrets will be your undoing." Sam warned.

"Oh, Sam, I have been around for a very long time. Secrets are an evil necessity in this job we do… you should know that by now." Hetty smiled.

"I do and I don't like it," Sam admitted, "especially when it comes to my partner. He IS still my partner, right?"

"Yes, Mr. Hanna, he is still your partner and the leader of this team… so long as you are in agreement."

"Why wouldn't we be?" Deeks asked.

"Of course!" Kensi confirmed.

"Very well… now we only have to convince him of that. If only it were that simple. Stay close. He is hurting and we all know what happens when he is hurting."

"He runs." Sam stated as he turned and headed down the hall towards his friend's room.


	59. Chapter 59

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Good Sunday to you! Well, I read this over and added a little more that I felt was needed… hopefully I caught any and all mistakes. We are narrowing down even a bit more here today. Getting close… Look forward to hearing from you when you finish reading this next addition.**

Callen slammed the door as he entered his room. None of this would have been happening had Iosif just done what he was supposed to do… end it. Now he was forced to figure out what his future held for him. Where was he supposed to go, what was he supposed to do with the rest of his life. His father was right, he was no good for Alexandra or Jake. Their lives would always be in danger as long as he was involved with them. For that matter, so were Kamran's and Aiden's. The best thing he could do for any of them would be to leave and never look back. He wasn't any good for anyone. Oddly enough, he wasn't prepared for the onslaught of emotion that came with that decision… Breathing had already been a chore with the bruised and cracked ribs… now though he wasn't even sure he could keep up with the pace of his heart beating in his chest… everything felt cold from the inside out. His mind spun with his vision. That mixed with the roaring in his ears left him grabbing for the table to steady himself only to bring it crashing to the floor with him.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Sam had just started down the hall when he heard the crashing noise coming from Callen's room. Hetty, Kensi and Deeks followed from behind as they ran in to find him unconscious on the floor.

"Mr. Deeks, would you please find Marcus… quickly?" Hetty requested as Deeks was already headed out the door.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

After what felt like an interminable amount of time, Marcus finally came out to update them on Callen's condition.

"Well?" Sam asked.

"Well… first of all, he's fine… or he will be with a little rest. He is dealing with a lot of stuff right now on top of his injuries. Physically, he is exhausted. He needs to be eating and drinking more, resting more. Ideally, less stress, but that is unlikely in this case so I would suggest you make your amends and figure this out before he breaks. I don't know what happened prior to this but by all indications this was a good old fashion anxiety attack. I'm not sure how much more he can take… The stubborn fool refused to take anything to help him relax and rest so… I would suggest we check on him often." Marcus stated, looking to Hetty with a nod which she returned knowingly.

"Very well," Hetty stated.

"I would like to go sit with Grisha for a few minutes, I will be taking my leave of you in the morning. I must get back to my children… they know nothing of this business… I need to let them know their father has died…" Marie stated.

"How are you going to explain the fact there is no body?" Deeks asked.

"An unfortunate auto accident that led to a fiery end…" Hetty replied, "Go ahead Marie. I will make us some tea for when you are finished."

"Thank you, my friend." Marie gave a light squeeze to her hand.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

As Marie headed for Callen's room and Hetty for the kitchen, Sam motioned to Deeks and Kensi to follow him out onto the deck. Once there, Sam suggested they walk down to the beach where they could talk privately.

"So, what's up, Sam" Deeks asked.

"I was wondering what you two were thinking in regards to the conversation we walked in on between Hetty and Garrison." Sam stated.

"I don't know, I haven't even had a second to regroup and think about it since this happened. All I can think about is seeing Callen on the floor. How many more times are we going to be left wondering if he is going to survive this mess?" Kensi replied worriedly.

"For one, Callen is going to be fine… just as soon as Sam here man's up and has a chat with him. You two need to air your grievances with one another before it's your undoing!" Deeks insisted.

"Marty's right, Sam. You and Callen need to move past this. He will never stay if he thinks you don't want him here. You do want him to come back, right?" Kensi asked, watching Sam's reaction carefully.

Looking out at the ocean, Sam considered what they asked… "Yes… yes, of course, I do. I just need to know that he isn't going to keep disappearing on us. Kamran doesn't need that."

"That's fair." Deeks agreed.

"What's fair?" Eric asked as he and Nell joined them.

"Everything okay?" Nell asked, "It looked pretty serious."

"No, it's fine. Just worrying about G," Sam answered honestly.

"I know, right? What happened earlier? Eliot said something about an anxiety attack?" Eric asked.

"Yeah, he had just walked in on an argument between Hetty and Garrison." Deeks offered.

"Deeks." Sam warned.

"What? They have a right to know. After all, Hetty did mention their names too."

"Wait, what?" Eric and Nell asked in unison.

Sam rolled his eyes and wiped a hand over his face before explaining the basics of the conversation to the duo.

"Wow! So, Garrison is gone?" Eric asked.

"Didn't he even stick around to see Callen after what just happened? Nell added.

"Nope, haven't seen him since. Far as I know, he's gone… and from all indications, he isn't coming back." Sam replied coldly.

"You've got to be kidding me." Nell stated in shock, "I can't even imagine what that must be doing to Callen… All these years, looking for family and then to finally find his father only to have him reject him? At least he has Alex and Jake."

Looking at the dark expressions on their three team mates faces, Nell and Eric looked at each other in concern.

"Did something happen with Alex?" Nell asked.

"Garrisons last words to his son were to tell him he needed to stay away from Alexandra and Jake because he was no good for them." Kensi whispered, her heart breaking for her friend.

"No Way… that's just cold" Eric stated.

"Yeah, my thoughts exactly." Deeks replied.

"So, what were you saying about Hetty mentioning our names, again?" Nell asked curiously.

"That's the part that I haven't figured out. Hetty has eluded to the fact that this isn't the end of Callen's troubles. Apparently, there is something big that could seriously hurt him and Garrison and Hetty are both in on whatever it is. She wouldn't go into detail but whatever it is has to be huge." Sam offered.

"No kidding. She mentioned that there is a group of agents out there that are keeping a watch out for whatever this is in order to keep Callen safe…" Deeks added.

"AND, it's been out there for nearly forty years… because Callen's mother was aware of it. Garrison made a comment to the fact that Clara would have been very upset had Callen found out… Apparently, Victor and Iosif were aware of it… There was no way either of those men would have been allowed out of there alive… not at the risk of them giving their secret away." Kensi shook her head in frustration, "What do you think it is?"

"Who knows. What I want to know is who are all these other people she mentioned. She told Garrison that "the others" were keeping watch and Callen would be kept safe… Just who are they?" Sam asked.

"Do you think Marie knows? Vance? Gibbs?" Kensi asked.

"I don't know. If they do, they won't be telling us until when and if Hetty decides to include us… Whatever IT is, they made it abundantly clear that Callen was never to know… You all realize that when the day comes and Hetty decided to finally let us in on this… We will be the ones holding the secrets regarding G's past." Sam mentioned.

"You going to be able to do that, Sam? Keep their secret?" Deeks asked.

"Will you?" Sam rebutted, "I'm hoping that it comes to a head long before then. What I do know is, we can't afford to let him leave again. If there is something or someone out there that is capable of hurting him worse than this mess… It's going to have to go through us first… He simply can't do it alone."

"Sam's right. We won't let him… WE are his family and WE will have his back" Kensi affirmed as they all exchanged similar looks of determination.

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The room was dark but for a small light on the bedside table… Marie walked in to find Callen not lying in the bed but sitting on the couch lost in thought…

"You do have a penchant for worrying people, do you not?" Marie teased as she settled herself into a chair across from him.

"Not my intension but, yeah, all I do is cause trouble for everyone." Callen replied without emotion… a fact that concerned her.

"While no one wants to see you hurting… it is a good thing that there are those who feel the need to worry after you. It means you are not alone in this world."

Callen didn't respond and so she continued, "Those who left earlier wanted you to know they would be thinking about you and wished you the best. Anna said she would stop in to see you in a few days… after things settled. They worried that too many people milling around would be upsetting for you." Still he said nothing.

"Grisha Alexsandrovich Nikolaev Callen! You have a group of people out there who want nothing more than to be your family! You have been hurt by some of them in the past, yes, but they want to make amends and start over! You are your own worst enemy! Your mother would have wanted more for you than the solitary life you have convinced yourself you must live. Do you think she would have been happy to know there would be no grandchildren? That you would live your life with no wife to make you smile? No friends to make you laugh? There are those who would have you believe that you need none of that. One of those individuals was my husband and that despicable animal he had working for him… but they were wrong Grisha, very wrong. You were a little boy thrust into a world not of your doing. You asked for none of this and you deserve better than you were given. You are no longer that little boy… you are a grown man! While you may have had much of your life manipulated unknowingly…. You have done many good things… because despite their best efforts, you are a good man, Grisha. You deserve to have a happy life… especially now. I told you once before… On the other side of fear lies freedom. It is time… It is time to let go of your fears of being alone… or perhaps your greater fear is of NOT being alone… because allowing others in would open you up to being hurt… It is time, Grisha… be free…"

Callen slowly lifted his head to look her in the eye… what she saw was the little boy of so long ago… His eyes glistened with tears unshed.

"You will be okay, your mother would be soooo proud of her little boy growing into such a good, smart, and handsome young man…"

"I'm not a young man anymore…" Callen stated with a slight smirk.

"Pah! You are still young man… with much life left to live… Live it, Grisha. Do not fear it. Trust once more in your team. They have fought for you when others have not. They made mistakes and they have fought valiantly to make up for it… Give them a chance… and in doing so, give yourself a chance… yes? I must go now. My children need their mother."

"Wait, Victor. They have no clue…." Callen started.

"It is good. Henrietta took care of everything… she had your little friends make a news reel for me to show them of the fiery demise of their father in an unfortunate car accident," she smiled.

"Of course, she did," he chuckled, "Thank you, Marie… for everything."

"It is what a mother would do for her child… I will always be there for you, Grisha. You stay in touch… promise me."

"I will."

"Very good. Now, you need rest… and the doctor says you are not eating enough. Grisha, we have had this battle before… I will be telling Gibbs to keep me updated on your stubbornness…" she smiled.

"Yes, mam… eat… I get it." Callen smiled… try though he might, he couldn't quite get it to show in his eyes. Truth was, he wasn't quite as certain as she seemed to be that he deserved anything more than what he had…

Marie got up and leaned over to kiss his forehead and pat his cheek before taking her leave. As she opened the door and prepared to leave she glance back once more as the boy she had loved for so long leaned back in the couch with a resigned sigh… any remorse she may have had for killing her husband vanished… he deserved everything he got for hurting so many… yes, her children would mourn but little did they know how much better and safer their lives would be without him.


	60. Chapter 60

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hello! I'm sending this out a little early… oh who am I kidding. It's not like I have a set time of doing this these days. LOL!**

 **So about yesterday's post... here's hoping we don't have that pesky coding problem again today. I have to take it from Word and put it into Notepad BEFORE I put it on fanfic. All fine but yesterday I somehow pasted it into Notepad and then instead of copying it from there I must have carried it on over to fanfic from my word and re-pasted it... UGH... regardless, I fell asleep right after. So a warning for all... never sleep post your stories. HA!**

 **Anyhoo! We are getting down to just the team… How will they do once the rest of the world goes back to their daily lives and it is just them left to put the pieces of the puzzle back in place? I reckon we are going to find out soon.**

 **ADDIE** **: You left me a wonderful review today… and since it won't let me message you, I'm going to leave you a note here in hopes you find it. I love questions. Firstly, NOOOOOOOO, we are not done with this story JUST yet… and NOOOOOOO I'm not going to leave you hanging on the state of the team. I promised I would put them back as I found them… AAALLLMOST. So, hang tight a few more chapters here. NOW… about the nit picky items. LOL I'm going out on a limb and guess that you are not a Deeks fan… HAHAHAHAHAHAHA That's okay… Callen is, was, and always will be my favorite character…. But the team as a whole is a fantastic cast of characters. Deeks has a LOT of potential… here. I'm not thrilled with how the show took hostage of his character and made him and Kensi into a soap opera. But that is neither here nor there. I love their characters. Okay, that said. Callen had left… no intention of coming back. He wouldn't keep that house. He is not materialistic in the least. Things, house included, are not that important to him. He cares about Deeks and Kensi… and they were starting a life together. Empty house, new couple needing a place to build into a home for a future family. Easy peasy. You didn't mention anything else soooooo. Yeah. Ha.**

 **One thing to remember about my stories. When I started with "G Callen Doesn't Do Christmas", I had no idea where I was headed. I basically created my own running series… each story is connected in some way to the one before, if only through character development. So, while you may not care for a character on the show now… you may find you like them here. Maybe not and that's okay too. I like the story potential here for a Deek and Callen friendship. So much alike and yet SOOOOOOOO VERY different.**

They looked up as she entered the living room where everyone had settled for the moment.

"How is he?" Gibbs asked.

Marie shook her head, "not good… but if you stay the course, he will be better. Do not lose hope. Do not give up as I fear he has…"

Gibbs just sighed as he started to pull himself to his feet when Parker stopped him, "Let us go. Eliot says we are going to leave tomorrow too…"

With a nod the three remaining members of the Leverage team headed down the hall towards the library.

Hetty frowned as she realized she never had the chance to ask Garrison about his connection with Parker. It was obvious it was one sided as Parker showed no signs of knowing the man previously… She would need to do some research on the issue. She didn't like not knowing things… especially in regards to Callen and his safety.

"Hetty, you okay?" Gibbs asked curiously.

"Yes, yes, I'm fine, just concerned for Mr. Callen," she replied with a smile, tucking the concern away for another day, "Some tea, Marie?" she offered.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

After giving a soft knock and receiving no reply, Eliot opened the door anyway.

"Hey man. Wasn't yesterday enough? I thought we talked about scaring people, already." He joked.

"Yeah, sorry about that." Callen replied distractedly, "Look you can tell everyone out there I'm fine and I'm not going anywhere so they don't need to keep coming in here to check on me… I would prefer they didn't."

Eliot sighed and sat down across from him while Parker plopped herself right down next to him, "We are just worried about you," she offered.

"Well don't be. I'm fine, according to Marcus."

"You don't seem to be very happy about it… that's a good thing. I know I'm happy. I don't want anything bad to happen to you." Parker offered.

"She's right, man. Everyone out there was messed up when you crashed earlier. I just wanna say that I appreciate having had the chance to work with you. Eliot was right, you're a good guy. I hope we get to work with you again in the future… although maybe not quite so wild a ride next time." Hardison grinned.

Callen forced a chuckle, "Thanks Hardison. You did good. You gave Eric a run for his money… Eliot's lucky to have you on his team. Thanks for everything you did. You too Parker. You take care of Eliot for me? He needs looking after."

"Look who's talking." Eliot grumbled before giving Hardison and Parker a nod toward the door. Once they gave their final goodbyes, Eliot and Callen both sat on the couch in silence.

"Been one hell of a ride, Callen." Eliot stated absently.

"Yes, it has. I appreciate all you have done." Callen responded.

"I'm not looking for a thanks, brother. I will always be there when you need me, just as I know you will do the same. No thanks needed, no questions asked." Eliot returned with a sigh, "So, what's your plans now?"

"Well, I'm not going to Disney," Callen quipped and Eliot chuckled in response.

"Ah come on… happiest place on earth? Might not be such a bad idea. You could use a little happiness in your life."

Callen simply sighed as he laid his head back and closed his eyes.

"He really did a number on that head of yours, didn't he?" Eliot growled.

"He wasn't entirely wrong, Spencer."

"The hell he wasn't! Callen! You need to get out of your own head. You didn't do anything to deserve the crap you went through. You are NOT the reason Kamran and her brother were on that list but you ARE the reason they are safe today. YOU are the reason Sam is still alive. YOU are the reason your dad wasn't killed… You are a brilliant agent… maybe not as good as me but hey." Eliot nudged him for effect.

When Callen didn't respond, "Damn it, Callen! What is it going to take to get through to that thick head of yours that you have a chance at something good here! These people care about you. When you were missing, they were going out of their minds trying to find you. They risked their jobs on an unsanctioned mission to save your ass. I mean, come on G, what more do you need to prove they give a crap about you? Why are you being so stubborn about forgiving them and giving them another chance? I don't get it, man! That's not like you."

Callen took a few moments to try and process what exactly his thoughts were in regards to the team… but the more he thought the more frustrated he became… How did he make these people understand that this had NOTHING to do with what happened on that mission five years ago? That this was about the fact that they deserved better than having HIM as a member of their team let alone the team lead! They weren't the ones needing forgiveness… he was. He was the problem.

"Go home, Eliot. I will be fine… whatever happens here." Callen replied.

"You screw this up for yourself and I will come back here and kick your ass, myself." Eliot yelled, "This team has done nothing but try and make things right with you and you have shut them down at every turn. I get that this mess with Iosif might have gotten in the way of that and you didn't want them getting hurt. Which, by the way, is just one more reason why I am confused as to why you insist on being so obstinate here. You care enough to keep them safe but treat them like crap when they try to return the favor… What the hell is going on with you, Callen?!"

"It's none of your… Go home Spencer! This isn't your fight!" Callen tensed.

"I'm making it my business!"

Having had enough and knowing that Eliot was unlikely to leave until he got an answer, Callen got up and began pacing.

Eliot shook his head, "Come on, man. Explain to me what is going on in that head of yours."

"That's just it, Spencer, I. DON'T. KNOW! I have no clue what is going on. What I think… What I feel… Who I trust… I. Don't. Know! Alright? Just BACK OFF!" Callen's voice rose to a seldom heard yell. Always one to stay in control and even toned… Eliot stood back and watched as his friend sat back down on the couch and leaned forward with his head in his hands attempting to catch his breath.

"G, it's okay. No one can blame you for being confused right now. But you need to at least talk to them… let them know… let them help you figure it out. It's not going to happen overnight. They know that. Look, if it doesn't work out here you can always come join us." Eliot offered.

"Oh yeah, I'm sure Nate would just love that!" Callen replied with a genuine chuckle this time.

"Yeah, well… A lot has changed since you first met. He has a completely different take on you as a person and before you smart off… He is very impressed with you. That's saying something with Nate. Just know you aren't alone… no matter what you try to convince yourself… I'm a call away… if you need to talk."

Callen stood then and offered Eliot his hand, "Thanks, Eliot, You're a good friend. Stay safe out there."

"You too, man." Eliot replied, leaving his friend alone once more.

Callen couldn't handle anymore conversation for the time being. He was more than done. Locking his bedroom door, he laid down on the bed in an effort to shut the world out for a while.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Walking back out, Eliot found the others milling through the kitchen working on supper.

"I think it might be wise to give him his space at this point. He is pretty much imploding at the moment. Just take it slow… With everything that has happened… I don't think he knows what he's doing right now." Eliot stated. I told him we were leaving in the morning. I don't expect we will see him before then so I'm telling you all now… this is your last chance with him. Don't screw it up…"


	61. Chapter 61

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: One of the chapters you have been waiting for… I hope it meets with your approval. It's a start…**

The next morning, Eliot, Hardison, Parker and Marie left early for the airport. All that was left sitting around the breakfast table was the LA Team, Gibbs, Marcus and Hetty. Life was slowly slipping back into the norm.

"So, how long will you be staying, Jethro" Hetty asked as she softly blew over her teacup to cool its contents.

"Till Leon tells me otherwise. Until further notice, I am, for all tense and purpose, the acting Assistant Director of the OSP." he replied.

"So, Callen does have a job to come back to, right?" Sam asked.

"Mr. Hanna, I told you as much, did I not?" Hetty answered.

"Well, yeah, I mean, I was just surprised we didn't hear it from Leon, himself." Sam stated.

"Would it make you feel better, Mr. Hanna, to hear it from the director?" Hetty asked, looking over the rim of her glasses at him.

Sam chuckled as he rolled his eyes then, "No, Hetty. That wasn't my point and you know it."

"Well then, you will just have to take my word for it." Hetty finished as the kids entered the room.

"Morning everyone" Kamran smiled as she gave her dad a hug before sitting down at the table and grabbing a cinnamon roll Hetty had baked that morning.

"Good morning, Miss Hanna… Aiden… What, pray tell, have you two planned for the day?" Hetty greeted with a smile.

"Well, I was hoping to spend some time with Uncle Callen today… he hasn't left has he?" she asked in a sudden panic.

"No, dear, he is still here." Hetty replied, reassuringly.

"Good. Marty? Could you and Eric maybe take us surfing today?" she asked with a smile.

"Of course. We will take any excuse to hit the waves. Would the ladies like to join us?"

"We would, indeed, wouldn't we Nell?" Kensi smiled as Nell nodded her agreement.

"Well, now. Sounds like it's just the three of us left." Gibbs said looking knowingly at Sam and Hetty.

"Oh, I'm sure we can find something to amuse ourselves…" Sam replied.

"Sounds like a plan. We will meet back here for lunch… I think we will have simple sandwiches and chips with iced tea today… perhaps a fruit salad for dessert." Hetty offered up as the kids hurried through their breakfast so they could head down to the beach.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Gibbs, Hetty and Sam were sitting on the deck watching the others play in the water when Callen entered the dining room. He debated taking the tray Hetty had left for him to the kitchen and returning to his room to read but knew it was only a matter of time before they were tapping at his door once more. Grabbing a cup of coffee, he decided instead to join the three senior members of the OSP on the deck.

"Good morning, Mr. Callen! How are you feeling on this fine day? I presume you found the breakfast tray I left you…"

"Yes, thank you, Hetty." Callen replied quietly.

"Sit down, before you fall down, G" Sam stated pulling a chair over for him.

Callen didn't argue. He hated how impossibly tired he felt. Slowly he lowered himself into the waiting chair and took a sip of his coffee as he leaned back.

No one spoke. They seemed lost as to what to say and Callen offered them no clue as to what he was thinking. Finally, Gibbs spoke up… "Rest up Callen… You and me? We're going for a walk later…"

Callen glance over at him and merely gave a nod but said nothing. He knew it was inevitable… just as his talk with Eliot had been. The two people in his life that never held back but said exactly what they were thinking… no fear of what he might say or do. He appreciated it…

"In the meantime, Jethro… might you fancy a game of chess? Or would you prefer… checkers?" Hetty smirked as the man scowled at her but accepted the invite.

Once alone the two men just sat looking out at the ocean, each lost in their own thoughts.

Finally, Sam couldn't hold it in any longer. He had paced the floor all night thinking things over and deciding what to say and how to say it, "I'm sorry. I should have known you would never have turned on one of your own. I did know. I was in a bad place. After losing Michelle… then this happened with Deeks. I just, I don't know… Kensi was so broken over Deeks, I guess it brought back too many bad memories and then you were gone and the kids were devastated all over again. I'm sorry, man."

Callen listened quietly, taking in everything he said, looking for the sincerity of his words, "I tried my best, you know… to save her." He whispered, a rare show of emotion clouding his features.

"Wait, What? Do you think I blame you for what happened to my wife?" Sam asked, shocked at his friend's revelation. He expected anger but not this. "You did everything you could to find her, to save her. I know that. I only wish I had stopped to realize just how much you did for me and the kids… and Michelle before it was too late. I'm sorry about that. I am also sorry for the fact that I never stopped to think about what losing Michelle meant to you. We were family… you were a part of that family. I'm sorry I didn't stop to consider your pain and your loss."

Silence, once again, fell between them.

"Where do we go from here?" Sam asked.

There it was again, the look of uncertainty, Sam wondered if there was any way he could keep Callen from leaving.

"I don't know."

"I said I was sorry, Callen. What more do you want?"

"Seriously, Sam, do you honestly believe I am so petty that I'm holding a grudge over what happened five years ago?!" Callen questioned, his tone, one of exasperation.

"Then what? What's the issue here?" Sam asked, confused.

Callen sighed heavily, grabbing his ribs for the pain it caused. "I need to know if you…" Callen fought with the frustration of what he needed to ask. Sam saw his struggle and waited patiently.

"I'm not who you thought I was. Who am I kidding, I'm not who I thought I was. There are a lot of things I have had to do in the past before we ever even met not to mention the last five years… a lot of which goes against anything you or Kensi and especially Deeks would be comfortable with… I'm just saying…"

"Callen, Stop!" Sam interrupted, "I get it, you did what you had to."

"No. I chose the job. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not sorry for that. It's a job that needs done. I didn't enjoy it, but if not for what I did… many more people, innocent people would have died…" Callen argued.

"Callen…"

"Sam! You called me a monster, a glorified killer. Kensi and Marie did as well. You weren't wrong. Knowing what you know now…"

"We were though. Victor and whoever else manipulated you… that's on them." Sam defended.

Callen sighed and gingerly got to his feet and walked to the railing, "Yes, my entire life has been dictated and controlled but I'm no child. I can make my own decisions despite what you all seem to think. I knew what I was signing up for. If you can't accept that, then… The truth is, there is so much more you don't know and don't need to know, but if this much offends you then you've answered your own question and we are done here. I can't change who I am, regardless of who trained or created me to be what I am."

"You were, are and always will be, my brother. Get that through your thick head. But don't you dare try to convince me that you are okay with what you did as a Renegade. I saw what it did to you. I get that it's something that needs done but no one person should be expected to do what you had to do all the time. It's not okay… not for you." Sam argued, "Look, we want you back, all of us. Team lead."

"Sam, no!" he turned to look at him.

"Don't start. The pay ain't worth all the paperwork. You are welcome to it." Sam grinned.

Callen didn't respond.

"I just need to know one thing, Callen. I need to know you're going to stay this time… no more of this running. This is your home. We are your family." Sam pushed.

"I can't promise there aren't going to be times I need to deal with things on my own. It's not always going to be cases I can involve you in." Callen felt his chest tighten at the thoughts that they would never be able to accept him for who he was now… who he had always been despite his best efforts to be something else entirely for their benefit.

"Callen, this Lone Wolf thing isn't working for anyone, especially you. Those are the times you nearly get killed… every time. I get what you are saying but you need to let us in so we can have your back." Sam tried again.

"I… I can try. I make no promises. You need to understand, I'm not like the rest of you. I wish I could be but I'm not and I never can be."

"I know." Sam replied putting a hand on his shoulder, "we'll try to keep that in mind."

They were both quiet for a moment before Callen spoke again.

"You realize, this may be a moot point, right?" Callen added, "Leon hasn't exactly offered me my job back. There are things that I need to figure out before I could answer him even if he did."

"You mean Hetty?" Sam asked, feeling the hope of a moment ago begin to waiver.

"For one, yeah… I hear what you are saying Sam, I do… I just need some time, that's all." Callen said looking Sam in the eye for the first time during the entire conversation… something that normally wasn't a problem for Callen.

"Okay, fair enough… but I'm not going anywhere until we figure this out… none of us are. You are too important to this team to give you even the slightest chance at sneaking away while our backs are turned and don't give me that look G. You know dang well that's your go to plan at times like this. Not this time… You hear me G? Not. This. Time." Sam stated as he headed down to the beach to join the others.

Callen watched him go. With a sigh he turned and headed back into the house. He knew what Sam said was true. If he had an option of staying there or taking off until he figured things out for himself… he would choose the latter. That was simply his way. He also knew that Sam was right. He needed to figure this thing out and he owed it to everyone to stick around until he did… until they did. Suddenly fatigued by it all he slowly made his way back to his room where he would stay until Jethro came to get him.


	62. Chapter 62

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Hello. Wow! We are soooooo close to the end now. Just a few short chapters to go. Will they get through to him? He has talked with Deeks and Kensi, he has spoken with Eliot and Marie… Now it's time to hear what Gibbs has to say. They are running out of time and he is running short on patience. Can they reach him before his need to be alone get's too great? I hope so, because two chapters offers little opportunity.**

He knocked once before opening the door and letting himself in. "You awake?"

"Would it matter if I wasn't?" Callen mumbled, sitting up.

"Not really. Grab a jacket and let's take that walk." Gibbs said.

"Gibbs… if it's all the same… there's nothing you can say that I haven't already heard so can we just not do this?" Callen pleaded.

"Jacket, walk, now" Gibbs replied heading for the door leading out to the side yard, leaving it open in expectation of Callen's joining him.

With a groan, Callen did as was ordered, and followed him out, closing the door behind him.

Aside from the reasoning for it, the walk itself did him good. He breathed in the salty air as deeply as his bruised ribs would allow and concentrated on the feel of the sand beneath his feet to help ground him as he waited for Gibbs to start.

"So?" Callen finally asked.

"So?" Gibbs replied.

"Aren't you going to start railing on me for how I screwed up?" Callen asked.

"Nope." Gibbs replied.

Callen furrowed his brows and looked over at his friend and mentor.

"Then why are we out here?" he asked.

They walked a bit further before Gibbs finally replied, "Callen, as you said earlier, you have already heard it all before. You don't need me to tell you how much this team cares about you… or that they would do anything to get you back. You certainly don't need me to tell you how they are much more a family to you than your own. You have no doubt been reminded that they didn't have to come in there and get you and yet they chose of their own accord to join that fight… that Hetty called in all the favors she possibly had coming to her in order to save you… despite the fact that you made it very clear how you felt about them… and I know that none of this means anything when you have convinced yourself that you don't deserve any of it because of what those bastards did and said to you. Callen, what Victor and his cronies have done to you all these years is nothing short of despicable but it doesn't define who you are as a person. You are an incredible agent but you are also an incredible person. You care about people, you fight for those who can't fight for themselves… Whatever Victor and Iosif and whoever else was attempting to create using you… they failed because nothing they created would have even half the heart that you have. You are who you are despite them and their plans. They may have controlled the things that happened in your life but YOU controlled how you dealt with them. Don't let them win now by giving up." Gibbs voice was very matter of fact as he continued walking and never once looked at Callen.

Callen said nothing at first… just worked to keep up with his friend… when that got to be too much, he slowed his pace and mulled over the words he had spoken. Finally, he came to a stop and simply sat down in the sand.

Noticing Callen was no longer by his side he turned to look back and found him sitting in the sand with his knees pulled to his chest. He quickly turned back as images of another walk on another beach passed through his mind… "Callen! Are you okay? Do I need to get Marcus?"

Realizing the thoughts going through Gibbs head of their time in Romania, Callen quickly raised his hand up to put his friend at ease, "I'm fine. Just tired. I need a second to catch my breath. Just give me a minute and I'll be ready to go again."

"Enough walking for one day, you need to rest. Soon as you're ready we'll head back" Gibbs replied.

"Sounds good. Gibbs…", Callen began before stopping to rethink what he wanted to convey to this man who had been his friend for so long and stood by his side through so much, "I don't want to let them win… but I can't…" Callen shook his head and looked down at the sand he was running through his fingers.

"You can't what, Callen?" Gibbs urged.

"I can't help thinking they were right about a few things." Callen said.

"Like what?"

"The killing… I'm good at it. There were times when I almost reveled in the planning and the carrying out of the act. Iosif wasn't the only one who made it an artform. I can kill someone right in front of you and you wouldn't even know it was me that did it. I am every bit the monster that Iosif was. How can I ever think of going back to working for the OSP or any agency for that matter knowing the kind of person I truly am. While Sam and Deeks and Kensi were busy questioning their suspects, I was torturing mine! What makes you think they would really want to work with me again KNOWING the demons I carry inside. How could I DO those things if I were such a good person at heart? Sure, Sam says he wants me back that I am still his brother but the truth is, he is refusing to even think it through because he might realize I'm right… that Victor was right… I'm not fit to do anything else." Callen pushed himself up and began walking away.

"You're wrong, Callen." Gibbs yelled, "The fact that you even think about what you did as being cruel or wrong… that proves you aren't the evil they claim you are. You still have a conscience. That is something Iosif NEVER had! The fact that it is eating you up inside proves you to be better than them! But let's get something straight here… I looked into your kills. Victor was right in the people he sent you after… including those two agents."

Callen stopped in his tracks at the mention of the two agents.

"yeah, I know. Callen, they had turned. They were selling information… valuable information… information that would have cost many of our military and civilians their lives. Had you not stopped them when you did, there is no telling how many people would have died. Your kills were all above board. I think you know that too… Doing a job that protects the lives of innocent is far different from what Iosif was doing. YOU. ARE. NOT. IOSIF. You hear me, Callen! What about all those agents you saved that otherwise would have died at the hands of the enemy had you not chosen to step up and before you pretend to know nothing about it… you were spotted at least once… We know it was you… You want to prove them wrong? You want to prove yourself wrong? You stay and fight. You return to a team that has your back. It will take time to find your new normal but it will come! There is more to you than these past five years!"

Callen turned just enough so that he could see Gibbs… the guilt he carried showed on every feature. His uncertainty was unmistakable. He said nothing as he turned back and continued walking on down the beach.

"Damn it." Gibbs muttered as he followed along behind at a distance.

Eventually Gibbs found himself walking side by side again though nothing more was said until they had nearly reached the house, "Looks like it's lunch time." Gibbs stated climbing the steps to the deck.

"Go home, Gibbs. Look, I will be fine whatever happens here, and I will always be grateful for your friendship."

"You sure about any of that?" he asked skeptically, concern churning in his gut, "because I've gotta tell you Callen… I'm not."

Callen turned to give him an exasperated look.

"What I'm saying is, you are allowing your general lack of trust in people and the garbage Iosif spewed at you to stop you from listening to who and what really matters. Those people in there? They matter, Callen! You! You matter to them! To me!"

"Just what makes you think they're going to want me here? I wasn't exactly nice when I left here this last time. They have every right to want me gone."

"Yet, they came to get you anyway. You are here today partly because they were there that day," Gibbs replied, "They didn't have to be, they chose to be."

"Fine, I get it! You made your point, your job here is done. Go home, Jethro… I meant what I said, I will be fine regardless of what happens here." Callen looked back out at the ocean as he attempted to swallow the lump rising in his throat, "You are a good friend and if you… ever… need me, I will be there." Callen turned and looked him in the eye, "but… you have got to stop trying to save me… sometimes people are simply beyond the ability to save."

Gibbs stepped up to the man in front of him and put one hand on his shoulder and the other hand he wrapped around the back of his neck, forcing him to maintain eye contact, "You listen to me. We have been friends for a long time… In that time, you have become part of my family. Family never gives up on family. So, if you don't want me worrying about you, don't give me reason to." Gibbs spoke from the heart, taking Callen by surprise.

Gibbs gave the back of his head a gentle tap to make his point, "Now, don't even think of sneaking off… Marcus said you need to eat and you are going to march yourself in there and eat something. You hear me?"

Callen hated the fact that Gibbs knew him so well, "Fine" he grumbled as he followed him the rest of the way into the house.


	63. Chapter 63

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, two chapters left after this one. The chat you've been waiting for… Can he and Hetty find common ground? Keep reading… keep reviewing. Thank you all for both!**

"Just in time!" Hetty stated, taking in the appearance of the two men coming in the door. Gibbs gave her a pointed look before grabbing a plate and heading for the counter where the food was. Callen moved through and got his plate before sitting down at the table. Marcus sat next to him, "You okay?"

"I'm fine." Callen grumbled.

"Good, after lunch we are going to go change those bandages and check the wounds for further infection. Here are your antibiotics and a nice big glass of water."

"Great. Can't wait" Callen scowled taking the pills from the man and swallowing them as he downed the glass of water.

"You really are a bad patient" Marcus mumbled as he bit into his sandwich.

"So, fire me," Callen retorted as he took a bite of his own, realizing he was a bit hungrier than he thought…

Kamran found her way over and sat on his other side, "Hi, Uncle Callen. You feeling okay?"

"Yeah, I'm feeling fine. I saw you surfing out there today. You are really getting good."

"You think so?" she beamed, "Hey, Kensi and Nell are going to work on self-defense

after our lunch settles… you wanna watch?" she asked hopefully.

"oh, uhmmm, sure, maybe. I think I'm going to lie down for a bit after lunch but if I wake up in time… I'll be sure to come find you." Callen stumbled.

"oh, okay. I mean, if you don't feel like it, I understand." she answered honestly.

A few more bites and Callen found himself feeling full and more than ready to escape to his room. At his best he wasn't great with socializing… now he was barely able to contain his frustration with everyone being in his space… yet he couldn't bring himself to pack up and leave either… and for that he couldn't understand why.

Marcus finished his lunch before heading back to see to Callen's wounds. He was pleased to find they had gotten no worse and if anything, they were looking much better.

"They keep healing at this rate then I should think by the end of another week and you won't have to mess with these bandages any further. There will definitely be scars I'm afraid but at least we seem to have warded off the infection and a hospital visit." Marcus stated as he finished up, "you get some rest and I will see you at supper."

"Way to be optimistic" he mumbled under his breath as the door closed.

Callen threw his shirt over the back of a chair as he laid down on the couch and closed his eyes, surprised to feel himself drifting off to sleep just shortly after.

What surprised him even more was when he woke up and it was dark out. He had actually slept his way through the rest of the day. He suspected Marcus had something to do with it and no doubt Hetty had put him up to it… if it wasn't for the fact that it got him out of having to deal with everyone that afternoon, he'd be angrier… but the truth was, he felt better for having had the sleep. He might actually let Marcus live… but not before messing with him first.

Sitting up and looking around he found a note from Hetty letting him know there was a plate in the fridge should he find himself hungry when he woke up.

Grabbing a button up shirt he slipped it on, not bothering to button it and headed for the kitchen. The house was quiet and a glance at the clock showed it to be near midnight. Shaking his head, he opened the fridge and pulled out the plate Hetty had saved for him. She had filled it with roast beef and potatoes and carrots along with a small bowl of salad. While his dinner heated, he grabbed a glass and filled it twice with water as he swallowed the latest dose of antibiotics Marcus had also left for him.

Sitting down at the table he began eating his food while letting his mind wander back to the many meals he had eaten alone over the past few years, though the food was seldom as good as what Hetty cooked. He did like her cooking. Once finished, he washed and dried the plate and put it all away.

"You remembered." Hetty stated as she watched him from the door.

"If you dirty it, clean it and put it away." Callen recited the lesson Hetty had drilled into him from the first day he had come to live with her as a boy.

"Indeed. I was sitting in my room reading and thought I could do with a cup of tea before turning in for the night. Would you join me?" She asked, working her way into the kitchen.

"Yeah, sure, why not." He answered, leaning against the counter watching her prepare the tea pot and tray. Hetty couldn't help noticing the angry scars that surrounded the bandages that she knew full well hid even more of the same and it bothered her though she refused to allow it to show.

"Let's take this to the library and you can put a small fire in the fireplace. It's so relaxing with a proper cup of tea."

"Sure." Callen agreed as he turned and headed back to his room to get the fire built while she prepared the tray of tea and biscuits.

It's didn't take him long and he was sitting and waiting for her when she arrived.

She set the tray on the small table sitting between them.

They sat, sipping their drinks in the quiet, listening to the flames as they skittered across the wood.

"I thought, perhaps, we could discuss your return to NCIS." Hetty offered.

"My return?" Callen asked with his brow raised, "I hadn't heard anything from Leon suggesting I even have a job to return to." he stated as he took another sip of his tea.

"Well, if you would rather wait until you speak with Leon, we can do that" Hetty replied, "You should know that I WILL be your supervisor once more."

Callen said nothing for a moment as he allowed himself to become lost in the flickering flames of the fire…

"Perhaps it is too soon after the harrowing events of the past several days… We can revisit this another time, if you prefer." Hetty added softly.

Callen turned to look at her, "No, we can't. Five years is long enough, don't you think? It's time to deal with this… find closure for all concerned and move on."

"What does that mean? Find closure… move on? Is that it? You're leaving once again?"

Callen gave a long sigh, "I'm tired Hetty. I'm tired of trying to figure out what you all want… who I'm supposed to be."

"We just want you to be you." Hetty answered simply.

"I don't even know who that is. What I do know, is that who I was five years ago wasn't good enough. You didn't trust me. You didn't trust that I wouldn't hurt one of our own. You never questioned my guilt! Why? After everything we have been through. We were supposed to be family. If that's family… I don't want it." Callen fought hard to lock down his emotions, to hide his insecurities that were flooding, unbidden, to the surface.

"Callen… my boy…"

"No, Hetty. I'm not one of your minions. I'm not afraid of you. You can't intimidate me into doing what you want me to do anymore."

"Mr. Callen! I do not have, nor have I ever had, MINIONS." Hetty responded, her voice a note or two higher than normal, "and I have no intention of intimidating you."

"What is it you are expecting then, if I come back?" Callen asked, almost amused by her response.

"Every member of this team has apologized repeatedly for what happened. The better question may be, what are you expecting?" Hetty returned.

Once again, Callen rolled his eyes in frustration, "What is it with you people? You think this is all about one mission, five years ago!"

"and isn't it?" Hetty asked, taken back.

"NO!... not entirely…" he answered, fighting to control the pain.

"Then what, Mr. Callen, is this about?"

He looked away, trying to collect his thoughts.

"I… I don't…" he began and then faltered.

"I am sorry, Grisha. What more can I say? What more can we do… but say we are sorry?"

"You're sorry… but you aren't sure what for…" Callen wasn't asking.

"What is it you want to hear?" Hetty asked, her own frustration beginning to show. "They were wrong not to ask you what happened and I was wrong not to stop the accusations… for not stopping this entire debacle from occurring in the first place. You will never know how much I regret those decisions, Mr. Callen."

He turned then to face her, his gaze intense, "I don't care about what happened five years ago, Hetty."

"I am asking you again, then. What is it you need to hear, dear boy? What is it that torments you so?" Hetty was growing more concerned by the moment.

When Callen didn't respond, she continued, "You know Mr. Callen, I am not the only one concerned over your emotional and mental well-being. You have mentioned to more than one person that you were never supposed to come home that day. Perhaps I should call someone in for you to talk to about this…"

That caught Callen's attention and when he answered, his voice grew deep and threatening, "You even think of calling Nate and I…"


	64. Chapter 64

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Here we go again! Hetty and Callen's conversation continues. One chapter after this and … well, I don't know. It's been such a crazy and unexpected ride! We are so close and yet so far… will Hetty's words bring the transformation they so badly need? I'll be waiting to hear what you think. I can't believe we are already nearing the end… wow.**

"Fine, it doesn't have to be Nate… it can be someone else…" Hetty interrupted before Callen cut her off as well.

"Let me rephrase, you so much as pick up that phone and I'm gone…"

"Very well… but you can't go on like this. You were so set on dying that you HAD no future… and now… now that you do… you are at a loss. Quite understandable, don't you agree?" Hetty reasoned.

Callen thought for a moment… trying to find the words that would explain even a part of what was going on in his head.

"You and I both know what it is to keep secrets and the damage it ultimately causes. We both have a lot of skeletons roaming in our closets. We carry secrets we can never reveal… some not even to each other," he gave her a knowing look, "You have to realize that this team is not cut from the same cloth as we are. They can't understand the things we have done… I have done."

"Sam has done many things in his time in the military…"

"Not the same and you know it. Hetty, you have no idea all the things I have done…" Callen remarked.

"What is it you need from me? she asked, "what will bring you home?"

He struggled to find the words to explain… to make her understand… he set his tea on the tray and leaned forward with his head in his hands…

His response nearly broke her heart, "I don't know anymore. I'm not sure there is a way back for me. Maybe they were right not to trust me. I've been thinking… back to the day you took me out of the foster care system. I thought how you had saved me… but Hetty, maybe not everyone can be saved. Maybe not everyone is meant to have a family. Maybe it's too late for me… for this team. You have told us time and again that we can't save them all… Maybe I'm one of those. Maybe I can't be saved."

Hetty placed her own tea on the tray now and moved to sit on the ottoman positioned in front of her boy. She gently touched his hand and pulled it away from his face… she felt him tense at first and then relax as he allowed her to take his hand in her small one and looked into her eyes.

She smiled, "I remember that day as if it were yesterday. I saw such promise in you… and not as a future agent as you may wish to think, but as a human being… the way you protected and cared for the other foster children. You had such spunk! Then as an agent… team lead. Mr. Callen, I am shocked as to how you have been able to ignore the amount of people whose lives you have impacted and who have maintained a great deal of respect for you and for all you have done for them. Sam, Kensi, Marty, Nell and especially Eric, respect you, worry about you and they paid dearly for their mistakes. There is no doubt they care for you. No one was forced into coming to save you and your father. It was all voluntary. Shouldn't that answer your concerns? Maybe you feel what happened five years ago is irrelevant but I happen to disagree. I have watched this team rise up and carry on the work that needed done while never allowing there to be a replacement to permanently fill your space. I have watched them agonize over the mess which that one mission created. I have watched first hand as Sam fought his own demons regarding this… being angry with you for leaving and fiercely protective of you all at the same time. Don't for one second believe they won't welcome you back."

"But Hetty, as much as you and I attempt to keep the past where it belongs… in the past, mine refuses to stay buried. You have seen first-hand their reaction to what I've been doing these past five years… who I've become or what I reverted back to being. That's only the tip of the iceberg. I'm not sure they can deal with much more of my past."

"You underestimate them… you always have." Hetty smiled and patted his hand.

Callen thought a moment before retracting his hand, "You underestimate just how much I've done for 'the agency'."

The well-trained agent in her helped Hetty hide the very deep concern that welled within her at the thoughts of all they had required him to do.

"Perhaps, Mr. Callen but I know YOU… I know your heart… and I know that whatever was required of you was above board. You may walk a fine line between right and wrong sometimes but you never cross it… and I don't believe you ever will."

Callen leaned back in his chair and looked at the small woman in front of him. She had such faith in him… why? After everything…

Hetty noticed that the lost look that seemed a permanent fixture these days had yet to leave his eyes… She was about to continue when Callen chose to change the subject.

"So, I take it he did, in fact, leave town?" he asked.

"Your father?" Hetty asked.

"Garrison, yes" Callen answered, ignoring the reference.

"mmmhm." She pursed her lips and nodded shortly, "yes" she replied as she accepted her cup of tea and took a quick sip, "yes, shortly after you returned to your room… are you having regrets?" she asked then.

Callen chuckled though no humor could be heard in it, "Oh, Hetty… I have plenty of regrets but sending Garrison packing isn't one of them."

Hetty watched him closely, "I see." was all she said in response.

"I'm tired of pretending we have any kind of relationship. He isn't my Father. He stopped being that when I was four years old." He added, his anger rising the more he considered it.

"He had little choice back then." Hetty offered in his defense.

"Don't start with the whole, 'it was for my safety'. Maybe when I was four that might have flown but now? You all need to stop. He has had opportunity after opportunity to build a relationship with me… with Alex and Jake," Callen shook his head with frustration, "He disappears every single time for months even years on end. I'm done, Hetty. I'm not a child. I don't need a family anymore. I've done well without one this long…"

"Well, some might argue that point…" Hetty replied then offered a small smile in response to his scowl, "Speaking of Alexandra and Jake…"

"What about them?" Callen looked up.


	65. Chapter 65

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: This is it! The last chapter. It's been a LONG time coming. I want to thank you all for being about THE BEST fanfiction readers out there. I have appreciated all the notes of encouragement and the open conversations chatting about the story… where the characters were headed and what you thought should happen. I hope you were able to see where I tucked some of your ideas in here and there… some I had already written in and you were just right on the money with your thoughts. Thank you… I hope you enjoy this final chapter and epilogue. I hope you got the answers you were hoping for. I pray I was able to connect all the dots. Just remember. My stories are an ongoing saga. Most can be read as stand alone (minus these past four)… but they are all still connected… leaving the opportunity open to revisit events that have happened previously… build on them. Wow… (takes deep breath)… okay. Enjoy!**

"What about Alex and Jake?" Callen asked defensively.

"Have you thought anymore about spending some time with them?"

"Hetty, if there is one thing that Garrison got right, it's that I am no good for them. I will never be able to out run my past. It's not fair to put them in harm's way because of it. Besides, if Alex ever found out what I have been doing for the past five years she would never want me anywhere near her son. Quite frankly, I'm a little surprised Sam hasn't put more limitations on my time with his kids, considering how much danger I have brought into his life." Callen replied.

"I happen to disagree with your entire argument. You encouraged Alex and her son to look into training for self-defense and they have done that… quite extensively over the past little while and they are doing very well. It could be argued that they are safer with you IN their lives than out of them… as long as you are near them, you are able to protect them. Sam is able to protect his family and he has enemies as well. We all do. We watch out for one another. If someone dares to challenge the safety of one, they receive the wrath of all. Strength in numbers, Mr. Callen." Hetty admonished as again she took his hand in her own.

Callen stared at her for a moment before commenting, "You've been in contact with them? You've been keeping track of them?" he asked in surprise.

"Well, of course I have. Did you think I wouldn't? Despite everything you may think, Mr. Callen, I have always had your best interests at heart. You are the nearest thing I will every have to a son. What matters to you, matters to me." Hetty admitted softly.

Callen could almost swear that he noted a slight blush on her cheeks as he looked into her eyes, "I know that… now…" he replied quietly in return. Callen knew that there were still secrets to be uncovered. He couldn't understand her reasoning for continuing to keep things from him but he was certain of one thing and that was Hetty honestly meant no harm in it. That said, he would not stop until he had all the answers… and he prayed he would not be disappointed in what he found in regards to Hetty's roll in any of it…

"You have been put through so much in your life… more than anyone should ever have to face… but you are stronger because of it. You rise like the phoenix from its ashes every time your enemy believes you defeated. You must NOT allow this to defeat you… You must not let Iosif Romanoff and Victor Pavlenko to have the legacy of bringing down and destroying the legend that is Agent G Callen, Lone Wolf, known only as Ghost to his enemies… Rise, Mr. Callen… RISE!" she flourished her hand, fisted, dramatically into the air for emphasis.

Callen gave the first sincere smile she had yet to see in many days, "A bit dramatic, even for you Hetty."

She chuckled, enjoying the momentary step back in time to their more carefree visits. She shrugged with a grin… "Yes, well, when surrounded by such great authors, you can't help but be inspired!" She noted the many shelves laden with books… most of them first editions and some autographed… some written in several languages….

"I guess."

Hetty could see he was in pain and was beginning to tire. She patted his knee as she spoke once more, "You need your rest, Mr. Callen. Marcus will have my hide for keeping you up so late."

"About Marcus and this sleeping business…" Callen hinted at the obvious aid in his earlier nap.

"Best not to borrow trouble, eh, Mr. Callen?" she began to tidy the tray in preparation to return it to the kitchen on her way to her own room when Callen stopped her.

"Stay…" he started, his voice uncertain as he turned to look at her.

"I beg your pardon, Mr. Callen?" she asked, equally taken by surprise.

"I was just wondering if…" he struggled to get the words out… fighting his own emotions, "would you stay for just a while and maybe read one of your books?"

She now found herself struggling with her own emotions though inside her heart rejoiced, it was just one more memory of his time living with her as a boy that she cherished dearly… clearing her throat she set the tray back on the table as she replied, "Of course, did you have one in mind or should I choose?"

Callen merely shrugged, "Your choice, I trust you." Callen wasn't at all sure who was more taken by surprise at this choice of words, himself or Hetty… yet he found a strange comfort in the realization that he meant them.

'I trust you'… three words she thought she would never again hear from this man and it was nearly her undoing. Clearing her throat and swallowing against the lump in her throat she replied, "Let me just go find one…"

He smiled as he listened to her mumbling to herself or no doubt the authors of the books she loved so much… He lay back on the couch and closed his eyes remembering the days as a boy when she would sit and read to him from one of these very books… often times in other languages… challenging him to guess which language it was.

Hetty read to her boy even beyond where she knew he was asleep and then just as she had done many times before, she took the coverlet from the back of the couch and draped it across the man she looked on as her son… the boy who would always hold a special place in her heart had finally come home.

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Epilogue:

Callen walked the water's edge just as he had done every morning for the past two months since the team, Gibbs and Marcus had finally found their way back to their own homes. Hetty had given him the keys to the beach house for as long as he wanted them and then she too returned to her own home… which, once again, changed frequently. He understood the need and knew that it would be little different for him once he was ready to move forward.

True to his nature, Callen withdrew into himself as he worked through what had happened over the past several years… trying to make sense of who he was now and where he was headed.

Gibbs would call in once a week and Callen made sure to take it, Kamran texted him frequently just to check that he was still in town.

Alexandra had tried numerous times to get a hold of him but as yet, Callen had refused the calls in the misguided belief that she was better off without him… but never was she far from his thoughts as he frequently checked on them from a distance.

Hetty had once again invited him to come for Sunday dinners just as they used to before he left. He had accepted a few times and conversations were kept to literature, current cases, and politics.

Try though she might, Hetty had, as yet, found no answers to Garrisons fascination with Parker… but she wasn't done looking… she would get the answers she wanted… needed… for Callen…

There were still things Callen needed answers to… The message from Owen seemed, somehow, incomplete. For now, he would place it in his tea box… and when the time was right, he would revisit it. For now though, Callen found himself just facing down the day he was to return to the OSP once more as one of her agents… To say he remained conflicted about the decision was putting it lightly. He still had qualms where the team was concerned in regards to whether they could truly accept him back after everything but in the end… he had nowhere else to go… and once he had regained his strength and some sense of clarity, he knew allowing Iosif and Victor to dictate the rest of his life was not an option… and so, he made the decision to stay… it wasn't going to be an easy ride but then, as Hetty liked to remind him… Nothing worth having ever came easy…

NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA === NCIS LA

Two days later, Callen stood in front of the building he had thought he would never again see. It still looked old and dilapidated on the outside… "only on the outside G, only on the outside", rang through his memory…

He stared at the door, his feet unwilling to make the move, fear of what his coming back could mean for all concerned when yet one more memory came to mind… Marie's voice carried the message just as clearly as the first day she said it so long ago now, 'Pe cealalta parte a fricii sta libertatea'. "On the other side of fear lies freedom", he murmured to himself, "I hope you are right, Marie." and with a sigh he opened the door and stepped inside.

 **The End… or is it? ?**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: Well, here we are… WOW! What a journey, huh? These characters have a way of just absconding with the pen and creating their own story. This was supposed to be a story with just 3 or 4 chapters… That was four stories ago, now. I hope you enjoyed taking this ride with me. I'm sure you probably picked up the fact that no story is ever truly finished… especially Callen's.**

 **Let me know what you think! I promised I would put the team back to straights… did I keep that promised sufficiently? What's still lurking in the past that shouldn't be uncovered? How will the team get on, now that Callen has returned to the fold? Will Eric remain as bold as he was during the rescue? Will the friendships be rebuilt? I would love to hear your thoughts.**

 **I have another story to post soon. Just a wee one this time. A few ideas for future stories are never discouraged. Thanks for being such great readers and reviewers. It's been FANTASTIC!**


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